


The End of the Beginning

by Xenobia



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Future, Alternate Universe - Reincarnation, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Canon Compliant, Canon Era, Emotional Hurt, Flashbacks, M/M, Major Character Injury, Minor Character Death, Nerd Erwin Smith, Oral Sex, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Character Death, Post Titan War, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Role Reversal, Romance, Scruffy Levi, Semi-Public Sex, Sex Toys Under Clothing, Soldier Levi, Spanking, Spoilers, Unrequited Love, Unresolved Sexual Tension, War, Wet Dream, Yaoi, bottom!Erwin, bottom!levi, eruri - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-05
Updated: 2017-06-04
Packaged: 2018-08-19 18:48:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 24
Words: 173,964
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8221183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Xenobia/pseuds/Xenobia
Summary: Erwin Smith is a writer who dabbles in freelance journalism. His country of Sina is embroiled in a civil war going on in the country of Maria. He gets the opportunity to travel abroad to get a first-hand account of the war, its hardships and the struggles of everyone involved. He wasn't expecting to meet up with a man he thought was just a character his mind created in his dreams, nor did he expect to end up under his protection.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This story will contain flashback scenes from the canon setting and timeline, as well as the main present day/Reincarnation storyline. Additionally, in the modern setting, many locations share the names of locations from the walled settlement in the canon timeline, though the titan wars are long over with and the walls are ancient ruins, now. Additional tags will likely be added later on as the story progresses, and the rating may go up from Mature to Explicit, with time.

_*Disclaimer: This fanfiction is for entertainment, non-profit purposes only. I do not claim ownership of any canon characters or the world that this is set in._

* * *

_Survey Corps Headquarters, 844_

"Do you really know just what you've brought into our regiment, Smith?"

Erwin stood tall and calm before the High Commander of Survey Corps, with both hands clasped behind his back. He gave his superior officer a single, respectful nod. "I've found us a weapon, sir. A powerful one, if used properly."

Keith stared at him, the shadows of weariness around his eyes seeming to deepen. "A weapon, you say. Son, weapons are just tools that can't act on their own outside of the hands of their wielder."

"I'll 'wield' this one," promised Erwin. "It will take time to master, but you'll see. This will eventually give the Survey Corps and humanity a major advantage in our cause. Please, just trust me."

The older man considered him mutely for a few heartbeats, scanning Erwin's form shrewdly. "You'll 'wield' him, will you? Now that I'd like to see. I don't have your imagination Smith, but I could almost laugh at the mental picture. Granted, the little thug's small enough that you could probably pick him up and swing him like a titan blade—"

"You know what I meant, sir."

"Yes, damn it, I knew what you meant." Keith sighed. "Look at your hands, Erwin."

The blond's mouth tightened slightly, and he unclasped said hands from behind his back. He withdrew them from concealment and held them out before him, regarding the bandaged appendages. "They are healing. The damage wasn't severe enough to compromise my abilities in the field."

"That could have been your throat," Shadis reminded, nodding pointedly at the recovering injuries. "Smith, you know I usually support your ideas, but this is no stray pup you can take in and raise to be a guard dog. It's not a colt to break in. This Levi character came from the Underground and he seems pretty set in his ways. He was after your blood, and after the deaths of his comrades in the last expedition—under _your_ watch, I might add—you can't convince me this fellow isn't still after it."

"He had his chance," insisted Erwin. "He didn't take it. He's made his choice."

"That doesn't mean he won't have a change of heart, once he's finished grieving and has the chance to think things through some more."

Shadis shook his head, evidently giving up on trying to convince Erwin to eject Levi out of the Scouts and throw him behind bars. "You're a brilliant young man, Smith; the finest tactician I've seen and definitely one of the bravest soldiers I've ever commanded. I just hope those iron guts of yours don't land you in a situation you can't survive."

Keith opened his middle desk drawer, and he pulled out a box, which he slid across the desk toward the blond. "Either way, it's officially out of my hands, now. Final paperwork has been done, I'm retiring, and Survey Corps is yours to lead."

Erwin frowned a bit, opened it up and looked inside to see the traditional symbol of his regiment's High Commander resting in the felt black lining: the bolo tie. He looked at Shadis, realizing now why the man wasn't wearing it. Usually the bolo was passed on to the next person upon the last commander's death, but he and Shadis had already discussed how this instance would differ.

He just hadn't expected Keith to go through with it so soon.

"Sir…"

"I'm no longer fit for this kind of work," said Shadis. "Everything we've done that's brought us any results in the past year has been because of your ideas. I've lost what it takes to be a good leader, but you've proven that you have it and more. Good luck to you, son."

* * *

With his new bolo tie safely tucked into a pocket of his uniform jacket, Erwin left the office that he would soon be claiming as his own. The High Commander. He wanted to believe he had the mettle for the job, the drive to lead his men and women into battle without regretting his command decisions. Such a responsibility was a heavy weight for anyone to bear, though. It had broken Shadis. Erwin knew that he could still count on his mentor to give him advice when he asked for it, but if leading the Survey Corps could shatter a strong man like Keith, Erwin couldn't delude himself into thinking it wouldn't eventually do the same to him.

"Broken heart, broken mind, or broken body?" mused the blond, his footsteps echoing in the lonely corridors of Scout headquarters. "Which will end me first, I wonder?"

One of them would put an end to his time as the commander eventually, he was sure of that. Death was the most likely to be the arbitrator, given previous commanders' examples. Whether he met a bloody end in the jaws of a titan or to a soul-crushing breakdown, his time was limited. Until then, however, Erwin had every intention of pushing on, of fighting for humanity's survival and freedom until he had nothing left to give.

He had already narrowed down his choices of a successor to two people for the day when his time as commander was up. He could make the final decision later. He had at least a month before the next expedition outside the walls to finalize that choice. Right now, his mind was on something else.

Erwin's feet carried him to the barracks wing, to the location where he'd last seen the man he had been referring to as a weapon for humanity. He turned three corners, until he made it to one of the barracks storage rooms. Levi was right where Erwin had last seen him, seated atop a stack of crates by the window. His legs were pulled up tightly, his arms wrapped around him. Hunched and brooding, the small recruit sat still as a statue in the flickering, dim torchlight. He hadn't spoken to anyone save Hange since their return from the expedition that cost Levi's friends their lives. He hadn't tried to kill Erwin again, but he hadn't yet given him a definitive, verbal answer to his proposal, either. That he had returned to them without attempting to defect in the night was enough, for now.

Erwin watched Levi silently, sure the man sensed his presence even if he didn't react or acknowledge it. He was dressed in clean clothing, but he was unkempt. Levi's raven, undercut hair lacked its usual luster, to Erwin's observant gaze. He hadn't brushed it. He'd cleaned himself up enough to remove the traces of blood and gore from his ordeal, but that seemed to be the extent of it. He even had a hint of stubble on his jaw, which surprised Erwin a bit. Levi had been so smooth of face since the day Erwin first saw him that the blond was half-convinced he couldn't even grow facial hair.

_You poor creature. Have I broken you?_

Silently morose and scruffy, Levi _should_ have been a pitiful sight. Even as Erwin thought so, he couldn't feel it with any conviction. He felt sorrow for Levi's loss, but not regret for his own part in it. He felt compassion for the smaller man, but no pity. If he had to do it all again, Erwin knew he wouldn't have changed anything. He couldn't have foreseen Farlan and Isabel dying on their first expedition. That had been out of his hands, and they were just two casualties amongst many lost to the Scouts that day.

Levi lifted his head, and his hooded gray eyes glittered in his pale, sculpted face. His stare eliminated Erwin's concern that he was broken, and when Levi spoke, his words were further proof.

"Checking to see if I flew the coop, or what?"

Erwin had to admire Levi's spirit. He was tragic but beautiful to him.

"Something like that," he answered softly, "though I didn't believe you would. I would like to hear an answer, Levi. I want to hear you pledge yourself to the cause."

Levi affixed him with a cold stare. "I'll follow you into Hell, Erwin Smith. I'll see for myself if your vision is worth a shit, and if it's not, then I'll at least see you go down, some day. You've got me."

It wasn't the most inspiring oath of service one could hope for, but considering the source, Erwin knew for certain that he had succeeded in securing Levi's devotion—if not to him, than at least to the vision.

"That's all I can ask of you, right now."

Erwin turned and walked away, deliberately giving his back to the other man. It wasn't a test, on Erwin's part. It was a solemn demonstration of his trust and confidence that Levi would not stab him in the back. There was the slightest tingle of apprehension at the nape of Erwin's neck that didn't fade until he was outside in the corridor, and he let loose the breath he hadn't realized he was holding.

Neither he nor Levi could have imagined just how profoundly that conversation would influence their futures, their interactions with one another, how they'd come to see their world, both in this life and the next.

* * *

-End of prologue


	2. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Crap, I wasn't going to start uploading this right away, but we've got a hurricane coming and everyone else's panic has infected me. Have an early published chapter. Love you guys. Enjoy the Eruri nerdiness!

He awoke with a start as his alarm went off. The sound had robbed him of a few precious moments that might have revealed something more to him of the dream he'd been reviewing. Erwin muttered in disappointment, rolling over in his queen-sized, antique bed to reach for the clock radio. He squinted at the digital numbers on it, though he knew what time his alarm went off each workday. He compressed the button on the top that would make the retro-style modern clock-radio turn off. But for the digital display panel, the device looked like an old-time desk radio from generations back, before he was born. Sitting up in his bed, the blond rubbed at his eyes before stretching.

The first thing that he did was reach for the journal situated on the oaken bedside table next to his clock radio. Next, he grabbed his reading glasses, and he propped them on his face to assist his task. He lay on his side as he flipped the diary open to the last book-marked page and immediately started to write beneath the day's date that he had already put in under his last entry.

 _"Strange dreams again last night,"_ the writer hastily scribbled, trying to get as much as he could recall on paper before all details faded in his mind. _"I was in a keep of some sort; old military building? Stone walls, seemed to be late medieval era in structure. No electricity, only torches. I was talking to an older man about some kind of weapon. Hands were bandaged. He was telling me I was being promoted to a higher rank. Can't remember the rank. Then I went down a floor, maybe two, and I talked to someone else in a room with crates in it. We seemed to have an uneasy relationship. Don't think he liked me very much. He had dark hair, a small build, and—"_

Just as Erwin was about to try and describe the details he remembered of that person in the crate room, his home phone rang. He cursed softly, and he again wondered why in the hell he'd chosen to put a docking station in his bedroom. He'd left his mobile phone charging in the kitchen overnight so that he wouldn't be disturbed if someone tried to call him too early, but he'd forgotten to turn off the ringer and mute the answering machine on his bedroom landline, again.

With a sigh, the blond man set down his pen, rolled over and picked up the cordless phone from the dock on the opposite bedside table. "Good morning," he greeted out of polite habit, without even checking the caller ID. "Smith residence."

"Erwin, it's Nile. I was just calling to make sure you were awake."

"Why wouldn't I be?" Erwin covered up a yawn. "Have I ever been late for any work you find for me?"

"No, but your schedule's been pretty regular, lately. Remember, you asked me to check in on you in case you forgot to set your alarm early, today. You need to be at the airport by nine, with all of your travel documentation and your passport ready."

That was right; he was going to have a flight to catch. This was no ordinary day, with ordinary freelance opportunities to fill his pockets. The reminder that he had a very special, very unique and probably very dangerous opportunity ahead of him, Erwin perked up. He glanced at his clock again. No wonder he felt so sluggish. He was used to getting a couple of extra hours' sleep in, and he'd forgotten that he'd adjusted his alarm setting.

"Thanks, Nile. I just woke up. I'll get cleaned up and be ready by the time you get here. You're still planning to give me a ride and see me off, aren't you?"

"Yes. I should be there just after eight. We'll get you there in time."

"I appreciate it," said Erwin, smiling. He was getting excited. This was going to be an adventure, and it may just prove to be the break he'd been looking for in his career. "Say 'hello' to Marie for me. I'm going to shower and have breakfast. See you around eight."

"Will do, and see you then," answered his friend.

Erwin hung up the phone and replaced it on the dock. He turned back around in his bed to regard his journal, trying to pick up where he left off before getting ready. He struggled to recall the details of last part of his dream, to conjure up a clear mental picture of the man he'd been talking to. When it wouldn't come to him, he gave up with a sigh and scratched down a finale note.

"I can't remember what he looked like. Only that he seemed small in build, dark-haired and pale. He didn't seem to like me. That's all I can remember."

Erwin read over his entry with a frown. For some reason, it really bothered him that he couldn't remember those final details. He was used to many of his dreams being strange and blurred. They sometimes had vivid moments that made him swear they weren't dreams, but Erwin had always had a big imagination. He'd always been a bit of a dreamer, though that never compromised his ability to focus sharply in school and be observant of the world around him. His mother believed those qualities could shape Erwin into an amazing author, but his father always discouraged him from that path, believing he was destined for greater things than writing books. It was ironic, since his mother was in the Military Police, and his father was a history and literature teacher.

Erwin had chosen to follow his writing dream, though for a while, he came close to enlisting in the military and following his mother's footsteps. Hopefully, he could make both of his parents proud and prove his father wrong about writing being a dead-end career. He closed the journal and replaced the pen in its side compartment, securing the buckle holding the book closed.

* * *

"Marie, I didn't expect you to come too." Erwin smiled at the curvy, auburn-haired woman as she stepped through his door behind her husband. He gladly gave her a hug when she held her arms out in greeting.

"Well, you're going to be gone for a while," Marie excused, giving the tall blond a fond squeeze before stepping back. "Do you have everything?"

Erwin cast a final look around at his surroundings, going through his mental checklist. The single bedroom house he was renting didn't have a lot of square footage: just the living room, the kitchen, a little breakfast nook and the bedroom. Most of his furnishings were antiques from flea markets and local dealers. The rest were replicas like his clock radio and his television. In fact, very few of the things Erwin owned actually looked like modern electronics and appliances. With a little pang, he realized that he was going to miss the cozy familiarity of his little home while he was away.

"Yes," Erwin finally said, checking his jacket pockets to be sure he had his wallet, passport, documents and tickets. "I have everything. Nile, just don't forget to feed—"

"I know, I know," interrupted the brunet man. "I'll feed your fish while you're away, and I'll bring your mail in for you. Don't worry."

Erwin smiled at him. "Thanks. I've left instructions on the fridge. Everything you need to know should be there: feeding, pump maintenance, water temperature. If you do have any questions and can't reach me, I've left the number of the man I bought them from."

"Don't know why you picked something with so much upkeep," grumbled Nile.

"Koi fish ponds aren't any worse than most tanks," objected Erwin. The pond beneath the little covered porch in his tiny back yard was a source of quiet pride for him. There wasn't much yard at all; just enough for him to put in some privacy trellises and plant some climbing ivy. That was his little Zen spot for writing or reading a good book.

"I'll take your word for it." Nile looked at the single, black duffle bag waiting by the front door, and he nodded at it. "Is that all you're taking?"

Erwin slung his laptop bag over his shoulder, and he patted it. "That, and this. They told me to pack lightly; mostly underwear and socks, with only up to four changes of civilian clothes. It seems I'll be wearing military issued attire to fit in with the troops while I'm on this journey."

"But wait a minute," Marie said with a worried look, "wouldn't it be better if you didn't fit in with the troops? You aren't a soldier, Erwin. You're a writer! If you're dressed the same way as our military, the opposition will shoot at you as well as the soldiers you're with! Maybe if you're dressed in your civilian clothes—"

"Honey, it's for his own protection," Nile interjected. "Don't you remember that story on the news about the reporter that got taken prisoner and publicly executed? The hostiles over there don't play nice with Sinarians, whether they're dressed in common clothes or military clothes. They want to kill us all. At least if they think he's a trained soldier, they won't pick him as an easy target."

"Nile, that's enough," said Erwin firmly when Marie paled at the mention of the broadcasted execution of that unfortunate reporter. To Marie, he spoke in a more gentle tone. "Yes, the hostiles try to abduct reporters rather than shoot them in a firefight. Sometimes they ransom them. Sometimes they try to get information out of them, counting on them to crack sooner than a trained soldier would. Sometimes they take it further and use them as an example. A warning, if you will."

"You really aren't making me feel any better about this," she said tightly, pressing a hand against her bosom. "Erwin, do you really have to do this? It isn't too late to change your mind. We like you in one piece."

Erwin smiled fondly at her, and he tweaked a strand of her hair. "I'm going to be fine. I need to do this. There's more behind this conflict than what the media has told us so far. I want to hear all sides. I want to know what it's like for our soldiers, for the opposition's, for the civilians caught up in it...everything. This is the biggest, most important opportunity I've had in my life to write something that could actually make a difference. You understand that, don't you?"

She sighed, and she glanced at her husband. "No, I don't...but we both support you. Otherwise we wouldn't be here right now."

"That's what I want to hear." Erwin smiled at her again, and he pinched her chin.

"Hey, I know the two of you were highschool sweethearts, but remember whose ring that is she's wearing on her finger."

Erwin laughed at his friend's half-joking, half-warning comment. He backed off, and he spread his hands. "Point taken. Marie is like a sister to me though, Nile. You shouldn't be so jealous."

Nile grumbled, picking up Erwin's duffle bag to carry it out for him. He said nothing more about it, and Erwin let the subject drop. Nile did have the right to protest when other men got too friendly with his wife, and Erwin didn't begrudge him that. It was probably only due to Nile's awareness of Erwin's increasing lack of interest in the female sex that he let the blond get away with as much as he did. Being old friends probably helped, as well.

* * *

Erwin thumbed through his dream journal on the way to the airport, and he paused at his last entry. His thick brows lowered a bit, a frown of concentration pulling at his lips. He re-read that last sentence to himself several times, again trying to recall fine details about that man at the end of his dream. He glanced up at the driver's seat in front of him, where Nile sat. Nile had dark hair. He was lean of build. Maybe he was the man in the dream.

Erwin dismissed the idea quickly. Nile had made appearances in his dreams before. So had Marie. Their faces were as clear as day to him. Erwin was getting used to having dreams of him and his friends in some strange medieval setting. In some of them, he was arguing with Nile. In others, they were holding intense conversation with each other, discussing military matters that Erwin could never quite recall the details of.

The man sitting on the crates in his dream definitely wasn't Nile. He was much paler, for one, and the shape of his face—what Erwin could recall of it—was more refined and smaller. Nile had a long face. The fellow in his dream didn't. Nile tended to man-spread whenever he sat down, sprawling rather gangly legs to get comfortable. The person in his dream had been compact in his seat, but graceful like a feline. If Nile had tried to sit that way, he'd have fallen off and busted his head open.

Erwin tried to shrug it off. It was probably just some dream phantom he'd conjured in his mind, and his imagination hadn't yet finished filling out the character. There was something compelling about Mr. Crate, though.

Erwin smirked, shaking his head. "Mr. Crate," he muttered under his breath. Well, he had no other name to call the guy, at least not that he could remember.

"Did you say something, Erwin?" Marie turned around in the front passenger seat to look back at him.

"No, I was just clearing my throat. Nile, I think this is the exit you need to take, coming up on the right. Yes, that's the one we need to get to my gate."

Nile shrugged and put his blinker on to pull off of the interstate. Erwin closed his journal back up, put it away, and took his thoughts off of his dreams. He had more pressing things to concern him right now, and perhaps this new character he'd started developing in his mind would flesh out more in the future, much the was Shadis and Mike had. Erwin no longer thought it was so strange to feel such a personal connection to the characters he made up in his head. He'd created them, after all.

* * *

Early November, 844, outside Wall Maria. Titan territory:

"Sir, the left flank spotters have disengaged as you ordered!" The scout courier from that team was bloodied and wide-eyed, with a telling stain spreading over the crotch of his pants. "Should they re-join the platoon? Will you tighten the formation, Commander?"

With a mouth full of road dust and his cloak trying to strangle him as it flapped behind him, Erwin nearly choked trying to answer the young man. At his side, Mike spoke up. "They're closing in."

Erwin looked at his squad leader. While Erwin issued the command orders for the entire platoon, Mike was the one that kept the soldiers in their squad in check, leading them on at Erwin's side.

"From which direction, Mike?"

The other blond nodded to the left, jerking his whiskered chin back a little. "The spotters. They're leading them right to us."

Erwin looked that way, narrowing his eyes against the sun's glare and the grit flying up from the pounding hooves of their mounts. He could see dust clouds in that direction, and within those dust clouds, big, monstrous shapes that lacked definition. Closer to the ground, he could see a mass of smaller figures grouped closely together. Mike was right; the spotters were leading their pursuit right to the rest of the formation. By the red flares firing off from that small group, arching back behind them, they were trying to foil the titans' vision, muddle their senses with the smoky shells. Sometimes the tactic worked, but the seven titans Erwin counted were evidently too intent upon their prey to take much notice of the distraction.

"Soldier, go and meet up with your squad," decided Erwin quickly, "and tell them to divert those titans from this heading. Under no circumstances are they to approach this platoon until they've either lost pursuit or dispatched those titans."

"B-but Commander, there were only ten of us left when I broke away! Probably even less of us now!"

"I gave you an order," Erwin replied coldly, his voice matching the growing chill in his soul. He couldn't risk the entire left flank for the sake of a few, and the command squad absolutely could not break formation to engage. "Survive, and meet back up with us whenever possible. This is my decision."

The young scout looked devastated, but he nodded with a quivering lip. "Sir!"

He wheeled away on his horse, charging back for his group with the sort of desperation of a man that knew he was heading straight to his death, but wouldn't abandon his comrades. Erwin sighed, closing his eyes briefly. Mike was a solid, quiet presence to his right, neither judging nor questioning his decision.

Someone else within the command formation, however, felt differently.

"Hey, where are you going?" Hanji Zoë hollered, her husky voice carrying over the chill wind.

Erwin looked over his shoulder toward Hanji's squad, and he saw a familiar small figure on a sleek black stallion breaking away from his assigned place in the formation. He was going after the missive from the spotters, following him without saying a word to anyone.

The demon from the underground. The brooding raven that rarely spoke to anyone except to wrack them with profanities when they annoyed him. The one that had come very close to assassinating Erwin.

The one that humanity so desperately needed, and Erwin needed by his side.

"Corporal," shouted Erwin, panic warring with admiration within him. "Get back into formation!"

He may as well have been whispering to a deaf man, for all the acknowledgement Erwin received. Forest green cloak billowing out behind him, lean, powerful thighs bunched, black hair whipping in the wind, the former thug kept going. Straight as a black arrow, humanity's weapon streaked across the field on his mount, soon overtaking the courier that had carried the news of his squad's crisis.

Hanji broke away from her squad to ride up next to Erwin, falling into place on his left side. "Whew, that little runt is a handful, isn't he? Maybe you should have assigned him to the support teams, Erwin. He's pretty quick to cut down any titans that get too close to this flank."

Erwin was still staring at the form of the person of subject, his jaw tight and his eyes cold like chipped ice.

"Hanji's got a point," Mike said. "He's already got a higher unassisted kill count than some veterans do—not including myself."

"I need him within the center command flanks," Erwin stubbornly insisted. "Rage won't carry him forever. Sooner or later it's going to burn out, and he's going to slip. I won't see it all go to waste."

* * *

_Present day, somewhere over the Midean Ocean:_

Erwin awoke with a start, jostled from his doze by a sudden lurch and drop. It was alarming at first, until the plane's captain announced that they were hitting some turbulence while descending to Shiganshina. Erwin straightened up in his chair, tightened his seatbelt and turned on the display screen set into the back of the seat in front of his. He went to the flight information screen to see when touchdown was expected. Fifteen minutes. They appeared to be right on schedule.

He liberated his dream journal as he stretched, flipping it open to begin writing. His handwriting was sloppier than usual due to turbulence, but Erwin was used to scribbling down notes on the fly and interpreting them later on.

_"I dreamed about him again. The man sitting on the crate. This is the second time in as many days, and I still didn't get a good look at him. We were riding on an open plain, running from something. Those giants. The titans. It was them. Hanji was there, and so was Mike. It appears they are my most trusted allies and advisors in this fantasy I've invented. I now have a name to refer to this new person, or at least a rank. He's a corporal in my regiment, and apparently a hot-headed one. Can't remember the details; something about part of the platoon being trapped. I wasn't sending aid because it would have endangered us all. Wish I could remember why._

_"The new man took off to assist despite my orders not to. I can't help but admire him, and I wish I had more than two glimpses of him. He's an intriguing character. I've learned not to consciously try to fill in the blanks and allow my muses to do that in their own time, though. I feel I would do the corporal a disservice by getting in a rush to flesh him out. Perhaps that will come with time, as it has with the others."_

The flight attendant announced that they were coming in for a landing, and he requested that all carry-on and personal items be stowed until the aircraft came to a complete stop. Erwin put his journal away again and sat back, trying to wake himself up from his doze.

* * *

"Erwin Smith?"

The writer glanced down at the sign he was holding up with his own name on it, and he raised a thick blond brow at the uniformed man that had issued the question. "How did you guess?"

"Cute." The man's light blue eyes were shadowed under the brim of his green military cap. He had a severe look to him, like he'd seen too much and lost his sense of humor along the way. He couldn't have been older than Erwin, yet his features were rougher…more aged. "Well, if we can dispense with the comedy, I'm Major Elliot Clines. My compatriots and I will be providing you with proper attire, tags and transport to the location of Scout Recon squad 17. From there, you'll be Captain Scott Williard's responsibility."

Major Clines leaned closer to speak to Erwin in a low, stern voice. "We're in neutral territory right now, but things are going to change very fast, once we head north. Listen to what you're told and obey it like it comes from the mouth of God himself, understand? Otherwise, this is going to be a very short trip for you. Understood?"

Erwin impulsively straightened up, nearly standing at attention. He gave a curt nod of understanding, all kidding vanishing from him. "I understand."

Clines relaxed. "Good. That all the luggage you brought?" He nodded at the duffle bag sitting at Erwin's feet.

"This, and what's in my shoulder bag," confirmed Erwin. He watched as one of the two soldiers with Clines picked up the duffle bag. "I'm ready when you are."

"He's a lot less trouble than the last one," remarked the female Brigade soldier with a smirk. Her hazel eyes roved over Erwin's tall form briefly. "A lot cuter, too."

"Let me remind you of what happened to the last one," uttered Clines under his breath, casting an observant look around at the people passing by in the baggage claim area. "Enough talk, soldier."

"Yes sir," she agreed. "Enough said."

* * *

Erwin rode in a military chopper from the airport, and he could feel the chill growing in the air as they moved further north. He took out his camera, and he leaned as far over as he could to reach the nearest window. He took photos of farmlands they passed over, most still intact at first, but scarcer and more in states of neglect the further north they traveled. He took several shots of a town in ruins at the foot of the mountains. He took other pictures of the horizon, impressed by the array of colors and landscape that he never saw at home.

When they landed at the base and exited the aircraft, Erwin looked around at all of the soldiers busily coming and going. Dressed in camouflage uniforms like the one he'd put on before setting out from the airport, most of them kept their hair shaved close or, in the case of the women, up in buns, tight braids or ponytails.

"I'm looking for Captain Williard," said Major Clines when a female soldier approached asking for identification. "Where is he?"

She stood at stiff attention and saluted him. "Sir! I'm afraid there's been some complications. If you'll wait here for a moment, I'll fetch Captain Ackerman for you. He can explain better than I can."

Clines nodded. "We'll wait here, then."

Erwin, meanwhile, was turning the name "Ackerman" over in his head, wondering why it had such a familiar ring to it. "Ackerman," he muttered, scratching his chin with a frown. "Ackerman...where do I know that name from?"

Within moments, he had his answer. It didn't come to him immediately, though. The female soldier had rushed off to one of the bigger tents—a command tent, if Erwin wasn't mistaken. Shortly after that, a man emerged from within, and he followed her back to Erwin's group by the transport chopper. His head was covered by a camouflage military cap, and he wore a pair of shades over his eyes. He was small of build, but clearly athletic in form. His arms were bare in the sleeveless green shirt he wore, pale and toned. His face was sculpted, almost delicate in bone structure. His jaw bore a shadow of dark stubble. He had a small, attractive nose that Erwin dared to say could be considered cute. He walked with a predatory grace towards them, and the closer he got, the more familiar he seemed to the writer.

He'd seen this guy before somewhere, but how was that possible? Had he seen his photo somewhere in the news? There was a lot of coverage on this conflict. It was entirely possible that this man's picture might have made it into one of the broadcasts or in the paper.

While Erwin stared at him and pondered, the short man stopped before the group. It was difficult to tell which direction he was looking, with the shades masking his eyes. He looked up at Major Clines, and he gave the taller man a respectful nod.

"Major. You've got lousy timing."

"I wouldn't know, considering nobody has given me any information," replied the major. "Where is Captain Williard? I need to speak with him regarding an assignment."

The captain sighed, and he took his cap off to reveal hair so black that it shone with blue-ish highlights in the late afternoon sun. It was fashioned in an undercut, parted a little to the right. Erwin gave a little start, and he stared at the man. A feeling was coming over him, and a chill went up his spine. Then the captain followed up by yanking his glasses off of his face, and the moment Erwin saw the man's hooded, pale gray eyes, he realized where he knew him from.

Now he finally had a face to go with Corporal Crate.

"Good luck with that," stated Captain Ackerman. He reached into his uniform jacket pocket to pull out a pair of dog tags, stained rusty with dried blood. He offered them up to the major. "Dead men can't discuss assignments."

Clines took the offered tags, staring at them for a moment before regarding the captain again. "What happened?"

Ackerman shrugged. "We got a distress call from the 17th recon at 0912 hours today. Captain Williard was on his way with his men to deliver some intel to Reconnaissance Squad 19. They got ambushed by insurgents in the hills. My men and I responded, but by the time we got there, Williard was already shot dead. We managed to overpower the opposition and save half of his platoon, but he never made it to his assigned checkpoint."

Captain Ackerman shrugged again, his shoulders twitching with tension that didn't show in the bland, almost bored expression on his face. "I've got the data. We're splitting the remainder of Recon 17 between my squad and others. I'll finish his mission for him and get that intel to Recon 19 by tomorrow."

Those mysterious, heavy-lidded eyes flicked to Erwin. They roved over him assessingly, and Ackerman's small mouth pulled into a pouty frown. "So who's the big blond guy? New recruit?"

"In a manner of speaking, yes," answered Clines. He glanced sidelong at Erwin, and he lowered his voice. "This is Erwin Smith. He's a journalist, and he's here to document the events of this conflict. Williard approved the request to take him in."

Ackerman huffed a little. "Tch, so now I suppose you're going to tell me he's my responsibility."

"I'm afraid so," confirmed the major. "He was assigned to Recon 17, but now I suppose he's with you and Recon 16. Is this going to be an issue for you, Captain?"

"Hmph...no more than anything else, I suppose." Ackerman tilted his head, narrowing his eyes against the sunlight as he stared up at Erwin. "Hey blondie, do you have any military training at all, or is that getup you're wearing just for show?"

"I know how to use a gun," offered Erwin, "but I've never actually been in the service."

Even as he said the second part, it sounded wrong to him. Erwin _had_ been in the service before, but not in this lifetime. He couldn't say that part out loud, though. Doing so would give everyone around him the immediate impression of mental illness, and he certainly couldn't tell this small, intense man that he knew him from his dreams. He looked at the dogtags hanging around the captain's neck, and he read the name aloud. "Ackerman, Levi. So your first name is Levi?"

Levi tapped the silver tags, giving a humorless smirk. "How'd you guess?"

Erwin immediately felt a rapport with the smaller man. It was almost the same as when he'd arrived at the airport and been approached by the major. While Erwin himself wasn't generally a smartass, he could tell immediately that the same didn't hold true for Levi. Perhaps he'd been channeling him when he first arrived. It was a shock to the system, seeing a piece of his recent dreams standing before him as a living, breathing human being.

_I didn't just make you up at all. You really exist. How is this possible?_

Nile and Marie were the only people in his reoccurring dreams of that strange time period that he knew to be real. Everyone else—so Erwin believed—were just figments of his active imagination. If Levi was real, then perhaps the others were, as well. What if they weren't just dreams? What if they were past life recollections, or ancestral recall? What if everyone in those dreams was in fact alive today, reborn and destined to meet up with him again at some point? Erwin had never really believed in reincarnation before, but now he had to re-evaluate that belief.

"Levi," he said again, tasting the name. He nodded. It suited him. He'd never thought the name "Levi" was particularly enthralling before, but attached to this intense, short man, it suddenly became a very powerful name in Erwin's mind.

Levi arched a brow at him, and he looked at the major. "He's not hard of hearing, is he? That's twice now that he's repeated my name. Hey blondie, what's your problem?" Levi's iron gaze flashed to Erwin again. "You'd think my name was something exotic, the way you keep saying it."

"I'm just memorizing it," excused Erwin, feeling heat rise in his cheeks. He sure as hell wasn't about to tell the man he found his name as fascinating at its bearer. "If I'm going to be with your squad for a while, I feel it's important to commit your name to memory. Unless, of course, you would prefer I simply refer to you as 'Captain' at all times."

The rank title really did suit Levi, as well. To Erwin, it seemed as natural as the man's given name, like Levi Ackerman was born for it. In his dream—unless he was simply applying this soldier's face to a fictional character—he'd referred to Levi as a corporal. He wondered if that was accurate, or if he was just recalling details wrong. Hell, he shouldn't be so flippantly assuming this man before him was actually the same man he'd dreamed about, but the more he heard Levi talk, the more like Erwin's dream person he sounded.

"You ought to be addressing me by rank anyway," Levi informed him with a warning look. "You can call me Captain Levi, though. So I'm stuck with this guy?" He directed the question at the major.

"I'm afraid so, yes," answered Clines. "Things may change once I get word from the higher ups. Since you've taken over for Captain Williard, Mr. Smith will be your responsibility until otherwise informed. Is that going to cause an issue for you, Captain Ackerman?"

Levi shrugged. "As long as he does as he's told and doesn't get in the way, it should be fine. Do you want to deliver the data that Williard was trying to deliver, Major, or is that up to me as well?"

"I can take care of that," assured Clines, holding his hand out. "We'll be airborne again soon, and it will be much faster than a ground convoy. Safer, as well."

Levi nodded in agreement. He dug through his inner jacket pockets, and he withdrew a small flash drive device. "Here. I'm glad to be rid of it. Make sure it gets to Colonel Jones at the base camp outside Crystal Flats. That's who it was meant to go to."

Levi glanced over his shoulder at a row of covered bodies. "If you can send transport here for the dead, it'd be appreciated. Their bodies should make it home to their families, if possible. Too bad there wasn't enough left of Williard to salvage for his family."

"That bad, was it?" asked Clines grimly.

"He took an explosive shell to the face, along with a dozen or so bullets," explained Levi flatly. "We're under orders not to collect the fallen for transport home if they aren't mostly whole, sir."

"Understood." Clines sighed, pocketed the tags and the thumb drive, and he looked to Erwin. "They're bringing your bag off of the chopper. Please follow Captain Levi's orders as advised, and don't do anything to make yourself a target. Good luck to you, Mr. Smith."

"Thank you." Erwin couldn't take his eyes off of Levi. Perhaps he was losing his mind, and he was just inserting this man into the profile of the one from his dreams so that he could stop wondering what he really looked like. For the second time, he found himself thinking that the stubble on Levi's jaw seemed out of place and unlike him...which was ridiculous. He'd never met this person before. How would he know what was fitting for him and what wasn't?

Levi noticed his stare as one of Clines' soldiers dropped off Erwin's duffle bag at the blond's feet. The small captain narrowed his eyes at Erwin, and once Clines and his men boarded the chopper and took off, Levi spoke.

"What's your issue? You're looking at me like you're about to propose, or something."

Embarrassed, Erwin averted his gaze. He hadn't realized he was staring at Levi _that_ hard, but he somehow knew that this man was prone to sarcasm, so maybe it wasn't as overt as Levi made it sound. "I'm sorry. You just seem very familiar, to me."

"Tch. I'll let this one slide and chalk it up to jetlag." The captain reached up to slide his fingers beneath the dog tags hanging around Erwin's neck, issued to him along with the set of uniforms he'd squeezed into his luggage. "Erwin, huh? Weird name. Well all right, soldier—and from now on, that's what you are whether you've got any combat skills or not—let's get you settled in."

* * *

Levi could feel Erwin's steady blue gaze on him as he walked him through his squad's current base encampment. Somehow, the man's stare had an effect on him that Levi was completely unused to. He'd been stared at before, both by men and by women. It wasn't that he couldn't handle being eyeballed and admired. Every time he looked back at the blond to ensure Erwin was keeping up with him as Levi showed him around, he found those piercing eyes fixated on him, and it made his stomach do a little flip.

_I know what you mean, big guy. Feels like I know you from somewhere too, but maybe that's because you keep leering at me that way. Christ, didn't your parents ever teach you not to stare at people like that?_

Despite Erwin's apparent inability to be more covert about his interest in Levi, the man didn't seem to be without discipline. He repeated some things back to Levi when the captain showed him key locations, obviously paying attention to his words and making mental notes. Trying to shake off the weird feelings he was getting, Levi focused on completing Erwin's camp orientation.

"There's the shower structure," Levi pointed out, indicating the big, covered tent they'd erected in the center of the camp. "We use solar bags. You'll get one of your own, and you'll be responsible for filling it and hanging it up yourself when you want to wash off. Try to make your showers quick; three minutes if possible. We've got water barrels just on the other side of the shower structure for this purpose, but they aren't bottomless and we aren't going on another run to refill them before we bug out. My advice to you is to let your solar bag sit out all day in the sun, so you won't freeze your balls off when you shower off."

Erwin nodded. "I see."

"Sometimes there's not enough sunlight to do the trick," Levi went on. "In that case, some people heat up a kettle in the kitchen tent and fill their bag half up with it to warm it. If you decide to try that route, make sure you use the coal burning grill. Our gas is limited and it's reserved for cooking meals. Oi, Smith, can you cook?"

"I get by," answered Erwin with a nod. "I'm no gourmet chef, but I haven't given myself food poisoning yet."

"Good. I'll assign you a cooking shift or two, then. Everyone in this squad contributes a fair share of camp maintenance, whether it's cooking, cleaning, latrine duty or firewood gathering. We're a community, Smith. We take care of each other like family. Understood?"

"Yes sir." Erwin got an odd look on his face as he said it, and a tiny smile curved his lips.

Levi tilted his head. It felt odd to him as well to hear this man address him as "sir", and he had no idea why. Perhaps it was because Erwin was actually a civilian, rather than a soldier. Being under Levi's official command during his stay with the squad didn't seem to make a difference. Despite Levi informing Erwin that he would be treated as any soldier in camp, something about thinking of the man as his subordinate didn't seem to click for the captain.

"All right, moving on," said Levi, shaking himself out of the feeling that their positions should be reversed, "There isn't any room in the barracks tent, so we'll get you a single tent and a sleeping bag from supply storage. You're expected to set it up yourself, and you'll be responsible for taking it down and storing it when it's time for us to move out. Lose it, and you'll be sleeping under the open sky."

"Fair enough," agreed Erwin stoically.

His short, direct answers were more eloquent to Levi's ears than any long-winded replies. Levi led him to the supply storage Humvees, and he hopped up into the back of one of them to seek out what he was after. He tossed one of the stowed tent bags out the back of the vehicle to the blond, forcing Erwin to drop his duffle bag hastily in order to catch it. Levi followed up immediately with a rolled sleeping bag, and he was quietly impressed by how quick Erwin's reflexes were. Maybe this guy wasn't going to be such a burden on him, after all.

"Dinner is at 1800 hours," explained Levi, hopping back down nimbly. "No deviation to that. When you've got cooking duty, you'll need to be in that kitchen no later than ten minutes before the estimated preparation time for the meal you'll be cooking. That means if it's gonna take a half hour, you need to be there forty minutes prior to when you expect to have it ready. Personally, I'd make it twenty minutes early, just in case you need to change your menu. Sometimes we run out of things people need for ingredients, so it's better to make sure we've got what you need in stock before locking in a meal plan."

Erwin nodded. "That makes sense to me."

Levi measured Erwin with his eyes, keeping his face expressionless. It was only Erwin's first day here. The captain reminded himself of that fact before jumping to the conclusion that the big blond nerd was going to fit in just fine. He also reminded himself that he wasn't out in the wilds of Maria to scope out potential bed partners. Erwin Smith was more than a little easy on the eyes, but he was way too tall, he was a civilian, and Levi's job was to keep the bastard alive...not eyeball his physique and contemplate what he looked like naked.

_I need to snap out of it and get some perspective. This is war. This pen-pusher isn't out here to be my eye candy or my piece of ass, no matter how horny I am. Shit, I should have gotten laid the last time we passed through Dauper. Should have taken Haji's advice and hooked up with that local guy that was eyeballing me. I guess I'd better wank off tonight after lights' out and get it out of my system._

"Is there something else, Captain?" Erwin asked him politely.

Realizing that he'd just been staring as hard as the blond writer had stared at him earlier, Levi disciplined himself and stiffened. "Just wondering if you'll last longer than the last journalist that came here trying to get a big story," he excused. "I can't guarantee your safety, Smith. My men and I will try to keep you alive, but ultimately what's going to preserve your limbs is your ability to use common sense, do as your told and hunker down out of sight if and when we run into a combat situation. It's practically guaranteed to happen the further into hostile territory we move, got it?"

"Understood," agreed Erwin. "May I ask though; will I be issued any sort of weapons? For self-defense purposes, that is."

"You aren't registered to carry," answered Levi. "Maybe you've shot standard firearms before, but you've had no formal combat training and I can't issue you military-grade iron. You'll get a standard issue survival knife along with the other supplies, but if you ever have to use it against someone, you're doing something wrong. Are we clear on that?'

"Yes sir."

Again, both men shared a puzzled look in response to Erwin's formal reference. Levi said nothing about how awkward it seemed to be for this man to address him as a superior. It was probably because this was a new experience for the both of him. Levi had never taken on the responsibility of escorting a civilian through enemy territory, and Erwin was allegedly green at experiencing war first-hand. Levi reckoned it would balance itself out in time as they both got used to the arrangement—presuming Erwin survived long enough and didn't get re-assigned to a different platoon.

Levi scratched his chin, feeling the prickly growth of two-days without shaving. He felt scruffy, all the sudden. He hadn't worried much about being immaculately clean shaven all the time since being deployed here. For the first two months, he'd tried to keep up a clean-cut appearance. After that, however, he started putting more importance in keeping his squad whole. Still, four days was the longest he'd ever gone without shaving, and he sure as hell wasn't interested in growing a full beard. He'd shave in the morning, he decided.

"This ends the tour," concluded the captain. "You can set up your tent close to mine, if you want. I'd prefer it that way to be honest, because if we get hostiles incoming, I want you close enough to keep an eye on you. Any questions?"

"Actually, I wanted to clear a couple of things up, now that you mention it," volunteered the blond. "As I understand it, the Scout Militia's primary objective is reconnaissance, correct?"

Levi nodded. "Correct."

"So you map out territory and potential strike points for the Garrison Army, and then they come in and hit the areas you've staked out." Erwin had taken out a notepad, and he was scribbling in it as he made his inquiries.

"Yeah. Hence why we're called 'Scouts'. We aren't the wrecking ball, so to speak; we just figure out the best place to swing it to get results. Don't get the idea that makes it safer to be in our regiment, though. If anything, it's more dangerous. If there's a land mine field, we hit it first. If there are insurgents lying in wait on a planned route to the next goal, we're the ones they see first. Think of it like someone walking ahead of everyone else on a frozen lake, testing to see where the ice is thinnest before the rest of the group crosses."

Levi lowered his gaze, a small frown tugging at his lips. "We're usually the first to go down. There are more Scout platoons than Garrison ones scattered over this map because of that. We were the first ones to deploy, and we'll be the last ones to leave."

When Levi glanced back up at his tall companion, he saw Erwin watching him with quiet sympathy lining his blue eyes. The blond had stopped writing to stare at him.

"You've buried a lot of your men, Captain?"

Uncomfortable that he'd given away more than intended, Levi shrugged it off. He glanced back in the direction where a line of fallen soldiers from Recon 17 had been carefully laid out to await transport. The one good thing about the cold temperatures in these parts was the lack of insects, but those bodies were going to start getting ripe in time, the longer they had to lay there.

"I've got a fucking collection of tags, Smith. Some of them are all we have to send home to these fallen soldiers' families."

Erwin nodded slowly, his handsome features somber and his golden hair annoyingly, immaculately groomed. He wouldn't look so fancy after a couple of days out here, but right now, he reminded Levi of some suave, sophisticated agent from a spy movie.

"It must be a heavy burden for you. Somehow, I can easily picture you collecting these men and women's tags yourself. Am I right?"

Levi's brows pinched. This guy was getting annoying with his observations. Levi wanted him to stop talking to him like he knew everything about him, but he supposed paying attention to details and piecing together facts was just a common standard for a writer. They tended to be good researchers. That was how good books were written.

"When I can," agreed the captain. "That will be enough, for now. You need to get your tent set up before the sun starts going down. It gets cold as balls out here at night, and you don't want to be stuck trying to put up your shelter once the temperatures drop. Come on, and we'll pick out your spot."

Levi impulsively combed his fingers through his hair. He was going to need another trim soon. His undercut was growing out. Why the hell did he feel so sloppy around this giant bookworm? He made himself stop primping like some teenager trying to tidy up his appearance to impress someone he liked. Again, he reminded himself that Erwin Smith was his responsibility, and not a potential lay. Fuck, this was inconvenient.

_Next town we'll be stopping in should be Ragako, unless it's been retaken by insurgents. Maybe I'll find a hookup there. It's been too damned long._

Levi wasn't generally one for casual sex, though he sometimes broke that rule when he got restless enough. He never had time for committed relationships, least of all in the past seven months he'd been deployed here. He had his needs like any other man, though, and right now, he could definitely use some cock.

_Might have to settle for pussy instead. Finding guys that swing that way is kind of an art, and it's easy enough to misunderstand signals without a language barrier getting in the way._

God, the last time he'd tried to hook up with a local guy had turned out to be a hot mess. It would probably be easier to find a piece of ass in his own squad, but Levi had a strict policy against fraternizing with his own soldiers, even if it weren't already forbidden by protocol. A court martial for improper sexual conduct with another soldier—subordinate, equal or superior—was the last thing he needed.

Letting Erwin carry his own burden, Levi waited for the taller man to shoulder his tent, tuck his sleeping bag under one arm and pick up his duffle bag. As they walked back through camp towards the command tent in the center, the unbidden thought came to him that there were no rules against sleeping with civilians.

The captain promptly booted the thought from his head.

* * *

-To be continued


	3. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The weather is still holding up so far, so I'm going to go ahead and publish this chapter, now that I've had a chance to give it a proofread. Hope people enjoy it!

_"I met him,"_ wrote Erwin in his dream diary that evening, after setting up his tent and going inside to have a little privacy. _"The corporal from my dreams. He's real, like Nile and Marie. How is that possible, though? I always presumed my friends made it into my dreams because I was subconsciously thinking of them while falling asleep. The other people in these dreams are just characters my imagination created...or so I thought. The corporal, however, is very real. I have a theory that I'm simply attaching his face to the man in my dreams, because his mannerisms and voice are so close. It frustrates me when I start to build up such an interesting character, but can't seem to flesh them out. That has to be the explanation._

_"However, there's more to it than that. I feel like I know this man. I've only just met him today, but already I've figured out that he's fiercely devoted to his soldiers, and he takes it very seriously when he loses any of them. He shoulders it like he believes every casualty is directly his responsibility, even when he wasn't there and couldn't have done anything to save them. Am I losing my mind, or am I just inventing things in my head about him and projecting my assumptions on the man?_

_"His name is Levi, and he's the captain of the Scout Recon squad 16. From what I've gathered from the soldiers in this camp, theirs is counted amongst the longest deployed platoons since our nation got involved in this conflict. There are forty-two Scout Militia platoons currently in operation in these lands. There were forty-three, but one of them recently suffered heavy casualties, and those who weren't sent home got re-assigned to other active squads. Not that this information is pertinent to this journal; I really should be writing it down in my book outline. I'm more tired than I thought._

_"Back to the subject of Captain Ackerman: I wonder if he'll make another appearance in my dreams. Will he truly be the same man, or will I find that my mystery corporal is someone else entirely when his face becomes clear enough for me to confirm the details of his appearance? I shouldn't be so quick to assume I've actually managed to dream about someone I've never met before today. Surely it's only a coincidence."_

Erwin scanned over what he'd written in the journal. He was about to add more, but he shook his head when he heard the dinner bell ring. There really wasn't more to add, at this point. He was behaving like a kid with a crush on someone. The last time he'd felt anything remotely like this was the first time he admitted to himself that his sexual preferences weren't as straight as he pretended. He'd been dating Marie at the time, and the guilt and shame he'd felt when he realized why his eyes kept straying to other boys in the locker room was horrible.

There he was, a model student, popular with his peers, dating one of the prettiest girls in his class, and he was thinking about doing things with other guys that he should only be thinking of doing with Marie. There was one boy in particular, though Erwin could no longer recall his name. He'd been short like Levi, with hair nearly as dark. Every time that boy came into the shower room with him, Erwin was quick to finish up and get out, for fear that he'd get a hard on if he looked at his nudity.

He smirked, shaking his head. Maybe he just had a thing for short guys with dark hair. Hopefully he would have one of those dreams in that historical setting again, see that the corporal was someone else entirely and stop this nonsense before it turned into a full-blown crush. He was too old to be getting crushes, anyways, and Levi couldn't be further out of his reach.

* * *

_Late December, 844, Scout Headquarters:_

"Levi, I've been looking all over for you!"

The corporal glanced up from the task of sharpening his pocket knife. "What for, shitty-glasses?"

Hanji ignored the casual insult, waving a hand dismissively. "Well, tomorrow is Yule, and it's also your birthday! I want to throw you a party."

Levi frowned at her. "I don't want a party. I hate socializing and you know that, by now."

"Oh, pooh!" Hanji sat down on the staircase beside him, unmindful of the warning glare he gave her. "Maybe you hate socializing, but everyone likes presents! You don't have to give a big speech or anything. We already have the big holiday dinner planned, so at least let me raise a glass and toast to you. I promise, it'll be very mild. I just think we should celebrate your birth."

She smiled at him engagingly, her wine-colored eyes lighting up. "After all, you're Humanity's Strongest. Having you in our ranks is something to celebrate."

He grimaced. "Who's calling me 'Humanity's Strongest'?"

Hanji shrugged. "Everyone. It's spread around fast. Civilians, other soldiers, even merchants call you by that title, now. Haven't you heard?"

"News to me," he grumbled. "I never asked for a title. Like I need the added pressure of expectations that come with it."

"Well, you've racked in more unassisted kills than any of us now," Hanji pointed out. "Even the top ranking veterans! You've beaten everyone's records in under a year. It's no wonder people think you're a hero."

"Heroes are selfless fools that put ideals before their own lives," stated Levi dismissively.

He started to resume sharpening his knife, but he stopped as Erwin Smith's comely face sprung immediately to mind. Yes, selfless fools like the commander. A fool that Levi, despite his best efforts to keep hating the man, was growing to respect and admire more with each day. Erwin was exceedingly patient with him, allowing Levi to get away with disrespectful language directed toward him that other soldiers surely would have been remonstrated for.

Erwin not only took Levi's harsh words in stride; he almost seemed to enjoy them. Levi pictured the quiet little smile that so often graced Erwin's lips when he got mouthy with him. At first, Levi thought he was mocking him. He found the man's apparent amusement condescending, and that only made Levi get more profane and disrespectful with him. Then Erwin one day—just recently—admitted to Levi that he enjoyed the banter because Levi was the only soldier under his command that would dare speak to him that way. It officially caught Levi off-guard and made him speechless for all of ten seconds, before he told Erwin that he was a creep and an idiot, and then marched away without another word.

And it made Levi blush. It also confused him. If it were another man, he would have taken it as flirtation. Erwin was a complicated person though, and Levi couldn't trust his own perception of the man's behavior. He also couldn't reconcile the way a smile from Erwin made him feel. He was supposed to despise the commander for the rest of his life, even if he respected him. He wasn't supposed to start _liking_ the son of a bitch, let alone start imagining what it would be like to kiss him. He sure as hell wasn't supposed to be entertaining thoughts of groping Erwin to see if his package was as big as he thought it was.

"Fucker's a glutton for punishment," muttered Levi aloud, without even realizing he'd spoken. He was of course thinking of how much inappropriate delight his commander seemed to take in being verbally abused by him. Did the man think it was cute? Levi could scare most people into submission with a single, snapping glare, but Erwin had the exact opposite reaction to them. He might as well be winking at the big blond idiot.

"Who's a glutton?" Hanji asked. She was the one other person besides Erwin that tended not to cower when Levi got in a mood.

"Doesn't matter," stated Levi, yanking his thoughts off of how Erwin was definitely the hero type, and how majestic and regal he always looked on his white horse, his chiseled features full of resolve and his blue eyes flashing with determination. People would follow that man into hell, and so would Levi. It wasn't really fair.

Hanji studied him with interest, the way she would study a text book or a plant sample she'd taken for medical research. "Erwin wants to celebrate your birthday too, you know," she said slyly. "It was actually his idea."

Levi looked at her sidelong, and his hand almost slipped in the process of running the wetstone over the steel of his blade. "I don't want anything from him."

Hanji sighed. "He thought you'd be that way. That's why I'm the one coming to you with this, instead of him. Levi, what happened to your friends was a sad tragedy. It wasn't the commander's intention for them to get killed on their first expedition. It's never Erwin's intention for any soldier to die, but you know our mortality rates. You can't keep blaming him for Isabel and Farlan."

"I don't," Levi snapped, his voice roughening. He sharpened his blade faster, the scrape of stone on metal ringing harshly in the corridor. "I already cleared that up with him. I blame me for it. Smith had his part in it, but I'm the one that left their sides and went chasing after Erwin. I'm the one that left them alone in that storm. It was because of my arrogance that they died. If we'd stuck together like they wanted, they might still be alive."

The words came tumbling out before he could stop them. Levi had never really said any of this out loud before, never verbally acknowledged the truth. Erwin was the one that pointed out the painful truth of it to him, just as Levi was about to end his life. It made Levi want to hate him even more, because the man had torn open a fresh wound and forced him to have a good look at himself. It would have been so much easier to keep putting all the blame on Smith, but Levi had never been in the habit of lying to himself for long.

"And there it is," Hanji said softly. Her hand settled gently on Levi's nearest, tense shoulder. "A part of you still holds the commander responsible, though. Am I wrong?"

Levi went still again, breath quickening with emotion he couldn't seem to banish. He didn't answer the question, but apparently, he didn't need to. Hanji read it in his burning gaze.

"Erwin holds himself responsible too," Hanji informed gently. "As he does for every man or woman that's fallen under his command. It's a heavy burden, and it's only going to get worse as time goes on. So many commanders have come and gone, Levi. Most of them had their careers ended by death. If it comforts you to think of how probable it is that Erwin will meet that same end some day, that's all right. He knows it's coming. We all do. Shadis is the only Scout commander in history to step down. Chances are, Erwin won't follow his example. He's too stubborn."

"What's your point?" Levi asked, turning his head to look at Hanji full-on. He wasn't liking the direction this conversation was taking. It probably _should_ be of some consolation to him that Erwin would likely meet his end in a titan's jaws, and Levi would probably be there to see it. The thought brought him no joy, though. He couldn't seem to hold onto his rage, and the more he thought of Erwin Smith meeting his end, the more it made him feel sick. Such a beautiful man shouldn't get bitten in two by a titan like so much fodder. Even as the thought went through Levi's mind, he found it harder to concentrate and be coordinated.

"Levi, you've cut yourself!"

Hanji's outburst called it to Levi's attention that he had indeed sliced his hand on his own blade in his last swipe of the sharpening stone. He hadn't even felt the sting, but he had a high tolerance for pain anyway. He looked down at the bright line of red welling on the edge of his thumb, quickly dripping onto the floor.

"It's all right," he insisted, trying to pull his hand out of Hanji's grip when she grabbed it to examine it. "Doesn't even really hurt. Cuts always bleed worse on the fingers."

"Well, we should still clean it and bandage it," sighed the scientist. She put pressure on it with her thumb to slow the bleeding. "Anyways, my point was that life is short, and you should use that energy you're focusing on resentment toward Erwin for better things. He won't be around forever, and whether you believe it or not, he's trying to make things up to you. He worries about you."

"Tch. Why? Because I'm _'Humanity's Strongest'_? He doesn't want to lose his trophy soldier?"

Hanji shrugged, and she urged him to stand up with her so that she could take him to have his cut seen to. "Partly. You're more valuable to the cause than any of us, frankly. That isn't the only reason the commander worries when you do something reckless, though."

"Do tell," he prompted, more curious than he cared to admit.

Hanji smirked at him. "Oh, come on. You don't know?"

Levi sighed. "What am I supposed to know, four-eyes?"

She dropped her voice to a whisper. "He _likes_ you, Levi. I thought if it's obvious to me, it surely must be obvious to you, too."

Levi regarded her suspiciously. "Why would he like me? I've been nothing but a dick to him from day one."

Hanji chuckled. "I guess he likes them feisty. Plus, you're cute when you aren't scowling."

Levi frowned. "Wait a minute...when you say 'like', you don't mean..."

Hanji rolled her eyes. "Men. Yes, I mean he _really_ likes you, Levi. I can't believe I have to spell it out."

Levi swallowed, and he felt the blood rushing to his face. Was that why Erwin always looked at him like he was doing something adorable when he ran off at the mouth? Maybe his perception wasn't as off as he thought it was. His heart was pounding in his chest, and his mouth was going dry. "You're shitting me."

"Don't believe me, if you don't want to." Hanji guided him into one of the medical supply rooms, and she started cleaning and bandaging Levi's cut right away. "I'm just telling you what I've observed. Don't worry, though: Erwin will never act on it. From what I understand, the man is the world's worst at romance. Just ask his last girlfriend."

Levi's mouth compressed. That was right; the last lover Erwin was with was a woman. Maybe he was just a dabbler when it came to his interest in the same gender. If that was the case, it was best to keep a wide berth of him and not encourage this alleged attraction. Levi himself had "dabbled" with the opposite sex before, but he'd decided long ago that he favored men. It sounded like Erwin Smith was the opposite, and Levi's feelings for the man were conflicted and confusing enough as it was.

"There, all better," declared Hanji, having finished doctoring his little injury. "So what do you say, Levi? We don't have to make a big deal out of it, but we would all like to at least wish you a happy birthday. Humor us, won't you?"

Levi got up from his seat on the bench she'd directed him too, and he walked out of the medical storage and into the hall with her. He sighed. "I guess if it's already a special occasion, I can deal with a little toast. Do what you want."

He stopped in his tracks when a familiar, tall form came around the corner up ahead of them. Hanji stopped as well, and Levi's gaze locked with Erwin's as the commander approached them, also coming to a halt. Levi willed his cheeks to stay cool as he gave the man a curt nod of greeting.

"Commander," said the corporal softly.

Erwin nodded back, his icy blue eyes never drifting from Levi's. "Corporal."

Hanji cleared her throat in a subtle reminder that the two men weren't the only people present. Erwin finally looked away from Levi to regard her. "Good morning, Section Commander Hanji."

She grinned knowingly. "Morning, Erwin. Well, I'd best get moving along. My research isn't going to conduct itself! I'll see you later, Levi."

"Wait—"

Hanji was already making her exit, leaving an uncommonly flustered Levi behind, alone with the man they'd just been talking about. Levi looked up at Erwin, and then he looked away. "So..."

Erwin seemed likewise awkward, a flash of uncertainty revealing itself in his gaze. "So," he repeated, no help in the least.

Levi pressed his lips together. Why did _he_ have to be the one to break the ice? "Four-eyes says she wants to do a birthday thing for me tomorrow while the dinner shit's happening."

Erwin's mouth twitched briefly, as if from amusement. Again, Levi wondered what the man found so appealing about his thug talk. "I see. Are you in agreement with that?"

Levi shrugged, and he leaned back against the wall and folded his arms over his chest. "Guess so. As long as nobody makes a big deal out of it."

"I'm sure it will be brief and discreet," remarked Erwin.

He stood around for another moment, and when Levi said nothing else, the blond didn't press him for further conversation. Erwin checked his pocket watch. "Well, I've got rounds to make and reports to fill out. Have a good day, Levi."

Levi nodded, not budging from his spot. That cotton mouth was back again, and it was a struggle for him not to swallow to try and work some moisture back into his mouth. He watched Erwin pass him and continue on, and just as he was about to relax and let himself breathe, the commander stopped. Erwin half-turned to look back at him, and Levi's gaze latched onto the man's lips as Erwin spoke once more.

"By the way, Levi...how old will you be? We have no year listed under your date of birth."

Levi was quite aware of that, and he was frankly surprised that the subject hadn't come up before now. Soldiers were expected to provide as accurate a date of birth as possible for their records, and while he was sure he wasn't the only one of them that had no definitive answer, most of them at least provided an estimated year.

"I don't know, to be honest. I think I'll be around thirty, but time's hard to tell when you're growing up in the Underground. Never bothered trying to count the years." He shrugged. "Of course, bastards born to whores don't usually get a birth certificate."

While Erwin didn't provide one of those subtle smiles in response to Levi's candid reply this time, neither did he seem offended by his word usage. "I see. I can just put down 814 as your year of birth. We'll round it off as thirty, for official records if nothing else."

Levi nodded. "Sure."

Erwin's gaze swept over him. "I must say, you look more like you're in your twenties to me."

"Assign whatever age you want to me," said Levi, refusing to show any sense of flattery over what most would consider a compliment. "Doesn't matter. Twenty-five or thirty-five, I'll still kick titan ass."

This time, Erwin did smile. "Of that, I have no doubt. Thirty it is. Good day, Corporal."

"You too," Levi said softly, and then he did finally move, because he needed to put his back to Erwin before the man could see the flush creeping up his neck. He blamed Hanji for planting the idea in his head that Erwin saw him as something more than a subordinate or a comrade in arms. The two of them parted ways, and Levi had a lot to think about for the rest of the day.

* * *

_Present day, Northern Maria:_

Levi awoke with a frown. He pressed the backlight on his wristwatch to check the time. It was an hour before Reveille, of course. He always seemed to wake up before the day's duties were scheduled to start, provided he could sleep longer than three hours, anyway. He sighed, and he bent his left arm and cushioned his head with it, staring up at the ceiling of his tent. He'd done it again...dreamed about that time period. He'd dreamed about Erwin Smith, too. Maybe he'd dreamed about him before and just couldn't remember it. That made no sense to him, though. He only just met him the day before. Levi didn't believe in psychic encounters or mystical things. He believed in what was real and solid and touchable.

But Erwin Smith was all three of those things. He was there in Levi's camp, just one tent over from Levi. Probably either typing away on his laptop or sleeping like the dead. Probably the latter. Levi decided that Erwin was probably a sound sleeper, unlike himself. He could move quickly when roused from slumber if the situation demanded it, but Erwin had no trouble getting to sleep at night and staying that way until it was time for him to wake up. Levi envied that, and then he realized he was assigning sleeping patterns to a man he hardly knew.

"That dream, though," whispered the captain into the darkness. It had been so vivid. He'd felt like he was actually there, and Hanji's appearance in it made that impression even stronger for him. It wouldn't be the first time he'd seen Hanji in his dreams. The medic—assigned to a different squad now—showed up in his dreams all too often...and most of them took place in that distant time period.

So, his birthday in this dream world fell on the same day as his birthday in reality. It made sense. Dreams were a result of the subconscious mind, so of course Levi's birthday would be on December 25th. He could easily imagine Hanji trying to celebrate it with him, too. She'd done the same thing last year, when they were both taking on extra training to prepare for deployment to Maria.

Hanji was probably Levi's only real friend, and for a moment, he stopped wondering over Erwin's appearance in his dream to wonder if Hanji was still okay. The last he'd heard, she was stationed deeper into the mountains further north and to the east. He hadn't gotten any news of any other scout squads coming under fire besides the 17th Recon. Like his own, Hanji's squad was more of a platoon now, two squads merged together under one command. More wounded were being sent home each day, and more funerals were being arranged. As such, it was necessary to consolidate troops when numbers became too thin in any given squad due to fatalities and soldiers being too wounded to stay in service.

"So where are you, shitty-glasses?" pondered Levi softly. "Wonder what you'd think of this?"

It was fitting and unsurprising to him that the Hanji in his dream was apparently a match-maker. It wouldn't be the first time she'd tried to get Levi to hook up with someone. The last time they'd been in the same place at the same time together, she'd urged him to find a warm body to sleep with. That was the night he misread that young local guy he was interested in and gotten such a flustered reaction from him when he tried to proposition him. The guy hadn't run away screaming, but he obviously wasn't looking to sleep with Levi as the captain first assumed.

Levi's face burned at the memory. Fucking Hanji, he blamed her for that. She'd gotten a few drinks in him, pointed out a few choice possibilities amongst the civilians and told Levi he could probably bag any one of them he wanted, man or woman. He'd gone along with it because he figured he could die any day, and he might as well get laid before that happened. He hadn't tried to seduce anyone ever since. Being fairly reserved as he was and not terribly interested in making a habit of casual flings, the rejection bruised Levi's ego enough to discourage him from even trying again.

That line of thought brought him back to Erwin Smith, and he started slipping his free hand beneath the covers without even thinking of it. Levi thought back on the dream, and he wondered if Smith was gay in reality...or at least bi. That he was thinking about him that way again served as a reminder to Levi that he'd intended to spank the monkey last night to ease some of his tension, but had forgotten to follow-up. He again thought that maybe it was time for him to consider finding a hookup in the next town they passed through, if only to satisfy his baser urges for intimacy with another person enough to keep him from doing something stupid.

"Hmm. Erwin Smith," sighed Levi, his hand moving subtly beneath the winter blankets covering his body. He didn't usually jerk off to thoughts of any specific person, but what the hell? There was no harm in it. Smith didn't need to know, and as long as Levi didn't go screaming his name when he came, nobody else in his platoon would have a clue, either. What he did with what little free time he had in the privacy of his own tent was nobody else's business.

Levi kept telling himself this as he shut his eyes and imagined himself doing all manner of erotic things with the big blond nerd close by. His imagination fired up all too easily, like he'd done this very thing before and his body and mind had been eagerly awaiting doing so again. The lust he felt was strangely familiar to him. It didn't feel like basic sexual desire. There was a sense of longing to it, like it was something he'd wanted for years, rather than something new to him. Erwin's height didn't seem like such a big deal to him as Levi imagined himself undressing the writer, kissing, licking and sucking every inch of him. It was flowing naturally for the captain, and frankly, it was better than watching porn. Hot breath, pounding hearts, masculine noises of mutual pleasure, big, warm hands on his body.

"Shit," groaned Levi, falling into it completely. His hand started moving at a furious pace, and despite the chill in the air, he broke into a sweat. His imagination had never been this good before. His fantasies had never come to him so easily or vividly. It didn't take long at all for him to get off, and for Levi, that was unusual.

* * *

"Sir, Commander Moss is on the horn for you," informed Gabriel Leeson as soon as Levi stepped out of his tent.

The captain straightened up, holding a toiletry bag in his left hand containing his bath and shaving products. Levi sighed, wondering if he was ever going to get the chance to tidy up before his platoon broke down camp and moved on.

"All right, I'm coming."

He followed the man he'd assigned as his squad leader when his group increased in numbers. It was necessary to have a second-in-command once the number of soldiers under his authority increased. So far, Leeson was doing a decent job as squad leader. The true test would come the next time they had real opposition to deal with in their duties. Levi caught a glimpse of Erwin stepping outside of his tent and stretching, and he made himself keep walking, tuning out thoughts of what he'd done while thinking of the blond just a half hour before.

* * *

Erwin interviewed a few soldiers and took down their names before breakfast. He'd seen Levi disappear into the communications structure before he could ask the captain what he should be doing around camp on his first day. Deciding it would be wise to just wait for Levi to have a free moment, he got started on his documentation. He met a young woman named Ellen, who was fairly tall, toned and wore her dark hair in a pixie cut. To his surprise, he learned that she hailed from Mitras just like himself, and they had a brief discussion about home while he was speaking with her. Ellen was due to complete her tour in a couple of weeks, and she admitted to him that she was excited to get out of Maria and return home to her family. She also seemed to have a bit of a crush on Captain Ackerman, which really didn't surprise Erwin.

He also discovered how loyal Levi's soldiers were to him. Each person he talked to expressed their admiration and respect for Levi. Each one was willing to lay down their lives for him. This also came as no surprise to Erwin. Just as he was obviously devoted to his people, they were equally devoted to him. Some of the things he was told about Levi's skills in combat might have come off as a bit exaggerated if it had been anyone else, but Erwin had no trouble believing in the sincerity of these men and women's accounts of their captains bravery and prowess.

After making rounds throughout the encampment and chatting with several different scouts, Erwin spotted Levi again. The captain was coming out of the shower structure, freshly washed, groomed and dressed in a change of winter camouflage. Aside from the colors pinned to his uniform, there wasn't much of a difference between his military attire and the other soldiers. Still, Levi seemed to wear his clothing differently than everyone else. Erwin was at a loss to explain it, and as the captain came nearer, the writer forgot about that observation in the face of another one.

Levi was clean-shaved, and he looked even younger than Erwin first thought. Gone was the stubble of beard growth, leaving the small man's pale features smooth and bare. His skin looked absurdly soft, and it rang another bell of recognition in Erwin's mind. If he hadn't seen the man with stubble before himself, he might have thought Levi wasn't capable of growing facial hair, looking at him now. The captain must have had access to a hair dryer, because his raven locks were dry and shiny in the early morning sunlight, looking as soft to the touch as his face.

When Levi came up to him and stopped before him expectantly, Erwin remembered himself and where he was. He felt acutely embarrassed for staring at the other man like some love stricken teenager, though he tried to excuse it on the fact that he'd had his third dream about Levi in a row, the night before. He'd finally seen him clearly enough in the dream to confirm his identity, and now that he was seeing him in person again, Erwin realized that his imagination hadn't just fired up and glorified what Levi looked like when he was cleaned up.

"Getting orientated?" pressed Levi.

"Yes," agreed Erwin, finding his voice with some difficulty. Levi smelled good. He couldn't tell if it was his aftershave, the soap or shampoo he'd used or just Levi's natural scent when he wasn't grimy. "I was hoping to run into you, Captain. It occurred to me when I woke up that I have no idea if there's more that you want me to do around camp than take up culinary duty now and then."

"So what, you just wandered around aimlessly?"

Levi's gray eyes became further hooded by sleepy lids, giving the impression that he was sleepy. Erwin instinctively knew better, thought. That wasn't an expression of boredom on the captain's face right now. It was a deliberately calm expression meant to hide irritation.

"No, I most certainly did not," corrected Erwin. "I interviewed some of your soldiers, learned more about the situation here. I also assisted with loading some fuel barrels into a humvee, and I did a trash patrol around the perimeter."

Levi's eyes briefly widened a bit, the only change of expression on his face. "So you're proactive about contributing something. That's good to know. You might as well start breaking down your tent after breakfast."

Erwin frowned, puzzled. Why would Levi require him to break down his tent each day, only to have to erect it again before nightfall? Maybe he was just trying to give him a hard time because he was a civilian. "Already? Am I meant to do this every day?"

Levi reached into his insulated uniform jacket to procure a pair of shades, which he propped on his face. "We'll be moving out by this afternoon. Better to have all your shit packed up and ready sooner, so you can help tear down camp for our departure. We're heading deeper into the mountains on the orders of my superiors. Word has it some insurgents have been flooding into one of the towns we recently liberated, and we need to collect information to relay back to the Garrison army concerning the matter. Buckle up, Smith. You're probably going to be in for more research material for your writing than you bargained for."

"I knew the possibilities of encountering a firefight when I took on this project," assured Erwin, feeling a rush of adrenaline. It was exhilarating, and it was familiar to him from some of the dreams he'd had. He didn't feel a sense of fear as any reasonable man in his position probably should have. Instead, he felt a kind of battle readiness, an almost eager willingness to put himself in harm's way for something he believed in. A shiver went through him as he recalled the times he'd felt this sensation in his dreams, his mind forming a mental picture unbidden of huge, monstrous forms bearing down on him and his companions. Yes, gunfire was frightening. The threat of death was very real, and yet compared to some of the things Erwin had seen in his dreams, being caught in a firefight seemed relatively minor.

"What's with that creepy smile?" Levi was frowning at him, his brows tightening over the rim of his sunglasses. "This isn't some video game or movie you'll be watching safely on your television screen at home, blondie. This is war, and people are going to die right in front of you, whether in this mission or the next. You'll be splattered with their blood—probably some of your own, too. Don't take this shit lightly, or you'll end up leaving this country in a body bag like some of my men have."

Erwin took the admonishment stoically, sobering at the cold reality of what Levi was saying. He hadn't meant to smile. That sometimes happened when he got an adrenaline rush like this, whether before a fight or after narrowly avoiding a traffic accident. It came on so much stronger at the thought of facing combat though, and he knew it wasn't appropriate at all for him to appear so happy about it.

"Forgive me," he said as respectfully as possible. "It's just nerves. I have a strange habit of smiling when something makes me anxious."

Well, it wasn't a total lie. He was anxious, but not in the way he probably should be. He wasn't about to admit to Levi that he was eager to experience the liberation of an imperiled town, eager to participate in what he thought of as protection of the innocent.

Levi's hard look relaxed somewhat under the explanation. For a brief second, Erwin thought he saw a flicker of sympathy in those youthful features. He couldn't see the man's eyes behind the shades to be certain of that, though. "Just remember what I told you. Stay out of the open, stick close to soldiers and do what you're told. If we're lucky, we can do this recon mission without alerting the opposition and getting caught in a physical conflict. If not, leave the fighting up to us and stay low."

Erwin did something in response to Levi's order that had the man raising a brow at him, and had Erwin mentally kicking himself. He gave the captain a military salute that was far outdated, and might not have ever been authentic in history. With one fist planted up-facing over his heart and the other at his back, Erwin stood straight and tall before the raven-haired scout. It just seemed natural to him, though their positions should have been reversed, according to Erwin's intuition.

_And isn't it strange that the military branches in my dreams are all more or less entitled the same as the ones in our reality? I just wish that I could remember more details about them. Even their basic functions are similar to the ones of the waking world._

"You are a fucking weird man," stated Levi, shaking his head. "If you're gonna salute, do it like my soldiers do. You stand out less, that way. I don't even know what the hell that was you just did."

Erwin deflated a bit, until he realized something. Levi seemed shaken. He could be just imagining things again, but the blond thought he detected a quiver of uncertainty in Levi's voice, so faint and subtle that it would have probably been lost on most. He did as Levi suggested, offering the captain a modern salute with his hand flat across his brow line, as was the universal standard for all modern military branches.

Still shaking his head, Levi turned on his heel and walked away without another word.

* * *

"What _was_ that?" Levi asked himself after retreating to his tent. He needed to compose himself. It had been like being struck by a bolt of lightning to see Erwin Smith give him that odd salute. He could picture himself doing the exact same thing, with Erwin, Hanji and several others at his side. Levi combed his fingers through his hair, grimacing as he struggled to piece together where that sense of Deja Vu originated from. They were in some kind of chamber together, facing a group of men wearing similar military garb with different symbols patched onto the sleeves and the back of their jackets. A unicorn, a pair of entwined roses, and a pair of black and white wings branching out from each other.

The third symbol was the one that grabbed Levi's attention the most. He narrowed his eyes, and he found himself easily picturing Erwin Smith wearing a long, green cloak with that exact symbol on the back of it. He could picture him with the hood drawn, dropping down from somewhere as if coming in for a landing from flight. There was darkness, and smoke. The glint of a thick, silver blades clashing together, reflecting in Erwin's vivid blue eyes.

_"Stop. Take a look around you. It's over."_

Levi's eyes went wide, and he placed his hands flat against the surface of the small desk in his tent, leaning over to catch his breath. He could practically hear Erwin's voice saying that, but what was it in reference to? There was a girl...young, small, with red hair in pigtails. She was struggling in the restrictive hold of two people wearing uniforms like Erwin's. There was a young man too, with sandy blond hair and a lean build. Levi couldn't see their faces clearly in his mind's eye, nor could he recall their names. He knew they were his friends, though.

But he didn't know them from this life. He'd never seen them before. The confused images kept flashing through his mind, faster and faster. Erwin standing over him, with an endless, cavernous roof expanding as far as the eye could see. Cracked walls of old buildings in various states of neglect. Hollowed out cheekbones of sickly pale people with empty eyes, bereft of hope and vitality. Where was this? _When_ was this? Was he going out of his mind? Levi had held it together for this long, and he knew it could still be a year or longer before he was granted leave to go home, provided he lived that long. Was he cracking now, of all times?

This was no dream. He was wide-awake. Levi couldn't blame this on his sleeping mind going into auto-pilot and giving him wacky nightmares. This felt like a memory, fuzzy though it was. It was like when he replayed events he'd witnessed since this war began, recalling the men he'd lost so far, the bloodstained dog tags he'd collected from the fallen to ensure that even if something kept him from getting their remains back to their families, he could at least do this much.

His head started to spin. He kept seeing flashes of Erwin, and they made no sense. The man was always dressed in either the uniform with the wing emblems, some kind of old fashioned formal wear or plain clothes that looked like something you'd see people wearing a few centuries ago. He'd seen Hanji in that same kind of uniform before, and he'd worn it in his dreams as well.

"What...the fuck...is this?" gasped Levi, shaken.

He saw Erwin atop a sleek white steed, just like Levi's dream self had pictured him while he was slumbering. Erwin standing tall and strong on the branch of an impossibly huge, ancient tree, staring down at something happening on the ground beneath him. There was steam rising up all around him, and a splash of crimson struck him in the face and began to sizzle like it was boiling hot. Erwin didn't move or react; he just kept staring. Levi couldn't focus on what it was the blond was looking at. The scene in his mind skipped again before he could clarify anything, and the next thing he witnessed was seeing Erwin carried into a building on a medical cot. His right arm was missing just below the shoulder. The medics had bandaged the stump and were working frantically to keep Erwin from losing more blood.

Levi started to pant, overwhelmed by powerful emotions that he wasn't prepared for. Rage, vengeance, helplessness. He could do nothing for his commander. All of the titan slaying skills in the world couldn't bring Erwin's arm back. All that Levi could do was support the man and carry out Erwin's orders as he always did.

"This isn't...me," protested Levi, seeing in his mind's eye a reflection of himself in a cracked mirror. It certainly looked like him, though a bit more haggard. The Levi in the mirror's eyes looked older somehow, quietly haunted. Levi wondered what those eyes had seen, even as he tried to pull himself out of this seeming identity crisis.

"Fuck," cursed the captain, and he dug out the keys he kept on him to unlock the top drawer of his desk. His hands shook as he jammed the key in the lock and twisted it. He yanked the drawer open, and he reached in for the medication bottle he kept stored in there. He'd only taken it a couple of times before, and neither of those situations compared to what he was going through right now. Feeling a little jittery was a far cry different from having what he considered a psychotic episode.

"Use only as directed," he muttered, reading the instructions on the label out loud. Well, it said to take one or two as needed for anxiety. Levi shook a few out into his palm, dropped all but two back into the bottle, and popped the tablets into his mouth. He set the bottle down and he detached the water canteen he kept on his belt, rinsing the medication down as quickly as possible.

Levi didn't understand why this was happening to him. He couldn't logically blame it on Erwin. The guy hadn't even touched him. Still, the dream he had the night before and the visions assaulting him now hadn't happened until after Smith arrived in his base camp. Seeing Hanji now and then in some vague, barely recallable dream was no big deal to Levi, because he knew her and he'd worked with her. He'd had some random dreams about other people he knew as well, but this went far beyond that.

"Captain?" called a familiar voice from outside his tent.

Levi groaned low in his throat. Not now. He couldn't handle looking at Erwin right now. He couldn't pretend composure when he was in the middle of fucking hallucinating shit that had never happened. Some veterans had flashbacks, but that wasn't what this was.

"What do you want?" Levi called as evenly as he could. He was dizzy...needed to sit down.

"I've disassembled my tent as you suggested," answered the blond. "You never showed up to breakfast, so I thought I would check on you."

Levi frowned severely. What? He'd missed breakfast? But he'd only been in his tent for a few minutes!

"Captain Ackerman, are you all right?" persisted Erwin, concern now plain in his deep voice.

No, he wasn't all right. He'd somehow lost at least a half hour in what felt to him like only moments. Levi swallowed, taking a deep, calming breath. It would pass. Whatever the fuck this was, it would pass. Stress, lack of rest and over-thinking were the most logical culprits. Hanji always said that people could start having delusions if they went for long enough without proper sleep, and she should know; she ended up tripping like she was on acid once after staying up for three days in a row.

Just as Levi was about to tell Erwin to piss off and stop worrying, the man boldly pulled open the tent flap and ducked inside. Levi glared up at him, straightening up in an effort to look composed. "Did I give you permission to enter my tent, asshole?"

He might as well not have said anything, for all the acknowledgement Erwin gave his cross statement. The worry in that bright, azure gaze deepened as the tall writer looked the smaller man over, and Erwin spoke in a controlled—yet solicitous—voice. "You're as white as a sheet."

Levi parted his lips to bark a demand at the brazen giant, but then his knees started to buckle. Suddenly, Erwin's arms were around him, supporting him and keeping him upright. The contact was a shock to Levi's system. Had he been thinking Erwin was way too tall? What he felt as that strong, towering form molded against his spoke a different tale entirely. The man fit against him as if made for him, unlikely though that seemed with their size difference.

_I'm not going to fucking faint like some swooning goddamned princess._

The thought tumbled through Levi's head even as his ears started to ring. He looked up at the man holding him so closely, staring down at him with such concern, and he uttered one last, salty protest. "Damn you, Erwin Smith. This is all _your_ doing, you fucker."

Levi saw the confusion spasm over the writer's handsome features, and then he blacked out in his arms.

* * *

The looks Erwin got when he stepped out of the tent carrying the platoon's captain in his arms like his bride were almost comical. He didn't care what kind of impression people got, though. He had no idea what happened to Levi just before he checked in on him, nor did he understand a word of what the smaller man said just before losing consciousness. All manner of terrible possibilities began to swirl through the blond's active mind as he called out for a medic. Levi seemed fit and healthy up until that moment, so a sudden and violent case of flu symptoms or infection didn't seem likely. It couldn't be food poisoning, because Levi hadn't even had breakfast yet.

Malnourishment was the most pleasant of the possibilities raging through Erwin's head as he followed a woman that called out to him urgently, carrying Levi with him into the medical tent that she indicated. Levi had accused Erwin of doing something to him. Assassination attempts did happen at times on both sides of this conflict. Agents could get planted into opposing ranks. What if someone had poisoned Levi, and the captain thought it was Erwin? That might explain what the man said to Erwin just before passing out. Maybe someone put something in his water or on his clothes to cause this sudden illness, and Levi drew the conclusion that it was Erwin and he was some kind of enemy spy.

"Lay him down on the cot," instructed the woman that had guided Erwin into the medical tent.

Erwin gently did as he was instructed, keeping his eyes on Levi the whole time as he moved aside so that the woman and a young man with a medical badge could look the captain over. The color was returning to Levi's face, and his breathing was already returning to normal. Erwin waited silently as they checked Levi's vitals and pupil responses, stifling the anxiety he felt as best as he could. It didn't feel like he'd just witnessed the collapse of a man he'd only known for a day, but someone dear to him that he'd known for a long, long time, someone he'd been separated from and didn't even know it until recently.

Erwin couldn't spare time to ponder the nature of his dreams or the connection they seemed to have with Captain Levi. All that currently mattered to him was the man's well-being.

"What was the captain doing when you found him this way, sir?"

Erwin tore his gaze off of Levi to look at the male medic and answer him. "I'm not sure what he was doing before I went inside, but I found him inside of his tent, leaning against his desk. He was looking very pale, and he collapsed shortly after I entered."

The two soldiers glanced at one another, and the man nodded toward Erwin while addressing the woman. "Escort Mr. Smith outside. Make sure he has some company."

The woman nodded, and she approached Erwin. "Come with me."

Erwin didn't fail to notice the way her hand was resting on her pistol. His eyes flicked from the weapon to her face, searchingly. "Am I under arrest?"

She skirted a definitive answer. "You were the last person to see him before he was in this condition, sir. We have protocol to follow, so just cooperate."

"I don't believe this," sighed the writer. "Why in the hell would I seek out medical attention for him if I was trying to do him any harm?"

"Just do as your told, please."

Deciding it would do no good to resist, and would in fact likely hurt his credibility if he did, Erwin allowed himself to be escorted out. He didn't protest when the woman ordered another soldier to cuff him, and he maintained his patience. He was a newcomer here, and he wasn't one of them. It was their right to take precautions, and considering all of the questions he'd been asking people since his arrival, Erwin supposed he could understand their suspicion.

* * *

-To be continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Levi: "I never panic."
> 
> Levi: *starts having flashbacks about Erwin and panics*
> 
> Erwin: "Help! My bae...er...the captain has collapsed!"
> 
> Soldiers: "You're under arrest, Smith."
> 
> Erwin: "...you can't be serious..."


	4. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since it's flowing so well and we aren't having any electric problems, I decided to keep uploading. It's going to slow down a bit after this one, as this is the last pre-written chapter I had and I'm also working on the next chapter of another fanfiction. Thanks so much for all the kudos and reviews so far!

Levi awoke later that morning, and he was surprised to recognize his surroundings as the medical tent. Someone had drawn the curtains around his cot for his privacy, and he could hear the activity of people coming and going. With a little grunt, he sat up and rubbed his bare arms. They'd taken his shirt and jacket off, leaving him in his sleeveless undershirt. There was naturally a chill in the air, and the captain looked around until he spotted his removed garments neatly folded on a nearby stool. He slipped into his shirt and tried to remember what had happened. He was feeling rather sedate now, thanks to the medication he'd taken.

_I was in my tent. Smith gave me that weird salute, and it freaked me out. It's like he triggered me or something. After that I..._

Oh. He'd started having a breakdown. Levi remembered the confusing jumble of imagery that had been going through his head just before he took his meds and Erwin showed up. Were they delusions? Dreams he'd had in the past that he suddenly recalled all at once? Had he just inserted Smith into them because they bombarded him just after he'd interacted with the man? That seemed likely, to Levi. They couldn't be actual memories.

The privacy curtain opened, and Levi looked up in the process of putting his jacket on to see one of the medics standing over him.

"Captain, how do you feel?" asked Corporal Graham. "You probably shouldn't be on your feet right away, sir."

Levi was forced to agree with him, but he stubbornly got up anyway. "I'm fine now. What happened?"

"Well sir, you blacked out." Graham looked at him with concerned green eyes, he took his military cap off and brushed dark blond bangs away from his forehead. "That writer guy brought you in here. He said he found you looking pale in your tent and you just collapsed. They're having him watched right now, awaiting your orders."

Levi's brows lowered. "Why are they having him watched? Is that how you treat people that get medical treatment for your commanding officer?"

"No sir, not me," the medic hastened to explain, "but since Mr. Smith was the last one to see you before you passed out, they didn't want to take any chances. They had us rule out toxins being the cause for your condition and—"

"When have you people ever known me to be a drunk or a drug-head?" demanded Levi.

"N-never, Captain." The boy was looking quite nervous, now. "But we've never known you to collapse that way before, either."

Levi breathed a sigh, and he sat back down on the cot. "All right, fine. What's the prognosis, then? All I know is I got dizzy, couldn't seem to get enough air and then I woke up here later."

The corporal looked around, and he answered Levi in a low voice. "We're pretty sure you had a panic attack, sir."

Levi stared at him, at a loss. He didn't panic. Not even the time when the guy right next to him was unfortunate enough to step on a live land mine, and pieces of him struck Levi in various spots as it went off. He didn't panic when his supply pack got hung up on something in the jeep he was riding in and he had only seconds to escape the vehicle before a streaking RPG missile launched from enemy forces impacted.

Those were heat of the moment situations, though. Levi couldn't recall ever before having his senses overloaded by his own mind, the way they'd been earlier. He chose not to mention that detail. It was a singular experience, and with any luck it wouldn't happen again. If it did, he might have to consider the possibility that he wasn't fit to lead his platoon any longer.

"What could cause that? Lack of sleep?"

"A lot of things, Captain. Fatigue can be a factor, yes. Usually it's stress related, and that's pretty common for anyone with your responsibilities. Plus there's mental and emotional trauma. That's why some of our medics are trained in counseling, sir. A lot of our men and women take advantage of it, when they can. If you don't mind my saying so, maybe you should consider it, too."

Levi didn't see how bitching and moaning to someone about the things he'd been through would help, but the mention of stress and fatigue made him feel a little better. He could just be overly tired, pushing himself too hard. Maybe he wasn't losing his marbles. He was feeling too relaxed to take umbrage at the medic's suggestion that he seek counseling.

"Did you give me anything while I was out?"

"Medication-wise? No, sir. We were waiting for you to wake up to ask if you've already taken anything before offering something to you. So have you taken anything?"

"Yeah," admitted Levi. "A couple of those pills prescribed to me. Can't think of what they're called, but it's in my med file."

"The Xanax, right?" guessed the corporal. "Well, that sure as hell shouldn't have caused your problem."

Levi shook his head. "I took it after I started feeling weird. Guess it was a little too late."

"I see." The medic nodded. "I'll put a note down. How do you feel now, Captain?"

"I'm okay. Whatever it was has passed. I think I just need to get some food in me and get a little rack before we head out. Don't go spreading it around that you think I had a panic attack, got it?"

"Of course not," assured Corporal Graham. "We saved you a plate from breakfast, if you want me to heat it up for you."

Levi almost declined. He wasn't feeling dizzy any longer, but he didn't really have much of an appetite. He couldn't neglect his body's basic needs though, especially if his earlier episode was brought about by improper nutrition or a lack of rest.

"Sure, heat it up for me."

"All right. Uh, Captain, can I just make one last suggestion?"

Levi shrugged. "Feel free."

The medic took a deep breath. "Well, you're probably meant to take that medication regularly. Maybe you should try taking one a day for a start, instead of waiting until you feel anxious."

Levi gave the man a level stare. "You know I won't do that. I can't afford to let it dull my senses while I'm adjusting to it."

"But if you start off slow—"

"No," insisted Levi. He had herbal tea he could drink more of to ease some of his tension. He didn't need to get in the habit of taking prescription drugs, even if they worked faster.

"All right, sir. We can't force you."

* * *

After eating his breakfast, Levi remembered what the corporal had told him about Erwin. Feeling more like himself, the captain left the medical tent and went to the holding tent. Right now, they had no war prisoners being held in camp. The ones they'd apprehended recently got transported to a holding facility the week before. Erwin was currently the only occupant caged up in the guarded tent structure, and Levi clicked his tongue with irritation as he went inside to find the blond reclined on the cot within his holding cage.

"Let him out," instructed the captain to the soldier standing guard.

Erwin heard him, and he lifted the cap covering his eyes to look up at Levi. He sat up, and he looked the smaller man over as Levi stood waiting for the guard to comply.

"Sir, have they tested you for toxins yet?" asked the guard.

"He didn't fucking poison me," explained Levi. "Shit, why would the guy take me straight to a medic if he was trying to kill me? Use your head."

"I asked them the very same thing," mused Erwin with a smirk. "How do you feel, Levi?"

"Captain!" Snapped the guard with a scowl. "You will not address him as common while you're in this platoon."

"Captain," agreed Erwin mildly. "Excuse me."

Levi had to admit that he was impressed by how stoic the writer was. Most people wouldn't be so calm about being thrown in the clink the day after arrival, just for being present during a medical collapse. He just wished the bastard would stop staring at him so intently, as if trying to telepathically communicate with him. Strangely enough, Levi could sense Erwin's amusement underlying his calm. What a fucking weirdo.

"Let him out," said the captain again. "He didn't do anything. The medics gave me a clean bill of health. It was just fatigue."

The guard saluted Levi, though he seemed a bit disappointed over the decision. Some people were just like that; they'd been living through hell during this conflict, and along comes this pretty boy civilian thinking he can fix everything with some published text under his author name. All the reporters and journalists seemed to think that way at first, but they all learned differently in time. Levi understood the guard's attitude, even though he wasn't going to encourage it.

Erwin got up off the cot, and he smoothly ducked as he stepped out of the cage, avoiding bumping his head. "Thank you."

"Christ, are you always this fucking polite?" Why it rankled him so much, Levi couldn't say. He just couldn't shake this feeling of resentment toward this man, and it had nothing to do with Erwin's business here and everything to do with Levi's reactions to him.

"No, not always," answered the blond. "But there's a time and place for being polite. I think that offering my thanks to you for clearing up this misunderstanding is only proper."

"Whatever. Go help take down the shower structure. We're behind schedule. As soon as air transport gets here to collect the fallen, we're moving out."

* * *

Erwin believed he was in good shape. He thought it would be fairly easy to keep up with the men and women in Levi's regiment. He worked out regularly at home, he ate right and he'd gotten as rested up for the journey to their next destination as possible. However, once the encampment was fully dismantled and the platoon got mobile, he realized that weight lifting and crunches weren't enough. He hadn't been expecting to have to march. He wasn't expecting to have to carry his duffle bag on his back while doing it, either. They'd allowed him to put his laptop case inside one of the Humvees, but as there were more people than there was space on their limited vehicles for everyone to ride. Like everyone else except for those recovering from minor injuries, Erwin had to wait his turn for the chance to ride in transport.

_I should have focused more on cardio before taking on this project._

Indeed, his legs were beginning to feel leaden, and as he and the scouts put more distance behind them, Erwin's breath became labored. To his chagrin, none of the men or women on foot around him seemed to be having any difficulty. Erwin didn't complain aloud, though inwardly he was vowing to soak his feet in hot water and collapse as soon as they reached their next stop. He hadn't even been told if they were going to break camp somewhere between their point of origin and Jinae, where they were reportedly heading to.

His boots crunched in the snow as they gained altitude and started to cross frozen ground. Erwin nearly slipped and fell at one point, and he was mortified when he grabbed at the guy in front of him to steady himself and nearly brought him down with him. He looked around with a muttered apology when the soldier snapped at him to watch what he was doing, hoping that Levi wasn't around to see his slip-up. He wasn't. As they trudged on, Erwin's thoughts turned to his latest dream about the captain, and the events that led to Levi getting bumped up from corporal to captain in rank. In addition, Levi was granted the right to form a team of his own choosing to lead.

 _Special Operations,_ thought Erwin to himself, keeping his focus divided between putting one foot in front of the other—and trying not to trip or collide with anyone—and the events he'd seen in his mind while napping in his holding cell.

_Is it just mere coincidence that I've dreamed of him becoming a captain in this past time period, or am I still just making up a story in my own head and incorporating Levi into it for inspiration?_

He'd barely had the chance to scribble down what he recalled of it before his assigned duties required his attention, but this dream was actually clearer than any of the previous ones. Erwin replayed it in his head as he marched, wanting to commit as much of it to memory as possible.

* * *

_Mid-Februray, 845, Mitras District:_

Levi leaned back in his chair as he, Erwin and Mike sat down at the table they'd chosen. The corporal was watching Erwin with an odd look in his gray eyes. Levi rested his arm on the back of his chair, crossing his legs. He looked casually at rest, but Erwin knew that the man could spring to action quick as a whip if anything became amiss. Mike was silent, as was typical of him. All three of them were dressed in formal uniforms, having come from the capital's MP headquarters. Erwin had just been named formally in front of the Brass as the new high commander of Survey Corps. For a while the three of them were silent, and then the waitress brought their drinks to the table.

"So, now they've all publicly acknowledged you," Levi said, picking up his glass and holding it the same way he usually held his teacups. He swirled the amber liquid in it, watching it curiously before sniffing at it. He made a face. "Smells like sewage."

"It's port," Erwin reminded him, unable to stop his lips from quirking in response to Levi's reaction to the smell. "Haven't you ever had any before? You could have chosen something else, when I offered to buy the first round."

Levi shrugged. "I'm willing to try something new. Does it feel any different, being announced like that in front of the monarchy and those merchant pigs?"

"Not exactly." Erwin took a sip of his own drink. "I was already named commander by the people that matter the most. That ceremony was simply a show for political reasons."

Mike nodded. "The wealthy love their social gatherings."

Levi frowned. "I don't get it. Seems like a waste of time and money. The cost of that ceremony could have easily been sunk into the scouting legion's budget, where it might do some good."

"True, but in participating in this, we've made an impression on the people whose money we're going to need in the future. Like it or not, the Survey Corps relies on the funds from these people in order to keep operating."

"Glad that's over with," grunted Mike. "How did Hanji get out of coming?"

"She has important research to conduct, and she couldn't have made the journey here in time from her location." Erwin looked between his two companion, and his eyes lingered most on Levi. The corporal looked quite dashing in his ensemble of white, with brass buttons on his jacket and gold trimming lining his uniform. He'd been surprised that Levi agreed so readily to attend, with hardly an argument at all. As their eyes met, Erwin saw that strange look come over Levi's face again. He tilted his head, wondering what that unfamiliar expression was all about.

"I'll be back in a minute," said Mike tactfully, looking between the two of them. "I've got to take care of some business."

Erwin glanced at his friend briefly as Mike got up and headed for the men's restroom. Unlike many taverns in less wealthy districts, this one had indoor plumbing and bathrooms, rather than outdoor latrines.

"Well Levi?" said Erwin in softly once they were alone, "what's on your mind? I don't think I've ever seen you look at me quite like that, before."

Levi averted his gaze. "Like what?"

Erwin was at a loss to describe it, because of how unfamiliar it was to him. He settled for comparison to the way he was used to the smaller man looking at him. "Like you aren't wondering if my guts are the same color as other men's."

Levi stared at him, blinking slowly. "Do I usually look at you that way?"

"Yes." Erwin lifted his glass to his lips again, and he paused to add: "at least, that's how I perceive it at times."

"I don't look at you any differently than I look at anyone else," insisted Levi, but ironically, he was looking away again. He squirmed a little in his seat, and he picked up his glass again. "I don't smile at people. You know that."

Erwin nodded. That much was true. Hanji just recently said she would have thought Levi's face was paralyzed, if she didn't see him glare and scowl so much. For the most part, Levi's youthful face tended to bear that impassive non-expression that made him look bored at all times. Not tonight, though. There was a faint softness behind the way he'd looked at Erwin a few times.

"I'll give you that," agreed Erwin, "but something is different, tonight. I can't blame it on alcohol, because I saw you drinking only tea at the ceremony."

Levi hesitated. He glanced at Erwin, flicked his gaze away, and then downed the entire contents of his drink in three gulps. He grimaced and wiped his mouth off, and then his cheeks gained a charming hint of pink as he met Erwin's gaze.

"I'm proud of you, all right?"

Erwin choked on the sip he'd started to take of his port. He snatched up the napkin folded on the table, and he covered his mouth with it as he recovered. "Excuse me?"

"Proud," repeated the smaller man. "Of you."

Erwin coughed a little, and when he was sure he could speak again, he voiced a question. "Why? I haven't done anything significant since my promotion yet."

"Bullshit," disagreed Levi. He set his empty glass down, and he looked the commander in the eye. "You've done a lot, you just haven't had the chance to set it all into motion, yet. You stood there on that podium looking like some...some hero, putting on a show for those rich bastards because you can see past the petty shit and keep focused on your goals. You dwarfed all of them with your presence, and...fuck...never mind."

Now it was Erwin's turn to flush. Gruff and unschooled though it was, Levi had just paid him the most flattering compliment he could remember ever getting in his life. To hear this man say such things to him after all of the bitterness, all of the pain and all of the tension they'd started out with, was truly a gift. Impulsively, Erwin reached across the table and laid a hand over the corporal's.

"Levi...thank you."

Levi looked down at the bigger hand covering his, and another flash of expression crossed his pale face. He looked—briefly—slightly panicked. Realizing that he'd just made a romantic move on the man without consciously intending to, Erwin withdrew his hand and collected himself.

"Speaking of plans for the future," he said in a more controlled tone. "There's something that I would like to implement for the regiment, and it directly involves you."

He gestured at the waitress, pointing at Levi's glass meaningfully. While she went off to fetch another for the corporal, Erwin further explained his thoughts. "We have some unique opportunities before us, Levi; opportunities that would be a shame to waste. I have command of the Survey Corps, but I feel that in order to truly move forward, I need something more. What I need is a true partner, one that I can trust not only to share my vision, but keep me in check when I get ahead of myself. I need someone at my side who can ground me, keep my head out of the clouds. Someone who isn't afraid to speak their mind, but who can be relied upon to trust in my intuition. In this matter, I have a proposal for you."

Levi had gone completely still. His mouth went slack for a moment, and Erwin could see him gathering his thoughts as he took in what he'd just said. What came out of the corporal's mouth then was far from the response Erwin had been hoping for.

"Have you fucking _lost_ it?"

"I...haven't even explained..."

Levi leaned closer to the now flustered commander, speaking in a low voice as he speared Erwin with his pewter gaze. "Oi, you want someone to ground you? Okay, how about slowing down with the bold ideas before you take it too far. You've gotten this much support from the Brass because you're innovative, but—"

"Wait, Levi," Erwin requested, feeling the topic spinning rapidly out of control. He'd expected questions and perhaps reluctance from Levi at first, but the man hadn't even heard him out yet. "I think we should finish talking about this before you give me your answer. This is a good opportunity for you, a chance to truly shine and make the best use of your skills."

Levi had his lips parted to speak again, but he paused when Erwin spoke the last sentence. Confusion flashed in his eyes, and he sat back. "Just what were you about to ask me, anyway?"

Now suspicious, Erwin watched him with interest. Perhaps Levi wasn't shooting down his idea just because he thought he was coming up with too many ideas, too fast. "What did you _think_ I was trying to ask you?"

The waitress came back with Levi's fresh drink, and he waited for her to take away his empty glass and leave before answering. His voice dropped low again. "It sounded like a fucking marriage proposal."

Taken aback, Erwin ogled him. "The frightening thing is that I can't honestly tell if you're being serious or facetious."

Levi sighed, and he _almost_ looked contrite for all of two seconds. "Let's just review what you said to me just after grabbing my hand and staring into my eyes, shall we? Think really hard on it, and tell me what impression you think most people would get. I can wait."

It took Erwin a moment, because in his mind aside from taking Levi's hand like that and thanking him, he'd done nothing inappropriate. Then he reviewed his own choice of words in his mind as Levi suggested, because he knew that sometimes his passion could get the better of him; hence why he desired Levi's council so much. Some parts of his own speech stuck out more than others for him, and Erwin's eyes went blank with the realization of why Levi got that impression as he replayed his words in his head.

_"We have some unique opportunities before us."_

_"What I need is a partner."_

_"I need someone at my side who can ground me, keep my head out of the clouds."_

_"I have a proposal for you."_

Erwin dropped his forehead into a palm. "By the walls, it _did_ sound like a fucking marriage proposal, didn't it?"

"Heh. You think?"

Having only heard that little huffing sound of amusement from Levi a couple of times since meeting him, Erwin lifted his head to look at his companion. He couldn't look away. Levi was smiling at him. It wasn't a broad smile, nor was it toothy. It was subtle...little more than a smirk. It revealed to Erwin that Levi had dimples, something that he'd never realized before. It was the sweetest goddamned smile Erwin Smith had ever seen.

"So what _were_ you trying to ask me?" Levi said. His cute little smile smoothed out as he sobered, cocking his head inquisitively.

Erwin nearly blurted that he had no idea. He felt like he'd just seen the sun for the first time, and the clouds had moved in to blot it out again. For a moment, he wished he _could_ propose marriage to the man. He kicked the ridiculous thought to the curb, reminding himself of his original intention.

"I want to create a special operations squad within our ranks," explained the commander. "This would be an entirely new division within the scouts, composed only of the most elite titan slayers available. As you can imagine, it would be a small squad. It requires a leader. Not just a section commander, but someone with exceptional gifts and instincts. I need you to be that person, Levi. You will be my right-hand man, still ultimately deferring to me in the field, but otherwise granted autonomy over your own soldiers that no regular squad leader has ever had."

Now Levi was acting more as Erwin had anticipated. He narrowed his eyes at him as though suspecting him of a trick, and he held his gaze for a few heartbeats before answering. "You're serious."

Erwin nodded, all traces of amusement over the earlier misunderstanding vanishing. "Yes, I'm very serious. You are the only one that can do this, Levi. I knew when I heard about you and saw you in action myself that we needed you, but at the time, I didn't know exactly what I wanted to do with you if I managed to succeed in your recruitment."

Now the familiar bitterness crept back into Levi's tone. "Use me as a weapon, right? Seems pretty straight forward to me."

"You're much more than a weapon, Levi," stated Erwin sincerely, "and I'm sorry that I ever treated you as otherwise or thought of you that way. I'm asking you to help me free humanity, not as my subordinate, but as my partner."

The commander dared to smirk at Levi. "And I suppose in a way, that might make us seem like a bit of a married couple. It is a sort of marriage, truth be told, this partnership I propose to you. It's just not the conventional sort between a man and woman involving a shared bed."

"I see." Levi frowned a little, revealing a hint of conflicting feelings. "If I wouldn't be a section commander, what rank would I be? How would you get the Brass to go along with this?"

"You would be captain," answered the blond, "and I think once I explain it to the higher ups, all it will take is a look at your record thus far to convince them to go along with it. What say you, Captain Levi?"

Levi took a swallow of his drink, his mouth twisting into a little grimace again in reaction to the flavor. "I say you're one crazy son of a bitch, but you've got balls the size of cannon rounds and the brains to match. What the hell, I'm in."

Erwin smiled. As he'd said before: it wasn't marriage per say, but it was a match made in heaven for their goals.

* * *

_Present day, south of the town of Jinae:_

"Oi, Smith, are you gonna make it?"

Erwin snapped out of his thoughts on his latest dream at the sound of that voice and the poke he felt in his right bicep. He turned to look at Captain Levi, and he almost looked right over the smaller man's head. He kept forgetting how short Levi really was, due to his intense personality. His breath came out in cold, vaporous puffs in the frigid air. He'd lost track of time. Levi's gaze was shadowed by the military cap he wore on his head, peering up at him doubtfully. Erwin's cheeks felt frozen; he wasn't used to prolonged exposure to this sort of cold. He nodded at Levi, lacking the breath to answer verbally. He was a bit surprised to find Levi marching alongside him. He hadn't even realized he was approaching, and he'd half-expected him to ride the whole way.

"I told you a few seconds ago to hop into the back of a transport and get warmed up," Levi said. "Did you even hear me?"

No, Erwin hadn't heard him. He'd been too busy replaying the dream in his mind and trying to reason out how certain things in reality related to it. "I'm sorry, I was focusing on keeping up."

"Well, you've been on foot long enough." Levi nodded at the Humvee up ahead of them. "We're about to come to a brief stop. Take a piss if you need to, and then get in the back of that transport. You can ride the rest of the way. That's the one that has your laptop in it."

Erwin was grateful for that, and he wondered if Levi would be riding with him. Apparently not, because once he found a bush to relieve himself in and climbed aboard the vehicle, he found no sign of the captain on board. He first assumed that Levi was taking a different transport, but when he looked out the window near the seat he was in, he saw the captain continuing on past on foot with a group of soldiers.

Erwin dug out the fingerless gloves he'd stashed in his insulated jacket, and he replaced the full gloves he was wearing with those so that he could type. He slipped his bag off of his shoulders, stashed it in the corner where he'd stowed his laptop bag. Hoping he'd charged it enough with one of the camp generators before leaving their site, he took out the device and opened it up in his lap. Soldiers climbed in with him, and soon the interior of the vehicle was packed. Some of them watched Erwin curiously as he powered up his laptop and started searching through his files for the documents he was working on to outline his project. Others made themselves as comfortable as possible and closed their eyes for a little rest.

Once the Humvee started up and they got moving, the interior warmed up from a combination of the heater running and the body warmth coming from the passengers. Erwin took his cap off when he felt comfortable enough to do so, and he began to write about the day's experiences and what he'd learned.

* * *

Levi trudged along with his soldiers, and he thought of Erwin and the dream he'd had about him while taking his nap, earlier. It had been a pleasant one, as he recalled, with no drama or angry feelings. They were in a tavern of some kind, discussing the blond's recent promotion to commander of their regiment. Something about it had been odd, though.

_That's right; he'd actually gotten the promotion months before the actual ceremony._

As Levi thought of this, the part of his dream with the misunderstanding came back to him. Unbidden, his lips smiled ever so slightly. It was easy for him to imagine Erwin making a social blunder like that, now that he was getting to know him. The man had a gift with words, but he sometimes seemed to lack common sense. Levi was sure he proofread his own written works and caught things like that before publishing them, but he didn't have the luxury of editing himself when speaking in the heat of the moment.

Levi looked up ahead at the Humvee Erwin was riding in. He wondered if he was warm enough. The blond's cheeks had been kind of chapped from the cold when Levi decided he'd finally had enough time on foot, and the captain felt an odd twinge of remorse for drawing out his marching time for that long. Erwin wasn't a soldier. As ripped as Levi suspected the writer's body to be, it wasn't conditioned to endure prolonged exposure to extreme weather or long hikes. He hoped the bastard wouldn't end up coming down ill from it. Smith undoubtedly had all necessary vaccinations before coming here, including flu shots, but one's body could only get pushed so far before something gave. Soldiers still got sick from time to time, and Erwin was just as human as they were.

 _So why can't I see him as anything less than invincible?_ Wondered Levi. Even as he admitted to himself that he was a tad worried, a part of him refused to accept the possibility of Erwin coming down sick.

_The crazy bastard's had his arm chewed off and that didn't even slow him down._

Levi came to such an abrupt halt that the soldier behind him bumped into him. The man apologized hastily and moved around him. Standing still in the snow with his troops passing him up, Levi wore a dumbfounded look on his face. He didn't even know where that thought had come from. It just popped into his head out of the blue, but now he couldn't shake the image of a gigantic humanoid creature snatching Erwin up off his horse like he was nothing more than a chew toy. Even with his arm caught in the maw of that thing, Smith yelled at his soldiers to keep going. Eventually he got free of the beast, but only because it bit his arm cleanly off from below the shoulder.

Levi could remember that day clearly, though he couldn't understand how it was possible. Obviously it didn't happen for real. Erwin had both of his arms intact. He was sure that neither of them were prosthetics. Why could he so easily picture Erwin with a stub from the bottom of his right shoulder down? Why could he picture himself cleaning and dressing it for Erwin, and bringing the man food, encouraging him to eat to keep his strength up?

_He's done something to me. I don't know what or how, but ever since the big geek showed up in my camp, he's been invading my thoughts and my dreams._

Levi didn't even have a big imagination. He could get by whenever he needed to visualize things for tactical purposes, but he was no daydreamer or novelist. It was crazy how all the sudden, he was making up all of these fictional scenarios about a time period long gone and a man he'd just met. He fell back into marching formation, reminding himself to keep up with his squad. He didn't need his preoccupation to cause him to fall behind and make himself an easy target for possible insurgents hiding in the area.

Without consciously doing so, he picked up the pace and he jogged up to the back of the vehicle Smith was in. He pulled aside the canvas covering the back as he hopped up onto it, and he stuck his head in to look for the source of his troubles. Erwin was sitting near the front of the vehicle, with his laptop open and his fingers busily typing away. He was wearing a pair of black, rectangular reading glasses. Levi blinked. He didn't know Smith wore glasses, but the sight of it struck him as familiar. He'd seen him with glasses on before, only the ones he remembered were old fashioned, with brass wire frames. Levi wasn't a fan of glasses on most people, except for shades. Somehow, though, Erwin wore them well. He looked smart and elegant in them, even sexy.

"How's it going in here?" Levi blurted, trying to shake his attraction to the sight of the man in those stupid glasses.

Erwin looked up, pausing in his typing. "It's coming along well, Captain. Thank you."

Levi nodded, noticing the hot beverage thermos at the blond's feet. He must have had some coffee or coco to warm himself up. That was good. The flush from the chill had faded from Erwin's face, though his cheeks still looked a bit chapped.

"You should put some lotion on your face," suggested Levi. "Otherwise it might start peeling. Next time you come out into the cold, wear the face scarf you were given."

Erwin touched the accessory mentioned as if on impulse. It was around his neck where it belonged, tucked into the collar of his winter jacket. "I'd forgotten all about it," he confessed.

Levi snorted. "Tch. Of course you did. You need to keep your head out of the clouds and down here with reality, Smith. If you get frostbite from being careless, you're shit out of luck."

Erwin looked mildly chagrined. "Of course. I'll try to be more careful, Captain Levi."

The captain nodded, and he closed the canvas back up and hopped down off the back of the Humvee. Why he'd even bothered to baby the man, Levi couldn't guess. Erwin was a big boy. He could take care of himself. But Erwin had a tendency to neglect his own needs when he was focused on a goal. Levi's eyes softened as he again imagined himself feeding the big blond. It brought with it an unfamiliar feeling of warmth that Levi could not identify, because he'd never felt it for anyone else before.

Levi Ackerman was not used to loving someone, and had he been able to figure out what the emotion he felt actually was, he might have fallen into another panic attack.

* * *

_Stohess, the year 850, late March:_

"Captain, the commander is awake now, if you want to see him."

Levi looked up from the reports he was reading, and he hesitated. Erwin had been in a coma for over a week since the loss of his arm. Levi had been in to see him every chance he could, talking to the unconscious man about their plans, the events that happened while Erwin was out, and everyone's hopes that Erwin would recover soon. Now that he was conscious again, Levi almost felt nervous. There was a tinny flavor of fear in his mouth that he never experienced, even in combat. What was he scared of?

_I'm afraid he's not going to remember who he is. I'm afraid that what I'm going to find in that hospital room won't be Erwin Smith, but some stranger._

"Is he lucid?" Levi inquired to the female scout that reported it to him.

She nodded. "He's been asking for you. He's confused about what date it is and he can't remember everything about what happened to him, but he's otherwise doing fine."

Levi nodded, and he took a slow breath. He wouldn't know how bad it was until he got off his ass and saw for himself. "All right, I'll go and see him. See to it that these reports get properly filed while I'm out."

She saluted him. "Yes sir."

Levi left the military building he was in, having chosen to conduct his official business there because it was the same district they were keeping Erwin in. He had a stable boy fetch his horse, and he rode swiftly to the infirmary. Eager yet trepidatious about talking to his commander again, he arrived at his destination all too soon. Dismounting, he tied his horse at a hitching post, gathered his cloak about him and walked up the steps to the main entrance. A medical staff member directed him to a hospital room on the second floor, and Levi hesitated once he stood before the door.

It took a lot of courage for the captain to push that door open and enter the dimly-lit room. Gas lanterns flickered warmly on the walls to provide some light. A familiar but scruffy-looking figure sat up in the single bed inside. He was wearing his reading glasses and of course, reading a book. Erwin looked up at the sound of the door shutting, and his whiskered face relaxed into a smile at the sight of Levi.

"There you are," stated Erwin simply, closing the book.

"Yeah, here I am." Levi walked to his side slowly, taking in the bandages wrapped around Erwin's bare torso and the stump where his right arm once was. It was a good thing Erwin was left-handed. Levi thought that was a strange thing to be considering at a moment like this, but part of him refused to accept the possibility of Erwin retiring. He would need to be able to write, if he was going to carry on his duties as Commander.

"How is everyone?" pressed Erwin after a moment of shared silence. "How is our campaign going? They say I've been out for over a week."

"Yeah, you were in a coma." Levi pulled up the visitor stool, and he sank down on it. Keeping his eyes on Erwin and silently reveling in how like himself the blond seemed, Levi cocked his head. "What do you remember?"

"We were rescuing Eren from the Armored Titan that had taken him, along with Ymir." Erwin glanced down at his stump with a frown. "Then an abnormal came out of nowhere...or at least, I believe it was an abnormal. It had me in its jaws before I even knew what was happening. All I remember after that was yelling at our men to push on, no matter what."

Levi smirked. "Balls of brass. You didn't even blink when that thing snatched you up."

"My mind was solely on our mission," excused Erwin with a shrug. "I've been told that Eren was successfully retrieved, but not much else."

"Yeah, we got him," confirmed Levi. "We got the titan that bit your arm off, too. After that, our priority was getting you back behind the walls for medical treatment before you could bleed out."

Levi sighed, looking away. "A lot's happened while you were out, too. We've lost a lot of people, and Krista Lenz turned out to be a fucking monarch, with a claim to the throne. Her real name is Historia Reiss, and we've been talking about figuring out a way for her to ascend to the throne and take over."

Erwin blinked with surprise. "Well, that's...unexpected. What else have I missed?"

Levi explained the details as best he could. Nearly an hour passed while they discussed new developments and their options. When he had given Erwin enough details to bring him up to date, Levi stopped talking and looked the blond over. "What do you want to do next, chief?"

Erwin sighed. "Right now, I think the first order of business for me is a bath and a hot meal." He sniffed himself, his aristocratic nose wrinkling a bit. "I'm sure they sponged me off as well as they could, but the results are somewhat unsatisfactory."

"Yeah, you smell pretty ripe," Levi agreed without apology. A thought came to him unbidden, and he felt his cheeks heat up. "I could help you bathe."

Erwin's vivid blue eyes met Levi's. "You'd do that?"

The captain hesitated briefly, and then he nodded. "Yeah. I can look away until you're submerged in the bathwater. Can you stand up on your own, or should I fetch a wheel chair for you?"

Erwin tugged the covers down with the intent of swinging his legs over the side of the bed, and both men went abruptly still. He was completely nude under those sheets. So much for Levi avoiding an eye-full. He had now seen more of Erwin Smith than he'd ever bargained for, and his eyes definitely liked what they saw. The rest of him did, too. Levi hunched in his stool in an attempt to hide the bulge now growing between his legs. Fuck, was this man ever hung. Levi had always suspected his junk would be complimentary to Erwin's height, hand and foot size, but he wasn't expecting to get visual confirmation so abruptly.

_I'm fucking staring. I should look away._

His stupid eyes refused to obey his mind's command, and Levi heard himself speak as if from far away. "Nice package, Erwin."

The commander's features went pink beneath the beard growth covering his lower face. "I didn't realize I was completely nude."

Levi snapped out of it, and he hastily looked away. "I'll...go get you some pants. I had a trunk of some of your things brought when they put you in here, in case you woke up and needed them."

Erwin covered back up. "Thank you, Levi."

The captain hopped up from the stool, and he started to head for the door until he remembered the trunk in question was in the room with them. He turned around abruptly, avoiding looking at his superior as he sought the item out. It was over by the window. Levi marched over to it with purpose, almost looking like he was heading into battle. He took the key that he'd been keeping on his person out of its pocket, and he inserted it into the lock to open the trunk. He selected the first pair of pants he found folded neatly within it, which were semi-dressy, tan slacks. He grabbed a white button-up, long-sleeved shirt to go with it, and as he carried the items over to the bed and set them down on it, his gaze went to Erwin's stump. The right sleeve was going to dangle, with nothing to support it.

"Shit."

"What is it, Levi?"

The captain's troubled gray eyes met Erwin's, and for once, he worried about his choice of words, and he practiced some care with how he answered. "The shirt's not gonna fit right. I mean, the right sleeve."

Erwin looked at the shirt, and he nodded. "I suppose not. We can figure it out, Levi. I think for now I'll just put on the pants. The shirt can wait until after I've bathed. I'm sure with your help, we can make it work."

Levi heaved a sigh, stricken with a surge of emotion that he wasn't prepared to deal with. His gaze went to Erwin's healing injury, and he spoke his thoughts without censoring himself. "Sucks about your arm."

Erwin smiled gently at him.

"What?" demanded Levi. "Why are you smiling at a time like this? There's nothing funny about it."

"I'm smiling because you're being so kind to me," whispered the commander, "and you aren't treating me like an invalid. You're treating me with dignity, though I'm now a cripple and unfit to continue leading as your commander."

"That's bullshit," snapped Levi. "You're not crippled, and you're not unfit. You'll get better and you'll still lead us to victory, just like you always promised. Nobody else can do it, Erwin. Nobody else has your stones, or your mind."

"Hanji is a very capable leader," reminded Erwin, his soft smile never fading. "You should have more faith in her."

"Never said she isn't a good leader," corrected Levi sullenly, "but she's not you. If she was here right now, she'd agree with me."

"Your loyalty is a treasure to me," informed Erwin. "Have I ever told you that?"

Feeling the change in the air between them, Levi's heart started to pound faster. Erwin wasn't looking at him like a soldier right now, and Levi wasn't looking at Erwin like a superior. They were staring at one another like lovers, and the distance between them began to close before Levi even knew what was happening. When his mouth was hovering just inches from the blond and Erwin's hand reached up to cup the back of Levi's head, the captain stopped.

"What are we doing?" whispered Levi.

In a rare moment of uncertainty, Erwin shook his head. "I'm not sure." He hadn't removed his hand from the back of Levi's head. His fingers combed through the smaller man's undercut, stroking lovingly. "I've been entertaining some very unprofessional thoughts about you for some time, Ackerman."

Erwin said Levi's last name in a caressing manner, like he'd been wanting to speak it for a while. Given that they'd just recently got confirmation of his surname, Levi supposed that made sense. He himself had repeated it out loud in front of a mirror for a while when he found out, trying to familiarize himself with the concept of actually _having_ a family surname.

"Yeah?" Levi murmured. His mouth felt dry. Were they finally going to address the elephant in the room and stop kidding themselves? "I've had them about you, too."

"Then why are we hesitating?" questioned Erwin. He didn't move to finish what they'd started though by the look in his eyes, he desperately wanted to.

Levi felt a chill of disappointment go through him as he reminded Erwin of why they kept their distance. "Because if we let this happen, it won't end with a kiss. You're not just some guy I can get off with and then walk away from, Erwin. I've already given myself to your cause. If I give myself to you this way, I'll lose myself completely. I'm not gonna be able to let you go."

The words had come out in a rush, and Levi was powerless to stop them. They didn't even sound like words he would speak, and yet he meant every one of them. This man could inspire him to do things that Levi would have never expected of himself, and he knew that if Erwin kissed him now, he wouldn't have the will to stop. He'd let the man do whatever he wanted to him, and things would never be the same again.

"Levi," breathed Erwin huskily. There was so much longing in that deep voice, so much passion.

Levi could relate completely with Erwin's expression of feelings. He was breathless with anticipation and want, himself. He hadn't gotten off with anyone for a really long time, and his body was aching for Erwin Smith to be the one to break that cycle of celibacy.

"You could have gotten married," reminded Levi softly. "You could have a family started by now, but you chose humanity over your own fulfillment. This isn't much different, Erwin."

His words seemed to reach Erwin Smith's common sense, and the blond stopped closing in on him with a thoughtful, regretful look on his handsome, scruffy face. "I suppose you're right. This would have a significant impact on our working relationship, whether we try to keep it separate or not."

Levi hated himself for being the cautious one and pointing out the danger of letting themselves go. He wanted Erwin. Witnessing what happened to him that day and realizing that death could come at any time made him finally accept his own feelings for Erwin. It was too late to take it back now; he could see the resolve hardening Erwin's beautiful, blue eyes. Smith wasn't going to back out of this decision.

"Maybe some day," Levi whispered. "If we're both still alive and this hell is over with, we can reconsider."

Erwin nodded. His voice was equally regretful as he took his hand away from the back of Levi's head. "I concur. Some day." He sighed, running the fingers of his remaining hand through his mussed, oily hair. He smirked at Levi almost painfully. "And now I have double the incentive to put an end to the titan threat."

Levi smirked back, though he felt like his heart was breaking. So, this was what it felt like to be in love. He hated it. "So do I."

* * *

_Present day, just outside the town of Jinae:_

Levi got jostled awake by a bump in the road. He was disoriented at first, having come out of the vivid dream that he knew damned good and well couldn't have been conjured up by his lackluster imagination. He wasn't in Stohess, and he wasn't behind a great, walled settlement. He was in the country of Maria, and he had a mission to fulfill. He didn't know where these dreams and visions kept coming from or why they'd started, but he could not afford to let them distract him from reality. Maybe when this was all over, he'd be one of those soldiers that had to take medication for the rest of his life to control delusions brought about by his experiences in service. He fucking hoped not. He'd seen the poor care veterans got when they came back from war wounded, whether physically or mentally.

"Captain, we're approaching Jinae," the driver called. "Should we stop or go straight in?"

"We stop," decided Levi. "We'll handle it like we did the last time; send a group in dressed in civilian clothes to check out the situation before we make a move."

So far, the tactic had served them well in situations where they needed to scout out contested territory without alerting the enemy to their presence. While Marians spoke another language, they weren't physically any different from Sinarians. They varied in race and size, and nobody could tell their nationality simply by looking at them. Blending in with the residents was the key to successfully gathering intel about a place.

Levi climbed out of the Humvee he was in as it came to a halt, and he called his second-in-command over to him. "All right, you're going to lead this scout team. Pick five people to go with you, and get changed into local civilian attire. Don't talk to anyone in town unless you have to. You might know their language, but I'm sure you've got an accent when you speak it that will give you away. Understand?"

"Yes sir, understood."

Levi climbed up on top of one of the vehicles, and he lifted the binoculars around his neck to his eyes. He looked through them to see if he could spot any recognizable opposition in the town. The foliage from the local flora blocked his view, and he cussed under his breath. He squatted down to slap the roof of the Humvee, getting the driver inside's attention.

"All right, let's move it off the road and get everyone out of sight. It's not a good idea to stay on the road while we're trying to be covert."

The vehicle shifted gears, and Levi braced himself and road on the top of it as it pulled off the main road. The rest of the convoy followed. Levi wondered if Erwin was in the same Humvee he'd ridden in before, but he resisted the temptation to check. Right now, he needed to avoid contact with that man. He was too confused about his feelings, unsure of whether they were real or just influenced by the dreams and visions.

* * *

To be continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Erwin: "Levi, thanks for bailing me out. I was getting bored in here."
> 
> Levi: "I didn't do it 'cause I like you. I did it 'cause it was the right thing to do."
> 
> Erwin: "You're so cute."
> 
> Levi: (;¬_¬)
> 
> Random soldier: "Captain, I have the--"
> 
> Levi: "Don't bother me right now. I'm in heavy denial of my attraction to the blond tree."
> 
> Erwin: "OMFG are you telling me we never actually FUCKED? How is that possible? I can't even stand next to him without wanting to jump his bones, and I had every opportunity to do it, but I never TOOK it?"
> 
> Levi: "Shit, all that sexual tension and we never got laid with each other? No fucking wonder we were so miserable. Oh, wait...that time never happened. Of course we never boned...we've only known each other for two days. Reincarnation doesn't exist, damn it."
> 
> Erwin: "We've been totally reincarnated and I'm madly in love with him and want to hug him and squeeze him and pet him and pat him."
> 
> Levi: 눈_눈 "Stop staring at me like that, Smith."


	5. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hmm, what do you know: this chapter flowed faster than the chapter for the other fanfic I'm working on. Hope everyone is enjoying the weekend! (I'm using a different spelling for Hange's name in this, and I try to catch it when I fall back on the usual but I'm sure I miss a few now and then. Don't be too shy to tell me when I lapse! I appreciate people catching oopsies if/when I miss them.)

Unbeknownst to Levi, Erwin was contemplating the exact same dream Levi had. He'd napped around the same time as the captain, though the writer had no way of knowing this. Currently, he was writing down everything he could remember of it in his dream journal.

 _"I think Captain Levi and I were in love,"_ wrote Erwin. He was frowning, still aching inside from the emotions he'd felt during that dream. _"Is it possible that we knew one another in a past life, back in a bygone era? What about the titans? Were they real, or has my mind created them because there needed to be a threat in this story? Titans are supposedly mythological beasts. No evidence has ever been found that they ever existed. We've found fossilized remains of people from earlier civilizations, as well as extinct animals. I've written a book about titans and the theories concerning whether they were fact or fiction. Perhaps that's why I dream of them sometimes. The subject has long been of interest to me."_

Erwin sighed, pausing for a moment before writing more. _"These feelings I get when I see Levi in my dreams...they're too powerful to be purely imagined up. When I woke up from this dream, I almost felt the urge to cry for the first time since I was a boy. This heartache over choosing duty above love is all too real. Is it possible for someone to fall in love at first sight? We've all heard the saying before, but I always thought it was just exaggerated romanticism. Now I wonder if it is indeed possible, and these dreams are just my mind's way of coping with it, trying to convince me that this is old love that's always been there, and I just never felt it before in this life because Levi wasn't around before now._

_"Maybe I really am just insane. Even if I'm not, what am I to do about this? I can't just tell the man I know him from some other life and want to rekindle the relationship we denied ourselves. He already thinks I'm strange enough. Honestly, I don't even know if Levi's tastes run to other men. I'm just assuming things because of these dreams, but he could be completely straight. He could be married, for all I know."_

Erwin paused again as the thought of Levi being completely and utterly off-limits made him feel sick. Not even the biggest crush he'd ever had in his life compared to what he felt for this man, and he hadn't known Levi for more than a couple of days. It was foolishness. It was irresponsible. It was juvenile. A grown man should not be so smitten over someone he just met, and certainly not to the point where he could think of little else besides that person. Erwin didn't think anyone would blame him for finding Captain Ackerman attractive; Levi was, without doubt, a very good-looking fellow. Gruff and crude in mannerisms though he seemed, Levi also wasn't without his fair share of sex appeal. Erwin had seen more than one soldier eyeballing the captain with more than casual interest.

"May I ask you something?" Erwin finally said to the guy seated next to him. He put away his journal as the soldier looked at him inquisitively.

"About what?"

"Is the captain of your platoon married?"

The guy's brows went up beneath the military cap he wore on his head. "Captain Levi? Married?"

Erwin nodded. "If it's too bold a question, I'll understand you reclining to answer it."

"I'm just trying to picture Captain Levi being someone's husband," answered the soldier with a smirk. He laughed softly and shook his head. "Damn, she would have to be something else, that's for sure. I don't think anyone exists that would be good enough for the captain, to be honest with you."

"That picky, is he?" Erwin found himself smiling. It seemed fitting for Levi, and he felt some relief. "So I take it that's a 'no', then?"

The soldier shrugged. "As far as I know, he doesn't even date. I've only seen him go for someone _one_ time since I got assigned to his squad, and that was months ago. I don't even know if they hooked up. Hell, I didn't even know the Captain goes for that."

Erwin raised a brow of intrigue. "Goes for what? Sex?"

The soldier looked around cautiously, and then he leaned in to answer in a whisper. "Guys. You didn't hear it from me, all right? In fact, I shouldn't even be telling you this and I could be totally wrong. Maybe I just got the wrong idea and thought I saw something I didn't, so don't take it as fact and you sure as _hell_ better not go spreading it around."

"I'll keep it to myself," vowed Erwin. He could just imagine Levi's reaction if he found out people were spreading rumors about his private love life. Erwin was just thrilled to hear he wasn't already taken, and perhaps he wasn't a completely lost cause insofar as romance. He doubted he would ever have the gumption to make a pass at the captain even if he could confirm his sexual preferences, but it was nice to be able to fantasize.

* * *

"What do you see, Gabe?" Levi picked up his cell phone when his second-in-command called him, a few hours later. The sun had gone down, and he'd ordered his men not to build any fires. It was bitterly cold and people were hungry, but they couldn't risk signaling enemies that might be in the area. They'd have to settle for cold rations and shared body-warmth, for now.

"We've walked through the whole town, sir," answered Gabriel. "No sign of any hostiles. Either they've already bugged out, or lines got crossed somewhere and we got the wrong information."

Levi frowned. There was no way the insurgents would take over a town and then just leave it without anyone there to keep it secured. That meant that high command got the wrong information. Maybe the name of the town was just off and they got sent to liberate the wrong one. It wouldn't be the first time.

"All right, give me your location. We'll move in and meet up with you."

"Understood, Captain."

Levi hung up the phone, and he looked around at their temporary encampment for Erwin, debating on whether he should leave most of his men here and Erwin with them, or bring everybody. He didn't want his forces divided, though. Just because there wasn't any sign of hostiles here now, didn't mean that they couldn't move in with guerilla teams before his platoon left the area. Be prepared for anything...that was the motto to live by in this kind of situation. Levi didn't intend to be caught off guard again. What happened to Recon 17 wasn't going to happen to them, if he could help it.

He spotted Erwin by a large evergreen, chatting with a man and a woman from the squad. Levi took a deep breath, and then he frowned at his own behavior. Why did it feel like he was about to ask someone to the fucking prom? He was just conveying orders. Nothing to freak out about. Levi blamed that last dream he'd had, blamed it for tricking his heart into feeling something that made no damned sense.

"Smith," called Levi, forcing his feet into motion. His combat boots crunched in the snow, and Levi realized for the first time how cold his toes were. He wanted a hot bath and a warm fireplace. Maybe they could stay at the inn they'd stayed at the last time they were in this town. It was clean enough...cozy and old fashioned. It made him feel at home, actually, which was strange, because he lived in a loft apartment in Ehrmich. His surroundings at home were nothing like this little village they'd be staying in. It was a big city with modern buildings and lots of traffic. Jinae was small and charming, with cottage-style architecture that made one feel like they'd stepped back in time.

"Captain?" Erwin stopped talking to his companions, and to Levi's amusement, he stood at attention.

"At ease," stated the smaller man dryly. He might have thought Erwin was mocking him, but Levi was convinced the man was just trying to be respectful and fit in with his surroundings. He realized something else too; Erwin Smith carried himself like a soldier. Either he was just that good at adaptation, or he'd had some military training he hadn't mentioned yet.

"We're going into town," explained Levi. "The same rules apply. You stick close to me, and if anything come amiss, you keep your ass out of the line of fire and let us handle it. Clear?"

"Clear as crystal, sir." Again, Erwin got that odd look on his face that he always seemed to get when addressing Levi as a superior.

Levi realized that his own face was wearing the same expression, and he schooled it back into an impenetrable mask. "Good. You catch on quick. All right people, let's move out. We'll have a little R and R here for a day or so until I can report back to the higher-ups and get our next mission orders. Remember to conduct yourselves, all of you. We're guests in this town, and we're representing our country. We want these people to be glad we're here and feeling safe with us. Don't harass the locals. I don't care how cute you think a girl is; if she's not interested, you don't push it. Is everyone clear on that?"

"Sir, yes sir," called out several voices.

Levi looked up at Erwin again. With that face, that body and those eyes, blondie could probably bag any girl he wanted. Still, for all intents and purposes he was a member of this platoon now. "Those rules apply to you as well, Smith. Keep the skirt chasing sensible and conduct yourself as a gentleman."

Erwin nodded. "Of course. I intended to do just that, anyway."

Levi wondered if he meant he intended to chase skirts, but he believed Erwin was referring to being a gentleman—at least, that was what he told himself. It bothered Levi to think of Erwin hooking up with someone while they were there, and that irritated him.

_Fuck, just let it go. He's not your fucking boyfriend. He's not even your friend. He's just a tag-a-long journalist that goes for that "Pen is Mightier than the Sword" bullshit. Why are you doing this to yourself, Levi?_

Why, indeed? Once more, the captain blamed it on his dreams. He was tricking himself into feeling shit for Erwin that he shouldn't be feeling. He didn't know anything about the man except that he liked to read and write, and he had some good military instincts. He didn't know what his favorite color was—

_Gray._

What his favorite music was—

_Classical._

What his favorite food was—

_Steak._

Whether he liked to dance or not—

_He does, and he's damned good at it._

Levi nearly clutched at his head. As if it wasn't bad enough that he found Erwin so blindingly attractive, now he had to start assigning favorites to the man, too? Christ, next he'd be plucking the petals off a flower and playing "He loves me, he loves me not" like some lovesick teenager.

"Let's get moving," stated Levi, ruthlessly stomping out thoughts concerning the things Erwin liked.

* * *

Erwin looked around with interest as he entered the town with the soldiers. Civilians quickly went indoors upon their arrival, for the most part. Some didn't, and the looks they got were either mistrustful or hopeful. He wrote in his quick-note journal as he walked, jotting down bullet points to type out later on his laptop, once he managed to get it charged.

_"The people here are frightened. I can read it in their faces and see it in their eyes. I don't know what they've specifically been through since this conflict began. I've heard that insurgents—and sometimes our own soldiers—raid these small towns for goods while passing through the territory. The war crimes don't stop there. They take young women along with the goods, and what happens to those young women doesn't bear thinking about."_

Erwin stopped writing when he spotted a girl around the age of twelve or thirteen watching the soldiers curiously. She was barely into puberty, if she'd reached it at all. Dark curls, wide eyes, she would be a beauty when she reached maturity. A woman that Erwin presumed to be her mother came out of the little cottage the girl was standing in front of. She had the same curly brown hair. She quickly ushered the child through the door and into the house, saying something in Marian that was too low for Erwin to make out.

"Why are you just standing there?" Levi demanded, coming up beside the blond. "Keep moving, Smith. We've got supplies to get and room and board to arrange."

Erwin gave a little start, and he looked at the gruff little captain with contemplative blue eyes. "These supplies," he said softly, for Levi's ears alone, "how do you intend to procure them?"

Levi narrowed his eyes at him. "If you're suggesting we'll take them by force, you're wrong."

Erwin tensed, and he sighed. "I didn't mean any offense. I've heard stories, and I know that desperate times sometimes lead to desperate measures."

"Not dishonorable ones," stated Levi firmly. "Not under my watch, at least. Yeah, we hear stories too about some of the shitty misconduct that's happened since this hell started. You can put your concerns at rest. My men barter fairly for goods and supplies when we need to get them from the locals. We don't cheat anyone, and we don't commit acts of war against civilians. I thought I already made that clear with my warning to everyone earlier."

"You did," admitted Erwin, feeling ashamed of himself. While Levi's expression was impassive, the writer thought that he could detect cold anger brewing behind the captain's hooded gaze. It seemed that Levi took personal offense at the insinuation that he might conduct his business with these people with less than perfect honor. "Captain, when you have a moment, I would like to sit down and talk to you about some of your experiences. You've obviously seen quite a bit during your tour here."

"Later," said Levi in a clipped tone. He glanced around at their surroundings. "I'll answer some of your questions if I've got the time to spare, but first we need to get settled in, and I need to contact my superiors for further instructions."

Erwin nodded. He wished he hadn't said anything to begin with, but all he'd been thinking about was how terrible it would be to have to witness these soldiers mistreating the locals. He was getting more comfortable around them, starting to feel like he could fit in. He didn't want to find out his impression of them was wrong.

* * *

Just as the captain said, his soldiers purchased or traded for supplies. Erwin watched them interact with the locals, and it made him feel better to see that some of the civilians actually remembered Levi's squad and seemed glad to see them. In fact, he saw a couple of soldiers receive fond hugs of welcome from locals that recognized them from the last time they'd passed through. Not all of the residents of Jinae were wary of them.

Levi's second-in-command had already arranged room and board, by the time they made it to the Inn. Naturally, there weren't enough rooms for everyone in the platoon, but the proprietor had a storage warehouse that he offered to them to shelter the rest of the platoon during their stay. Apparently, it was a common arrangement whenever the platoon passed through here. Erwin expected to be staying in the warehouse with the majority of the soldiers, but Levi corrected him as he started to follow them.

"Where are you going?"

Erwin stopped in mid-step, and he looked back at the dark-haired captain with some confusion. Standing on the steps of the Inn's main entrance, Levi was leaning casually against the stair railing.

"With the others," explained Erwin, frowning a little. "Didn't I just hear you say that there are only enough rooms available for the officers in your ranks?"

"Yeah, but that includes you, as well as the wounded. Injured soldiers always get a bed, if it can be arranged."

To Erwin's surprise, Levi reached into his jacket to produce a cigarette. He'd had no idea the man smoked. Then again, smoking seemed to be a habit that a lot of soldiers took up once deployed to contested territory. He supposed he couldn't judge them for finding what stress relief they could.

Levi lit up, cupping his hand over the lighter's flame to keep the wind from blowing it out. He glanced at Erwin, who hadn't said anything yet in response to the surprising offer of his own room. Levi grimaced a little, had a puff and reached into his pocket for his pack. He held it up and out toward the writer, raising his brows slightly.

"Thanks, no," said Erwin, realizing the captain was offering him a cigarette. "I don't smoke."

Levi shrugged. "Suit yourself." He put the pack back. "I didn't smoke either. Still only light up once in a while, unlike some of these other guys. Some of 'em smoke like a chimney."

"I've noticed." Erwin smirked. Interesting how Levi inadvertently echoed his thoughts on soldiers and smoking. "So you took up the habit after deployment here?"

"Yeah." Levi nodded at a couple of scouts that passed by him with respectful salutes, on their way into the building. "Stay out here with us long enough, and you might be begging for a puff yourself. For what it's worth, I hope you've got more willpower than I did."

Erwin hesitated. Levi was making small talk with him, and earlier he'd been so dead-set on business. It was so very in character for this man. He had a gut feeling that Levi had a habit of unintentionally striking up conversation a lot of the time, but he'd seemed like he was avoiding him through most of the journey here.

"It's very thoughtful of you to try and keep your injured soldiers comfortable," observed Erwin. That was another thing about Levi: he was kind to his subordinates, overall. Strict, but very conscious of their needs. This too seemed perfect.

"People heal better when they're well-rested," excused Levi. The street lamp highlighted his fine-boned features, and Erwin couldn't tell if it was his breath fogging the air from the cold, or the smoke from the cigarette. The captain took another drag. "Besides, the temperature's gonna drop even lower tonight. Those sleeping in the warehouse are going to be huddled up together like sardines by midnight. They'll be out of the elements, but it's still going to be cold as fuck."

Erwin smiled. "Then I should thank you for extending the courtesy of a room to me, as well."

"Tch. You're not acclimated to the extremes yet, and you're my responsibility. If you end up with pneumonia, you'll be a complete dead weight and it'll be on me."

Erwin took the gruff response in stride, reminding himself that the captain was a practical man, above all else. He adjusted the duffle bag slung over his shoulders, as well as the laptop bag draped over the left one. A shiver passed through him as a bitter wind passed through the area, moaning as it whistled past structures.

"Let's get inside," Levi decided. He stubbed his cigarette out in the snow, and he put the remainder of it back in his pack. "You look like your nuts are about to freeze off."

Annoyed that he'd been so obvious about it, Erwin merely nodded. He walked up the steps, and he went inside with the captain. He was further surprised when they passed through the common room and went up the stairs, because Levi walked right into his assigned room with him. Erwin turned to regard the man curiously, watching as Levi closed the door behind him. Erwin's heartbeat picked up, and he chastised himself for entertaining the hope that the other man was about to make a pass at him.

"Is there something on your mind, Captain?"

"You said you wanted to talk to me," reminded Levi. "We've gotten as much business taken care of tonight as we can, and I couldn't reach my superiors when I tried to contact them earlier."

Levi helped himself to the armchair in the corner of the room near the fireplace. There was already a fire lit in it, obviously a courtesy given by the staff. The captain relaxed in his seat, and he nodded at the single bed against the wall. "So have a seat. Let's talk."

* * *

Levi wondered why he was doing this. He didn't owe this man the courtesy of answering his probing questions. He didn't have to arrange a room for Erwin, either. He kept thinking about that last dream he'd had, and of how disappointing it had been when he and Erwin mutually agreed not to act on their feelings.

_I know why I'm doing this. It's not so I can answer his questions, it's so I can ask a few of my own and dig up some dirt on him. Maybe if I learn something repulsive about him, I can stop obsessing and ditch this stupid crush before it gets more out of hand than it already is._

It seemed like a perfectly reasonable, convenient excuse. He didn't want to jump right into it though. Erwin was, Levi knew, a very perceptive man even if he was a giant nerd. The guy seemed to have a knack for seeing into him that nobody else had ever matched.

"So talk," prompted Levi at last, once Erwin had set his baggage down and planted himself on the bed.

"I wasn't expecting this tonight," confessed Erwin. He scratched his head, looking the captain over in a somewhat suspicious manner. "I suppose I'll start with asking you what gave you this change of heart?"

Levi shrugged, trying to ignore the effect that gaze had on him. "Like I said: we've done everything productive we can do tonight. Might as well get this over with and satisfy your curiosity while things are slow enough. What do you want to know, Erwin?"

The blond sighed, and he dropped his hand into his lap with the other one. "I suppose we could start with clarification. I know that the media glosses certain things over, and you've been here since we first got involved in this conflict, correct?"

Levi nodded. "Yeah. I started out in Recon 5. We were some of the first Sinian militia to touch down here. What do you know about the details of this war?"

"From what I understand, it began with the northern territories disputing the takeover of their government bodies, resource production and laws by the more powerful south territories." Erwin frowned in thought. "It became a human rights issue as the civil disputes thickened, and Sina moved in to help liberate northern Maria and provide war relief to civilian populations. At least, that was the intention as our society has been told."

"Tch. It started out that way, true enough." Levi sighed, and he crossed his legs. Folding his arms over his chest, he looked out the nearby window. Snow was starting to fall outside, lending a falsely serene picture to the village below. "It did start with good intentions, but war has a tendency to give rise to opportunists. What you said earlier about us re-supplying—"

"I shouldn't have spoken so hastily," Erwin was quick to say, having the grace to look somewhat ashamed. "I know I haven't been with your platoon for long, but you've already demonstrated admirable principles. I want to again apologize for insinuating that you would take advantage, Levi."

Levi's jaw tensed, but not because Erwin had failed to address him by rank. That actually didn't bother him at all. In fact, he rather _liked_ it when the man just called him by his name and spoke to him as an equal. What rankled him was the reminder of _why_ Erwin would assume something like that, and he had to remind himself that it wasn't the man's fault.

"First off, don't interrupt me," chastised Levi. "Secondly, you don't need to apologize for that. It was a legit concern. I'm not sure what kind of stories the media's spinning back home, but the part about some of our own going 'dirty' and practicing some misconduct isn't off the mark. We started out trying to help, sticking our noses where they don't rightfully belong and getting involved in these people's problems."

Erwin waited for Levi to pause before giving further input. "But the enemy didn't give much of a choice, did they? These people needed help."

Levi looked directly at Erwin. "They aren't the 'enemy', Erwin. They're citizens of a nation, just like us, and as far as they're concerned, we're the interlopers and we're interfering with their way of life."

Erwin took a second to let that sink in. "But, they've attacked their own people."

Levi huffed. "Politics. This started due to a dispute between the north and the south. Yeah, the Marian government got too greedy and people rebelled. It got out of hand, and the people of the north were in trouble because the south holds more power. Shit like this is pretty common in human history."

Erwin nodded. "True enough."

The captain sighed. "I can't say we shouldn't have gotten involved. As a serviceman, I've got to stick by my country and the orders I've been given...but it's not as simple as people want to think it is. Now that we're here, we can't just pull out. We've gotten involved, and we've had an influence. If we try to pull out right now, it would just cause more trouble. We've caused a bigger need for our presence by deploying here, because we got directly involved in the conflict instead of just providing some disaster relief. Does that make sense?"

Erwin again nodded. "I think so. Now the northern territories are dependent on us for protection, and our presence here has stirred the hornet's nest further. Am I right?"

"That's one way of looking at it," mused Levi, "but there's more to it than that. It's really fucking complicated. Like I told you earlier: some people are opportunists. I can't give you details because a lot of it's classified, but I'll tell you this much: I've personally rounded up and arrested whole squads for misconduct, in the time I've been here. These people in this town trust me and my men now, but our first time here..."

Levi trailed off, thinking of how terrified the citizens of Jinae had been the first time they'd come through.

"What happened?" pressed Erwin gently. He opened up his laptop bag to procure his device as if just remembering he had it. He powered it on, slipped on his reading glasses and regarded Levi with curious eyes. "Can you tell me, or is that also classified?"

Levi tore his gaze from the window again, meeting Erwin's eyes. "Let's just say we had to clean up a mess caused by our own service people. It's not a situation I've had to deal with for a while, but it does happen. Soldiers get crooked sometimes, just like cops."

Erwin clicked a few things on his computer, never even taking his eyes off Levi's solemn face. He paused, his hands hovering over the keyboard. "I see. You've been in the position of having to police your own military comrades, then."

Levi dropped his gaze to his folded arms. Realizing he was basically hugging himself, he relaxed them, dropping them on the arm rests. He didn't know why he was talking so much about this. His purpose was to pry more information about Erwin _from_ Erwin, not vent all of his emotions to the man. Still, he couldn't seem to close the door he'd opened up.

"Yeah. That's a good way to put it."

"I'm sorry."

Levi looked up, finding the writer's condolences odd. He saw no irony in that handsome face. He found sympathy and quiet support there, instead. It was familiar, and Levi couldn't help but think about how many times he'd seen that very same look in his dreams, of late.

"If we're going to keep talking about this subject," he said carefully, "then I think we need some liquor."

Levi could hardly believe he was even willing to keep going with the conversation, but he couldn't shake his trust in this guy. He'd always relied on what his gut told him, and right now, it was telling him that Erwin Smith could be confided in without giving away classified information. Damn, could he ever use an ear too, right about now.

"I could go for a shot or three," agreed Erwin, smiling quietly at him.

"Then I'll go downstairs and—"

Levi's response came to a standstill as his ears picked up the unmistakable sound of helicopter rotors. He snapped his mouth shut, and he tensed.

"Levi?"

"Shh," hushed the captain, cocking his head. He got out of his chair, and he went to the window to peer out of it. He could see flashing lights of an aircraft coming in from the west. He looked back over his shoulder at Erwin. "Stay put. We've got incoming. You don't move your ass out of this room until I say otherwise, and keep away from the windows."

* * *

Erwin stared as the captain charged out the door, leaving him sitting there on the bed with his computer in his lap and an uncertain expression on his face. He then heard the noise that had provoked Levi's outburst; distant, but coming closer. Adrenaline pumped, and he closed his laptop to put it away. He checked himself as he started reaching for weapons he didn't have on his person.

_Right. I have no ODM gear and we aren't fighting titans. They won't even issue me a gun. What in the hell am I thinking?_

But try as he might, Erwin couldn't smother the battle instincts rising within him. He couldn't obey Levi's order, either. He was no helpless wall flower; he was the commander. Ancient instincts drowned out modern common sense, and he soon followed Levi's path out the door. He snatched up his utility knife for lack of any other options, and he strode down the hallway to the staircase, not fully conscious of what he was doing. There was a threat, and Erwin was not going to sit it out and hide while others fought around him.

He crept down the stairs, glanced at the now nervous inkeeper, and passed through the common room. Erwin paused at the main entryway, peering through the glass of the window to the left of it to get a better idea of what was going on. Levi was already outside, and he appeared to be making use of a pair of night vision binoculars. Gabriel Leeson stood near him, speaking to him. Four other soldiers flanked the pair, each of them having already drawn their firearms.

"It's one of ours," Levi called out as the aircraft closed in and started to come in for a landing in the village square. "Stand down, people!"

Levi's soldiers lowered their weapons obediently. Erwin twisted the knob and cracked the door open just as the black helicopter touched down. He poked his head out and watched as a small handful of people wearing Scout Militia uniforms exited the chopper. As soon as Erwin saw the person in the forefront, his jaw dropped.

_Hanji? Hanji Zoë?_

Now he was sure that his dreams weren't just fragments of his imagination. Impossible though it seemed, Erwin was now convinced that he'd been seeing moments of a previous life, and he was connected not only to Levi, but to others as well. Nile, Marie, Levi, Hange...all of them were real people, and if that held true for them, then it stood to reason that others in his dreams were real as well. He might even run into them reincarnated eventually, just as he'd reunited with the others.

* * *

Levi relaxed when he saw the familiar, toothy grin of the woman he'd just been thinking of the other day. Her glasses were smudged with snow as she approached him, arms open and inviting.

"Levi! You stubborn little shit, I was hoping they weren't wrong when they sent me here!"

He couldn't quite stifle a tiny smile as Hanji embraced him tightly, though he managed a gruff tone of voice. He gave her a pat on the back before pushing her at arm's length, staring up at her. The brown hair was as messy as he remembered it, tugged back into a ponytail that always appeared as if she'd bound it at the last minute. Her friendly smile was as genuine and reckless as he remembered, and he again wondered how this person ended up as a medic rather than a straight combat fighter. He'd seen Hanji hoist a full grown man by the neck one-handed and toss him like a rag doll. Conversely, those powerful hands of hers could sooth and treat wounds better than any other doctor he'd ever known.

"Good to see you still in one piece, shitty-glasses," Levi said, taking a moment to look her over. She seemed in good health. "What the hell are you doing here, and what did you mean by that?"

Hanji was likewise looking the captain over, equally glad to see him in one piece. "Well, they've re-assigned me again. The order came through just today. I'm back in your platoon, now! Apparently you're short on medics."

Levi raised a brow. Yes, they were short on medics, and the ones available to them were mostly rookies. He was surprised, though. Hanji was the best of the best, and throughout most of this campaign, she'd been assigned to squads that had VIP personnel in them. "You're serious? What happened with Recon 20? I thought they were dead-set on keeping you."

Hanji glanced around, and she leaned over to speak in Levi's ear. "We'll discuss the details over drinks, shorty. It's not something I think we should talk about in mixed company."

Reminded that there were locals around them, Levi nodded in agreement. He looked at the chopper that Hanji had arrived in. "I'm guessing they'll head off, now that they've dropped you off."

"Nope! They're sticking with us!" Hange turned around to face the helicopter, and she made a cutting gesture with her gloved hand. "Power it down, guys! This should be fine for tonight. I don't think the locals will mind!"

Levi might have disagreed with her, but he could see by the expression of relief on a couple of villagers' faces that there was nothing but appreciation for Hanji's small group appearing. She was quite popular with the people of Jinae, after all. Fluent in Marian and skilled with medicine, she'd given them a lot of aid during her tour.

"So," Hanji said, dropping a familiar arm around Levi's shoulders. "Rum, yes?"

Levi sighed. "Sure. Rum is f—hey wait, what the hell are you doing out here?" He saw Erwin approaching with a decidedly dumbounded look on his face, and his temper flared. "Didn't I tell you to stay inside?"

Hanji noticed Erwin as well, and she spoke up before the blond man could. "Wow, Erwin Smith?"

Levi froze, and so did Erwin. The captain looked at his fellow scout suspiciously, having the wild thought that perhaps he wasn't the only one having his dreams invaded by Commander Handsome. "How the fuck do you know him?"

Just as Levi finished asking the question, Erwin blurted out: "Hanji?"

Now all three of them stood there in the snow, staring at one another.

* * *

-To be continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "Janet!" 
> 
> "Dr. Scott!"
> 
> "Brad!"
> 
> "Rocky!"
> 
> Levi: "..."
> 
> Erwin: "..."
> 
> Hanji: "..."
> 
> Me: "...oh, right. Wrong fandom. Sorry guys. I just had a moment at the end of this chapter.
> 
> Levi: "Are you high, or what?"


	6. Chapter 5

Erwin had a thrilling moment of outright surprise, when Hanji uttered his name like that. She knew him. She recognized him! Unlike Levi, the scientist didn't seem to suffer any memory loss of their previous life. His hopes were dashed a moment after Levi demanded to know how the two of them knew each other, though.

"I've read one of his books," explained Hanji. She was giving Erwin a puzzled stare. "I'm not mistaken, am I? He looks just like the picture of the author in the bio."

Realizing what had really happened here, Erwin swallowed disappointment. He nodded. "I'm Erwin Smith, yes." His brain picked up on what she'd said. "You've read one of my books?"

"Absolutely." Hanji smiled at him. "The one about the titans. I found some of your theories concerning their origins to be very interesting, too."

The puzzled look returned to Hanji's face. "But how do _you_ know _me_? I don't recall us ever having met in person before."

Erwin thought quickly, reminded that he'd blurted her name thoughtlessly just after she'd called out his. "Your dog tags. I read your name off them when you called mine, because I had a moment of social panic, thinking we'd met and I simply couldn't remember you. I was trying to avoid an awkward moment."

Levi seemed to relax after hearing the explanation. "Damn, you've got some sharp eyes if you could read her tags from that far in the dark, Smith. Why do you worry so much about offending people? If someone knows you and you can't remember their name, just be fucking honest about it. Most people won't flip their shit over it."

"I suppose that's true," conceded Erwin, relived himself that he'd salvaged the situation without having to explain that he'd been seeing Hanji in his dreams. Levi would have probably had him thrown in the clink and called for someone to come pick Erwin up and force him to go home, had Erwin told the truth. The writer knew how positively insane it all sounded, and he was having a difficult enough time resisting the urge to tell Levi all of it.

"Blame it on my upbringing," excused Erwin. "My parents raised me to be polite, even if it means fabricating something."

"Tch. So you'll lie to someone's face rather than offend them. Why doesn't that surprise me?"

Erwin flushed, prepared to defend himself. Hanji spoke up before he could come up with a rebuttal, though.

"Guys, how about we go inside for those drinks? It's freaking cold out here, and I'm really interested to know why Mr. Smith is hanging out with Shorty's crew, all decked out in military garb! Plus, I've still got to give you the basic run-down of what's going on with me, Levi."

"Guess you've got a point," agreed Levi. "Let's hit up the Innkeeper for that rum. It'll be quieter in the common room right now than it would be at the local tavern."

* * *

"Okay," Levi said a short while later once the Innkeeper brought over a bottle of locally distilled rum the captain had paid for. He uncapped it, and he poured into the glasses also brought to their table in the common room. "You start first, four-eyes. What made them decide to send you back to me?"

Hanji huddled a little in her chair, rubbing her arms. "Brr. It really does get cold up here in these mountains at night."

Levi slid her glass over to her, fixating her with an expectant stare.

Hanji sighed, and she tugged her gloves off and set them aside before taking up the shot. "All right, stop glaring. I assume it's all right to speak in front of Handsome, here?" She nodded meaningfully at Erwin.

"As long as it's not classified, sure," Levi affirmed with a nod. "Erwin here is with us to document some details about this conflict. He plans on writing a book; not that it'll make much of a difference. My job is to keep the dork alive while he's in my platoon."

Some bitterness had crept into Levi's tone as he explained. He still resented being assigned to baby sit Erwin, though he had to admit to himself that the man wasn't just some nerdy leech. Erwin had made himself useful in more ways than once since his arrival, and the man had some discipline that still had Levi wondering if he'd gotten more military training than the hasty information Levi had received about him let on. He passed Erwin's drink to him, noting that the blond's chiseled features gave away no expression of umbrage. He could take some punches like a soldier. Levi's insulting language didn't seem to trouble him overtly.

"So, what's going on?" pressed Levi. He took up his glass and he grimaced as he had a swallow of the spiced rum. Levi motioned to the Innkeeper. "Hey, can we get a pitcher of water too? I need something to chase this with."

As the Innkeeper hastened to fetch what Levi requested, Hanji began to explain. Her eyes darkened, and she stared into her glass after emptying it with three swallows. "You want to know what happened, Levi? I got re-assigned because my Recon squad is gone."

Levi ogled her for a moment. Hanji was known for having an inappropriate sense of humor at times, and he half-hoped she was demonstrating that trait right now. He could see by the haunted look on her face that this was no joke, though. He refilled her glass for her, momentarily forgetting their company and focusing solely on his friend. "All of them?"

Hanji blew a sigh, taking up the filled glass thankfully. She nodded. "All except who I brought here with me, grump. They hit us at dawn today, before the sun came up. We weren't encamped in the red zone, so we thought we'd be all right. It all happened so fast. Our commander went down before any of us could raise a weapon, and then there was nothing except gunfire, explosions and chaos. We lost our whole convoy. Every ground vehicle and every chopper, except the one I came here in with my remaining squad mates. They even got our tanks. It's frankly a miracle I got out of there alive. In fact, I'll need to check on two of my guys soon; they took bullets. They're resting up in the cabin of the helicopter and I've got my assistant watching over them."

"They can stay here at the Inn with my injured people," insisted Levi, swallowing the sick horror rolling through his gut. Recon 20 had been one of the better equipped Scouting squads, mostly running communications between the other deployed Scouts and the Garrison. To hear they got attacked in neutral territory was distressing, even though Levi knew better than to assume any Sinarians were safe anywhere at any time in this country. "I've set up three rooms just for the wounded. I think there should be enough bedding for two more."

Hanji smiled at him tiredly. "I knew I could count on you, Levi. Thank you. I'll go out to the chopper and let Moblit know in a minute."

"He's still with you?" Levi smirked. "Is he still crushing on you?"

Hanji laughed, shaking her head. "No, I nipped that in the bud. Hated to have to be brutal about it, though. He's a nice guy."

"What'd you do to get the message across?" Levi could almost feel pity for the man with the dark blond hair that he recalled. Moblit was loyal to Hanji to a fault, and he would do just about anything she asked of him. Too bad for Moblit that she only went for other chicks.

"Felt up a bar wench in front of him." Hange finished her second drink, and she slid her glass towards Levi purposefully. He obligingly refilled it as she went on. "I kept telling the man that I don't go for cock, but I made the mistake of admitting to him that if I'd ever make an exception, it would be for him."

Levi grimaced. "Ouch. That's pretty fucking brutal, Hanji."

She visibly winced. "Yes, I know. The poor dear just wouldn't accept that I couldn't be persuaded to the other side of the fence, after that. I had to resort to extreme measures. Moblit's a forgiving sort, though. I don't think he holds it against me, but I'll never forgive myself for the look on his face when I proved my point right in front of him."

"Poor bastard," intoned Levi, and he meant it. Moblit had been with Hanji from almost the beginning, and though his ass-kissing often wore on Levi's nerves, he knew that while she had Moblit at her side, Hanji would always have someone watching her back. He frowned as another odd "flashback" came to him. He could picture Moblit chastising Hanji for reckless behavior. She'd been groping something that looked like a giant arm with no skin on it, and it had burned her hands. There was a boy attached to the arm, seemingly fused to it. The boy was struggling to pull himself free, and there were people surrounding him, yelling at him. All of them were scared shitless of the kid except for Levi himself...and Hanji.

_What the fuck?_

"Levi, are you okay?"

The captain shook himself out of his odd daydream, looking at his friend and schooling his features. "Fine. Just wondering why they didn't send you home after this shit happened."

Hanji shrugged. She took another swallow of the drink Levi had just refreshed for her, and she waited for the proprietor to set down a pitcher of water and some glasses. Once he walked away again, she spoke. "Your platoon has the highest survival rate. You're valuable, Levi, and I guess I am too. They re-assigned me to you because I've got veteran experience and you guys pull in more intel than anyone. We make a good team, and they've admitted that now."

Levi considered this information, and it was sound logic. He glanced at Erwin, who had been silent through the entire conversation. He noticed the blond's glass was empty, and he poured more rum into it. "Nothing to say, Smith?"

"I didn't want to interrupt," excused Erwin softly. "You're obviously old friends, and it would have been rude to ask questions in the middle of your conversation. Miss Zoë, my condolences for the loss of your squad."

Hanji looked at Erwin with sharp interest. "Thanks. I wasn't trying to ignore you, just so you know. We're all exhausted. So I presume you'll be putting this all down in your book?"

Erwin visibly hesitated. "A couple of days ago, the answer to that question would have likely been 'yes', but I think my attitude has changed."

"Oh?" Hanji put her drink down, propped her elbows on the table and rested her chin in her palms. "How so?"

Levi looked at Erwin as well, interested to hear his answer in spite of himself. The man was there to document the goings-on behind this conflict, after all. What reason would he have for hesitating to make use of good writing material?

"Because of the look in your eyes when you revealed what happened," explained Erwin at last. "I may mention the even in my book with your permission, but I won't be using names. It would feel...disrespectful. You've suffered a loss, and I won't capitalize on that."

Both soldiers went still at Erwin's graceful, thoughtful reply. Levi stared at Erwin, and all he could think of was how perfect it was for Erwin Smith to be so goddamned eloquent and respectful of military losses. It brought a wave of nostalgia with it, and Levi swallowed.

_I'd follow him into Hell._

It certainly wasn't the first time the thought had crossed his mind since meeting Erwin and having these delusions that kept plaguing him.

_You would sacrifice anything for something you believe in, wouldn't you blondie? Even your own people...but that's proof of your conviction, and the burden doesn't way light on you. How many times have I seen that haunted look on your face that I'm seeing right now? Wait a minute...I'm doing it again. Fuck._

When Levi again snapped himself out of his thoughts, he noticed Hanji was now looking at _him_ with more than passive interest. Had his thoughts shown on his face? What must she be thinking, right now? Fuck, had he been staring at Erwin with open hero worship, and all over some high-minded speech?

"Well, I'll let your actions speak for you," Levi said gruffly to Erwin, trying to cover up his own lapse. "You talk pretty, but we'll see."

* * *

Much later that night, Levi got a knock on his Inn room door. He rolled his eyes when he heard Hanji's soft inquiry from the other side.

"Psst...hey Levi, are you still up? I know you have an aversion to sleep, shrimp."

Levi was half-tempted to play dead and not answer, but the truth was, he'd missed Hanji. He got up with a little grunt, and he crossed the room to the door. Unlocking it, he cracked it open to affix Hange with a glare that wasn't entirely sincere.

"It's almost three in the fucking morning. What do you want?"

"I can't sleep," she informed him, obviously unimpressed by his expressed annoyance. "Can I come in for a bit?"

Recalling that he hadn't had a spare room available to offer her, Levi grunted in acknowledgement and let her in. Trying to bed down in the back of the helicopter couldn't be very comfortable, and she'd been through an ordeal. Levi gestured silently at the bed in offering.

"Get some rack. You need it."

Hanji chuckled softly, ruffling his hair familiarly with one hand while closing the door behind her with the other. "I didn't come to commandeer your bed, Levi. I just wanted to talk for a little while. My head's too busy. Mmm, it's nice and warm in here!"

Levi, now clad only in his underwear, a sleeveless undershirt and his dog tags, merely shrugged. "I'm offering because you've been through hell and look like shit. You're part of my team again, and I need you rested."

"Well, where will you sleep?" Hanji pointed out, "and don't say in the chair. You've got a bad habit of passing out in them instead of getting horizontal for bedtime, and it always puts you in a bad mood when you wake up because you end up sore."

Levi gave a shrug. "I think I'll be safe enough sleeping next to you," he said dryly, "unless you mistake me for a girl in your sleep."

Hanji laughed at that, her warm gaze drifting over him assessingly. She shook her head. "No, I can't see that happening. You might be a tiny fellow, but there's no way I could mistake your physique for one with a woman's curves."

Levi shrugged again, and he took a seat on the bed. He and Hanji had slept next to each other before, after all. A lot of the soldiers did it when the temperatures dropped, if only to keep each other warm. There wasn't anything sexual about it, and Hanji, as he recalled, wasn't a squirmy sleeper that would constantly nudge him awake trying to get herself more comfortable. Once she was out, she was out.

"So, what do you want to talk about?"

She sat down beside him and bent over to take her boots off. "How about we start with your handsome writer?"

Levi felt himself flushing. "He's not 'my writer'." But he didn't dispute Hanji's observation of Erwin's looks. The guy was handsome as fuck, and that was that.

"Goodness, you're touchy about it!" Hanji set her boots off to the side, and she removed her jacket, firearm holster and supply gear. She looked at him slyly as she deposited the items next to her boots and squirmed onto the bed, stretching out on her side. "So I wasn't imagining it: you've noticed his looks, too."

"Anybody with a working pair of eyes has noticed it," excused Levi. "What's your point? Smith is just a tag-along trying to make a buck off of this war."

Hanji observed him shrewdly as Levi lay down beside her. "Do you really believe that money is his only motivation?"

"He makes his living off writing," reminded Levi. "Maybe it's not his _only_ reason for doing this, but you and I both know how far some reporters and journalists will go to get a good story and get a little more fame and recognition."

"Or in his case, he could just be trying to get the truth out there," she suggested softly.

"How would you know?" Levi frowned at her. "You've known him in person for not even half a day. Now you're assigning a noble cause to his project?"

Levi purposely tried to ignore the fact that he himself had begun assigning personality traits to Erwin, making assumptions about the man even though he had no proof of their validity. He didn't know Erwin any better than Hanji did, and the dreams and delusions he'd had didn't count in any rational sense of the word.

"I've read one of his books and some of the articles he's had published," defended Hanji. "Maybe you should try reading some of his work. He writes with passion, and not only is the man brilliant, but there's something about the way his writer bio is set up that just gives me a gut feeling he's an honorable guy."

"You got all that from a stupid bio?" Levi's brows pinched, and he fluffed his pillow before resting his head on it. "And how am I s'posed to read any of his stuff? I doubt any local bookstores or libraries have it on the shelves, unless he's more popular than I thought."

"Yes, I got it from the bio, and from the way he writes," insisted Hanji, "and don't worry! You can borrow my copy of 'Truth in Myths: Legends of the Titans'. I brought it with me from Sina when we deployed."

The title of the book alone made a stillness creep within Levi, and he got a sudden, unavoidable mental picture of huge, bloodthirsty humanoid creatures with blank eyes and a single-minded obsession with eating people. He tried to shrug it off. He'd seen them in his nightmares before, though up until recently, his recollection of his dreams had always been fuzzy.

"What's it about?" he asked, and then immediately regretted the stupid question when Hanji raised an ironic brow at him. "Never mind. Titans, right?"

"That would be the subject of focus, yes." She chuckled at him, and she also laid her head down. "You must be more tired than you let on, shrimp."

Levi didn't dispute that. He'd been trying to fall asleep since they retired after having some drinks. He'd only managed to doze for a short time, and anticipation of having another dream involving Erwin Smith only made it harder for him to fall completely asleep. He rolled over to click off the bedside table lamp.

"G-night, Hanji. I guess I can check out that book in my spare time." He tried not to sound so interested in it. Levi wasn't averted to a good read now and then, but that wasn't what piqued his interest in it. He wanted to see what Erwin had to say about the mythology of the titans. He also wondered if he might better gain some insight about the man by reading it...something to prove to himself that he was just making up shit about Erwin in his mind and not actually experiencing memories from another life. After all, Hanji made it into his dreams sometimes too, and she never indicated that she experienced the same. She'd only recognized Erwin from his literature, not any bizarre dream sequences.

Just as Levi shut his eyes, Hanji spoke softly in the darkness and covered them both up with the comforter. "You know, I've had dreams about Erwin. It's funny, because I always figured it was because I'd read his material and that influenced me. You've been in a couple of them too, in fact."

Levi's eyes snapped open. Here he'd just been reasoning that the dreams were singularly in his head, and that was almost a comforting thought. "What kind of dreams?" he asked after a moment, bracing himself.

He felt his companion shrug. "We're always in the old world military forces together; the branch that used to be called 'Survey Corps'. It's kind of ironic, because the regiment we're in now is the modern day equivalent of that branch. The Scouting Militia evolved from Survey Corps, did you know that?"

Levi swallowed, his mouth going dry. "No."

"Well, it's true. I'm surprised you don't know more about the history! Anyhow, in the dreams I can remember, we're enlisted with them and I _think_ Erwin is our superior, because he's always leading the Calvary. It's always set back in that time period before the industrial era. Horses, drawn carts, no electricity. I wish I could remember more details, but the titans were there, too."

Now Levi was starting to feel sick to his stomach. "What did they look like?"

Hanji blew a sigh. "Like big humans, mostly male in appearance. Some have deformed features, and they don't have any genitals. Most of the time when they pop up in my dreams, it's the same two titans. They aren't as big as some of the other ones, and they're staked down in some kind of compound. They have names too, but I can't remember what they were."

"Staked down?" Levi frowned again. "Why? And why would they have names? Everything I've read or heard about titans claims they couldn't communicate."

"That's all speculation," Hanji pointed out. "You really should read that book, Levi. I think you'll find it interesting, even if it's not your favorite genre of reading material. Erwin has some theories that—"

"You already said you liked his theories," interrupted Levi, trying not to squirm in discomfort. He almost asked Hanji why the hell she'd never mentioned these dreams before, but then again, Levi had never asked and most of the time he tended to cut her off when she started trying to strike up a strange conversation. If he started pressing her now, it would make her suspicious. He didn't want to tell her that he'd had similar dreams. They'd be up all night with her excited chatter, if he did.

"So I did," she mused. She patted him familiarly on the shoulder. "Well, maybe we can discuss it later, if the book grabs your interest. Goodnight, Levi."

He didn't respond. He lay there in the dark with a blank stare, his mind racing. There had to be a logical explanation. It had to just be a weird coincidence. As Hanji said; her having dreams like that could be explained by her interest in that time period, the titans and her having read Erwin's writing. That didn't explain the blond tree's invasion of his dreams, though, unless Levi stuck with the reasoning that he was just seeing Erwin in his sleep because he thought he was hot.

For long after Hanji began to snore softly, Levi remained awake and thought the subject over.

* * *

The captain woke up early the next morning, before most of his soldiers were out and about. Hanji was still sleeping blissfully in his room. Levi sat down in the common room, and he ordered some breakfast when the Innkeeper's wife came and asked if she could do anything for him. While he waited on his food, he sipped on the cup of hot tea she'd made for him. He was still tired, but at least he'd taken advantage of the plumbing and had a hot shower and a shave. Once they moved on from here, there was no telling how long it would be before he'd get another chance. Levi supposed it depended on where his superiors decided to deploy his platoon next.

He finally managed to contact his commander after trying three times to get a decent signal. He explained to him that nothing was currently amiss in the town they were in, and none of the locals had reported any insurgents coming through. Levi was given orders to stay put until further notice and yes, they had tried to contact him last night to inform him that Hanji was getting transferred to his squad.

Levi blew it off. It wasn't anyone's fault. Up there in the mountains, even the most high-tech communication gear could fail at times. Plus, they were overdue for equipment upgrades. He told his commander that he would be on standby and he would keep checking in when he could to be sure he got the new orders in a timely manner.

Levi's breakfast came as he was ending his call, and he nodded in thanks when the woman refilled his tea for him. He examined his meal of breakfast sausages and eggs, and he started cutting into it without any real appetite.

"Good morning," said a deep, masculine voice from behind Levi. "Mind if I join you?"

The captain turned and craned his neck to look up at Erwin Smith. The bite of egg he'd scooped up fell off of his fork and back onto his plate. Erwin was dressed in his military garb as required, but all Levi could think was that it might as well be a tuxedo, Erwin wore it so well.

"I hope I'm not intruding," Erwin went on after a moment of silence. "That smells good. Maybe I'll have the same. Levi? Is that all right? Do you mind me sitting down with you?"

Realizing he was just staring stupidly at the other man, Levi searched for his power of speech. "Fine. Have a seat." At least he hadn't had another dream about Erwin last night, though he'd been so exhausted by the time he drifted off that he might just not remember any dreams.

Erwin smiled quietly at him, and he circled around the table to sit across from Levi. "How did you sleep?"

Levi shrugged, and he forked back up the egg portion he'd accidentally dropped. "Okay, I guess."

Erwin nodded, watching him observantly. "You aren't much for small talk."

"Tch. It's just a time filler." Levi chewed and swallowed his bite, and then he reached for his tea. He glanced at Erwin irritably as the man kept staring at him. "What?"

"Have you always held your beverages that way?" Erwin nodded at the unusual way Levi held the cup around the rim of it, without using the handle.

"Yeah. So? It gets drank either way."

"It's just...never mind." Erwin looked away, and an odd expression crossed his attractive features. He almost appeared nostalgic.

"What?" pressed Levi, interested to hear him finish in spite of himself. "Remind you of someone?"

Erwin looked at him sharply again, and Levi felt like that gaze was spearing straight through the walls he'd built around himself and into his soul. "Yes, it reminds me of someone."

Levi accidentally swallowed the wrong way. The tone of Erwin's voice and his intense stare made him feel like the man was silently prompting him for something. Fuck, he was a weird one. The Innkeeper's wife came over again and offered Erwin some breakfast while Levi coughed into his napkin, clearing his throat. Erwin thanked her politely and requested the same thing Levi was eating, with the exception that he preferred coffee if available.

While they waited, Hanji came down from upstairs, and she pulled up a seat without even asking permission first. "Ooh, smells good," she said around a yawn. "I think I'll have that too. I've only had energy bars and cereal for breakfast for the past two weeks."

Levi kept eating, not bothering to complain about her manners because he knew it wouldn't do any good. It was all he could do to keep his eyes off Erwin without being obvious about it. Hanji ordered breakfast as well, with a glass of milk. Soon all three of them were enjoying a hot meal together, and though Levi kept quiet, Hanji and Erwin chatted softly about his book...and the titans. Levi listened covertly, pretending to have no interest in the subject but secretly wanting to hear everything Erwin had to say about it.

"Well, there's never been any physical evidence found that the titans really existed," Hanji said with a shrug as the conversation went on, "as you've already said in your book. Do you still think the government has been covering it up?"

"Actually, I've come up with a different theory, since writing that book," explained Erwin. His eyes narrowed in thought, and he had another sip of his coffee before going on. "What if the lack of remains is due to some natural occurrence, rather than a massive conspiracy to hide the truth?"

"You mean like the dinosaurs getting wiped out?" Hanji spread her hands. "There's still fossil remains of them, though. What sort of natural event would be capable of wiping out the titans so completely that not even teeth or bones remained?" She was eyeing Smith with anticipation, as if she had her own thoughts on that, but wanted to hear his first.

"Maybe these creatures left nothing behind because of rapid decay after death. So extensive that they just—"

"Disintegrate?" supplied Hanji excitedly.

Erwin stared at her, and he nodded slowly. "Exactly. I know it sounds far-fetched."

"Not really," assured Hanji. Her voice had raised in pitch as her enthusiasm grew. "Consider spontaneous human combustion, for example. Sometimes all that's left of the recipient is a foot, or nothing except ashes at all! It's _still_ an unexplained phenomena, despite all of the research conducted. Nobody's come up with a definitive answer to explain what really happens. If it can happen to people, than maybe something similar happened to the titans upon their death. Once organ function ceases, their bodies react to something in the atmosphere and eventually dissolve without a trace."

Hanji gulped down some of her milk, and she wiped her mouth off with the back of her hand. "That is, if we're assuming they really existed. There have been enough illustrations and written accounts found over the years that I think it's entirely possible."

"Some people think unicorns were real," Levi muttered, unwilling to accept the possibility because that would lend credence to the chance that his dreams weren't really just dreams. "Doesn't make it true."

"Well, again I say you ought to read Erwin's book, before making any final judgments." Hanji winked when Erwin looked at her with surprise and Levi gave her a glare for opening her big mouth. "I'll get my copy for you after breakfast, grumpy."

Erwin now looked at Levi. "You want to read my book?" He looked flattered.

"I need something to occupy me when I take a shit," blurted Levi, embarrassed.

Hanji burst into laughter, and she patted Erwin on the arm. "Don't let him fool you; that's just Levi's way of hiding his interest. He never got brought up to just give someone a compliment."

Levi muttered into his tea cup, though he'd already drank all of the beverage and was now just pretending to sip at it to cover up his discomfort.

"Well, I hope you find it marginally interesting," said Erwin graciously. "Excuse me, I'm going to ask for a coffee refill. Do either of you want your drinks freshened up?"

Levi shook his head, even though he was out of tea and could have used another cup. He watched Erwin through lowered lids as the blond got up out of his seat. Hanji had given him her glass with thanks, and the writer carried both over to the bar to request refills. As Levi watched, Erwin bent over to speak to the woman behind it, and the captain's eyes fixated on the blond's ass. Muscular and tight, the curve of Erwin's backside was accentuated by the military pants he wore as they stretched over it while he was bent over.

Levi's palms began to itch.

* * *

Later that day after helping out where he could with equipment loading, laundry duty and even a patrol to look out for signs of hostile approach closing in on the town, Erwin returned to the Inn. He went up to his room to retrieve his laptop, and he thought of doing his writing in there where he could have some privacy. It was a relatively nice day out, though. The sun was out, and it wasn't as cold as it had been the day before. He opted to sit outside on a bench to do his writing, thinking that perhaps he could get the chance to interview a local or two for more details concerning how this conflict was influencing their way of life.

He passed by Levi on the way to his chosen seat, and he almost stopped to ask how long the captain thought they would be staying in this town. He changed his mind when he saw the wary flash in Levi's eyes, though. For whatever reason, Levi didn't seem too enthused about talking to him. Erwin felt like the man was avoiding him again, and he wondered if he'd given away too much of his feelings in his interactions with him.

After passing by the captain, Erwin bent over to set his laptop case down on the bench he'd chosen. He opened it up to get the device out, and when he turned with it in his hands to sit down with it, he saw that Levi was standing there, looking at him. The captain's sunglasses were on now, concealing his gaze behind the tinted lenses. Levi was standing there with one palm open and spread, and the angle of his head suggested he'd been looking around Erwin's waist area.

The blond looked down at himself, and he wondered if he'd put on a piece of his gear accessories the wrong way and was about to get chewed out for it. When he looked back at Levi questioningly, the captain had clenched his hand into a fist. Levi then dropped it, relaxing it at his side. He gave Erwin a curt, wordless nod, and he turned and walked away without a word. Hanji was standing behind Levi, and she looked between him and Erwin before hurrying after the captain.

 _Just what was that about? Was he thinking of hitting me? I didn't think I was irritating him_ that _much._

But Erwin remembered that Levi was a complicated man to understand or get to know. It had certainly taken him a long time in the other life to learn to read his moods, and he had to remind himself that even if he was right and they were both reincarnated, they'd grown up differently than in their past lives, under vastly different circumstances in a very different time period. Some things were different, even if they were basically the same people at the core as they used to be. With that in mind, Erwin felt certain that Levi was acting so strangely because he resented him for something.

It didn't occur to him that he wasn't the only one dreaming of the other.

* * *

"I saw that," Hanji remarked as she fell into step with Levi.

He glanced at her sidelong. "Saw what? Specify, shitty-glasses."

"You were checking him out."

Levi almost stopped, but he kept going at a quicker pace. "I was just passing by."

"Pfft, I've seen you 'passing by' and you don't stop and ogle people like that," she insisted. "What I want to know is why you looked like you were about to bitch-slap him while his back was turned."

Levi gritted his teeth. He hadn't even consciously raised his hand like that. He just saw Erwin's ass and wanted to smack it.

"Levi, I'm your friend," persisted Hanji, "and I can tell when something's bothering you. Why are you so aggressive toward that man? Does it piss you off that much to be attracted to someone?"

"Tch, you're dreaming," denied Levi, but she had hit the nail right on the head. It wasn't even Erwin he was angry with, though; it was himself. Erwin couldn't help it if other people had dreams about him, unless he had some kind of magic power to influence them—which Levi staunchly couldn't believe. It wasn't like Erwin had come onto him. Aside from staring at him a lot, the man hadn't done anything inappropriate. Levi couldn't even say with any conviction that Erwin was into him, because his own dreams and his thoughts about the man could be tricking him into seeing something that wasn't really there.

Hanji sighed. "Is that the answer you're sticking with, tiny?"

"Look, he's easy on the eyes, all right?" snapped Levi. "That doesn't mean I've got no self control and want to bone him. My hand was just itching, so whatever you think you saw, it was just a coincidence."

No _way_ was he going to confess the truth of it. She picked on him enough as it was. At least she hadn't seemed to notice where his aim would have been for, had Levi acted on his smacking impulse.

"Well, that's a start, admitting you think he's cute." Hanji ruffled his hair. "He's not a subordinate or a work associate, Levi. I think you'd be safe to go for it, if that's what you're worried about."

"I don't want to 'go for it'," he growled, "and how do you even know he'd be okay with it if I did? I don't know why you're so determined to throw us together."

That seemed to give Hanji pause, and she cocked her shaggy head to the side as she thought about it. "You know, I'm not sure why, either! Don't get me wrong, I think you definitely need to get laid soon for your own good, but..."

Levi stopped walking to stare at her. "But what? Is it just because you like his books?"

Hanji shook her head. "No. I like talking to him because I like his books, but that isn't what makes me feel like you two would just fit together. Maybe it's the dreams I told you about. You worked closely together in them...that much I can remember. You had a bond. I suppose maybe I'm projecting from that and feel like it would make for a good relationship."

"Fit together?" scoffed Levi. "I barely come up to his shoulder! How does that translate to us 'fitting' together, and what makes you think I want a relationship with him or anyone else?"

"I didn't mean just physically, Levi," amended Hanji, "though the size difference between you two is kind of adorable. I mean you seem to have a connection. As for relationships, that doesn't have to be physical, either. If you really want to stay single then that's that. Some people are happier on their own."

Levi relaxed a little, assured by her explanation. "So what are you trying to get at, here? You're contradicting yourself by telling me to 'go for it' and then saying you didn't mean I should try to fuck him. Make up your mind."

She chuckled, spreading her hands. "I know, I seem to be all over the place. I just have a really strong feeling that you and Erwin could become really close, if you'd just give it a chance."

Hanji's expression softened. "I also don't want to be the only friend you have. I don't like the thought of you being left with nobody to turn to if something happens to me. Maybe you think you don't need anybody, but I know you get lonely, Levi. It would be nice to see you and Erwin hit it off, even if it's just as friends. Does that make more sense to you?"

Levi shrugged, looking away. She wasn't wrong; he did get lonely, and he'd wondered how she was going lots of times while they'd been in separate platoons. "I guess so."

"Do you remember how you used to act when you and I first started getting chummy?" pressed Hanji. "You always kept me at arms length, like I think you're trying to do with Erwin."

"Didn't work," he grumbled.

"No, it didn't." Hanji squeezed his shoulder with a grin. "I kept at it because I like you, and I needed a friend as much as you did. When the chemistry's there, it's there...and you two have loads of it."

"I think you're exaggerating," countered Levi, still not bending.

"Am I?" Hanji lowered her voice, and she bent over a little to whisper in Levi's ear. "He looks at you too, you know. The way you look at him when he's not watching."

Now Levi's face really _was_ burning. Maybe he wasn't imagining things, after all. "You sure about that? Maybe he's just trying to figure me out."

"Probably, but he's enjoying the view while he does it." Hanji backed up, and she ruffled Levi's hair, ignoring his sputter of protest. "I think your gaydar is off, little man."

"I've never really had 'gaydar'," snorted Levi. "I'm not good at picking up on those things."

"Tell me about it." Hanji rolled her eyes. "For as observant as you are in the field, it takes you practically getting hit in the head with it for you to pick up on when someone's attracted to you. I'll bet you never notice the looks you get from some of your soldiers, either."

"Now you're just being obnoxious," he insisted. "I'm their captain. They look to me for leadership."

"They look at you for eye candy, too. Ah, Levi, you are just so oblivious." Hanji sighed. "No matter, though. Just think about what I've said, okay? I need to get back to our wounded and check on them. Oh, and here's the book!"

Hanji reached into her jacket for a hidden pocket, and she tugged out a worn paperback copy of the promised piece of literature. On the cover was a dated illustration of a titan in a forest, and Levi frowned at it, thinking it looked familiar, somehow. He took the book quietly, and he opened it up to the back to have a glimpse of Erwin's bio. There he was in black and white, sitting in a high-backed chair and dressed sharply. Classically handsome, Erwin looked very elegant and intelligent in the photo.

Levi didn't realize he was just staring at the picture, until Hanji chuckled low and spoke again. "If it comes back to me with a hole in it, I'll know why."

Levi tore his eyes off the photo, and he glared at her as the medic hurried off before he could act on his impulses and throw the book at her.

* * *

-To be continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Erwin: *shows off ass casually*
> 
> Levi: "I want to spank it. I want to spank it. I want to spank it."
> 
> Hanji: "Do it!"
> 
> Erwin: "Eh?"
> 
> Levi: "MY PALM JUST ITCHED, OKAY?"


	7. Chapter 6

Two days passed, and then four. They were still in Jinae awaiting deployment orders. Erwin found the town quite charming, and each night, he had another dream of his past life. Only one of them so far hadn't included Levi, since coming there. They didn't seem to occur in any particular chronological order now; they seemed to just be coming to him at random, and Erwin diligently recorded everything he could recall of each one in his dream journal. He began to piece them together in the order he thought they might have occurred, making a list of which dates he experienced them and where they should be in the timeline.

They had a boy in their ranks that could turn into a titan. People with this power were called "shifters", and this particular boy inherited a special gift from his own father upon becoming one—and he'd devoured him in order to receive that gift. Erwin didn't really understand it completely yet, but it seemed important. There were answers locked in the basement of the home that the titan shifter boy had grown up in...answers that might include the origin of the titans and how they'd came to be. Erwin desperately wanted to be there when they found those answers, because he already had suspicions. His father in that time period had died for knowing too much, and Erwin had been too young to understand everything that his father had told him about while he was alive, but he remembered most of it as he matured. He'd joined the Scouts in the hopes of ending the threat of the titans to humanity.

But what happened to him after that, he wondered? He'd found and recruited Levi, become the high commander of his military branch, lost his arm sometime along the way, and there was where it became a blank for him. Whatever happened with the basement? Did he ever reach it? He knew with a pang that he and Levi never acted on their mutual feelings for each other. He knew he'd lost more soldiers than he could count. He knew he would have sacrificed anything to get those answers and liberate humankind.

On the fourth night of their stay in Jinae, Erwin stayed up late in his room, typing furiously on his laptop. He was supposed to be working on his novel about the present-day war, but at the moment, his thoughts were purely on solving the mystery of his past life. He'd begun to type down all of his dream records in a computer document, backing them up as he went and emailing them to himself just in case anything happened to the original journal or his computer.

It was fast becoming an obsession to him; as was the man he'd begun to dream about the most. As he pondered what he'd typed most recently, he got a sudden flash of memory. Levi standing before a big oaken door, watching him with a blend of emotions on his fair face. They were arguing about something...the basement. Levi didn't want him to go on the mission to reach that basement. He didn't think Erwin was fit to make it there alive, and he was probably right.

* * *

_850, Military headquarters, eve of the battle to reclaim Wall Maria:_

"I could just break your legs," suggested the captain, and there was a slightly crazed look in his pale eyes.

Erwin stared at him blankly.

"Keep spouting that noble bullshit at me, and I will," Levi went on, neither blinking nor moving from his spot except to make a threatening motion with his hand. "You'll recover, but you won't be able to go on this expedition and it might be hard to take a piss for a while."

The seconds ticked by as they stared at one another, and finally, Erwin started to laugh. "I have no doubt it would."

He sobered a bit, though a faint smile still curved his lips as he looked up at Levi. The man loved him. That was the motivation behind this behavior, and Erwin appreciated it. "I have to do this, Levi."

Erwin explained once again why it was so important for him to be there to see it, and he could see the subtle dismay in those narrow gray eyes. Finally, when Erwin was finished, Levi spoke up again.

"It really means that much to you, huh?"

Erwin didn't hesitate. "Yeah. I need to know the truth."

Levi went silent, and only Erwin and perhaps Hanji could have detected the fierce inner struggle he was facing. "Then I'll trust in your judgment," murmured the captain.

While his voice sounded tired and defeated, his temper obviously wasn't. Levi slammed the door to Erwin's office so hard upon leaving that the commander winced.

"I'm going to be paying for this later," mumbled Erwin to himself, and he wasn't referring to the threat of any titans.

* * *

_Present day, Jinae, Maria:_

Erwin couldn't help but smile as that memory came back to him, though there was sadness in it. Levi had basically kicked out everyone—including Hanji—from that office so that he could have words with Erwin and do his best to convince him to stay safely behind a desk and leave the fighting to others. He had to have known that wouldn't work, but he'd tried with everything he had...without disrespecting Erwin's choice.

"No wonder I was in love with him," whispered Erwin, staring blankly at his screen. Couple that small, sweet, powerful frame with the face, those eyes, that hair and the no bullshit attitude, Levi really was the perfect match for Erwin. In fact, he couldn't really think of them being in love as past tense. Every time he saw him, he got cotton mouth, his heart pounded fiercely and all Erwin wanted to do was touch him. Just one little touch, not even in an intimate area. A strand of that jet-black hair, a graze of the smooth, elfish jaw, or even a brief moment of their hands brushing. It was ridiculous, how badly he wanted to touch Levi again.

But he couldn't. He had no way to explain to the man why he had this need for contact with him, because Erwin knew how obscenely mad it sounded. He was trying to settle for eye contact, trying not to crowd Levi and just enjoy the sight and presence of him whenever he could. It had just been a week now since he'd come to this country, and he was constantly sabotaging his purpose with this obsession.

Erwin's head started to droop. Lying on his stomach on his bed, he'd been typing awkwardly, rattling out his thoughts onto the computer. He caught himself before he nodded off, and when he glanced at the time, his mouth fell open.

_It's nearly 4 am. I've been doing this since eleven._

It was a startling realization, but then Erwin considered the "waking dream" he'd just had. It hadn't been a long one, but it wasn't his first, and he knew time seemed to move differently while having them. Shaking his head to clear it, Erwin quickly opened up a new document file, labeled it by date and time, and typed out his latest experience while it was still fresh in his mind. He then saved it to his dream records folder, emailed it to himself and then scrounged around for his physical journal to jot it down by pen.

As he wrote, his thoughts of course went to Levi. Erwin had seen the man reading his book a couple of times in passing. The last time was earlier that evening. Levi was eating his dinner at the Inn they were staying with, and Erwin saw him reading the book while dining. It looked like he was almost halfway through it, already. That made the blond feel good, and he smiled as he recalled how absorbed Levi seemed to be in reading the book.

Erwin finished up, and a jaw-cracking yawn surfaced as he closed the journal and put it away. He powered down his laptop, put it away and settled down for bed. He would be lucky to get two hours of sleep before all of the morning activity started, but unlike the soldiers, he had no official obligation to wake with the dawn and start hustling right away.

* * *

 _"Erwin_! Snap the fuck out of it right now!"

Erwin came awake with a start, and he was utterly bewildered to find himself standing outside in the snow, barefoot and clad only in his boxers. He was so confused that he didn't even feel the chill right away. Levi was standing in front of him, staring at him with a decidedly urgent look on his face and fully geared up. It then registered to the blond that the right side of his face was stinging and hot. Levi had one gloved hand open and poised as if prepared to smack him.

 _He slapped me,_ realized Erwin. That was why his cheek stung.

"What's going on?" muttered the writer. "How did I get out—"

"You were sleep-walking, idiot," snapped Levi, and the captain began to shove him back towards the Inn. "Get back inside now and get dressed! Stay low!"

Erwin was just about to ask him what the hell was going on, but then he noticed that there were scouts running everywhere around him, hoisting firearms and explosive launchers.

"We've got hostiles incoming," Levi gritted out, still ushering Erwin up the steps to the Inn. "Stay inside and stay low until you're told otherwise, got it? Get into the basement as soon as you're dressed. Don't stay on the upper floors."

"I under—" Erwin didn't even get to finish his sentence before he was rudely shoved through the door. He stumbled and nearly fell, and the door slammed shut behind him. Outside, soldiers were shouting orders. The floorboards shook as an explosion went off somewhere, and Erwin could see the orange glow from it bathing the dimmed common room with light through the windows. Of the proprietor and his wife, there was no sign. Erwin had no idea where the basement entrance was, but he guessed it had to be somewhere behind the door leading from the bar to the Innkeeper and his wife's private living area.

_"Tanks incoming!"_

The cry came from Levi's second-in-command, and it made Erwin's eyes widen. "Tanks?" he repeated to himself. "Shit."

Obviously, there was no time to waste. He couldn't stand there puzzling out why he'd sleepwalked—something he'd never done before. That was a mystery to solve later. Erwin vaulted for the staircase leading to the upper levels, taking the steps two at a time. He threw the door open to his room, and he could hear civilian guests in other rooms exclaiming in their mother language fearfully. Cursing softly, Erwin snatched up his discarded pants and yanked them on. He didn't bother trying to dig out a fresh uniform. Wearing clean clothes wasn't a priority, right now. He tugged on his socks and shoes, lacing the latter up hastily, and then he dressed his upper half in his undershirt, crew shirt and jacket. He almost opted out of equipping his gear, but thought better of it when survival instincts warned him against going without some kind of weapon and water rations, just in case. As he secured the gear straps with speed and efficiency that surprised even him, he looked around for anything else he might need. His laptop bag was, of course, one of the priorities, as was his dream journal. He snatched these up, put the journal securely in an inner jacket pocket, and grabbed his military cap. Taking his solar-powered flashlight from its case on his utility harness, Erwin turned it on and hurried out of his room.

He almost went straight for the stairs back down, but he heard the terrified cries of a child coming from one of the other guest rooms. Those people couldn't stay up here, he decided. It was too dangerous. Erwin turned away from the stairs, and he knocked on the first door he'd heard voices from. He called out to the occupants in Sinarian, in too much of a rush to make use of his limited knowledge of the Marian dialect.

"You can't stay up here," Erwin yelled. "It isn't safe! We have to get below ground. Please, open the door and follow me, all of you!"

After a moment, the door he was banging on cracked open, and a woman's frightened face peered out at him. "Levi soldier?" she asked in halting Sinarian, eyeing Erwin's uniform and tags.

"Yes, Levi's soldier," answered Erwin without even hesitating. He gestured urgently at her, and he nodded at the crying little girl crouching by the bed behind her. "Get your daughter, Miss. Hurry."

A man came out of one of the other rooms further down the hall, having heard Erwin's shouts. He was elderly, and he coaxed a woman around his age to come out of the room as well when he saw Erwin and recognized him. The senior couple kept one arm around each other as they joined the blond, the young woman and the child she had gathered into her arms.

"Is this everyone?" asked Erwin, unsure of how many civilians were staying in the establishment.

They all looked at him blankly, and he swore under his breath. There was no time to go door to door. He gestured with his flashlight, and he took the lead. Without thinking twice about it, Erwin procured his knife from his belt with his free hand and he gripped the handle in the way he'd been taught by his mother, ready to defend himself and these people if anyone came at them. He led them down the stairs to the common room, and then behind the bar to the door there. It was locked.

"Mr. and Mrs. Faust, it's Erwin Smith," called out the writer as another distant boom sounded in the distance, followed by some screams. The rattle of automatic gunfire soon followed, and Erwin gritted his teeth. "Please, I have civilians out here that need safe shelter! They are your guests. A woman with a child, and an elderly couple! If you can hear me, please at least let them in and take them down to the basement level."

Erwin kept calling out, practically begging. When he was about to give up and just try to find somewhere for his companions to hunker down away from the windows, the door opened up, and the Innkeeper looked out at him. He examined the people standing behind Erwin, and upon recognizing them as his patrons, he opened the door further.

"Quick, quick," he urged as Erwin stood aside and started ushering the people in.

Erwin waited for the others to go in, and he could see what appeared to be a trap door lifted up from the center of the entry room to the couple's private dwelling. It looked like they had a rug attached to the top of it, so that the hatch couldn't be easily located unless one knew it was there. They'd probably implemented the concealment some time after this conflict began, and now they were making good use of it.

Erwin was about to follow the others in, but when he glanced over his shoulder at the entryway to the common room, he could see a familiar pair of people running toward the building outside.

"Wait just a moment, please," Erwin said, narrowing his eyes to get a better look. It was Hanji, and she had her assistant Moblit with her. The latter was carrying a frightened, bloodstained little boy in his arms. They must have rescued the boy and were bringing him here for safety. Erwin could see now that some of the buildings in town were burning. He wondered if the Inn might be the only one that hadn't been damaged yet.

Hanji and Moblit stopped outside the door, and the knob twisted, but it didn't open. The Innkeeper must have locked it while Erwin was upstairs getting dressed. Mr. Faust was looking at the front door anxiously, seeming torn on whether to open it or not.

"They have a child with them," explained Erwin over the noise coming from the battle outside. "Surely there's enough room down there for them."

The Innkeeper looked at Erwin, wavered, and finally handed the blond a rink of keys with a shaking hand, pointing out one of the larger ones. Understanding, Erwin ran to the front door to unlock it for Hanji and Moblit.

"Move, move!" he urged them, gesturing at them and pointing to the door where Mr. Faust waited.

Hanji and her companion wasted no time running to the relative safety of the residency entrance, probably intending to leave the child there and then resume assisting with the fight. Erwin briefly wondered where the wounded soldiers were that had been staying there, but then he realized the chopper that had been outside in the square was gone. They must have loaded up the injured and flown them off when they realized hostile forces were closing in.

Erwin started to close the main entry door, when he spotted Levi outside by a well. The snow was coming down heavily now, but the bursts of explosions and the flicker of fires billowing throughout town provided plenty of light to see the captain by. Levi was on the radio, communicating with his squads and issuing orders to them. He used a headpiece to do this hands-free, and he turned to look back at the Inn where Erwin was standing in the doorway.

Levi shouted something at him, making a shooing gesture. Erwin couldn't hear his words over the noise all around them, but he could guess the man was ordering him to get back inside and underground with the others. The blond hesitated, because turning his back on Levi with such danger all around them and not participating in the fight didn't sit right with him. It reminded him of his recent waking dream, with Levi trying to get him to stay behind out of combat while the captain went off to fight without him. It didn't go well then, and it wasn't going well now.

Levi yelled something at the top of his lungs, and Erwin was finally able to make it out.

"Get clear, Smith! _Get clear_!"

It was then that Erwin saw the streaking missile heading straight for the Inn, fired from somewhere in the square behind Levi. He had only seconds to act. He could either try to make it inside and down the hatch with the others, or he could get away from the building before the impact. Hoping that Hanji, Moblit and the people inside with them were in the basement now and would be safe down there, Erwin took a running leap off of the front foundation deck of the Inn, clearing the staircase entirely. He hit the snowy ground rolling, and before he could even get fully to his feet, a small but heavy body crashed into him. He and Levi went tumbling behind the well out front of the Inn. There was an explosion as the missile struck, punching through one of the building's windows before detonating inside.

Levi shoved Erwin down face-first in the snow, covering him with his own body as flaming debris shot out in multiple directions. Erwin heard something whistle overhead, and a heavy object hit the gabled cover over the well, shattering it. He heard Levi grunt as pieces of that fell around them. Fortunately, the old well was made of stone, and it was wide and tall enough to provide them with fair cover from the worst of it.

When the disturbance cleared, Levi took his weight off of Erwin. The captain told him to stay down for a moment as Levi cautiously rose to a crouching position and looked around to assess the situation.

"Fuck. We're being overrun," stated Levi.

Erwin looked, and he could see bodies lying in the streets, fallen scouts and a few civilians, as well as the bodies of men wearing south Marian combat gear. He could hear the grinding engines, and his eyes widened when he saw a couple of huge, armored tanks making their way to the square from the main road leading into it.

"All squads, fall back," Levi called over his radio, pressing the communication piece to his ear. "That is an order! Fall back, find shelter in the woods and meet up later. We're outnumbered."

A moment later, Levi listened intently to his earpiece, and he swore and ripped it off his head. "Busted," he snapped. He looked at the fallen body of his second-in-command, and another vile string of profanities issued from him.

"Captain, we have to go," Erwin cried, getting to his feet. He grabbed Levi's arm when the man didn't move. "The survivors should know to retreat, even if they don't receive your message. We shouldn't stay out in the open."

Levi turned to glare up at Erwin, and then his eyes went to the now burning Inn. Erwin glanced at it as well. There was no way they'd be able to make it in there to pull anyone out. It was already collapsing. All they could do was hope that the basement structure was strong enough to keep the people in there safe.

"Levi," urged Erwin, seeing a subtly devastated look in the captain's uncommonly widened eyes. He was probably thinking of Hanji, whom Levi was obviously pretty close to in this life. Erwin could empathize with that, and there was a tightness in his chest as well over the thought of her and Moblit getting crushed under that building. "We can't do anything for them."

Levi's gaze snapped to him, and two angry spots of color blossomed in his cheeks. He looked as though he wanted to hit Erwin for even suggesting it, but Levi composed himself, gave one last look at the building, and nodded once.

"Yeah. Not now, anyway."

A bullet zipped in from somewhere, narrowly missing Erwin's leg. It hit the well instead, and Levi immediately drew his gun, took aim and fired at the insurgent that had shot at them. He didn't miss. The man went down with a spray of blood, clutching at his throat where Levi's bullet hit. The captain didn't waste any further time. He grabbed Erwin by the sleeve and took off, yanking him along with him. They sprinted for the nearest building to take cover, and Levi pushed Erwin up against the wall, gestured for him to be silent and then flattened his body against the wall too. He holstered his pistol, and he reached for the rifle strapped to his back.

"Get down behind that trash can," ordered Levi with a nod at the object.

Erwin did as he was told, squeezing in as much as he could to hide his tall frame. Levi got down on his belly, checked his rifle and readied it, peering through the scope. Erwin couldn't see who it was, but he heard two pairs of footsteps come crunching through the snow around the corner of their hiding spot. Two shots went off, followed by the heavy fall of bodies. Erwin peeked around the trash can to find two more of the hostiles lying motionless in the snow, one with a hole through his head, and the other had gotten hit straight through the eye.

Levi set his rifle down to squirm forward and have a quick look. He looked back at Erwin, scooched back and got to his feet. He shouldered his rifle, and he jerked his chin to the northeast. "Let's move. We've got to stick to the outer buildings and get out of this hot zone. Once we're in the forest and clear, I'll try to reach someone."

* * *

Levi was furious. The attack had come during the pitch black before dawn, just when the snow started coming down. The frozen precipitation decreased visual range and allowed the enemy to get closer to town before the patrol spotters had positive visual, and then they came in so fast that the scouting militia didn't have time to get into position and defend the perimeter sufficiently. Had it not been for the three tanks they'd brought with them, the invaders might not have gotten this far. Levi was confident that he and his men and women could have held them back, if it weren't for those damned tanks. He'd been telling his superiors that his platoon needed more than a few land transport and supply vehicles. He'd been requesting air and heavy artillery support for over a month now, since they assigned what he had to another Recon squad that was going deeper into enemy territory to the south.

Levi didn't even think "insurgent" was the right term to use for these hostiles in the north. While they were resisting Sinarian occupation in the northern territories, their reason for doing so to take back those territories for the south, under government approval. As far as Levi was concerned, the label of insurgent was more accurately applied to the small northern Marian resistance groups that had allied with the Sinarian forces to fight back against the south.

_Nothing about this war fits standard description. The whole situation is fucked up, and it's only getting worse. People that used to support us are starting to turn away from us, because they're tired of the fighting and let's face it; sometimes we bring it with us when we pass through._

But his superiors had told him that Jinae was rumored to be compromised by hostiles. It had been peaceful when the scouts arrived, but then this happened. The only explanation Levi could think of was that the brass got word that there was a _planned_ invasion of that town, and they'd sent Levi's platoon to try and get there first to secure it.

_Whatever. I failed. We lost it, and now my soldiers are being killed or taken prisoner. Hopefully at least some of 'em will make it out and we can regroup. We'll call in for reinforcements and a search and rescue. Just gotta get clear, first._

Levi had already taken out five enemies on their way out of town. It was more or less up to him to keep them alive and moving, since Erwin had no firearm and couldn't provide anything save an extra pair of eyes. Already, the blond had spotted one of the guys Levi had taken out, having noticed him hiding in wait at the last minute. His sharp observation had probably saved both their asses, truth be told.

Levi nearly ran flat into another southern invader as he took the lead down a small alleyway between buildings. The other man immediately recognized that Levi was one of the Sinarian forces, and he tackled him before the captain could take aim with his pistol. The weapon went flying out of Levi's hand as he went to the ground with his opponent, and he kicked out at the heavier man to get him off of him. Another man came running around the corner, calling out in Marian with a pistol drawn. He was yelling for Levi to surrender, while his companion fought off a second melee attack from the captain.

Shit. Levi had no idea where Erwin was, he couldn't get his rifle drawn fast enough and his gun was too far away to make a dive for. He got slammed against the wall, and he struggled against the heavier bulk of the enemy soldier, trying to get to his knife.

Again, the man with the gun yelled an order for Levi to surrender, but the captain wasn't about to give up. Right now the guy couldn't shoot him, because his partner was in the line of fire. As long as he had this guy grappling with him to use as a meat shield, he had a chance, and so did Smith.

Just as Levi got his fingers around the handle of his combat knife, a tall form came lunging out of the darkness, straight at the Marian soldier with the gun drawn. He went down with a surprised cry, and Levi realized that the human missile was Erwin. The blond had the element of surprise, and he punched his opponent several times, pinning down the man's wrist with his knee to keep him from using his gun.

Levi had to concentrate on his own opponent, and he could only hope Erwin wouldn't get himself killed in this reckless act of bravery. He flipped his knife once he got it free, fighting for breath against the arm that was pressed hard against his windpipe. He stabbed blindly, aware that the opposing faction wore combat armor like his own to help protect against bullets and stab wounds. He didn't get the knife in far enough to do harm on the first try, and he was starting to see stars. Levi opted to try for a non-vital spot. The first thing that had to go was this arm cutting off his air and blood circulation to his brain. Levi jabbed upwards, right into the man's armpit where the body armor wasn't covering. It sunk in deeply and cut through the ligaments connecting muscle tissue to the joints.

Levi's opponent loosed his hold on him, and the captain fell to the ground as the man staggered back, clamping his other hand beneath the bleeding armpit. Both of them looked at Levi's gun. The Marian reached for his own firearm as Levi dove for his desperately. A shot went off just as Levi's fingers touched the cold handle-grip of his pistol, but he didn't feel the impact of a bullet...not in his flesh or in his Kevlar lining.

He looked up to see Erwin Smith standing there with a gun. The writer had apparently either killed or incapacitated the man he was earlier grappling with, and he'd taken his firearm. Erwin was now pointing the pistol at the man Levi had been fighting with. He'd shot him in the leg. Levi quickly assessed the situation, and he kicked his fallen opponent in the temple to silence his screams. He gave a nod at the stunned-looking writer.

"Nicely handled, Smith. Is he dead?"

Erwin snapped out of it, and he looked down at the man he'd overpowered. "No. Just unconscious."

Levi collected his own firearm, and he looked at it before looking at the two fallen men. He started to take aim at Erwin's vanquished opponent first, and the blond came up next to him and grabbed his wrist.

"Levi! They're down. There's no need for that."

The rational part of Levi's brain agreed with him, but the anger churning within him couldn't be so easily quelled. "These fuckers cost me soldiers. Good men and women that came here trying to help people."

"Levi. Please."

The captain looked into those vivid blue eyes, and he wavered. He'd seen that look before. "Why should I give them any quarter?"

Erwin took a slow, deep breath. "Because you aren't a murderer. You said it yourself: they aren't the 'enemy'. Their threat to us is gone. Don't do this."

Something within Levi shifted, then. He couldn't explain it, anymore than he could explain the dreams he'd been having about this tall blond man. He took a shuddering breath, and he lowered his weapon. Before he knew he was saying it, he blurted out his compliance.

"I'll trust your judgment, chief."

* * *

Those words rang in Erwin's head throughout the rest of the day. He and Levi managed to make it out of town and into the woods, and they took up shelter under a strange and gnarled tree. It was _almost_ a cave. The twisting brambles formed a sort of igloo over the two of them when they crawled beneath it. Shivering, Erwin hunched up against his small companion. The silence loomed between them, and it made him ache inside.

"Captain, what happened back there wasn't your fault," he finally whispered, looking at Levi as the brunet fussed with his communication gear.

"It was _somebody's_ fault," Levi intoned softly. He kept twisting the wiring and testing the equipment. "That was no fucking accident. They knew."

Erwin absorbed this bit of information, and he pulled out his writing journal to jot it down. His laptop had limited power, so he used his paper tablet whenever he needed to in order to spare energy. "You think this was set up?"

Levi looked at him, and Erwin paused in his writing to examine the captain's angry, cold countenance. He felt like he'd offended him, and Levi had already been through enough. "I didn't mean—"

"Yeah, I think it was set up," interrupted Levi. His pouty lips thinned with anger. "I think someone fed my superiors bullshit information, and they ate it up with a spoon. Write that in your fucking journal."

Erwin sighed, and he put said journal away. He hated the look on Levi's face now. The self-loathing, the frustration...he wanted to kiss it away, but he didn't dare try. It felt wrong to write about the situation when this man was so obviously distressed, and God help him, Erwin loved him all the more for it.

"I'm sorry. I wish that I could offer a solution."

Levi's umbrage visibly cooled. His expression softened briefly, and he grunted. "It isn't your fault. I'm just lashing out because I'm so goddamned tired."

Softly, Levi added a follow-up lament. "I wish I knew who made it. Wish I could get this shit-ass gear working so I could check in and request some help. Hanji's probably gone, now. My second-in-command took a bullet to his head. I screwed up."

Erwin ached for him. He longed to reach out and pull Levi into a comforting embrace. He restrained himself. "Again: it wasn't your fault. You were as prepared as anyone could expect of you."

His words of comfort apparently fell on deaf ears. Levi had curled into a little ball, apparently trying to warm himself. "I'm their commander. My responsibility. I'll get them free somehow."

"You can only do so much," reminded Erwin. God, it was so cold. He suppressed a shiver. "We haven't had any sleep. It can be worked out after some rest."

Levi looked at him with tired, bloodshot eyes. His dark bangs hung over them, and he looked...utterly mortal. "Yeah. Some rest would be good. Scoot your big ass closer, Smith. We need to share body heat."

It hadn't dawned on Erwin that they might have to cuddle to stay warm. It made perfect sense, but the thought of lying flush against Levi made his cheeks redden with more than the cold. He complied as Levi lay down, and he wasn't sure what to do with his hands.

"Put your arms around me, stupid."

Levi had already embraced him and snuggled close. Erwin felt utterly helpless and awkward, like a teenaged boy getting hugged by his first crush. He obeyed slowly, almost delicately. Levi felt so damned good against him that he almost felt the urge to weep. How had he existed for this long without this man in his arms?

"Is this okay?" he murmured against the captain's hair. Levi's cap had gone lopsided, and he nearly corrected it, but he was afraid to ruin this little moment.

"It's fine," yawned Levi. He snuggled close and threw a leg across Erwin's. "You're pretty warm."

Oh God, that was even worse. The casual intimacy stunned Erwin.

_I've never had the chance to hold you like this._

Suddenly, the tension of the situation seemed to melt away. There was only Levi, and Erwin thought that nobody had ever fit against him so well. He nuzzled the captain's soft, dark hair, and he hugged him closer. Levi was already falling asleep, he realized. He trusted him that much already. Erwin's heart ached.

"I love you, Levi," he whispered into those soft, black locks.

It was probably for the best that Levi was sleeping soundly with his face pressed against Erwin's chest, unable to hear the admission.

* * *

It took Erwin a very long time to finally fall asleep, and he felt like he'd only just drifted off when a distressed sound from Levi woke him again. The captain was squirming in his sleep, moaning softly. Erwin nearly roused him out of concern, thinking that he was having a nightmare. Upon examining his face in the dappled gray light, he had another theory come to him. Levi's fair features were flushed, and his breath had quickened. His hands kept curling against Erwin's back, almost kneading the material of the blond's jacket like a cat.

"Levi," whispered Erwin, unsure of what to do.

Erwin's voice speaking his name seemed to have an effect on Levi...one that Erwin was neither prepared for or expecting from him. He felt the hardness grinding against his thigh as Levi rubbed against him, and that was when he understood.

This was no nightmare. Levi was having a wet dream.

At first, Erwin felt distinctly uncomfortable and awkward, like he'd just walked in on the other man jerking himself off. Then the captain groaned a name aloud, and Erwin's face went hot with the realization of whom he was fantasizing about.

"Erwin," said Levi, his voice breathy and low.

All manner of possible scenarios flitted through the imaginative writer's mind, and he wondered who was fucking whom in this dream Levi was caught up in. He supposed it didn't really matter, but he could easily visualize himself pounding into that tight little ass. Levi was, without a doubt, a highly fuckable person in Erwin's eyes.

"I'm here," he found himself husking. He stroked Levi's back in a soothing manner, swallowing against the tide of lust that was shooting through his body. He was soon as hard in the pants as his companion, and he couldn't stop staring at the expressions of unguarded pleasure that kept flitting over Levi's face. Erwin took one hand off of Levi's back, and he traced the parted, gasping lips with the pad of his thumb. He fought back a groan when Levi's tongue swiped at the digit, sinfully erotic.

"Erwin," moaned Levi again, his hips jerking.

Something primal arose within Erwin at that desperate, second cry of his name. He cupped Levi's ass with both hands, pulling him flush against his body. "Come for me," he urged, knowing that if Levi woke up and realized he was taking some liberties, he would probably be a dead man. That didn't stop him from living in the moment, though. "Come for me, Levi."

Levi's breath hitched, becoming ragged. Another needy moan erupted from him, and he squeezed Erwin tightly. The blond knew the moment it happened; Levi gave one last thrust of his hips, and his strong little body went taught against Erwin's. The captain shuddered, and Erwin could feel the dampness spreading over Levi's crotch. He hardly minded it getting on his pants through the contact. He was too absorbed in staring at Levi's facial expression with awe.

"God, you're beautiful," Erwin whispered. He meant every word of it. This was the first time in either life that he'd ever witnessed Levi with such a vulnerable, unguarded look of pleasure on his face. He again wondered how he'd ever managed to stay away from him and not act on his desires. It was almost torture.

With a sigh of release, Levi relaxed against Erwin, panting softly. He snuggled him in his sleep, still unaware of the reality of his own reactions to his erotic dream. Erwin rubbed his bottom impulsively, unable to help himself. The chill in the air was definitely not noticed, now. Levi was fairly radiating body heat, so much that Erwin half-expected the snow surrounding their temporary shelter to melt. As powerful as his attraction to Levi had been before, it was doubly so now. Erwin wondered how he was going to look at the man again without displaying his desire like a blinking advertisement sign.

* * *

-To be continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Erwin: "My God, did I ever really think I could tame this guy? The way he used to speak to me is just shocking!"
> 
> Levi: "Hey asshole, you're sleep-walking in your fucking underwear."
> 
> Erwin: "...some things apparently don't change."
> 
> Hanji: "We'll be safe at the Inn!"
> 
> *Missile comes streaking towards the Inn*
> 
> Hanji: (๏д๏) "...or not."
> 
> Erwin: "I feel terrible about Hanji and Moblit's possible death, but at the same time, I can't stop lusting after the captain. Perhaps if I--"
> 
> Levi: *Having wet dream about Erwin and starts moaning his name*
> 
> Erwin: "Who was I talking about? Levi's orgasm face just made me lose my train of thought."


	8. Chapter 7

The drying stickiness in his pants was the first thing Levi noticed upon waking up. At first he was confused, but then he recalled the dream he'd had, and his face turned pink almost immediately. Shit. He'd dreamed that he was straddling Erwin Smith backwards, riding his cock with enthusiasm while the blond caressed and fondled his body. It had been an amazingly vivid fantasy, much like the dreams he'd had about the man in another lifetime. The sensations had been so real; Levi must have blown his load in his sleep from it.

Erwin was sleeping soundly next to him, his breathing deep and even. Levi bit his lip, and he carefully wriggled out of the bigger man's embrace. The heat of his embarrassment was scalding, and Levi could only hope that the writer slept through his dream emission and hadn't noticed it. Once he disentangled himself from Erwin's embrace, Levi crawled outside to relieve his bladder and try to clean up the mess in his pants.

It was no easy task. The sun was going down, and rather than use his drinking water to attempt to clean himself up, Levi made use of the snow. He got most of it, but it left a humiliating damp spot on his crotch that he had no choice but to try and air-dry. When he returned from the spot he'd chosen amongst the trees to take care of that, Erwin was awake and stretching outside of the bramble netting they'd slept beneath. He glanced at Levi, and the captain kept his expression as neutral as possible.

"Get enough rest?" Levi asked tonelessly. Inwardly, he was praying that his perverted nap hadn't been noticed.

"Enough, I suppose." Erwin was avoiding looking at him; or at least, that was how Levi saw it.

 _Fuck. He knows. Maybe not about me dreaming of_ him _, but he knows I had a wet dream. I can see it in his face._

Levi chose not to address it. If neither of them spoke of it, then perhaps they'd both forget eventually. Besides, he had more pressing matters to deal with than his own embarrassment. He took out his communication gear, and he went into their shelter to sit down and start working on getting it functioning again. He swore softly to himself when he tried it and got nothing but static.

"Captain, is there anything I can do to help?"

Levi went still at the inquiry. He wasn't feeling up to talking to Erwin right now. He might have a gift for keeping a poker face, but inwardly he was utterly mortified. Maybe he was just being paranoid. Maybe Erwin was oblivious to his unintended wet dream, and Levi was just imagining things and jumping to conclusions.

"Unless you've got some special electrician skills, I don't think so," he finally called out. "Just keep your ears perked and your eyes peeled for any sign of other people, all right? We aren't far from Jinae, and those bastards that got the jump on us could send patrols into these woods looking for anyone that escaped."

"I understand," came Erwin's response.

Mentioning the risk of enemy forces tracking them down made Levi think of Hanji again, as well as the other soldiers that didn't make it out of there. Levi wasn't prepared to write his friend off as a casualty just yet, because he knew damned good and well that Hanji had a weird knack for surviving the worst situations. That seemed to carry over to this life. She'd lived through getting shot in both lives, getting caught up in an explosion in the past one and numerous other situations the would have killed most people.

Levi went still as it dawned on him. He was thinking of those dreams as past-life recollection. He was actually starting to believe it all really happened. The kinship he felt with the people from those memories was all too real, and he'd started to wonder if he might eventually cross paths with others from those dreams besides Hanji, Moblit and Erwin.

"It's not possible," he whispered, scowling at the wild direction of his thoughts. It was utterly insane to be thinking like this, though Levi could not rationally explain why his usually dull imagination so vividly created these scenarios in his mind. One of the reasons he had little to no fear of death was because he wasn't creative enough to imagine what his would be like.

It was in that moment that Levi was stricken by another blast from the past. With his fingers entangled in the communication gear's wires, he stared blankly at nothing. He tried to shut the memory or vision or whatever it was out, but it was coming too fast for him to stop it.

* * *

_850, Shiganshina:_

Levi couldn't believe it. Erwin was still alive. He was breathing, though in critical condition. He froze in the act of giving the titan serum to Armin. His mind was in a conundrum. Erwin had entrusted Levi with this serum, to be used when and on whom Levi saw fit to inject it. A part of him had been expecting to eventually administer it to his commander since the day he was bequeathed with the responsibility, but Levi gave up on that possibility when the casualties of this struggle became too great for him to believe Erwin might still be alive.

Yet there he was, lying there drawing faltering breath while Levi and the others stood on the rooftop. Levi felt his throat burn, and his vision started to blur with the threat of tears.

"He's...still alive," he practically choked.

"Sir," called Eren Jaeger urgently. "The serum! Armin's not gonna make it if we don't give it to him soon!"

The decision came to Levi in a rush. He wasn't the sort of man to back out of his promises, but the unexpected turn of events made this moment an exception. "Erwin will get the serum."

Eren closed in on him, emerald eyes wide and shot through with gold in his emotion. Never before had the kid dared to make a threatening move on Levi, and the captain understood his feelings even if he didn't say so. Armin was one of Eren's dearest, oldest friends. Of course he would react unfavorably to having his superior back out of the decision to save his life at the last minute.

What Levi wasn't counting on was for the kid to have the balls to physically try to pry the injection case right out of his hands. Levi reacted swiftly and instinctively, hardly blinking as he struck the shifter and knocked him away.

Everything happened in a blur after that. Mikasa launched into action, and for once, she actually managed to get the drop on Levi. He ended up on his back with her pairing blade at his throat, and before he could retaliate, Hanji came in out of nowhere and pulled Mikasa off of him. Levi's relief to see that one of his fellow veterans was still alive was short-lived. He only had moments to spare, and while Hanji restrained Mikasa to stop her from interfering, the captain went to his commander's side. Levi rolled up Erwin's sleeve, having every intention of going through with it. Just as the needle touched Erwin's arm, the blond knocked the syringe away and spouted some delirious memory from his childhood.

Levi couldn't do it. He couldn't bring this man back into this hell they were living in. What sort of friend would he be to force this man to go on, after everything Erwin had sacrificed? Levi bowed his head, and he slowly cradled the syringe. "You've earned your peace," he whispered. "I'm not taking that away from you, Erwin."

The commander had done well by them all. He'd kept his vow, and the goal they were seeking was finally within reach. "I'll keep my promise to you," he vowed, and then he got to his feet and went to Armin's side. Bertolt was now begging them all tearfully not to go through with it, but Levi had no pity in his heart for him. The brat had made his choice to go up against humanity, and he'd forfeited his right to keep breathing by his own actions.

It happened very quickly. Almost as soon as the injection was administered to Armin, the kid shifted into his titan form. Everyone cleared the rooftop immediately, leaving Bertolt to suffer his fate. Levi stood impassively a few rooftops away with Hanji, listening to Hoover's terrified screams. They came to a blessed end soon enough, choked off as Armin took the young shifter into his mouth and devoured him whole. Just moments afterwards, the blond's titan body slumped, and its driver emerged from the nape of the neck. Eren and Mikasa rushed to pull him free.

"Levi, he's gone," Hanji announced softly as the two adopted siblings embraced their unconscious friend and wept with relief.

Levi turned to look at Erwin as Hanji gently closed the commander's sightless eyes. "I see."

He couldn't feel anything. Not even grief. Levi was numb inside. He already knew where he wanted Erwin's resting place to be. He couldn't take him to the basement as Erwin so badly wished, but he could lay him to rest in one of the dwellings close by that was still intact.

"Help me with him," he ordered. "I'm not leaving him on this roof."

"Absolutely," Hanji stated, sniffling.

Together, while the others watched over Armin, the last two surviving Survey Corps veterans carried their commander's body into a house. Levi spotted some flowers growing wild between cracks in the street, and once they got Erwin laid down on the bed inside, he picked one and found a vase to put it into. He and Hanji arranged Erwin's remaining arm into a salute, and they covered him up with his uniform jacket. Levi sat there quietly on the edge of the bed for a moment, and Hanji rubbed his shoulder soothingly.

"I'll give you a few moments alone, Levi," she said gently. Her expression darkened, along with her tone of voice. "And believe me, if we all make it out of this alive, Eren and Mikasa are going to be punished for their insubordination."

Levi nodded silently. He had no doubt that Hanji would make good on her statement, and right now, they had more pressing concerns. Levi waited until her footsteps faded into the distance and the door closed behind her, and then he laid his hand over Erwin's rapidly cooling one.

"I said I would see you see you go down, one day," Levi said to his deceased commander. Now the pain was starting to flare, along with regret for some of the harsh words he'd spoken to Erwin in the course of knowing him. "And the last thing I said to you was for you to lead our soldiers into hell. I practically encouraged your death, and I made you a promise that I haven't been able to keep yet."

Levi choked, and he wiped absently at his bloodstained face with his free hand. He bent over the commander's body, resting his forehead against the still chest. "I'm going to keep that promise though. I swear it to you; the last thing that giant ape is going to see will be my blades. I don't care if I have to cut down a thousand titans to get to him, and I don't care if it's the last thing I do. He's as good as dead, Erwin."

Levi lifted his head, and the tears were finally coming. He pulled down Erwin's jacket to reveal the man's handsome, still features. Erwin might have been asleep. He looked at peace. Levi finally did what he'd been wanting to do every day for nearly a year now; he pressed a kiss against Erwin's lips. His breath caught on a sob, and he barely managed to choke it back. He pulled away, covered Erwin's face back up and gathered his composure. He still had a war to win. Grief would have to wait.

* * *

_Present day, somewhere in the forest near Jinae:_

"Levi? Levi, are you all right?"

The captain came out of his trance when he felt Erwin's big hand lightly pat at his face. He blinked, and the realization that he had tears rolling down his cheeks was startling. He had no idea how long his daze had lasted or how long Erwin tried to snap him out of it before he came too. He stared at the blond, assuring himself that Erwin was in one piece and breathing. The pain in his heart was too damned real to simply be imagined. He'd seen this man die. He'd watched him draw his last breathe, and while he could have saved him, he'd chosen not to.

Erwin's concern for him was quite obvious. His blue eyes were watching Levi closely, and he put his hands on the smaller man's shoulders to rub them comfortingly.

"What's the matter?" pressed Erwin when Levi didn't verbally respond to his inquiries. "Did you get bad news over your transmitter?"

Levi swallowed, and he hastily rubbed his eyes and looked away. "No, I haven't gotten it working yet. I'm fine."

"You were crying," observed Erwin with a frown. "Granted, we haven't known one another for very long, but—"

Levi blurted a harsh, bitter laugh. It was an ugly, raw sound and it gave Erwin pause. The blond's eyes widened, and the concern etched in his face deepened. "You're having another breakdown."

Levi shook his head. He couldn't even begin to explain the reason for his behavior, and Erwin had already witnessed him lose his shit once. The last thing Levi needed was for Erwin to inform his superiors that he was cracking up. He didn't have his medication to take though, and even if he did, this was no time to dull his senses.

"I'm just tired," excused the soldier. "Just give me a minute to pull my shit together, and don't go blabbing to people about this."

Erwin sighed, and he pulled away with obvious reluctance. "You're only human, Captain. I doubt anyone would judge you for having a moment of stress. I'll step outside and wait."

Levi watched him go, and he wiped at his eyes once more and tried to focus his thoughts on the task still at hand. He had no idea how many of his men and women might have escaped. Those who hadn't might have already been executed, if they weren't being tortured right now. He had to get his equipment working, and he could only hope that someone else had managed to send a distress call to notify their allies that they were being overwhelmed.

As Levi kept trying to get a signal, he considered Erwin's vulnerability. He'd seen for himself that the man had some combat skills. It stood to reason that he could be taught to shoot straight, and now wasn't the time to worry about protocol. They had to survive.

* * *

"What's this?" Erwin stared at the pistol that Levi was offering to him handle-first.

"It's a gun, idiot."

Erwin sighed, but it was a good-natured, patient sound. The return of Levi's sarcasm meant the man must be feeling better, and he could stop worrying so much about him. "I'm aware of that. What I don't understand is why you're offering it to me after making it clear that you couldn't issue me a firearm."

Levi shrugged. "This is a unique situation, and I'm sure my superiors would agree that under the circumstances, we can make an exception. I know you can shoot; at least well enough to hit what you're aiming at. Have you ever used this kind of gun before?"

Erwin examined it. The one he'd taken from the Marian fighter had been of a simpler design, a revolver. This one Levi was offering him had a magazine clip. "I've used a semi-automatic before, though not quite as advanced as this one."

Levi nodded, seemingly satisfied. He dug into his jacket for an ammo clip. "Think you can figure out how to reload it?"

"I'm sure I can," agreed Erwin. "My mother is a retired MP. She taught me how to shoot long ago. This model isn't much different from the one she would give me to use at the firing range."

Levi's brows went up slightly. "Huh. Good for mom, then. That answers a few of my questions about you."

Erwin smiled at him. "You've had questions about me?" It made him feel a bit giddy, but then he recalled the sight of Levi crying, and his boyish sense of flattery darkened abruptly. What had provoked such a man to get caught up in such emotion? Erwin had seen Levi cry exactly _once_ in either life, and the first time had been after his friends Isabel and Farlan got killed. Was it just frustration over the communication gear, concern for his soldiers, or Hanji's possible death?

"May I just ask again—"

"No, you may not," interrupted Levi before the question could even be finished. "Forget you even saw it, Smith. Like you said; I'm human. Leave it be."

Erwin sighed again. He wouldn't push his small companion, but it hurt his heart just to think of the sight of him so vulnerable. He doubted he would ever forget the sight so long as he lived, and he ached to give Levi some measure of comfort. He could only give the man what Levi was willing to receive, though. He took the holster offered to him, and he put it on with a bit of assistance from Levi. Securing his new weapon, Erwin followed the captain as Levi checked his compass and started heading in a northern direction.

"Ask me anything," urged Erwin when the silence between them became uncomfortable. "Anything you would like to know. I'd be happy to answer."

Levi glanced at him, and then he reached into his jacket. To Erwin's surprise, he pulled out the tattered copy of the writer's book that Hanji had lent to him. Levi flipped to a page that he'd folded the corner down on to mark his place, and Erwin suppressed a wince. He said nothing of what he considered mistreatment of literature, watching as the captain scanned the page thoughtfully.

"Titans," said Levi softly. "You and Hanji were talking about them that night at the Inn. What gave you the idea that they disintegrate when they die?"

Erwin answered the question before he could even consider how it sounded. "I've seen it."

Levi stopped in his tracks, and he stared up at the taller man with a little frown. "What the hell does _that_ mean; 'you've seen it'?"

Thinking quickly, Erwin came up with the first excuse he could think of. "I mean I've dreamt of it. I have a rather vivid imagination, as I'm sure you know. The theory just stuck with me ever since."

Levi nodded slowly, relaxing. He pulled out his gloves and slipped them on to keep his hands warm. "I guess that makes sense. I mean if they were ever real, it would explain why nobody's ever found any remains. Seems Hanji agrees with that theory, and she's the brainiest person I know."

Erwin didn't miss the little sigh that followed up the statement, and he reached out to pat the smaller man's shoulder. "They were in the basement when that rocket went off. I think there's a good chance they survived the explosion, Levi."

The captain swallowed, and he lowered his eyes. "Yeah. The question is for how long? I'm sure the Innkeeper had supplies down there in case something like this happened, but they'll run out of food and water eventually. That's assuming the invaders haven't found them yet. I doubt those assholes are planning to bug out anytime soon, now that they've taken over the town."

"Someone has to have reported this event," reasoned Erwin. "I'm sure your superiors will send someone to liberate Jinae."

Levi didn't look so certain of that, and it gave Erwin paused. "What's on your mind, Captain? Surely they'll send someone, if only for a search and rescue."

Levi looked up at him. He parted his lips, and then he looked away in a troubled manner. "I still think this was no coincidence."

Erwin felt a shiver go through him, and it wasn't due to the chill in the air. Actually, he'd been pondering the same thing. Levi's superiors had sent his platoon to Jinae under the supposition that enemy forces had already moved in on the town. When it was found un-occupied, they'd instructed Levi to stay put and await further orders. Was it possible that they'd delayed assigning a new deployment order because they knew those Marian combatants would come eventually?

"You still believe someone in your ranks set this up?" asked Erwin carefully.

Levi's frown deepened. "I don't know. I just think it's pretty fucking convenient that those guys seemed to know how many of us there were and when the best time was to strike. There's that and the delay in fresh orders. I don't think my commander set it up, but someone may have. We've had double agents in our ranks before, Smith. I wouldn't be too shocked to find out we've got another traitor behind the scenes trying to sabotage our efforts. Call me paranoid if you like, but it's happened before."

"I don't think you're paranoid," assured the blond. "I think you've raised some valid suspicions, and to be honest with you, I've been considering the possibility of espionage, myself. Do you think it's possible that the squad I was originally going to be assigned to may have been set up as well?"

Levi bit his lower lip, and it was plain to Erwin by the look on his face that he had indeed been considering that possibility. "It's all just conjecture," stated the captain at last. "I've got no proof, so I can't go to my superiors with only my theories. They'd think I'm cracked and probably send me home with an order for mandatory psychiatric evaluation."

"I don't think they would be so hasty," soothed Erwin. "If this sort of thing has happened before, I think they would listen to your concerns and look into it."

Levi dug out some dried jerky rations, and he tore into one. "You don't know how these guys operate," he mumbled around his food portion. "Officers have to have evidence before they go to the brass with suspicions like this. Otherwise it's just a shot in the dark with no real basis."

Erwin was forced to concede that logic. When he was the commander of the Scouting Legion, he wouldn't have accepted seemingly random theories without some sort of proof behind them. He'd never even spoken of his theories concerning the origin of the titans to most of his fellow soldiers, because he knew such postulation was dangerous. He remembered Levi's reaction when they discovered that titans were most likely transformed humans and Erwin had smiled with excitement.

"Do you think I'm creepy?" asked the writer suddenly. His stomach started to growl, and he dug into his own supply pack to follow Levi's example and eat some rations.

"Haven't I already said so?" Levi gave him the barest hint of a smirk. "What brought on this question?"

Erwin had to again refrain from blurting out the truth, sure that Levi wouldn't believe him if he told him they'd known each other in another life. "It's just not an accusation I'm used to getting."

Levi put away the paperback book he'd been holding. "You say some weird shit sometimes, and you get a funny look in your eyes when you talk about some things." He shrugged. "Not that I think it's scary, but it _is_ kind of creepy."

"Well, it's good for me that you don't frighten easily," mused Erwin, scratching his stubbly chin. "Where are we heading, by the way?"

"We're going to keep away from Jinae for now, and try to make it to the next town," answered Levi. "If it's not already occupied by hostiles, we'll use someone's phone so I can contact my superiors and hopefully, get an idea of what happened to my men and what the commander plans on doing about the situation."

"Seems like a reasonable plan," murmured Erwin. He studied Levi, and he thought of what the captain had said about getting sent home under psychiatric evaluation. "Tell me, would being discharged and sent home really be such a bad thing?"

"Under the wrong circumstances, yes." Levi narrowed his eyes, and he stopped to check his compass again. "It's one thing to be sent home with a Purple Heart, or pulled out of combat because my tour's finished. Getting dishonorably discharged would be a fucking disgrace, though. I'm here to do a job, and no matter how fucked up the situation is, I plan to see it through until my service is officially over with, or I'm too wounded to keep going."

"But trauma would be considered a valid reason, wouldn't it?" asked the blond. "Many veterans suffer from such things, and I've never heard of them getting dishonorably discharged for it."

"It would be dishonorable to me," explained Levi. "Doesn't matter what the paperwork says. If I can't hack it as a soldier without having a complete breakdown, then I've failed my duty."

That made perfect sense to Erwin, and it was so very...Levi. The man was proud, determined and brave. Levi Ackerman was not one to give up on anything, and that hadn't changed in this life. It was on the tip of Erwin's tongue to tell the captain how much he admired those qualities in him, but at that moment, Levi held up a hand and shushed him. Erwin went still, and Levi cocked his head as if listening for something.

"Shit," snapped Levi, just as Erwin heard what had gotten his attention. It was the unmistakable sound of grinding gears, coming from just over the hill they were approaching.

"Move," urged Levi. "Get out of sight."

Erwin followed the captain as Levi took off at a sprint, heading for the nearest copse of trees. It was too late, though. The tank coming their way crested the hill before either of them could make it to concealment. Levi hollered for Erwin to keep moving and get into thicker vegetation. Erwin understood his logic; if they could make it to a location too cramped with trees for the tank to follow them, they might be safe.

Unfortunately, the occupants of the tank must have already spotted them. It sped up, and Erwin saw Levi digging for something in his supply pack. He realized what it was when the captain retrieved it, and Erwin couldn't imagine what Levi was thinking. The explosive charge in Levi's hand started to blink, and Erwin gaped at the man when Levi turned around and ran directly back _towards_ the approaching threat.

"Keep moving," shouted the captain.

Erwin shook his head, unable to formulate the words that were on the tip of his tongue. This was madness. Even if Levi somehow managed to find a vulnerable spot on that tank to attach the explosive to, it would only provide a brief distraction and they had no idea how many soldiers were riding in that thing. He couldn't leave the captain to deal with the danger alone. Erwin turned and ran after Levi, reaching for his gun as he went. As misfortune would have it, Levi tripped and went down. He rolled swiftly back to his feet and he started to lunge for the explosive he'd dropped, but then he seemed to realize how close the tank was. The cannon started to take aim at him, and Levi came to a halt. He held his hands up, and he shot Erwin a murderous look when the writer came to his side.

"You were supposed to keep running," muttered Levi out the corner of his mouth.

"And go where?" demanded Erwin, also raising his hands in surrender. "I wouldn't have made it far enough into the trees in time, and I haven't a clue where I'm at. The best I could manage would be a slow death of starvation or hypothermia, without someone to guide me through this territory."

Levi sighed, and he offered one last comment as the top of the tank opened up. "Sorry, Smith."

Erwin started to say that it wasn't Levi's fault, and if they were fated to be taken prisoner and killed, at least he'd gotten the chance to meet him. He wanted to tell him the truth, and he supposed it didn't really matter now if Levi thought he was out of his mind. The words died on his lips as a familiar head of brown, messy hair emerged from inside of the tank. His jaw dropped as Hanji Zoë climbed out with a wild grin on her lips.

"Hanji?" Levi sputtered, equally surprised.

"So," she said conversationally, winking at them, "do you boys need a ride?"

* * *

They got into the tank with Hanji after a brief explanation from her concerning how she and Moblit got their hands on the vehicle in the first place. Evidently, the enemy forces overlooked the hatch to the basement they were hiding in, and they'd waited until nightfall to sneak out, avoiding patrol groups on the way. Moblit was the one that suggested they try to steal the tank when he saw it at the edge of town, guarded by only two soldiers. After a brief fight, Hanji and her assistant bested their opponents, and Moblit drove the tank.

"I'm still getting the hang of it," Moblit told them once they were all inside. "We managed to bring everyone from the basement with us, and we dropped them off at a farm not far from here."

Levi nearly fell on top of Erwin when the tank lurched, the gears grinding. It was probably a miracle that Moblit had managed to get the damned thing moving at all, having no training on how to operate a tank.

"Shit," blasted Levi, landing gracelessly and directly into Erwin's lap. The blond caught him in his arms, and for one moment, their eyes caught and held. Levi's heart skipped a beat, and he thought Smith was going to try and kiss him. Worse than that, Levi thought he might let him.

"Nice catch, Erwin," Hanji observed with a chuckle. "Levi, you've got two left feet today! I've never seen you trip so much before."

"My toes are fucking numb," excused Levi. He was blushing despite his effort to remain dignified, and he got out of Erwin's lap almost reluctantly. "Have you contacted any of our superiors yet?" he asked Hanji, changing the subject.

"Yes, and they're going to send a strike team in to take back Jinae," she answered, sobering. "Although I'm not sure how many of our people are going to survive long enough to be rescued. We overheard some of the opposition talking about executing the male prisoners. I don't even want to consider what they've got planned for the females."

Levi's mouth tightened at the thought. He sat down across from Erwin, and he tried not to notice the sympathetic way the man was watching him. If action wasn't taken swiftly, Levi stood to lose his whole damned platoon. "How many got out? Do either of you know?"

"Sorry Levi, I have no idea," answered Hanji. "It was all we could do to get ourselves out of there with those civilians. We got lucky. I can only confirm that the scouts that were loaded into the chopper made it out of there safely before the shit hit the fan. As for the rest, your guess is as good as mine."

He lowered his gaze, and Levi absently touched his dog tags. How many of these would he be collecting, when all was said and done? How many families would get news that their son or daughter would never be coming home alive? As he considered the numbers he'd already collected in his time here, Levi thought of what Erwin said to him about ending his tour due to post traumatic stress. Maybe it wouldn't be such a bad thing. He was already going to have nightmares for the rest of his life, and not just about his experiences in this war. Now he had titans invading his dreams, along with the handsome, charismatic writer Levi felt so drawn to. He thought of the trance he'd gone into that morning, awake and yet dreaming of something that couldn't have possibly happened. It made his chest hurt to think of it, to envision Erwin lying cold and still in death.

_I don't want to end up collecting his ID tags along with my men's._

The thought came to Levi abruptly, and he felt his throat tighten up. Whether it was all in his head or it was in fact memories from a different life, that last vision had hit him where he lived. He was still trying to cope with the agony he'd felt, and Levi admitted to himself that real or imagined, now he knew what it felt like to have a broken heart.

"We should reach the farm in about a half hour," Moblit predicted, cutting into Levi's grim thoughts. "Sir, if you're hungry, there should be some bread and cheese back there in that storage crate."

Levi checked, and he found the wrapped items. "Hey shitty-glasses, how did you find us, anyway?"

"Completely by accident," she chuckled. "We were out looking for refugees or any other scouts that might have made it out of Jinae. It was just dumb luck that we happened upon you two."

Levi unwrapped the bread loaf, and he tore a hunk off to hand it over to Erwin before getting a portion for himself. Not that he had a particularly sharp appetite, but he needed more than a couple of dried strips of beef if he was going to keep his strength up. He ate his piece of bread and washed it down with water from his canteen before going for the crumbly cheese.

"Did you find anyone else?" asked Levi after swallowing a bite of the cheese.

"Not so far," sighed Hanji. "We'd planned on circling back around in the other direction, because in the chaos, our people probably didn't have time to coordinate. They could be scattered all over the map."

Levi hoped so. With no idea how many of his people made it out and no head count of how many got taken prisoner, he felt hopelessly inept.

* * *

They made it to the farm a while later, and Hanji introduced Levi and Erwin to the family that lived there. Consisting of a husband, a wife and three kids aged five through fifteen, they were charitable enough to offer the scouts and refugees their barn as shelter. Erwin suspected they were partly willing to do so for their own protection as much as kindness. They explained that they had already had insurgents pass through before and take some of their livestock by force. Erwin found a power source in the barn to plug up and charge his laptop, and he sat down to do more writing while the others settled in.

Once again, Erwin found himself writing more in his personal journal than on his work in progress about this war. Most of his thoughts centered on Levi Ackerman, naturally.

_"I don't know what provoked Captain Levi to weep like that, this morning. At first I wondered if it was just out of sheer frustration over the situation, but the Levi I know would not break down like that just because of tough times. He's the strongest person I've ever met, and it worries me to see him so vulnerable. I've tried not to mention it to him because he is so uncomfortable about being seen in such an emotional frame of mind. I'm extremely curious, though."_

Erwin paused, his thoughts turning in his head rapidly. The only reason he'd seen Levi like that was because he'd heard him emit a choked sob, and the sound was so unusual that he couldn't resist checking in on him. Just what had Levi been crying over?

"Oi," said a voice above him.

Erwin looked up to find the man on his mind standing over him with an odd look in his hooded gray eyes. "Yes?"

Levi took a slow, deep breath. He'd just shaved and cleaned up, taking advantage of the family's bathroom. "The bathroom in the house is free if you want to get cleaned up. We can't do anything about our uniforms unless we borrow something to wear from these people while we do laundry, but the plumbing works fine if you want a shower."

Erwin scratched his jaw self-consciously, reminded by Levi's smooth face that he was getting quite scruffy. "Thank you. I would like that." He prudently saved his work and closed the program, not wanting Levi to catch sight of the text and realize he'd been writing about him. Levi didn't move, and Erwin realized he had the look of a man debating something. "Is there something on your mind, Captain?"

"Walk with me," Levi said after about three heartbeats of further silence. "There's something I want to discuss with you, and it's going to sound fucking crazy."

Erwin's brows went up. He powered down his computer, closed it and set it on the nearby hay bale to continue charging. Getting to his feet, he wiped straw off of his pants and he went along with Levi out of the barn. Now immensely curious, he nonetheless waited for Levi to start speaking first. The sun was setting, and the pair walked around the back of the barn to a duck pond behind it. Levi stopped by the frozen water, his gaze fixated on the orange sparkle of the dying sunlight reflecting on the ice.

"I can't think of any other way to say this," began Levi, not looking at the taller man, "so I'm just going to come out and say it. I've been having dreams about you since you first showed up here."

Erwin went stock-still. He stared at Levi, hardly believing what he'd just heard. His heart began to pound, and he told himself not to read too much into this. "What sort of dreams?"

Levi heaved a sigh, and he stuck his hands into his jacket pocket. "Really vivid ones. Sometimes even when I'm awake. It's like my mind goes into this trance, and when it happens...I dunno...it's so real I might as well be watching a movie. I thought maybe it started happening because I think you're hot, but I couldn't make up any of this shit if I tried. I'm no writer."

Levi turned to face him, and Erwin could see the struggle in his pale gaze. "It isn't just you, either. I've dreamed about Hanji before as well, and Moblit, too. There are other people in them that I've never met in person before, but I could describe them all down to the last fucking detail."

The captain lowered his eyes, and he kicked at a clump of dirt with a booted foot. "There's also titans in them. We're always fighting them, and in these dreams, you're my superior. We've got this weird equipment that shoots giant wires and we fly through the air on them. We've got these big swords that we use to kill these titans. Pretty crazy, huh?"

"No," said Erwin, shaking his head slowly. And all this time, he thought he was the only one with any memory of that previous life. "Levi, you aren't crazy...or if you are, then so am I. The gear you're describing is called Omni-Directional—"

"—Mobility Gear," finished Levi for him, eyes widening. "Shit...what the hell? I've heard of group delusions before, but I never thought it was real."

Erwin put his hands on the captain's shoulders, excitement coursing through him. "I've been having dreams of that time period for a long while now, but you never showed up in any of them until I came here. Now you're in my dreams almost constantly, and like you, I've had some of them while fully awake. It's no delusion, Levi. It's real. The titans were real, and yes, we did fight them together."

He was starting to shake, and Erwin didn't even realize it until Levi said something to him.

"Hey, calm down," cautioned Levi. "I'm having a hard enough time rationalizing this without you coming apart on me, blondie."

"I'm sorry," apologized Erwin, trying to rein in his elation, "but you have no idea how much of a relief this is for me. You haven't any idea how many times I've wanted to say something to you, but I didn't think you would believe me."

Levi swallowed. "I wasn't gonna say anything, but while we were inside the house, Hanji mentioned having another dream of us. She's been having them too, so I decided I need to get to the bottom of this. What's your take on it, Erwin? What do you think it means?"

Erwin held his gaze, and he silently willed Levi to keep an open mind. "I don't believe these are merely dreams. I think that all three of us are recalling memories from our past lives. We all knew each other, we fought by each other's side to protect humanity from the threat of the titans. That's how I know they existed and why there's never been any remains found."

Levi nodded, still looking intense and thoughtful. "Have you met anyone else from these dreams or visions...whatever?"

"Actually, two of my friends back home make appearances in them," explained Erwin. "Nile Dok and his wife Marie."

By the way Levi blinked, he knew the names. "Fuck."

"What about you?" pressed Erwin. "Who else do you see in your visions besides myself and Hanji?"

"Moblit," answered Levi, "and that's all the people I've seen in my dreams that I've met in person. There were a lot of them, but you guys are the only ones I've run into."

"Name some of them, please," urged Erwin.

Levi named off Mike, Nanaba, Farlan, Isabel and the members of his Special Operations squad, along with the members of the 104th training squad. Erwin named some people himself, comparing notes with him. Once they'd determined that they both had memories of the same people, they began describing some of their dreams to each other. To Erwin's shock, Levi's not only matched his, but he had apparently been having them at nearly the same time as Erwin. There was one, however, that Erwin hadn't had yet.

"You died," whispered Levi. "And I let you go."

His account surprised Erwin. He had no memory of his own death, but from what Levi described, he hadn't even really been conscious when it happened. "Did we ever make it to the basement?" asked the writer after Levi finished describing his death to him.

Levi met his eyes. "Some of us did. You passed before we got in there, though."

Erwin took the news stoically. Considering how many scouts had died for the cause, he wasn't very surprised to learn he was one of the casualties of war. "What did you find there?"

Levi shook his head, and he ran his fingers through his hair. "I don't know. The last thing I remember about that was kicking the door open. Maybe it'll come to me eventually and maybe not. I've thought about talking to Hanji about it, but she's excitable enough as it is without someone feeding her the notion that we were all actually alive back then and we knew each other."

Erwin smiled at the mental picture of how Hanji would react. He couldn't really blame Levi for being reluctant to explain the truth to her. He was actually very surprised that the man came to him about this. Now that they'd gotten it out in the open, there was something Erwin needed confirmed even more than the origin of the titans and what was found in the basement.

"Levi, do you have any memories of what you and I were to each other, besides comrades in arms?"

The captain's pale features flushed lightly, and he averted his gaze. "Nothing."

Erwin tried to hide his disappointment, though he got the distinct feeling that Levi wasn't being entirely honest with him. "Are you sure about that?"

Levi visibly shivered, and he zipped his jacket the rest of the way up. He took a step back from Erwin, and he watched him almost warily. "There were feelings, all right? Stop looking at me like that."

"What sort of feelings?" urged the blond, getting dry-mouthed. It was so important to him that Levi admit it out loud. If they were meant to ever be together, it would happen, but Erwin felt like it stood a better chance of occurring if he could just get Levi to acknowledge it.

"Un-professional feelings." Levi folded his arms over his chest. "The kind that could have gotten us in trouble if the brass ever found out about it, all right? We never acted on them, if you're having trouble remembering that."

Erwin took a deep breath, and he nodded. "I remember it quite well. I remember the day when we mutually decided that our duty trumped our personal desire. It's a painful moment in that lifetime that I've been replaying in my mind over and over again since I recovered that memory."

Erwin took a step closer, and for a moment, he saw panic flash in the smaller man's eyes. He lowered his voice, and he dared to reach out and cup Levi's face in both hands. "I've been asking myself what would have happened, had we given in and kissed that day. Do you wonder the same, Levi?"

Another tremor went through the captain, and his throat worked as he swallowed. "Every fucking day since I had that dream, yeah. I also wonder if...if..."

"If what?" whispered Erwin. So close; they were so close. He ached to finish what they'd nearly started back in those days, but he sensed Levi's uncertainty, his confusion. "Please tell me. I need closure."

"I wonder if what I've been feeling for you is real, or if it's left over from this other life," finished Levi so quickly that the words nearly ran together. His tension eased, and he searched the blond's eyes. "You know how insane this is, right? We're standing here talking about reincarnation and living myths and flying through the air on fucking wires. Anybody hearing this conversation would have us both committed."

"Except for Hanji," guessed Erwin with a smirk.

"Yeah, except for her," conceded Levi, "but she's already crazy herself. I just...you have this fucking influence on me and I don't know what to make of it, and if you don't stop staring at me like that, I'm gonna—"

Erwin lost what little shred of composure he had left as Levi babbled the confession. He couldn't bear it any longer. He needed as much confirmation of his feelings as the captain did, and he couldn't go another day without it. Erwin closed the distance between their mouths, and he kissed Levi. He'd meant for it to be a quick, chaste kiss to test the waters, but the moment he felt the animated silk of Levi's lips against his, it was impossible to pull away. Erwin pressed his thumbs against Levi's narrow chin, prying his mouth open. He delved his tongue in the moment the smaller man's lips parted, and he couldn't tell which one of them groaned at the sensual contact of tongue against tongue. Levi's stillness only lasted for a moment before he had his arms around Erwin's neck. He crushed his mouth against the blond's, and due to their height difference, Erwin had to hunch over. He slid one hand down the captain's back, curling his tongue against Levi's.

They stayed lip-locked like that for several moments, until Levi abruptly broke the kiss and stared at Erwin with wide eyes. The captain opened his kiss-swollen lips as if he wanted to say something, but nothing came out except a soft, incoherent noise.

Then Levi was back in his arms again, practically climbing up Erwin's body as he clung to him. There teeth scraped together and their breath intermingled. Erwin embraced Levi tightly, lifting him against him with the wild notion of carrying him off somewhere to finally consummate the need they'd both denied themselves relief from. Erwin had completely forgotten where they were, so caught up in the moment that all propriety fled from him.

Evidently, Levi was suffering a similar lapse in judgment. He spoke huskily between kisses, sliding his hands over Erwin's broad chest. "Fuck, I want you. What the hell are you doing to me, Smith?"

Erwin started to pick him up, only to be reminded that Levi was no lightweight despite his small build. He grunted a bit with his effort, but he was determined to have this man. He started backing up toward the barn, and Levi was the one to regain his senses.

"Wait," gasped Levi, breaking the kiss again. "Hold up. We can't just fuck on a whim, Erwin."

"Why not?" pressed the blond, breathing heavily with his lust. "Haven't we waited for long enough? You can't tell me you don't want it as badly as I do." Indeed, Levi's body was reacting quite favorably, and Erwin thought of the wet dream the captain had about him, thought of the way he'd looked when in the throes of pleasure. He wanted to see that again, only he wanted to be directly responsible for his orgasm.

"Because we're guests on civilian property," stated Levi, "we don't have any sort of protection or lube, and we only just figured this shit out. I don't know about you, but I need a little time to sort this out. I'm not thrilled about the blue balls either, but we've got to use common sense."

Erwin groaned at the perfect logic presented to him. He wasn't concerned about catching any STD's from Levi, but there were hygiene issues to consider. The captain was right; now wasn't the time to let their libido rule their heads. Reluctantly, the blond released his companion. He took a steadying breath, feeling weak in the knees from making out with him.

"Pardon my behavior," Erwin said, well aware of how obscenely his crotch was poking out. "I was caught up in the moment, and this is a lot to absorb for both of us. I don't want to rush you."

"Oi, I was thinking with my dick too," admitted Levi. "I wasn't expecting that kiss to hit me so hard. Fuck, can you use that mouth."

Erwin smiled, still trying to calm his breathing. "I would love the chance to show you how many ways I can use my mouth some day, Levi."

Levi groaned softly. "Now why'd you have to say something like that? I'm gonna have a hard enough time getting this thing to go down before it dry-fires." He looked down pointedly at his crotch, which was in the same state of arousal as Erwin's.

That made the blond laugh, despite his sexual frustration and discomfort. "I'm only trying to give you incentive...and make you a promise."

Levi smirked at him. "I'll take your word for it. Hey Erwin, there's more we need to discuss about this. If we're going to go for it eventually, there's a few things we need to clear up."

"Such as?" Erwin didn't know if he could keep talking about this subject without losing his self-restraint again, but it seemed important to Levi.

"Do you like to take it or give it in the bedroom?" Levi asked bluntly.

Erwin didn't immediately understand what he was talking about. "Take or give what?"

The captain rolled his eyes, and Erwin got it. "Oh. You mean taking the bottom or the top role?"

"Yeah. Which do you usually prefer, or do you have a preference?"

Erwin hadn't expected this turn of the conversation. "I generally like to top. And you?"

Levi hesitated, seeming a bit uncertain. "The first time I'm with a guy, I like to top. Don't get me wrong though; I love a big dick inside of me and you've obviously got that covered." He glanced down at Erwin's crotch with a little smirk.

Erwin took the compliment to his endowments, with a small grin, looking down. "So does this mean you're willing to go for it sometime?"

Levi sighed, and he looked around at their surroundings. "Assuming we're ever in a situation to do it, you've convinced me." He tilted his head, gazing at Erwin curiously. "You didn't even bat a lash when I said I want to be on top the first time."

That surprised Erwin, too. Though he considered himself versatile, he did have his preference and he always imagined himself fucking Levi when he thought of it, not the other way around. He didn't mind doing it the other way, though. Not with the captain.

"I think that as long as it happens, I don't care how the encounter goes the first time," murmured the writer. He reached out to caress Levi's face with the back of his knuckles. "I just want you, even if it means we've still got some waiting to do."

Levi flushed again, and he bit his lip. "Yeah, well let's just see. We've agreed we're both interested and that we're probably not insane. I've got to check in with Hanji and see if she's got anymore news for us."

"I'll return to the barn in a moment," Erwin stated, glancing down at his crotch again. "I need to...calm down a bit more."

Levi said nothing about that, but he did toss one last smirk in that direction before walking away.

* * *

That evening, they sat down to a meal of potato and lamb stew. Levi, Hanji and Moblit ate in the loft of the barn so that they could discuss military matters without civilians listening in. Erwin ate downstairs with the others.

"Well, they figured out what went wrong," Hanji informed after dipping some bread in her stew. She took a bite out of it and swallowed while Levi and Moblit watched her curiously. "It wasn't sabotage from within our ranks."

Levi frowned. He'd already discussed the possibility with her earlier. "They've got proof of that?"

She nodded, and she had sip of water. "There was a distress call from Jinae on the day they deployed you there. Someone in that town said that the south Marian forces were planning to raid them, and they begged for Sinarian intervention. What we don't know is whether it was a genuine call for aid or deliberately orchestrated to set up our people."

"Didn't they try to track it?" Levi spooned up a mouthful of stew and had a bite.

"They did," answered Moblit, "and it originated in Jinae. They said it came from a woman that claimed to be a merchant, and when they asked her where she got her information from, she said she saw a hostile encampment in the hills while on her way to the next town over. She was going to trade some goods over there for winter supplies, but when she saw the place in flames and spotted the military encampment, she turned back around and went home to call for help."

Levi was suspicious. "How did she make it back without getting spotted and caught? How did she know who to contact to get us involved? What was her name?"

"Her name was Ivy something," answered Hanji. "I didn't catch the surname because the connection broke up. I don't know how she managed to avoid getting caught, and I can only assume she had contact numbers because this wasn't the first time we've been through their town."

Levi considered that. He did remember leaving information with the Innkeeper during their last visit, cleverly encoded so not just anyone could use it. He couldn't remember ever meeting anyone named Ivy, but that didn't mean one of his soldier's hadn't. Maybe they gave her emergency contact information, as well.

"So we've got three possibilities," sighed Levi at last. "The first, if we assume this girl's story was straight, is that it happened just as she said, and the opposing forces just didn't move in on Jinae right away. We just happened to still be there when they did, because there was a tangle in the deployment orders that delayed us just long enough to face a firefight."

Moblit nodded. "That's what I'm hoping for."

"It would be the best case scenario," agreed Hanji with a frown, "but the other possibility is that this Ivy person is actually with the enemy. She may have made that call to lure a squad in for the slaughter."

"Or she _did_ get caught and the southern insurgents forced her to make contact," theorized Levi grimly. "Either way, I still feel like something was too convenient about this. You can bet they know we'll be sending in retaliation, too. Unless they've managed to pull in extra forces, chances are they won't stick around once they've finished looting and pillaging that place."

Hanji sighed, nodding. "That's a distinct possibility. I've asked for air transport to come and collect us on the way. I want to be there when they take back Jinae...or what's left of it. People are going to need medical help, if there are any survivors."

"I'm going too," said Levi, all but forgetting the rest of his meal. "Those are my men we left back there, and I owe them proper funeral rites, if not rescue."

They all three fell silent after that, each wondering what they would find when they made it back to Jinae.

* * *

-To be continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hasty proofread on this one, so I'll give it another look after work to correct any errors I might have missed.
> 
> End of chapter recap:
> 
> Levi: "Disgusting. I've got crusty dried cum in my pants and Erwin's giving me a funny look."
> 
> Erwin: *Can't stop thinking of Levi's 'O' face*
> 
> Levi: "Shit! He died, and I let it happen!"
> 
> Erwin: "Levi? L-Levi, are you crying?"
> 
> Levi: "No, and don't tell anyone what you didn't just see, got it?"
> 
> Erwin: "...okay..."
> 
> Hanji: "Heeeeyyy! Did someone order a tank?"
> 
> Levi: "WTF, how did you manage that?"
> 
> Hanji: "Wasn't easy. Climb aboard, guys."
> 
> Levi: "That's it, I've got to tell him. But if I do, it means I'm admitting something so crazy I might as well..."
> 
> Erwin: "Tell me what, Levi?"
> 
> Levi: "Uh...your fly's unzipped."
> 
> Erwin: "No it isn't."
> 
> Levi: "All right, fine! I've been dreaming about you. It hasn't stopped since you got here."
> 
> Erwin: "You have?"
> 
> Levi: "Why do you look so happy? Hey, keep your distance. No, don't kiss me!"
> 
> Levi: "...okay, do that again."
> 
> Erwin: "Let's find somewhere private."
> 
> Levi: "We can't do that, have you lost your mind?"
> 
> Erwin: *sigh* "Let's wait some more, then."


	9. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short, melancholy chapter. Don't worry; there's plenty more to come!

They took advantage of an outdoor wood-burning heater that night to stave off the cold in the barn. The farmer's wife brought out extra winter blankets for them, and they all huddled around the heat source as they slept restlessly on the ground. Levi was just starting to fall asleep when he felt a tall, warm body wriggle up behind him. He turned his head, almost hoping it was Hanji that squirmed over to him. It wasn't. He could see Erwin's blond hair sticking up out of the top of the blanket. He started to scooch away out of fear that his body would misbehave again with the contact, but Levi was already fairly close to the heater. Any closer and he might accidentally bump into it and burn any exposed part of him. Erwin's arm went around him, and the captain flushed as the blond pulled him back against his chest, spooning him intimately.

"Smith," whispered Levi, nudging him.

Erwin mumbled something, and his lips pressed a kiss against the back of Levi's neck that caused a shiver to race through him. Levi bit his lip, and he found himself settling his hand over Erwin's beneath the covers as the bigger man laid it over his stomach. Levi could hear Hanji's soft snores a few feet away, and he glanced in her direction to see that she was snuggled up against Moblit. Everyone was huddled together, so there was nothing wrong with him and Erwin sharing body warmth—in theory. The difference was that one of them was a mother and daughter, another was a husband and wife, and though Moblit harbored some romantic feelings for Hanji, the man knew they weren't returned.

Levi and Erwin were mutually very much in lust, if not love. Levi still couldn't quite accept that he was in love with the man, simply because of the strangeness of their situation. He'd never believed in fairy tales, mythology or ghost stories, and yet he couldn't deny the warmth he felt in the man's embrace, or how perfectly their bodies molded together.

A throb went through Levi as he felt Erwin's groin stir against his ass. The barrier of clothing between them didn't do much to conceal it, and Levi's tension began to mount when Erwin burrowed a hand up underneath his shirt. He could have gotten up and moved to a different location. He didn't have to put up with this groping in the dark, and yet, Levi couldn't make himself move. He bit his lip again as the bigger man's fingers glided in a tickling yet sensual manner over his abdomen. Levi slipped his hand down to Erwin's wrist with the intention of pulling him away, but he only held it. His breath caught softly as Erwin's fingers located a nipple and traced it, causing a tingle of pleasure and lust to shoot through him. The writer placed another kiss on the back of Levi's neck, and he whispered the captain's name so softly that it could barely be heard.

Why was he allowing this? He'd already told Erwin earlier that day that they couldn't get touchy-feely with each other, that they would have to wait for a more appropriate time to think about exploring this. Erwin appeared to be asleep, though, so Levi couldn't exactly blame him. The captain had a wet dream about Erwin the night before, after all. Came in his pants from it, too. He couldn't judge his commander for wanting a little touch in his sleep.

Levi froze as soon as he thought of Erwin as his commander. Those old feelings were coming back with a vengeance, and a big part of him just wanted to give in, wake Erwin up and find some place private with him to quench this thirst.

"Erwin," Levi breathed, again trying half-heartedly to deter the other man's attentions. He swallowed when Erwin burrowed his other arm beneath him, embracing him with both and wedging one powerful leg between Levi's. Lying on his arm was uncomfortable, but Levi got distracted from that when the hand attached to that arm slid down his body and cupped his groin. He went perfectly still, and a familiar feeling of indecisive panic welled up within him. He wanted it, but he was afraid of it. It could be the biggest mistake in his life to get involved with this guy, but it could also be the biggest blessing in his life.

Levi brought his hand to his mouth to suppress a groan as Erwin began to knead his hardening crotch with one hand, while fondling his nipple with the other. Thankfully, Hanji's snores were loud enough to overpower the muffled sounds Levi was making as his lust and need steadily climbed. Erwin was subtly grinding against the captain in his sleep, and he murmured his name. Levi started to tremble—not with cold, but with the effort to hold himself in check. He started rubbing against Erwin's groping hand, his hips rocking and his torso curving. His other nipple started getting the same attention as the first. Now they were both hard as pebbled, and the heat in Levi's face expanded as the sensation made his stomach clench.

He started pushing his ass back against Erwin's tempting hardness, unconsciously encouraging the frottage. The blond's breath was accelerating, hot and damp against the nape of Levi's neck. Erwin groaned, and Levi twisted and turned his head to speak against Erwin's lips.

"Shh, you'll wake everyone up," cautioned Levi.

He had to quit this. He'd wriggle out of Erwin's embrace, go outside to cool off, and then find another spot away from the man to bed down for the night. He would—

Levi found himself pulling the covers up above them both, rather than following through with his more practical and sensible idea. Now covered completely with their heads out of sight as well, Levi pressed his lips against Erwin's to stifle the sounds of need coming from the man. It worked for his own vocalizations, too. Their tongues met and caressed, and Levi put his hands over the ones busily feeling him up beneath the covers.

One last, fleeting particle of sense sparked in the back of the captain's mind, and this time, he followed through with it instead of letting his libido rule him. He firmly yet gently grabbed Erwin's hands in his, threading his fingers through the larger ones. He pulled them away from his sensitive parts, and he broke the kiss to whisper to his companion.

"Calm down. You're asleep, Erwin. this isn't the time."

Still breathing heavily, Erwin didn't come out of his doze right away. Levi decided it was time to get a little rough to make his point. He let go of the commander's right hand, and he jabbed him in the gut with his elbow, just hard enough to make him grunt and startle him out of sleep.

"Huh?" Erwin gasped, his head lifting with surprise. He took his arm out from beneath Levi, pulled the cover off his head and peered around with bleary confusion.

"You were making noise in your sleep," explained Levi, "and you were squirming around too much."

The blond looked down at Levi, who was on his side with his head turned so that the could gaze up at him. He seemed to recall where they were and why, and he lay back down. "I'm sorry. I must have been dreaming."

"Tch, no shit," muttered the captain. Now that the danger appeared to have passed, Levi rolled over to face him. He stared at Erwin in the flickering, dim light from the heater, and he sighed. It would have been so easy to forget himself in the moment and let Erwin keep going until they both came in their pants, but not only would that have risked discovery, it would have also meant they'd both have a crusty mess to clean up in the morning with limited means to do so.

Erwin watched Levi back, and a little smile grew on his lips, lighting up the blue of his eyes.

"What?" whispered Levi gruffly, flushing again under that stare. He scooted away a little, realizing that his package was still hard and Erwin had probably felt it against his leg.

"It was a good dream," answered the blond softly.

"Oi," Levi hissed in protest when Erwin put an arm around him and pulled him closer. He tried not to make his condition obvious, but their bodies were once again flush against each other's and there was just no way to hide his lingering boner. Erwin still had his, too. Levi felt the outline of it distinctly against his stomach.

"We need to share body warmth," reasoned Erwin. "Remember?"

Levi sighed. "You weren't just sharing body warmth," he muttered, "you were groping me."

Erwin blinked. "Was I?"

His expression was so earnestly surprised that Levi believed he hadn't been aware of it. "Yeah, so try to keep the hands in one place."

"My apologies," whispered Erwin. He rested his chin on the crown of Levi's head. He was still quite hard against the smaller man's stomach, but he kept his hold on him more chaste.

Levi lay there thinking for a while, thinking of how good it felt, how safe and comfortable. He started to drift off to sleep, listening to the steady beat of Erwin's heart against his ear. A part of him wondered if Erwin really had been completely oblivious to his behavior, but then Levi thought about the wet dream he'd had that day they'd huddled up together in the woods, and how much of a gentleman Erwin had been about it, even though he had to have realized something was going on.

Levi chose not to dwell on it. Instead, he indulged himself by pretending they weren't in some barn out in the middle of nowhere, in a country they didn't belong in and surrounded by enemies on all sides. He wasn't good at pretending, but it was comforting to think that perhaps one day, he and Erwin might lay like this together in a warm bed, far away from this war.

* * *

The next morning, Erwin awoke to the smell of frying eggs and sausage. His stomach growled and he sat up, wincing with soreness over sleeping on the hard barn floor. The blankets had helped, but not by much in the way of padding. Levi's warmth was gone, which came as no surprise to him. He sat up and stretched, and he started to reach for his laptop bag to fish out his dream journal, only to realize he hadn't had any dreams of his past life. He'd had that steamy dream with Levi, but he could tell that one was a product of his own desire and imagination, rather than a past-life memory. There was no doubt in his mind that he had never touched Levi Ackerman that intimately before.

Sighing a little at the reminder of his frustration and longing, Erwin shoved himself off the pity pot and got up to shake out his blankets. He folded them neatly, and he placed them with the other borrowed blankets he saw stacked on top of a storage crate against the wall. The only other people still sleeping in the barn was the old couple, and Erwin left as quietly as he could so as not to disturb them.

Just outside the barn, the captain was sitting down on a log with a plate of food. Hanji and Moblit had joined them. Of the woman and her child from the Inn, there was no sign. Erwin saw one of the boys from the farm family busily scattering hay in the nearby pig paddock. His younger sister was milking a cow in the stable. The parents and the youngest child must be in the house with the woman from Jinae and her daughter.

"Here, Erwin," offered Hanji when she saw him approach. "I brought a plate for you. Sit down and have some breakfast!"

Erwin scrubbed his fingers through his hair, well-aware that it was mussed. What he wanted was a sink, a comb, and the chance to brush his teeth as well as shave again. Food was probably more important, though. He thanked Hanji with a sleepy smile, and he took a seat next to Moblit to start digging in.

"Did everyone sleep well?" he inquired as he speared a sausage with the fork given to him.

"I have straw in places that will remain unmentionable," chuckled Hanji. "At least it was indoors and relatively warm, though. How about you?"

The medic's russet gaze swept over Erwin slyly. "You two were bundled up together like a pair of burritos, when I woke up."

"So what?" huffed Levi. He took a sip of hot beverage from his thermos. "Everyone was bundled up last night. It got below freezing out here."

Hanji shrugged. "True, true. I'm just not used to seeing you sleep so soundly, grump."

"I was tired," excused Levi, closely examining his drinking cup as if looking for foreign objects in it.

Hange leaned across Moblit to wink conspiringly at Erwin. "Oh, he was 'tired'."

Moblit cleared his throat. "Excuse me." He got up, and he offered to take Hanji's plate. He looked at Levi, who was giving Hanji a withering look. "Captain, are you finished with yours?"

Levi finished his last bite of egg, nodded, and handed his plate and utensil over for Moblit to take back to the house.

Hanji studied both of her companions with barely concealed amusement as Levi and Erwin carefully avoided looking at one another. She cleared her throat. "So Erwin, how's the writing coming along? Can I expect a new publication on the shelves by next year?"

Erwin chewed thoughtfully on his sausage, and then he smiled at the farmer's daughter when she brought him a tin cup offering of fresh milk. He drank a swallow down before answering Hanji. "I hope so. It's not coming along as quickly as I expected."

"Oh?" Hanji leaned forward with interest, planting her hands on her knees. "Not enough inspiration, or is it a little overwhelming?"

Levi was now looking at him as well, and Erwin paused. "Both," he admitted. He was getting some fantastic story ideas, but they weren't about the present war at all. "I'm having trouble staying focused."

Hanji nodded with apparent understanding. "It can get tough to detail everything that happens here. I have to document every clinical case, and sometimes I have trouble with the date and times. I'd like to have a computer floating around behind me, automatically documenting everything I do in case I screw up."

Erwin smiled at her. He could picture the image in his head, and he got a funny moment of imagining Hanji arguing with a computer when it put in data she didn't find pertinent. "It would never make it."

The medic chuckled, her voice deep and husky with amusement. "Yeah, you're probably right. I'm more forgiving of human mistakes than technology."

Erwin started to say something, but the words froze on his lips at the sound of approaching jets. Levi immediately sprang up from his seat, and he ushered Erwin and Hanji into the barn. Erwin nearly spilled his half-eaten breakfast as the captain practically manhandled him out of sight.

"Duck down," urged Levi, shoving Erwin towards the nearest hay bale.

Hanji had already squatted near the barn entrance and drawn her gun, suddenly all business. Erwin squatted as directed by Levi, one hand resting immediately on the handle of the semi-automatic pistol he'd been given by the captain. Levi got down on one knee, on the opposite side of Hanji. He pulled his rifle free and he clicked the bullet chamber, staring down the scope with his head cocked to one side.

"It's one of ours," Hanji shouted, just as the old couple from Jinae awoke and staggered to their feet in confusion. "It's okay! We're safe."

Erwin conveyed the information to the elderly couple as quickly as he could, seeing panic on both of their lined faces. The jet came screaming past overhead, and Erwin got up and stepped outside next to Hanji to watch the sleek black vessel go. Levi soon joined them, along with the couple in the barn. Two more jets came by, trailing white lines.

"And here I thought they weren't taking us seriously enough," Hanji stated, shielding her eyes from the sun with a flattened hand. "Whoohoo! Go get 'em, boys!"

Hanji's exuberance faded quickly, though. Only now did Erwin realize how close their location was to Jinae. Just as he was about to ask a question to his companions, he saw missiles streak out from the three jets, twisting through the air and heading on a deadly, obvious path.

Hanji stopped hopping up and down, and she put a hand to her mouth. Moblit came charging from the house just across the field, yelling. Everything seemed to happen in slow-motion after that.

"Hanji!" Moblit yelled, skidding to a halt before his superior. He gestured wildly at the aircrafts circling around the town to the west. "They're just going to bomb it?"

Hanji, with one hand still plastered to her mouth, looked at Levi with wide, pleading eyes. "L-Levi?"

The captain stood stock-still, eyes narrowed on the sight of his own military carrying out orders that he obviously wasn't expecting. His shoulders were tense, and his jaw was locked with quiet distress. He looked not at Hanji, but at Erwin. There was something subtly pleading in his gray eyes that struck the blond to the core.

"You wanted to know what we do out here, Smith?" Levi nodded toward the destruction happening on the horizon. "There's your fucking answer."

Erwin couldn't move. He could hardly even breathe. He heard the elderly woman behind him give a choked sob, and her husband put his arms around her and said something in Marian that Erwin couldn't even translate at the moment. His brain seemed to be frozen, and he could only watch in horror as explosions lit up the mid-morning sky. The farmer's daughter—the one that had brought him a cup of fresh milk—came up beside him. The girl pressed close to him in fear, and Erwin impulsively reached down to put a hand on her delicate shoulder, hardly noticing the way she hugged his thigh as if seeking protection. He kept his eyes on the carnage, and the harsh reality of what this war brought with it sunk in with sharp teeth.

"This isn't justice," he whispered, and his words were lost in the sound of protesting voices and explosions.

Levi stood like a statue through it all, seemingly stoic, but Erwin thought he detected a faint glimmer of unshed tears lining those tired gray eyes.

* * *

It was living hell. That was the only description Erwin could come up with for what he saw. The transport helicopter arrived shortly after they unleashed the missiles on Jinae. He boarded it with Levi, Hanji and Moblit, and they were flown to the burning ruins of what remained of the town. He saw Hanji leap out before the chopper even touched down, and Moblit faithfully followed. Once they grounded, Levi got out and immediately began searching for survivors from his platoon. Erwin watched the captain kneel before charred corpses, watched him snap the fire-blasted dog-tags off of fallen soldiers, and the sight was painful and familiar.

Erwin's vision blurred with tears as he saw Levi scoop up a fallen female soldier and carry her gently to one of the other choppers. He could see the weight of it on the captain's soot-stained, pale features. He watched Levi give up his soldier to the apparent collectors of the dead, saw him give a sharp salute, and his heart ached for him.

_He's had enough. Stop this. Stop making him bury people!_

But it wouldn't stop just because Erwin wished for it to. The counter-attack on Jinae had been brutal and indiscriminate. Civilians, enemies and allied soldiers were all reduced to the same status in that violent act. As Erwin watched Hanji tend to the wounded, weep over the dead and do what she could to keep the injured alive, the lines seemed to blur further. Erwin watched her comfort a dying insurgent, holding his hand and weeping as he expired. He saw Moblit carrying the body of a child to the chopper collecting the dead. There was no way they would have enough room for all of the dead. They would have to make another round or call in more transport.

The thought that they were trying to carry the dead of both locals and soldiers to be properly laid to rest was of no comfort to Erwin. His chest felt tight, and he looked at Levi with devastated blue eyes as the captain approached him, stone-faced and sickly-looking.

"Go home," advised Levi tightly. "You've seen enough, sacrificed enough. You don't need this, Erwin."

Erwin swallowed hard. He wanted to tell Levi that he couldn't abandon him, that he needed someone, and then his gaze flickered to Hanji when the woman let out a wail of pure frustration. Hanji was tearing at her messy ponytail, having just lost another patient to his injuries. Moblit had put his arms around her comfortingly, and he was rocking her, stopping her self-destructive actions. Hanji hugged him close, burying her dirty, tear-streaked face against his chest as she mumbled incoherently.

Yes. Erwin had seen quite enough, and a lot of it was all too close to what he'd witnessed before. A lot of this was of his own doing in the past, and that murdered a part of his soul to admit it.

"Erwin, go home," urged Levi again.

The blond looked at his diminutive companion, feeling lost within himself. Stained with blood and soot, Levi appeared every bit the hero to him. That sadness hidden within those pale eyes struck Erwin profoundly, and he thought he might soon break from it.

"Levi..."

"Hold on a minute." Levi's expression suddenly hardened, and his eyes fixated on something to Erwin's left.

The writer had enough time to turn and watch Levi stride up to a man that had just stepped out of a chopper, and the next thing Erwin knew, Levi threw a hard left-hook at the man's dimpled chin.

"You motherfucking son of a bitch," exclaimed Levi, bearing his teeth. He was then all over this uniformed man whom Erwin was completely oblivious of identity. People shouted. Soldiers tried to pull Levi off of the man; whom he was now pummeling with obvious fury.

"Oh shit..."

Erwin heard the blurted expletive from Hanji as she crowded up next to him. Apparently, Levi's sudden fracas with another officer distracted her from her situation.

"Levi, cut it out!" Hanji warned as the captain got dog-piled under a crowd of soldiers.

Levi was apparently beyond reasoning. He was forcibly dragged off of the man he'd assaulted, and as Erwin impulsively stepped forward to assist him, Hanji grabbed him around the mid-section and Moblit joined her.

"No. Erwin, don't get involved!"

Practically blinded with rage at the sight of people manhandling Levi, it took Erwin a moment to digest the fact that he now had two people clinging to him. He yelled out, angered and sick and worried. "Stop it!"

Amazingly, the chaos did die down. Whether it was from his indignant roar or something else, he couldn't say. Levi was getting handcuffed, and blood was trickling from his left nostril.

"You knew," Levi stated in a raw voice, looking up at the man he'd attacked. The soldier in question was composing himself, with his left eye already swelling and a busted lip.

"Command decision," stated the man.

"My soldiers," Levi gasped, "these people. You fucking asshole, you ordered the attack!"

Erwin felt bile rise in his stomach, and he swallowed it down. Hanji and Moblit were both still clinging to him like kudzu vines, though he knew there was nothing at this point he could possibly do for Levi. Still, he had words at his disposal.

"How can you justify this? You've blown away children, as well as your own soldiers! There's no—"

Something hit Erwin hard in the back of the head at that moment. He saw stars, swiftly followed by a deep, blessed blackness.

* * *

Levi watched over Erwin as they flew past the ruins of Jinae. He gave Hanji an accusing look, to which she shrugged and said: "I did it for his own good! Stop glaring at me, shorty."

"Did you have to hit him so fucking hard?" demanded Levi, straining against the cuffs. "Christ, you crazy bitch. He could have a concussion."

"No, he's fine," assured the medic. "I checked. You need to worry abou—"

Erwin groaned and shifted at that moment, efficiently wrecking the exchange. Hanji bent over him with a worried look while Levi glared at her.

"Hey, Erwin! We were just talking about you. Rise and shine!"

"I'm going to kick everyone's ass," promised Erwin, "as soon as I find my feet again."

Levi couldn't help but smirk. "Yeah, you do that, big guy."

Erwin looked at the captain, and his blue eyes were contemplative as he realized Levi was cuffed. He glanced at the nearby soldiers before speaking. "They're putting you under arrest?"

Levi shrugged as best as he could. "I struck a fellow officer. I have to deal with the consequences."

His throat ached as he thought of the people he'd lost. Of all the soldiers from his platoon, only six had been confirmed alive. The rest were either MIA or dead. Anger boiled within him at the thought. How many of those soldiers got killed in friendly fire? How many might have been rescued, if their own people hadn't firebombed that town? How many civilian lives got lost in that overly aggressive counterstrike?

"Levi." Erwin said his name softly...almost too softly to be heard over the sound of the helicopter's rotors.

Levi met the blond's gaze, and he came to a decision. "You should go home, Erwin. When we touch down, make arrangements to get back to Sina."

Erwin's features hardened. "I came here for a purpose."

Levi drew a deep breath, and he shook his head. "You came to see for yourself what's really going on here. You've done that. Get the fuck out while you can, Smith. You can't fix this shit with words, and it's only going to get worse."

When Erwin just kept staring at him, Levi sighed. He couldn't really say everything that he wanted to say in mixed company, so he kept it subtle and he hoped Erwin would catch the underlying meaning. "You've been through enough. You've already seen more than most people will ever see, and there's nothing more you can do here. Go home, write your book and enjoy having some peace in your life."

"I haven't gotten enough material to finish my book," stated Erwin stubbornly, comprehension leaking into his gaze. He seemed to get the connotation that Levi wasn't referring to his present life experiences. "You may also need someone to testify for you, and I'm not prepared to leave you to face punishment without all the fairness you can receive."

Levi clenched his jaw. Willful, stubborn, loyal asshole. He didn't know why he'd expected Erwin to agree without a fight, considering the things that the man had sacrificed in his past life. "I'll be fine. Hanji and Moblit can give their account of what happened when I face the tribunal. There's a lot worse I could be getting charged with than striking a fellow officer, Smith. I might have to go to the klink for a little while, but they need all the soldiers they can get and I doubt I'll be court marshaled over this. As for not having enough material for a book, you and I both know that's not true. It just might not be the story you originally planned on writing."

Again, comprehension leaked into Erwin's handsome features. "You're right," he said so softly that Levi had to strain to hear him. "I _do_ have enough writing material for a book. However—"

"No," interrupted Levi firmly, shaking his head. "There's no 'however'. There's no point in you staying here, Erwin. You've already narrowly avoided death more than once. You don't belong here, and I can't be responsible for your safety anymore."

 _"I can't watch you die again,"_ Levi's eyes said as he held the other man's gaze.

"You should listen to him, dear," Hanji said, chiming in herself. She nodded at her quiet companion. "Moblit and I have Levi's back. Don't we?"

Moblit nodded. "Absolutely. They're right, Mr. Smith. Personally, if I'd known just how bad this war was going to get, I might not have enlisted. You've been really brave, but you have no obligation to stay here, and the captain already has enough on his plate without trying to protect you, if you'll pardon my saying so."

Erwin looked between the three of them, and his eyes settled on Levi again. Regret shone in those blue orbs, and his resolve visibly wavered. "I never intended to be a burden."

Levi bit his lip. "You weren't a burden. You did well, okay? You did your part helping out, you fought when you had to fight. You could have done a lot worse. Time for you to hang it up though and get the hell out of here, while you're still in one piece."

Erwin finally stopped arguing with him, though his eyes revealed sincere concern for Levi. The captain wished he could do more to reassure Erwin, but for now, he was simply grateful that the man was listening to reason and would soon be on a plane back home. That was all Levi really cared about right now; keeping his former commander and potential lover safe. He couldn't do so in the previous life, but he could do so in this one.

* * *

They landed at a military base in neutral territory to the south. Erwin tried once more to change Levi's mind before going through with making arrangements to get back to Mitras. Levi snapped at him like a drill sergeant, and then they took him away to be contained until his trial. Erwin barely even got the chance to say goodbye to him, and that broke his heart. In fact, the blond had to find a bathroom to sit in until he could compose himself, otherwise he feared he might actually weep in front of people. Hanji and Moblit escorted Erwin to the helicopter that would take him to Shiganshina and the airport, and they exchanged hugs of farewell with him. Hanji got Erwin's contact information, and she promised to send him word when possible concerning Levi's trial.

It was one of the hardest things Erwin had ever done in this life, to set foot on that helicopter and fly away from the man that fate had reunited him with, only to take him away again. He watched dully through the window as they lifted off, and Hanji and Moblit waved goodbye. Nothing about it felt right, but Erwin retained his stoicism, if for no other reason than to honor Levi's wishes. That was the only thing that gave him the strength to leave, and he took one of the sedatives Hanji had supplied him with once he made it to Shiganshina and booked a hotel room to stay in overnight.

He took the first flight out the next morning, and while on his plane, Erwin powered up his laptop and opened up his writing program. He didn't expect anything to come to him. He felt a dull pain in his heart, and he didn't feel particularly motivated to write anything. Before he knew it, though, the words started to flow with surprising ease. He began to write a different story to the one he'd originally intended, using his notes from his dream journal records to assist him.

Erwin had no further dreams about Levi and their past lives together, and he wondered if that was a sign that he might never see him again.

* * *

-To be continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> End of chapter humorous recap:
> 
> Erwin: (-, – )…zzzZZZ "I'm totally asleep and not at all aware that I'm feeling you up."
> 
> Levi: (;_) "Erwin, stop feeling me up! Oi!" *proceeds to cock-block himself yet again*
> 
> Erwin: "Damn it, I've been thwarted."
> 
> Hanji: "Oh yeah, you were just 'tired', Levi. I buy it...not."
> 
> Moblit: (;-_-)/ "I'll go wash these dishes to avoid an uncomfortable situation."
> 
> Hanji: "Yes! Score! We won this...oh shit...what are they doing?"
> 
> Levi: "This isn't 'winning'."
> 
> Erwin: "I'm about to rant."
> 
> Hanji: "No, you're not." *thunk*
> 
> Erwin: "I'm going to kill you all."
> 
> Hanji: "Oh, you don't mean that."
> 
> Erwin: "Fuck this shit, I'm out of here."
> 
> Hanji: "I'd be out of here right with you if I could, big guy. Go home." 
> 
> Levi: "What she said. ^^"


	10. Chapter 9

Erwin tried to go back to life as usual once he returned home. Nile and Marie were both surprised to get word that he was coming back so soon, but relieved. Like Erwin, they had expected him to be away for at least a month longer than he was. He himself was having trouble accepting that it had only been for a couple of weeks. It had certainly felt longer than that. Returning to his little rental house was a small comfort to him. The familiar, cozy surroundings did sooth him, and he hardly setting foot outside his property, except to buy groceries. Since he could work from home, Erwin found no need. He would usually go to one of his favorite parks to do some writing, when the weather was nice enough. This time of year it certainly was, but he had his own little nook in the back near his koi pond that he could relax by.

He took some small journalism commissions to keep his cash inflow steady while he worked on his next book. Erwin received bi-monthly royalties for previous novels he'd written, but only one of those really paid well, and that was the book about the titans. With that in mind, he decided it wasn't a bad idea at all to use his experiences in Maria for a journal rather than a book. As for his new novel, he thought Levi had the right idea. He had enough material in his head about his past life experiences to write a lengthy, descriptive story about the Survey Corps, the walled settlement and the titan wars. It would have to be labeled as fiction, of course. That didn't bother him.

He'd already written the introduction and most of the first chapter on the plane. Now that he was settled in at home, he could really get into it. He'd meant for it to be a fantasy adventure story, but as it progressed page by page, he realized it was fast becoming what could only be described as a post-apocalyptic, drama/romance. That almost amused him. He'd written fictional pieces before, but never had he considered himself a romance writer. His stories tended to stick with facts, legends and theories, without anyone coupling up in them, except perhaps in brief mention. He'd written poetry before, but not about any specific person except for one time in high school for Marie.

Now, as his words appeared on his computer screen faster than ever before, Erwin's thoughts remained on Levi. He could see his own passion influencing his writing style. It wasn't his usual, more clinical way of writing at all. It was almost like watching over the shoulder of some other writer. Erwin began to realize that this was so different from his usual writing because he was speaking from the heart in ways that he'd always held back, before. He wasn't just making up a tale; he was giving detailed accounts from his own memory, but with a writer's flair.

"Damn, this is going to be good," muttered the blond to himself as he started on chapter three. The certainty of that only briefly made him giddy, because he still hadn't had another dream of Levi since returning home, and it had been two days by now without any word from Hanji or anyone else concerning Levi's situation.

* * *

A full week passed before Erwin finally got some news about Maria and what had become of Levi and the others. He was finally out of the house, practically dragged out to a local Fall festival by Nile and Marie. He wasn't really up for going out anywhere, but they both insisted that he get out and stop being a hermit. He drank pumpkin spiced beer, ate a turkey leg and watched patiently as the couple took a ride on the Ferris Wheel. He envied his friends, envied their relationship and their devotion to each other. Sometimes he even resented it a little.

Erwin sighed as he caught sight of them kissing on the way back up to the top of the wheel, and he foolishly imagined himself and Levi doing that. Maybe it was just never to be. Maybe it was just their fate to always long for each other from a far, but never to _be_ together. Perhaps the world just wasn't ready for them to be a couple, because there were too many things they both had to do that would get in the way.

Erwin's morose thoughts got interrupted when his cell phone went off, and he gave a start. He reached for the case secured to his belt so quickly that he nearly dropped the device, and his eyes widened when he saw the number on the contact screen. It came up as an unknown number, and he tried to quell his excitement. It could just be a marketer calling from a long-distance hub to try and sell him something.

"Hello, this is Erwin Smith," he answered automatically.

At first, he didn't get a response. Then Hanji's blessed voice came through after Erwin repeated his greeting. "Erwin? Oh, thank God. I've been trying to reach you for the past two days now. The first couple of times I must have gotten the time zone difference wrong and tried in the middle of the night. Then we moved locations, and I've been having a bitch of a time getting some reception. How are you?"

Erwin had parted his lips several times to ask how _she_ was, and if everything was okay with Levi and Moblit, but Hanji had spoken in such a rush he couldn't get a word in edgewise. "I'm fine, Hanji." He smiled, happy to hear from her. He sobered quickly though as he realized her anxious babbling could mean something bad for Levi. "How is Levi? How is Moblit?"

"Moblit is fine; he's with me on another base," explained the medic after a moment. There seemed to be a bit of delay in their connection, which was understandable given the distance. "Levi had his trial yesterday. I wanted to let you know it was starting and give you the results right away, but you know..."

Erwin nodded. "I understand. So what happened?" He was getting tense waiting for her to get to the point.

"Well, thanks to some testimonies from yours truly, Moblit and a few others, along with the support of our high commander, Levi's been put on a brief probationary period. He won't be court marshaled, as we feared he might. Commander Moss proposed a leave of absence for some R&R instead, and he got the brass to approve it."

Erwin sighed, and he quickly sat down on a nearby bench when the tension he hadn't realized he'd been holding in bled out of him. "Really? That's much better than what could have happened."

"Indeed it is," agreed Hanji solemnly. "They're going to further investigate into the command decisions that led to the air strike against Jinae. That shouldn't have happened, and Levi punching the officer that headed it is small potatoes compared to the casualties of both our soldiers and local civilians as a result."

Hanji sighed. "They're trying to clean it up, Erwin, but I don't know how much we can expect. That's all I can really say about it."

"I understand," Erwin assured her. She was probably giving him more information than she had clearance to give, as it was. "Where will Levi be taking his R&R?" He didn't even know where Levi currently lived, now that he thought of it. He was obviously from somewhere in Sina, but they'd never gotten the chance to touch on exactly where.

"That's the beauty of it," crowed Hanji with mischievous excitement. "Because of his outstanding service...well, minus socking that officer...they're willing to send him anywhere he wants to go for a week. I think our commander knows how stressed the captain's become, and he feels a little responsible, since he was the one that sent Levi's squad to Jinae. Knowing the runt though, he'll pick some place with rock climbing or some other extreme, outdoor sport. He really should be using this time to just rest, don't you think?"

Erwin felt a bit of dismay over the thought of Levi not even considering visiting him, but he knew Hanji was leading somewhere with this. "Yes, I agree. He should go someplace where he can unwind and take his mind off this war for a while."

"Maybe somewhere with a friend," suggested Hanji slyly. "Someone that wouldn't mind spoiling him a bit, hmm?"

Erwin started to smile, helplessly thrilled by the thought of it. "Yes. Perhaps even a friend that would be willing to open his home to him and show him the sights in the capital."

"Just so we're clear," Hanji said, "this friend we're talking about is you, yes?"

Erwin chuckled. "Correct. I don't know if he would go for it, but please let him know that the offer is open."

"Pfft, he'll go for it," Hanji assured him. "He might try to play it off like he's reluctant at first, but I know the tiny captain. He'll cave. He's still got your book that I lent him, by the way. He's already finished it, but I told him to keep it when he didn't seem too thrilled about giving it back."

That warmed Erwin's heart, and he didn't even realize how broadly he was smiling when his friends stepped off of the Ferris Wheel to re-join him. They stood politely back when they saw that he was in a phone conversation, waiting for him to finish.

"Thank you, Hanji, for keeping me up to date. You still have all of my contact information, don't you?"

"Mm-hmm, including email address and home address. I'll be sure and pass it on to Levi. Now, don't expect to hear from him right away, because you know how he's got to over-think certain things. He's got a few days to decide on his destination, so I'd say give him about four and then if you still don't hear from him, get in touch with me."

"Hanji, I don't have this number," reminded Erwin. "It came up as 'unknown'."

"Oh! That's because I'm using a landline for this call. The number I gave you before you left is the one you want to use. You might not be able to get through thanks to reception in some areas around here, but if you leave me an email, voice mail or text, I'll get it eventually and can get back to you as soon as possible."

"Oh, I see." Feeling foolish for not considering that, Erwin flushed. "Well, thank you very much for the call."

"Absolutely. I'm just sorry I couldn't reach you sooner. You take care, big guy."

"You as well," responded Erwin. "Please be careful out there. I would like for us all to meet up again some day in the future and spend time together under better circumstances."

"Me too," she sighed. "Well, I've got to skedaddle. My new commanding officer is giving me the eyeball and pointing at his watch. Better not tempt fate."

"Of course. Until next time, Hanji."

Erwin ended the call and put his phone away. He saw the inquisitive smirks on both his friends' faces when he finished, and it was then that he realized he was grinning like he had a coat hangar in his mouth.

"You look like you just won the lottery," observed Marie. "I know it's not our business, but we haven't seen you smile like that since before you left for Maria. Share with us?"

Erwin chose his words carefully, remembering that these two had no memories of their past lives, like he, Levi and apparently Hanji did. "One of the officers that I befriended while overseas is getting some time out of his tour. He might come here for his R&R, at least for a couple of days. If so, I'll have a house guest for a little while."

Erwin hadn't thought of the possibility of Levi having family he might want to go home to for a while, and it dawned on him that he couldn't expect to monopolize the man's entire leave from combat if that were so.

"You seem really excited about it," observed Marie with a smile. "You must have really hit it off with this guy. Could it be you've found a special someone, Erwin?"

"If he has, good," Nile commented, putting an arm around her. "Then he can stop hitting on my wife."

"I don't hit on her," protested Erwin with a laugh. "She hits on me."

"I would never!" Marie gasped in a scandalized manner, but she winked at both men. "That isn't to say I don't enjoy having the company of two men I adore."

Used to the friendly banter and mock rivalry between Erwin and Nile, the three friends walked through the festival together, and Erwin's heart was lifted.

* * *

Far away in the base he'd been put under trial at, Levi sat in the barracks he'd been assigned to and he read his message from Hanji. This would be the fourth time he'd gone over it since he received the email, and his mind raced as he calculated how much time he would have with Erwin, should he decide to accept the invitation. They were giving him a week, but he would lose two days out of that traveling internationally. Five days with Erwin Smith, without gunfire, shouts, bitterly cold conditions or prying eyes. Levi had initially planned to go to the islands off the coast of Maria and spend time in a lodge there, since it was so close. It wasn't a conflict-free area, though.

He also had his mother Kuchel to think about. She'd been reborn just like himself, though she'd never given any indication of having any dreams or memories of the previous life. That was a blessing, as far as Levi was concerned. In this life, Kuchel was a social worker for child welfare services. While it was sometimes a stressful profession for her, it was also rewarding when she succeeded in getting a child out of a bad situation and helping them have a better life.

It was selfish of Levi, but he didn't know if he was ready to face his mother so soon after discovering that those awful nightmares of her death he'd had since childhood weren't just dreams. He couldn't just neglect to stop by and see her, though. What sort of piece of shit son would do that?

He mulled over it, frowning with indecision. He wanted to see Erwin. He wanted to see his mother, though he also dreaded both. He knew that he wouldn't be able to resist finally acting on his feelings with Erwin Smith if he saw him again under peaceful circumstances. He'd admitted as much to himself, and he'd told Erwin they had to wait until the situation was more ideal before exploring things further.

Levi retrieved the book he'd been keeping, and he opened it up to the last page with Erwin's bio on it. He stared at the image of his commander, tracing it with his fingertips. Hadn't they both been selfless enough? Hadn't they both sacrificed their own needs for others? He had every fucking right to be with him now. He also had an obligation to his mother, whom he loved very much.

One week's leave didn't seem like enough time, but if there was one thing Levi had learned, it was how to make every moment count.

* * *

Erwin checked his email and text messages every day. Hanji had given him Levi's contact info, but he refrained from pestering the captain about his invitation, knowing that he had to let Levi make this choice on his own. Near the end of day three since Hanji contacted him, Erwin finally found a message in his inbox that had his heart pounding fast. He set aside the ginger ale he'd been drinking to settle his stomach after a dinner of greasy takeout, and he opened up the email from "L. Ackerman". While it obviously wasn't in Levi's handwriting, the message was certainly written in Levi's "voice".

_"Hey blondie,_

_How's it going? Shitty-glasses got your invitation to me, and she's been nagging me to take you up on it. Not sure I'm such a good house guest. You know I'm OCD, right? Might want to hire a good cleaning person to come before I get there, if you're serious about me staying with you for a few days. Otherwise I'll be bitching about every spec of dust or streak I see."_

Erwin covered his lips with two fingers, chuckling about that. He could already picture Levi decked out in that cute cleaning ensemble he always wore in the previous life when he went on a housekeeping spree. He read on, smiling.

_"Anyway, if you're serious about this, I've attached my itinerary to this message. I can only stay for three days, though. I'd stay longer if I could, but I've got to stop by my Mom's and see her, too. That'll give me three days with you and two with her. Respond when you can, so I can lock everything in. I've got something for you, too._

_-Levi"_

Erwin had already been expecting to hear that Levi had some family he would want to see, but it was a surprise to learn the captain was willing to spend one more day with him than with his mother. He almost felt guilty about that, but after being deprived of the one he loved for so long, selfishness came easier for him. Erwin immediately and eagerly typed out a reply message, his fingers moving as a blur over the keyboard.

_"Levi,_

_Things are going well. My book is flowing almost faster than I can get the words out. That was a brilliant suggestion you gave to me before we parted ways. Of course I'm serious about having you as my guest! I don't mind hiring someone to give my house a thorough clean before you get here, either. I would prefer you be as comfortable here as possible, during your stay. Don't worry about the time frame; I understand. Family is important. I'm just happy to get the opportunity to spend a bit of time with you again, while you have it to spare._

_I'm curious as to what it is you have for me, but I'm sure that I'll enjoy the surprise, whatever it may be. I'll be at your gate when your flight arrives on Monday. Please let me know if anything changes in the itinerary between now and then._

_Yours always,_

_Erwin"_

Erwin paused briefly before hitting the "send" button. He wondered if he should revise the end part. Perhaps it was too sappy and romantic. He shrugged. When it came to Levi, that was simply how he tended to be. He'd even managed to make a proposal to put Levi in charge of his own squad sound like he was asking for his hand in marriage, once upon a time. He might get an eye-roll out of "yours always", but then he could picture a tiny smirk following it up, perhaps even one of those rare, sweet smiles the captain hardly ever gave.

Erwin clicked on "send", and he waited while having another sip of his drink. After about five minutes, a new reply made it into his inbox, and he opened it up immediately.

_"Christ, did you have that reply pre-written, or what? U type faster than Hanji babbles._

_-Levi"_

Erwin laughed aloud.

* * *

The weekend came and went, and Levi arrived on time in the Mitras International Airport on Monday afternoon. He was dressed in his military clothing, because he had no civilian clothing with him. He'd lost what common attire he'd brought with him on deployment during a firefight that cost his squad one of their supply trucks. He could have taken a moment to shop around during his layoff between flights, but airport prices were pretty steep, and he didn't want to risk missing his next flight to Mitras. People thanked him for his service when they saw him in uniform, to which he nodded in acknowledgement. He took off his cap once he stepped out the gate, stuffing it into one of his cargo pants pockets so that it wasn't obstructing his features. He combed his fingers through his hair to loosen it, and he looked around for a familiar, tall blond.

There he was, waiting on the other side of the security checkpoint. Erwin stood handsome and sophisticated looking, wearing cream colored trousers, a brown belt and a white, button-up collared short-sleeved shirt. Levi went still and just stared at him for a moment. The guy looked like he should be stepping out of some men's fashion magazine, and here Levi was with jetlag, mussed hair and combat attire.

Erwin spotted him, and the warm smile that lit up his face and those impossibly blue eyes seemed to permeate every cell in Levi's body. The writer started forward impulsively, but security stopped him with a polite reminder not to try and pass the checkpoint.

"Idiot," whispered Levi under his breath, but he did so with fondness. He started moving again, trying not to stare at Erwin as he passed through the line and made it through the checkpoint. He stopped before Erwin, and the two of them just stood and stared at one another for a while.

"Welcome home," Erwin finally said, his voice deep, soft and sincere.

It was a simple, innocent greeting probably being spoken to dozens of other people greeting their friends and loved ones after their flight, but it hit Levi so profoundly that his throat nearly closed up. Home. He was home. Maybe not in his town or his apartment, but he was on his home soil again. Not only that, he was with Erwin...Erwin, who had taken him out of darkness, given him a new purpose in life, died for the vision he'd convinced Levi to believe in.

And now Erwin was here again, in his life, and "Home" took on a whole new meaning for Levi.

"Levi?" Erwin's gaze softened on him when he noticed the stricken look on the captain's face.

Unable to speak, yet somehow retaining dry eyes, Levi caught the taller man up in an embrace and buried his face against his chest. Erwin's arms went around him in return, and the blond rested his cheek on the crown of Levi's head. A few people surely must have taken notice of the two men caught up in a tight hug, but they only gave them curious looks or little smiles. Most of them probably thought Levi and Erwin were old combat buddies reunited after seeing far too much together. That was fine by Levi, and it wasn't exactly wrong.

"Come on," Erwin said gently after a moment, when Levi finally pulled away, embarrassed that he'd acted so emotionally. "Let's go down to luggage claim and get your things."

Levi nodded mutely, grateful that the other man wasn't calling attention to his behavior. Reminding himself that he'd hugged Hanji before and there was nothing wrong with doing the same with Erwin, Levi walked with the taller man to the escalator down to the first level of the airport.

* * *

Truth be told, when Levi embraced him like that, so passionately and without any warning, Erwin had suffered the same lump in his throat as the captain. To have him so readily hug him like that just moments after seeing him again spoke more to Erwin than words could, and it boosted his confidence. Levi collected his green army duffle bag as soon as it showed up, and he slipped it on over his shoulders to carry on his back before Erwin could offer to carry it for him. They exited the airport, and Erwin led the captain to the lot where his white two-door convertible was parked at. Levi eyed the car quietly as Erwin unlocked the doors. It wasn't one of the tiny, modern sporty models, but an older one with round headlights and a back seat. It was a hard top model, and it was currently covered.

"It suits you," remarked Levi after giving the classic model a look-over. "Did you restore it yourself?"

"With my mother's help, yes." Erwin walked around to the passenger side where Levi stood, and he touched the straps on the smaller man's bag. "May I help you with this?"

Levi considered him for a moment, and Erwin could swear he was blushing. The captain nodded, and Erwin helped ease the bag off of his shoulders. He then put it into the back seat before going back around to the driver's side. He'd come close to holding the door open for Levi and then closing it for him, but he didn't want to overdo it with the chivalry. Levi wasn't the sort of guy that would appreciate too much of that kind of treatment. The trick was to pick the right moments.

Once they were both buckled in, Erwin turned the ignition and the engine purred to life. "So Levi," said Erwin conversationally, turning in his seat to look behind him as he backed out of his space, "we never got much of a chance to discuss much of our present personal lives, aside from that brief talk about...er...preferences."

Levi smirked. "Yeah, you're right. Do you want to start, or should I?"

"I'll start. What sort of car do you have at home?"

"I don't have a car. I have a jeep."

Erwin nodded, finding that a logical choice for the man. Funny how someone as conscious about hygiene would choose a rugged vehicle, but for Levi, it seemed to fit. "I'll bet you keep it immaculate."

"Practically rub it with a diaper when I'm home," agreed Levi. "Mom's been keeping it at her place since I got deployed. She drives it now and then to keep it running good, and I send her money every month to pay for gas, maintenance and having it detailed every couple of weeks."

Again, the blond nodded. In his past life, Levi had taken extra special care of his horse. It was no surprise that he would do the same for his car in this life. Erwin pulled out onto the road and headed for the interstate. "Where exactly do you live? You never told me."

"Ehrmich," answered Levi, "on the north side of town, just a few blocks from my mother."

Erwin blinked. "That's only a three hour drive east from here."

Levi shrugged. "Yeah, I guess so. Ever been there before?"

"I've passed through on occasion. It seems like a nice little town."

"It's okay, I guess. It gets kind of filthy during the spring festival, though. People pissing and puking in the street, drunk off their asses and probably stoned, too."

Erwin chuckled at that. "Sounds like downtown Mitras. Fortunately, I live at the edge of the urban area...almost in the suburbs. I think you'll like my neighborhood. The residents aren't particularly rowdy or troublesome or messy. The only exception is during football season and the holidays. I get the odd 'noisy neighbor' from time to time, but most of the parties don't go past midnight. I can only think of one time I've ever had to approach a neighbor and ask them to keep the noise down."

"Yeah?" Levi looked at him, narrowing his eyes against the sun shining through the window. "Did they give you any shit for it?"

"They started to," admitted Erwin. He kept his eyes on the road as he added: "but then they must have seen something in my eyes that changed their mind, and their defiance sputtered out like a lit match dipped in water."

Erwin heard a soft sound from Levi that he recognized as one of the captain's subtle, not-quite laughs. He glanced at him sidelong to see Levi smirking at him, and there was a dark sort of amusement dancing in the captain's pale gaze.

"You gave 'em the 'Commander Stare'."

Erwin smirked in return. "You think so?"

Levi nodded. "Without a doubt. I've seen plenty of greenhorn's come close to shitting themselves when those gorgeous eyes of yours turn to chips of ice."

Erwin's face heated. "You think my eyes are pretty?"

Levi sobered, his expression going completely sincere. The amusement in his eyes softened to something deep, warm and passionate. "Not pretty. Gorgeous. Pretty's not a strong enough word."

The compliment made Erwin feel giddy, like he was a teenaged boy again that just found out his crush liked him back. He felt like his face might soon catch fire, and he cleared his throat and put his attention back on the road. He took the ramp onto the interstate, and he tried to maintain his cool. "Thank you. Honestly though, I think if you had been there to give them your 'Captain's Glare', they might have run away screaming."

It didn't come out the way Erwin intended it too, and he cussed softly under his breath as Levi stared at him. "I mean, you have an intimidating glare. I recall many a recruit pissing themselves when you turned it on them."

"Heh. I think that's carried over into this life," stated Levi, apparently un-offended.

Erwin looked at him again once they got onto the interstate and merged into the traffic. "I think your eyes are beautiful too, Levi. They remind me of molten silver, whether they're flashing with anger or hooded with intrigue."

Now Levi's cheeks turned pink, and he looked away out the passenger window. "Sap."

Erwin laughed at that, his tension fading in response to the blunt remark. "Never change, Levi."

* * *

They didn't go straight to Erwin's place. Instead, the blond drove them to a spa, and when Levi regarded him questioningly, he simply smiled at him and nodded at the building.

"My treat, Levi. I think you've more than earned a good massage and some relaxation."

Unsure of what to say or how to react, Levi looked at the building. He'd never been to a place like this before. He would have thought it seemed girly, but Erwin was about the furthest thing from "girly" he could think of, and the thought of sinking into a bubbling hot tub was more than a little appealing to him.

"All right; if you say so. I'll try it out."

"Excellent," murmured the writer, and he cut the engine and got out.

Levi followed suit, and they went inside to sign in. Evidently, Erwin had already booked the appointment. The lady at the desk directed them to a massage room down the hallway almost immediately. She asked them to shed their clothes and don one of the freshly washed, complimentary bath robes. Levi and Erwin went into separate changing booths, and the captain was very much aware that his love interest was getting naked just a few feet away from him. Telling himself not to make a big deal of it, Levi finished changing into his robe and he joined Erwin a short while later.

Before long, two masseuses came in, and Levi got treated to his first pro massage ever. It was more than a little nice. The guy's touch was clinical and thorough, his fingers strong and sure as he worked the tension out of all of Levi's muscles. In fact, when it was finished, Levi didn't want to move right away. He forced himself to do so when Erwin suggested they hit the sauna next. Levi got up reluctantly, and before long he was in nothing but a towel, enjoying the steam with his companion. He tried not to stare at Erwin as the bigger man sat down on the bench and leaned back with a contented sigh. It was difficult though, because Erwin was beautiful beyond a doubt. This was the most Levi had seen of him since he'd helped him bathe in the previous life.

"So do you do this often?" asked Levi, trying to distract himself from the other man's near nudity. He watched a drop of moisture roll down Erwin's broad chest, sparkling in the light smatter of golden chest hair. He swallowed, feeling saliva building in his mouth.

Erwin's turquoise eyes opened and fixated on him. He nodded. "Guilty, as charged. I treat myself to a spa day each month as a reward for getting things published on time." His gaze roved over Levi, openly appreciative. "Of course, this will be the first time I've had such charming company."

Levi flushed. He'd been doing that a lot, lately. Erwin had a golden tongue to go along with his Prince Charming good looks. "You must get laid a lot," he mumbled.

Erwin smiled at him, his eyes lighting up with amusement. "What makes you think that, Levi?"

Levi shrugged, awkward and uncomfortable with the overpowering desire to straddle the blond's lap and kiss the shit out of him. "You've got a penchant for romantic talk. You could probably seduce the leg off a dead horse."

"That would be a disturbing sight," quipped Erwin with a chuckle. He sobered, and he reached out to caress Levi's jaw. "But I'm flattered. You're the only one I aim to seduce, Captain."

By now, Levi's face was a charming shade of pink. He gave up on trying to control his heightened blush factor, and he spoke frankly, true to character. "Well good news: it's fucking working. Tonight your ass is mine, Smith."

"Is it?" Erwin's suave mannerisms faded a bit with surprise and uncertainty. "Do you mean that literally?"

Reminded of the brief conversation they'd had before about preferences, Levi lowered his gaze. "Unless you're not willing. I know it's not the role you usually prefer, and I don't want to make you feel rushed into it."

The meaning behind his words weren't lost on Erwin. The blond regarded Levi with calm sincerity. He gazed into his eyes, and he slid his hand down to grasp Levi's nearest hand in his. "I'm more than willing, Levi. I've been wanting to be with you since the moment I saw you again and began remembering moments of our previous life. If you prefer to be on top for our first time together, then that's what we'll do. I'm sure it will be an amazing experience, regardless of which roles we take."

It was all the encouragement Levi needed to boost his confidence. He'd had worse reactions from previous romantic interests when he informed them that he wanted to top the first time they did it. He'd come to expect argument or rejection, because most men assumed by his size and looks that he was automatically submissive. Levi was by no means a passive lover, whether he was getting dick or giving it himself.

"Some people say I'm too pushy," he admitted softly.

Erwin just smiled at him again, and he brought Levi's hand to his lips, turned it over and kissed the palm. "I would question it if you weren't direct with your desires, Levi. Be as pushy as you like."

A little thrill went through the captain. Though Erwin was probably the only man he'd ever taken orders from so faithfully and unquestioningly, the man was willing to bend for him in ways that nobody else ever had. Levi wondered how many times Erwin had bottomed in the past, and he got stricken by a wave of possessive jealousy at the thought of some other man putting it to him.

"Oi, just so you know," Levi said, squaring his shoulders, "if we do this, you're stuck with me. I mean it, Erwin, so stop grinning like that. People can look, but they can't touch. You're mine. Are we clear on that?"

"Crystal," agreed Erwin softly, "and have no doubt; I won't so much as look at another person, knowing I have you."

Levi's tension faded, and he felt like a dick for getting so intense about it. "I'm not usually this possessive, you know."

"Have I complained?" The dazzling smile returned to Erwin's handsome face, and he squeezed Levi's hand. "Knowing I can provoke such passion in you is a thrill to me."

"Fuck, there you go again," complained Levi. He was starting to blush yet again. "You've got some kind of poetic superpower."

"And what would my superhero name be?" questioned Erwin with a wink.

"I dunno...'Commander Cheese' or something."

Erwin threw his head back and laughed deeply.

* * *

He was stalling, and he knew it. Erwin took Levi to one of his favorite restaurants after they finished at the spa. He could have easily just brought him straight home and either cooked dinner for him or ordered something for delivery, but Erwin was admittedly nervous. Tonight was going to be the night. They were finally going to be together. He'd waited for so long for this encounter to happen, and now he was scared out of his mind that he would somehow disappoint Levi. He wasn't very experienced with taking the bottom role. He wasn't worried that Levi might hurt him, but he was very concerned that he wouldn't fulfill his role to satisfaction and spoil the whole encounter.

Being an overly imaginative fool, Erwin got himself more worked up over it by the moment. He ordered a bottle of red wine to go with their meal, rather than a couple of glasses. He realized he was imbibing a bit too much when his date finally said something to him.

"Christ, you're barely even wetting your lips on it, Erwin. If you wanted to go out and do shots, you should have just told me."

Humbled by the realization that he'd just downed a full glass and poured himself another, Erwin regarded Levi with sheepish contrition. "I _am_ tossing it back rather quickly. Thank you for keeping me in check."

Levi tilted his head, and he looked vaguely wolfish in his curiosity. The pale gray eyes narrowed, and he leaned forward in his seat to speak to Erwin in a low voice. "What's going on with you?" murmured the captain. He brushed his booted foot against Erwin's beneath the table. "You nervous?"

Erwin started to blow it off and make up an excuse, but he could see by the sincere expression on his companion's face that Levi wouldn't accept any fabrication. He had to be honest with this man, because though they hadn't known each other for long in this life, they had plenty of experience with one another in the previous one. Levi knew him too well for Erwin to get away with any lies.

"Yes," he confessed. He reached across the table, and he laid his big hand over Levi's smaller one. "I'm nervous."

Levi's intense look softened. "I see. Hey Erwin, if it's going too fast for you, we can—"

"No," interrupted Erwin with a sharp shake of his head. "Levi, no. I want this...more than anything. I'm just worried you might not be satisfied, because...well...I'm not used to the sort of position I'm going to be in."

Levi relaxed, and a flash of amusement lit his silvery gaze. "Performance anxiety? Shit, I'm the one that should be worrying about that."

It was a reasonable observation to make. Technically, all Erwin would have to do was respond to his companion's actions. Still, he feared he might not do it well enough. He brushed his thumb over Levi's knuckle, and he sighed. "I'm over-thinking this, aren't I?"

"A little, yeah," agreed Levi with a smirk. His expression smoothed out, and he spoke in a lower tone of voice. "Just let it come naturally, big guy. I don't want any of it to feel staged. You don't need to put on an act for me and if I do something you don't like, I expect you to speak up. I want this to be good for both of us."

Erwin nodded, and he felt a little better now that he'd gotten his concerns off his chest. The waiter came back with their appetizers then, and Erwin couldn't help but be amused at his own choice. A dozen raw oysters on the half-shell. Could he have been more blatant?

"What's so funny?" Levi demanded, making use of his small fork to loosen one of the oysters. He squeezed some juice over it from one of the lemon wedges and splashed a little hot sauce on the oyster he'd selected.

Erwin took one for himself, and he copied Levi's actions. "You know what they say about oysters, yes?"

He stared as the smaller man tilted his head back to drop the oyster into his mouth, watching Levi's pale throat work as he swallowed. Levi lowered his head again, looking into Erwin's eyes. He smirked ever so slightly. "Dick enhancement?"

Erwin had to give credit where it was due: Levi managed to be sensual without apparently even trying to. He nodded, bringing his own oyster to his lips. "To put it bluntly, yes. I don't think either of us are going to need it, though."

In fact, he was starting to get hard in his pants just thinking of how this night would end.

"Still doesn't hurt," remarked Levi. He prepared another oyster for consumption. "Besides, I like these things. Took me ages to finally try one because I thought they looked disgusting, but once I did, I was sold. Damn, I can't remember the last time I had some of these."

"Then I'm happy to have treated you." Erwin smiled. It made him feel good to know he was providing a few luxuries to a man that had been living under harsh circumstances for some time, now. He almost wished Hanji were there with them, but the selfish part of Erwin just wanted Levi all to himself for the three days he would have him. "By the way, what ever happened with the investigation concerning Jinae and the confusion of orders? Or can you speak about that?"

Levi shrugged. "I can talk to you about it, but don't publish it, all right? It's semi-classified info."

"I understand."

Levi finished off another oyster and had a sip of wine before going on. "Turns out the lady that put out the distress call was forced to do it. She got approached by a couple of the insurgents the day before contact, and they threatened her family...said they'd kill 'em all if she didn't cooperate and help lure us in. It wasn't her fault. The whole thing was a setup, but at least we know it wasn't coming from _our_ end."

Erwin sobered with the news, and he took a thoughtful sip of his wine. "That's terrible, Levi. I'm so sorry. So many lives were lost because of that situation."

Levi shrugged again. "Nothing to be done about it, now. We caught the bastards responsible for it, along with a few other insurgents. Now they're prisoners of war and they'll be tried for their crimes...probably executed by a firing squad, if there's any justice in the world."

"They've earned it," stated Erwin grimly. He could see the haunted look in Levi's eyes, even though the man tried to be nonchalant about it. He reached for Levi's hand to give it another squeeze. "What happens when your vacation is over? How much longer is your service tour?"

"A year," answered Levi. "Me and Hanji are both supposed to finish our tour at the same time, but the military could override that if they decide we're needed for longer."

A full year. That news was practically heart-breaking to Erwin. Once Levi left, he would be waiting a long time to see him again, and that was presuming the captain survived long enough to be given leave.

"Oi, don't look so sad," cautioned Levi. "I've made it for this long, haven't I? You've just got to be willing to wait for me and have some faith I'll be back."

Erwin forced his thoughts out of the dark places they were drifting too, and he gave the smaller man a little smile. Levi had outlived him in the previous life, after all. He was skilled, resourceful and intelligent. "Yes, I have faith."

* * *

When they finished eating and got back to the car, Levi recalled the gift he'd brought for Erwin. "Hold on," he said as the blond opened the driver's side door. "I want to give you something while I'm thinking about it."

Erwin paused, watching as Levi bent over to rummage through his bag in the back seat. After a moment of searching, the captain found the box he was looking for. He circled around to his companion on the other side of the car, and he handed the oblong container to him. "Go ahead. Open it."

Erwin did as directed, looking curiously into the box as he pulled the lid off. Levi contained a smirk as the blond lifted out the bolo tie he'd picked up for him. Levi saw it in a store window in Shiganshina and he knew he had to get it for him. It closely resembled the commander's bolo tie from the past.

"Levi," Erwin breathed, staring at it. "This is almost identical to—"

"Your old one, yeah," finished Levi for him, satisfied that he'd wowed the blond. "I knew it was for you the minute I saw it. Want to try it on?"

Erwin nodded, and he handed the piece to Levi. "Please do the honors."

Levi swallowed as the taller man bent over so that he could slip the bolo tie over his head. Almost reverently, the captain put it on him, and he tightened it appropriately as Erwin straightened back up.

"Perfect," whispered Levi. Looking at Erwin now, a swift pain struck him. The memory of removing the commander's bolo tie to present it to Hanji upon Erwin's death struck him like a fist in the gut. Levi feared he might start crying, and he turned away to compose himself. "It looks great."

Erwin was silent for several moments, and then he embraced Levi from behind. "Thank you," he said into the smaller man's ear. "This was a very thoughtful gift. You know, I have something for you as well."

Levi felt the tightness in his throat easing up, and he turned around to face Erwin again. "You do?"

"Yes. I'd forgotten until now, because I was so excited to see you again." Erwin smiled at him. "It's sort of ironic, too. Check the glove box when you get in the car."

Now maddeningly curious, Levi got into the passenger seat, and he waited for Erwin to get in beside him before opening up the glove box. Inside, he found a shopping bag from an expensive clothing store. He shot a wondering look toward his companion as he opened it up.

"You fucking kidding me?" Levi pulled out the white cravat within the bag. It was of fine material with a high thread count.

"Amusing, isn't it?" Erwin chuckled. "I saw it the other day, and I immediately thought of you."

"Amusing" wasn't the word Levi would have chosen to describe how this made him feel. "Amazing" would have been more apt. He looked at Erwin with his head tilted to one side, and he carefully folded up the accessory.

"I'd put it on right now, but it doesn't go with combat fatigues. Plus, I want to be wearing something clean and fresh. Don't want to dirty it." Recalling that he had no civilian clothes to speak of, the captain cursed quietly. "Damn, I don't have anything else to wear, though."

"That's easily fixed," insisted Erwin without hesitation. "We can stop somewhere on the way to my place and buy some clothes for you. You've packed light, so you should have plenty of room for a couple of outfits."

Levi hesitated. "I'd considered buying some clothes, but I don't want to end up losing them like I did before. Maybe I could leave them with Mom when I have to catch my flight back."

"Or," suggested Erwin softly, "you could leave them with me. That way when your tour is finished, you'll already have clothes you can change into when you have time to visit me again."

Levi considered the offer. Under any other circumstance, he would say that was moving too fast. However, this was Erwin. He couldn't see himself _not_ coming to stay with the man again when his service was up. In fact, the thought of eventually moving in with him was more than a little appealing. He met his companion's eyes, and he nodded.

"I think we could do that."

"Good." Erwin started the car, and he seemed to release a breath he'd been holding. "I was concerned you wouldn't like the idea."

Levi huffed softly. Here he'd been worried he was rushing things with Erwin, and the man was already offering him closet space. He'd never had anything fall so easily into place in a relationship before, and he kept waiting to feel anxious over how fast it was going. It didn't feel rushed, though. It just felt like he and Erwin were picking up where they left off, finally going for something they'd denied themselves in the past.

"I fucking love you," admitted Levi softly.

Erwin's head jerked in his direction, his eyes widening slightly. "Could you...say that again?"

Embarrassed, Levi almost refused. He could see by the look in Erwin's eyes that the man was dead serious, though. He needed to hear it again, and Levi needed to say it again.

"I love you, Erwin Smith."

Erwin reached across the distance to squeeze the smaller man's knee. "I love you too, Levi."

* * *

-To be continued

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> End of chapter recap:
> 
> Levi: "Damn, I want to see Erwin, but I want to see my mom too."
> 
> Erwin: "I'll take every second you can spare for me, Levi."
> 
> Levi: "I look like shit and he's fucking dashing. Holy hell, how did I resist that?"
> 
> Erwin: "Oh my fucking god, he's beautiful."
> 
> Levi: "Oysters, huh? Are you trying to tell me something?"
> 
> Erwin: (#^.^#) "...no..." (why did I have to be so blatant?)
> 
> Levi: "Here. You don't look right without a bolo tie."
> 
> Erwin: "How interesting...you don't look right without a cravat!"
> 
> Levi: "You know I'm going to tear your ass up, right? Oh, by the way: I fucking love you."
> 
> Me: "Holy shit, just marry each other, already!"


	11. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bottom!Erwin warning

Levi wasted no time in getting the ball rolling, once they made it to Erwin's house. The writer barely had time to try and initiate anything before Levi dragged him into the bedroom and started kissing him hungrily. Erwin put his arms around him, his breath quickening with excitement as their tongues fenced. After several moments of wet, desperate kisses, the couple separated. Levi gazed up at Erwin with a promise in his steely eyes, and he started to undress.

Erwin couldn't rid himself of the need to gulp. It was absolutely ridiculous. Here Levi stood before him, slowly unbuttoning his shirt, and all that Erwin could think of was diving in to lick his partially bared chest. He couldn't get his mind off the time in the sauna they'd shared together earlier in the day. He could still see the captain's nude physique quite clearly in his mind. Lithe, toned musculature, tight little ass, perfectly curved back, strong, narrow shoulders...Erwin was actually quite proud of himself for not trying to jump Levi right then and there.

"Levi," he intoned, letting his hungry gaze caress his companion's form. He watched the last three buttons flick open, and he stared at the smaller man's abdominal ripples once revealed to him. Levi had a very, very cute little naval. Finely traced with hair, it was an "outie", a perfect little nub just begging for someone's lips to close around it and give it a gentle, loving suck. His nipples though...God, those nipples. When Levi parted the material of his shirt to reveal them, Erwin damned near lost his composure. Small and flat on the rock-hard pecs, the pink buds were entirely too lickable. His chest was smooth of hair, the skin smooth and pale in the lamp light.

"How did I ever deprive myself of this?" murmured Erwin.

Levi propped a booted foot up on the chair he stood by, near the corner of the bedroom. His smoky, appreciative gaze practically ravished Erwin as he began to deftly unlace the boots.

"I've been asking myself the same damned thing. What in the fuck were we thinking, Erwin?"

The larger man shook his head. His hands worked almost frantically as he loosened his new bolo and began to undress. "I don't know. How much more good could we have done for humanity if we had just given in and found relief in each other?"

Levi smirked. He unbuckled his belt, sliding the leather strap through his fingers erotically. His eyes never left Erwin's. "We were being too fucking chivalrous. Bet we might have done things a little smoother if we weren't constantly suffering sexual frustration for each other."

Erwin was forced to agree. As the laces in Levi's boots started to loosen, he impulsively stopped him. "Wait. Levi, please leave those on."

Levi tilted his head at him. "Kind of hard to take my pants off, if I've got these boots on."

Erwin swallowed. "Yes, I know. Considering that you're topping tonight, however, I would like you to leave them on. You don't need to remove the pants entirely...much as I would love to see and kiss every inch of you."

Levi stopped his actions, and his eyes flashed with some emotion Erwin couldn't quite catch. The captain nodded slowly. "For you, I can do this."

Erwin couldn't restrain a smile. Levi...his Levi. Finally, they were going to be together. It didn't matter that it wasn't happening the first time the way he'd fantasized. It didn't matter that he didn't generally prefer to "bottom" when with another man. He was going to be with the man of his dreams...literally.

Erwin started to laugh at himself all the sudden.

Levi, obviously misunderstanding, narrowed his eyes at him. "Hey, if you're not taking this seriously—"

"No, Levi...no." Erwin closed the distance between them, and he cupped the smaller man's beloved little face in his palms. He brushed his fingers over Levi's parted lips, marveling at his features. Damn, he was just so cute. "I take it _very_ seriously. I was only laughing at myself, I promise. You've made me your slave, and I adore it."

Levi regarded him with wary gray eyes for a moment, and then he relaxed. His arms stole around Erwin's waist, and he then made a gesture that was so sweet, it had Erwin melting in his shoes. He rose on his tiptoes, kissed the tip of the blond's nose, and then followed up with a soft kiss to the lips.

"You're a huge dork," whispered Levi. His mouth smirked against Erwin's. "Don't ever change."

"I'll try not to," promised Erwin.

He slid his hands down over Levi's shoulders, and further still after that. He stroked his palms over Levi's back, feeling the firm muscles bunching and relaxing. He closed in for another kiss as Levi slipped his hands up underneath his crew t-shirt. He had to remind himself of the role he was going to be taking tonight, and that wasn't an easy thing for him. Erwin's instincts wanted him to claim Levi. It was a thing he'd been wanting for so long; he'd built the moment up in his mind, and his body didn't quite know what to do with itself now that they were about to finally be together under a different dynamic than expected.

"Hey, easy," protested Levi when the blond cupped his ass and started to lift him up against him. "I'm not a doll."

"Sorry," breathed Erwin. He relaxed his hold, but he didn't let go of the other man's bottom. Levi's ass was just too perfect.

"Lift up your arms," demanded Levi huskily. "I don't have the patience to unbutton your shirt."

It was so hard to take his hands off of the firm mounds they were cupping, but Erwin was bound and determined to show Levi that he was indeed versatile in the bedroom. He obeyed, determined to leave no doubt in Levi's mind that he was making the right decision in becoming his lover. As he lifted his arms for Levi to tug his shirt up and off, Erwin closed his eyes and begged himself for patience. When the garment was removed, he opened his eyes again and he looked down at his companion. Levi was staring at him, devouring him with those sleepy bedroom eyes of his. The captain ran his hands over Erwin's chest, his palms stroking over the pattern of golden hair on it. Levi had seen him shirtless before. Actually, they'd both seen quite a bit of each other in the sauna. Not to mention, Levi had helped him bathe one time in their past life, after Erwin lost his arm. Still, Levi had a look of quiet awe on his face, as if he was seeing so much of Erwin's flesh for the first time.

"Look at you," murmured Levi in approval. His touch became lighter...caressing. His fingers skimmed over Erwin's skin sensually, drawing goose bumps. "Fuck, you're hot. I don't know how I never tapped this before."

Erwin shivered, moved by those words more than he could express. His lust and need for this man was swiftly coming to a boil, and he embraced Levi as his patience started to snap. "I'm sorry," he intoned, pausing within an inch of the other man's lips as he lowered his head to Levi's. "I don't know how submissive you expect me to be, but this is torture."

"I don't want a lump in bed with me," assured Levi huskily, his breath coming faster, "and I'm not expecting you to show throat to me every time...Commander."

That did it for Erwin. He kissed Levi hungrily, prying the other man's lips open to plunge his tongue into his mouth. He thought he heard Levi make a curious sound that was almost a whimper, and Erwin wondered if this was still going to go down as they'd agreed.

* * *

Levi was having similar thoughts to Erwin's. This first encounter was basically a test. Sometimes the captain wished he weren't so insecure about sex. He wished he could just give in and go with his feelings, rather than always suffer this need to assert himself from the beginning. Men tended to get the impression that he was automatically going to be on bottom. Of course, it didn't help that he loved having a big cock inside of him, so he was always a bit at war with himself when he took a male partner to bed.

This was Erwin Smith, though. He shouldn't hesitate to go with his instincts, with this man. He shouldn't _need_ to prove anything to him. Erwin knew him better than anyone, including Hanji. He'd trusted the man with his life, back in the titan days. He still trusted him, so why was he bothering with this?

_Because I need it to feel secure._

That simple answer wiped away his doubt. Yeah, Erwin knew him, and the man was willing to give him his ass instead of demanding Levi's straight out the door. It admittedly gave the captain a thrill. He could instinctively tell that Erwin didn't usually bottom, simply by the way the man was ravishing his mouth and running his hands over his body. He was used to being in charge, but he was giving Levi the control, and the significance of that wasn't lost on Levi.

As his hands curved behind the bigger man's body to squeeze Erwin's ass, one of Levi's guilty pleasures reared its head. He ran with it, deciding it was better to test the waters now, rather than try to have an awkward conversation about it later.

* * *

Erwin jumped when the double-handed smack landed sharply on both his ass cheeks, firm enough to sting even through his pants and underwear. He broke the kiss and stared at Levi in astonishment.

"What was that?"

"I spanked your ass," stated Levi raggedly, cheeks flushed. He bit his lip, and the lust in his gaze softened with uncertainty. "You didn't like it..."

Erwin's brain was temporarily frozen, and it took him a moment to jar thought back into motion. "I didn't hate it. I just wasn't expecting it."

Levi took a deep breath, and he held Erwin's gaze as he did it again. Erwin jumped again, but he didn't pull away. He could see by the calculating look in his companion's eyes that Levi was testing him again. "So you enjoy spanking, I take it."

Levi shrugged, avoiding the blond's gaze. "Little bit, yeah. It's okay if you're not into it. I can respect that."

Erwin cupped Levi's chin, smiling in spite of himself. As if the man weren't already cute enough, without looking so contrite and shy. "Levi, there's precious little I'm not willing to try with you. There's nothing to be ashamed of."

Levi looked up at him searchingly. "I'm not saying I want to bend you over have you yell 'Daddy' at me. I just like to give a little smack now and then, and..." he trailed off as if he couldn't bring himself to complete the sentence.

"Tell me," urged Erwin. "It can't possibly be bad enough to frighten me away from you, Levi."

Levi took another deep breath, and he squeezed Erwin's bottom. "Okay, you asked for it. Actually, _I_ like to be spanked. Has to be the right person at the right time, though. It's not a mandatory kink I need every time I fuck; just once in a while I...shit...I don't even know what I'm saying. I've never even...nobody's ever..."

Erwin thought he understood where this was going, and he stroked Levi's soft, dark hair encouragingly. "You've never actually had it done to you the way you want it?"

Levi sighed, and he planted his face in Erwin's bare chest. "And here I was trying to avoid an awkward conversation about it. Yeah, I've never actually had that fantasy fulfilled. You nailed it. I've...never told anyone before."

It was the highest form of flattery to Erwin, finding out that Levi was sharing something so very personal with him...something that he'd never felt comfortable admitting to anyone. Erwin stared at him, and he slid Levi's open shirt off of the smaller man's shoulders.

"If you want to explore that with me, say the word when you're ready. I'll be happy to try it."

Levi's tension eased, and he let out a breath that Erwin didn't realize he'd been holding. "Not tonight, though."

Erwin smiled. "Not tonight," he agreed. "Tonight, my 'ass is yours', to quote you directly."

"Heh." Levi lowered his gaze, and that sweet, rare little smile manifested on his lips. "That's right. Your ass is mine tonight, Smith."

"So is my heart," blurted Erwin impulsively, enchanted.

Levi raised a brow. "Feeling poetic again, are we?"

Embarrassed that he'd let his passion again take over, the blond shrugged. "You know my flaws, Levi. Being 'cheesy', as you put it, happens to be one of them."

"Hmm, good point." Levi met his gaze again, and he pressed his hands against Erwin's bare chest, pushing him firmly yet gently backwards. "Get on the bed, Commander Cheese."

* * *

Levi knew what he was doing, and God help him, he'd been waiting for this for two fucking lifetimes. Why then were his hands shaking as he finished undressing his commander? Why was he so nervous? It almost felt disrespectful to be this bold and assertive with a man he'd sworn to follow into Hell itself.

All it took to reassure him, though, was a trusting look from the blond. Lying there nude, golden and tanned beneath Levi's straddling form, Erwin looked utterly magnificent...and he was submitting without question to Levi's desires. The captain took a slow breath, and he finally allowed himself to familiarize himself with this tall form in ways that he'd always hesitated to do so before. He started slow, though his body was aching and hot with impatient lust. Levi reined in his desire, and he straddled Erwin's reclined form, gazing down at him.

"Where to start?" he murmured teasingly. He caressed the blond's chiseled features, and then he allowed his hands to glide lower, brushing his fingertips over the fine dusting of golden hair on Erwin's chest. The bigger man gasped softly as Levi pinched his nipples, just hard enough to make them pebble.

"Shh," warned Levi, his voice dripping sensuality. He fondled the hardened buds, and then he scooted down a bit so that he was on top of Erwin's thighs. This allowed him to have a full view of those magnificent jewels between his companion's legs. "Damn, and I thought you were impressive soft," he whispered.

He didn't take the opportunity to touch Erwin down there just yet. Instead, he admired the sight of the lifted swell of the man's cock, the pattern of crisp hair surrounding it, and the heavy weight of the sack beneath. He stroked Erwin's stomach with his left hand while still rubbing his nipples one at a time with the right. Levi met the blond's eyes as Erwin's breath caught again. He thought of how sensitive he himself was in the nipple area, and he realized Erwin wasn't quite as reactive to the touch, there. No matter. Levi intended to find every weak spot this man had by the end of the night.

He bent over to capture an earlobe between his teeth, tugging gently on it. That got a bigger reaction from Erwin. A low groan, a roll of the hips, and Levi knew he'd found his first target. He traced the shell of Erwin's ear with his tongue, and he slipped his left hand down further. Skimming a path along Erwin's pelvic lines, Levi paid careful attention to every response he was getting.

"Ticklish there, are you?" observed the captain when Erwin huffed a soft chuckle and squirmed. It was fucking endearing. He'd never even considered that Erwin Smith might be _ticklish_. Mercilessly, he kept gliding his fingertips over the area. "Be still."

"L-Levi, that's really no fair," complained Erwin, going pink in the face. To his credit, he was trying to comply with Levi's demand. His hips jerked tellingly despite his efforts, and he fisted the bed sheets.

"Did I promise to play fair?" Levi blew into the bigger man's ear, fighting back a grin.

Erwin took a shaken breath, and he shook his head. "You most certainly did not. I concur."

"Good boy," approved Levi. He shot a glance down at Erwin's package, noting the glisten of precum forming on the tip. Interesting. "You get off on this shit, don't you?"

"N-no," denied Erwin. He sputtered with laughter as Levi's calloused fingertips continued to dance over his pelvis and hips. "Fuck, you little sadist..."

Levi stopped what he was doing, sat up and gave Erwin a warning glare. "Careful with the word usage, Smith. You agreed to follow my lead tonight."

Erwin visibly swallowed, his stare ghosting over Levi's bare-chested, form. "So I did. Carry on."

Levi struggled against a smirk. He resumed petting Erwin's body in ways that he now knew had conflicting results. "That's better."

Erwin hissed, and his thick brows furrowed with the effort of trying to remain compliant. His eyes squeezed shut. "How long do you...intend to keep this up?"

Levi shrugged, now using both hands to tease the sensitized area of Erwin's pelvis. "Until you beg me. Look at how wet you're getting, Erwin. Your dick's dripping like a leaky faucet."

On that note, Levi cocked his head, again pausing. "Hey, that could be indicative of an STD, you know."

Erwin opened his eyes, and Levi couldn't really blame him for the exasperated look he shot up at him. "Really? We've already covered that, Levi."

"Just making an observation," stated the captain, amused. Of course he knew that Erwin was clean, and vice-versa. It was entertaining to see him get so indignant, though. "Since I know that's not the case, I might as well tell you it's getting me hot to see how worked up you are."

Erwin couldn't help but jerk a little as Levi resumed tickling him. His erection throbbed, and another drop of fluid rolled down the side of it. "I never knew this would work me up," he confessed.

Levi watched him struggle to maintain his breathing, and he spoke another soft observation. "It seems we both have our kinks, then. It's all right, Erwin. It's...kind of cute."

Erwin met his eyes again, and Levi flushed. The captain looked away. "I mean, I didn't expect a guy like you to even be ticklish at all. I dig it."

Erwin's expression softened, and he let go of the sheets to rub Levi's outer thighs. "It seems we're both teaching each other things about ourselves, Captain."

Levi impulsively rocked his hips, loving the contact. The move made Erwin's breath catch again, and the blue of his eyes seemed to intensify.

"You must be amazing at riding your partners," he suggested huskily.

Levi bent over, and he traced the blond's lips with the tip of his tongue. "Guess you'll find out later."

Enough games. Levi was incredibly horny, and he'd been itching to touch his companion's substantial endowments. He finally allowed himself the privilege, sliding his hands inwards. He gripped the base of Erwin's shaft with one hand, and he weighed his balls with the other. "Fuck, are you ever hung."

Levi didn't give the other man a chance to respond to his lewd observation. He shimmied further down, nudged Erwin's thighs apart and helped himself to a lick. The blond groaned softly as Levi's tongue circled the knob of his sex, flicking under the ridge of it. He tempered himself, and he remained relatively still, spreading his legs further to give the captain full access. Levi kissed his way up and down the length, rewarding Erwin for his cooperation. He worked his palm, rolling Erwin's balls in it as he treated himself to the taste of his cock.

Salty, viscous and all too addictive, Erwin's precum coated Levi's tongue as he licked it off. He put his lips around the girth of it, glanced up the length of his companion's body, and then took it slowly into his mouth. Erwin's abdomen flexed with tension, the muscles clenching up in reaction to the sensation. Subtly, Levi released Erwin's balls and he reached into his pants pocket for the packs of sterile lube he'd picked up on the way to the writer's place. By now, they should be nice and warm. Having cold lube applied out of the blue was one of the worst experiences to have in a sexual encounter, and he wasn't about to do that to Erwin. He started bobbing his head, still gripping the base of Erwin's cock as he sucked him off. He worked the tab off of one of the lube packs as he did this, and he squeezed the packet to get the gel out of it.

"Mmm," hummed Levi when Erwin groaned again. It was so tempting to finish him off this way, but he really wanted Erwin's first orgasm with him to happen while he was inside of him. He pulled back, letting Erwin's arousal slip out of his mouth to slap wetly against the blond's lower abdomen. "Roll over, sexy."

Breathing heavily, Erwin did as he commanded. As soon as the blond was on his stomach with his muscular ass presented to Levi, the smaller man fell back on impulse. Levi's right hand shot out before he could even try to stop it, slapping one perfect, pale cheek. He liked how the tan lines outlined Erwin's ass.

"Ah! Could you please consider warning me, at least?" Erwin had propped himself up on his elbows, and now he was glaring at Levi.

Aware that he might be pushing it a bit too far, Levi tried to make up for his lapse. The captain scooched down on the bed, one knee pressing between Erwin's long legs, and he plopped down on the blond's body. He kissed Erwin's ass, gazing up at him as his lips gently pressed against the fresh handprint he'd left on the other man's right butt cheek.

"Okay, I'm warning you," breathed Levi, almost smirking at the way Erwin's blue glare softened and went blank. "I'm probably gonna smack this fine ass a couple of times while I'm fucking you. Can't help it. I'll try to let you know when it's coming, okay?"

Erwin relaxed in response to the promise. He nodded. "I can agree to those terms."

Levi resisted the temptation to roll his eyes. Erwin almost sounded like he was making some sort of business arrangement, and Levi had to remind himself that this man had already told him he wasn't generally accustomed to taking the "bottom" role in the bedroom. Levi was also a firm believer in taking care of his partners' needs...particularly if they were taking it up the ass for him. On that note, he decided spanking wasn't the only thing he should prepare Erwin for.

"I'm about to start fingering you," he warned, rubbing the slippery, clear substance he'd just procured over his fingers to spread it evenly. He generally didn't give warnings for things that his bed partners already expected, but he felt the need to avoid taking Erwin by surprise too much. He spread the blond's cheeks with the fingers of one hand, and he watched him as he started to stroke the puckered flesh of his hole. Erwin bowed his head, and to Levi's surprise, he stuck his ass up invitingly. Taking that to mean he was ready for more, the captain gently pushed one finger into him up to the first knuckle.

Erwin was tight. Fuck, he was so tight. It made Levi's crotch throb. He wondered when the man had last done this with anyone, and then he got immediately jealous again at the thought of another man having him that way. No, he didn't need to think that way. Tonight Erwin was his, and hopefully he would be again many times after this. Levi pressed deeper, and he saw a shudder ripple through the blond's powerful frame.

"Is it okay?" whispered Levi.

Erwin nodded. "More."

Levi complied, filling his lover to the final knuckle. He curled his finger inside of him, feeling around for that special little lump. Once he found it, he stroked against it firmly. Erwin's back arched, a gasp tearing from his lips. Levi realized then that the blond wasn't used to this kind of stimulation. He inserted a second finger into him, and he rubbed the spot in a circular motion.

"Like that, do you?" murmured Levi with a smug little smirk as Erwin cursed under his breath and canted his hips off the mattress.

He kept it up, and he slipped his free hand beneath Erwin's pelvis to grip his arousal. He stroked it slowly as he pumped and curled his fingers inside the blond, staring at the flush that crept up Erwin's neck. The blond turned his head and peered at Levi over his shoulder, parting his lips to gasp his name.

"Just wait 'till my cock is buried inside of you," promised Levi, biting his lower lip to hold back a groan of need. "Damn, you should see yourself right now. You look fucking sinful."

"Curious word usage," grunted Erwin. He gave another low groan as Levi's fingers thrust back in. The blond squirmed, though Levi could tell that he was trying not to. "God, that feels so...hah...L-Levi..."

The smaller man had inserted a third finger, stretching Erwin further. Levi said nothing in response to Erwin's comments...mainly because he didn't think he could speak right now without growling. He shifted on top of the back of Erwin's thighs, trying to relieve the pressure in his crotch. His palm started to itch, and he released Erwin's cock.

"Here it comes again," warned Levi, and then he smacked the blond on the opposite cheek to the one he'd swatted earlier.

It wasn't much of a warning, but it was something. Erwin hissed, his hands clenching briefly into fists. Levi rubbed the spot soothingly, aware that he'd used a bit more vigor than intended. He scooted down again, and he closed in on Erwin's ass to kiss both of the cheeks. Feeling inspired, Levi then did something that he had never before done to a partner: he traced the crevice between Erwin's cheeks with his tongue. When the bigger man let loose a surprised groan, Levi swiped his tongue back upwards from the base of Erwin's sack. He traced the sensitive flesh sheathing his fingers, licking generously at it. Erwin reacted more than favorably to that. The blond pushed back against Levi, encouraging more of the attention.

"I...wouldn't have expected this of you," admitted Erwin breathlessly as Levi continued to rim him while he finger fucked him.

It was ironic to Levi that he'd just been thinking of how unusual it was for him to do something he would ordinarily think of as unsanitary, but he knew that Erwin had recently showered and gone to the bathroom. That was one of Levi's conditions to going bareback, and he trusted Erwin. He became bolder as he caused another jolt to go through the blond. Levi sucked on Erwin's balls, nudging the bigger man's thighs wider. That proved to be very rewarding, because Erwin cussed loudly and rasped Levi's name. So, he liked his balls played with. That was fine by Levi. He kissed and sucked them as he continued working his fingers inside of his lover, and upon sliding his free hand under Erwin's hips to squeeze his cock, he found it obnoxiously wet with precum.

"Lift up," ordered the captain, jaw clenched with his effort not to lose his shit and screw up.

Erwin did as he asked, sticking his ass up into the air and bending his knees a little. Levi appreciated that he wasn't getting completely to his hands and knees, because their height difference would have probably made it awkward to continue if Erwin's butt was too far elevated. Panting now, Levi shifted onto his knees. He pumped his fingers inside a couple more times while he reached for the lube again, and once he had himself slicked up enough to satisfy him, he threw an arm around Erwin's waist. Levi bent over him as far as he could, and this counted as one of those moments where he wished he were taller. He could only reach Erwin's shoulder blades to kiss. He dropped the lube aside carelessly, and he fisted his free hand over his erection to line it up.

Erwin's reaction to feeling the smaller man slide inside of him was a thing of beauty. He grabbed at the pillows, hands curling into fists, and he moaned throatily. Levi paused halfway in, lifting his head to watch his companion and gauge how he was taking it.

"You okay, big guy?"

"Y-yes," breathed Erwin after a moment of stillness, breaking into a sweat. "It's been a while."

"Same here," agreed Levi. He pushed in deeper, biting his lip. It felt so good; the sensation pooled in his pelvis and throbbed through his torso from there. Levi waited until he was in balls-deep, and then he withdrew. He squeezed Erwin around the waist, dropping his forehead to the man's back. He came back in at a slightly different angle, testing for what gave the most sensation. Erwin's breath caught each time, and his low murmurs of encouragement spurred Levi on.

As the captain began a slow, steady rhythm, heat crept up his neck and over his cheeks. The sound of their labored breathing filled the air as Erwin started rocking back against him as best he could in his slightly awkward position. It drove Levi's desire to greater heights, and he clenched his teeth on a hissed profanity.

"Hah...Levi," uttered the blond as Levi started stroking Erwin's damp cock.

Levi kissed his shoulder again, then bit into it just hard enough to make it sting. He licked the spot immediately afterwards, just as he had with Erwin's ass after smacking it. He relaxed his hold around Erwin's waist to stroke his stomach and chest with that hand, pinching the nipples one at a time. His pace picked up, and Levi started losing what composure he had left. His hips slapped against Erwin's buttocks as he moved faster and harder against him. Soon, Levi was calling out as if their positions were reversed, because it was better than he could have imagined it would be.

"Not gonna last much longer," warned Levi tensely, shuddering over his companion. His balls were starting to tighten up, and he stroked Erwin off faster, trying his best to make him come before Levi blew his load. His pelvis bucked erratically. Levi was sincerely afraid he was going to end up arriving before his companion and have to make it up to him with a blowjob. He wasn't opposed to sucking Erwin's dick at all, but he'd really wanted the man to come while he was fucking him.

"Don't worry," gasped Erwin.

He looked over his shoulder at Levi, his face flushed and sweaty. Blue eyes met silvery-gray, and as soon as Erwin saw the expression on Levi's face that was the end of it for him. He got an almost pained look, his jaw dropped, and his body went tense all over. Levi felt the big, thick cock in his hand jerk and buck with the orgasm. Some of it got on his hand and arm, but he sure as hell didn't mind the splatter.

"Good boy," approved Levi in a rough, strained voice.

He gave Erwin's dick another stroke before releasing it, grabbing the blond's hips and slamming into him, now desperate to have his own release. Both of them cried out when it happened. Levi had never experienced coming inside of a partner without barrier protection before, and apparently, neither had Erwin. The intimacy of the moment was beyond description. Both of them were trembling, and Levi managed to stay upright for long enough to finish spurting inside of his companion. Then he collapsed on top of Erwin, panting heavily against his shoulder. Erwin's strength seemed to have bled out too.

After some time, Levi pulled out and rolled off of Erwin's back. The blond turned over as well, and he took Levi into his arms and pulled him close in a warm, sweaty embrace. They were both in the wet spot, and Levi was sure his cum was dripping out of Erwin's ass. This was one of those moments in which he didn't care about the mess, though. He kissed Erwin's chest, and he sighed in contentment. Erwin nuzzled Levi's hair, stroking his back with slow, languid fingers.

For how long they remained that way, both silent and comfortable with each other's embrace, Levi couldn't say. Erwin was naturally the first to break the silence.

"How was I?"

Levi pulled back to look him in the eyes. His first impulse was to downplay Erwin's performance, because Levi had always been a believer in tough love. Compliment someone too much, and they might get lazy. Encourage, but critique. He couldn't bring himself to do that in this moment, though. Not only had they both waited for two lifetimes to be together like this, but Erwin had been willing to take a role that Levi knew wasn't his usual preference, and he'd allowed Levi to satisfy a guilty pleasure and spank his ass, too.

"Fan-fucking-tastic," he told him sincerely.

Erwin's handsome smile flashed white teeth, and Levi was briefly dazzled by the sight. The commander had always had a nice smile, but there was something almost boyish about the enthusiasm and sheer joy in this one. Levi, against his will, started to smile back at him.

"So were you," assured Erwin, his smile fading a little in an awed expression. "Goddamn, Levi...if I could make you smile like that even once each day..." he trailed off, and some powerful emotion lit up the blue of his eyes.

Levi found himself swallowing an unexpected lump in his throat. Hanji had been completely right about the two of them, and they had so much history together; most of it painful. He tried to just bask in the first truly happy moment he'd had in a long while, but looming in the back of his mind was the fact that he would have to deploy again at the end of the week, and he had just three days to spend with this man.

"I think if anyone could manage that, it'd be you," Levi finally said, stumbling a little over the words. It sounded so cheesy, but he didn't really mind because he felt so close to Erwin, right now.

Levi levered himself up, and he straddled Erwin's hips smoothly. He bent over to kiss the blond deeply, his tongue briefly tracing Erwin's lips before Levi parted his own. Taking his cue, Erwin took over the kiss, sliding his tongue in to caress and stroke Levi's. The captain purred in his throat, sliding his fingers through Erwin's sweat-dampened hair.

He would live in the moment, Levi decided, and he would come back when his tour was over and be in one piece. They finally had a chance to be together, and he had no intention of allowing death separate them again until they were old men.

* * *

-To be continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Get you some, boys. (Sorry for the lack of a recap. I wasn't feeling it this time)


	12. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one's flowing fast for me right now, so have another update! Thanks for all the kudos and comments!

Levi was awake before Erwin the next morning, and he decided to make them both breakfast. The blond came into the kitchen just as Levi was finishing up, and he came up behind the smaller man. Levi didn't hear him coming, and when he felt a touch on his shoulder, he reacted instinctively.

"Whoa," yelled Erwin as the captain spun around and swept his legs out from under him. He landed hard on the kitchen floor, banging his head against the counter island in the process. Levi stood over him with wide eyes, just as startled as Erwin was.

"Shit," sighed Levi. He reached down to offer the robed blond a hand up, flushing guiltily. "Don't sneak up on me like that."

"A mistake I won't be making again," agreed Erwin with a grunt. He got to his feet, and he rubbed the back of his smarting head. "I thought you knew I was there."

"You walk softer than you think," informed Levi. "Sorry for dropping you on your ass like that."

Erwin shrugged, gazing down at his lover with admiration. Clad only in the pair of black pajama pants Levi bought the day before, he was such an attractive vision that the writer could forgive him easily. He bent over, cupped Levi's face in his hands and kissed him soundly on the lips.

"Did you sleep well?"

"Better than I have in a year," assured Levi. "Hope you like your eggs scrambled. I found some bacon, too. You don't mind me helping myself to your kitchen, do you?"

"To cook me a nice breakfast? Not at all." Erwin smiled at him, and he stepped back to allow Levi to plate up the food. "By the way; my parents will be coming by today. I just got a text from my mother confirming it."

Levi handed Erwin's plate over to him, tilting his head. "Oh yeah? When? Should I find somewhere to go for a while?"

"Why would you need to leave?" Erwin puzzled. "You're actually the reason they're coming over. They want to meet you. Does that make you feel uncomfortable?"

Levi blinked. "They...want to meet me? I didn't even know you've told them about me."

"I've talked about you to them, and to my friends." Erwin sighed. "I'm sorry, I should have asked you first if you minded meeting them. I was just so happy you'd be staying with me for a few days that it didn't dawn on me you may not be up for meeting them."

Levi lowered his gaze. "It's not that. I've just never been with anyone that wanted me to meet their folks before. I just hope I don't embarrass you with my shitty manners."

"Not possible," assured Erwin gently. He had a seat at the little dining table at the far end of the kitchen, and he smiled at Levi when the captain poured two glasses of milk and joined him. "Thank you. This looks wonderful. And Levi, just be yourself. I want them to meet _you_. I want them to see what I see in you."

Levi paused in sprinkling a little salt on his eggs. He stared at Erwin quietly for a moment, and then he spoke softly. "Sounds pretty serious. Are you proposing to me again, big guy?"

It took Erwin a second to realize what Levi was referring to. Once it dawned on him, Erwin realized that he would indeed like to propose marriage to the man. Levi watched the serious look on his face, and he misunderstood the reason behind it.

"I was just fucking with you, Erwin...thinking of old times."

"That's a shame," murmured Erwin, "because I was just thinking we would make an outstanding married couple."

Levi choked a bit on the bite of food he'd taken, and he quickly had a swallow of his milk. His normally hooded eyes were wide on Erwin. "Oi, that's not funny."

"It wasn't intended to be," assured Erwin. "I think when you return home for good, we should revisit the possibility. I mean it, Levi. I know it may be too soon right now to make such a commitment, but to be completely honest with you, I can't imagine myself ever marrying anyone else. Would you at least think on it while we're apart?"

"I...shit, Erwin, just when I think you can't surprise me anymore." Levi licked his lips, looking slightly panicked. "We don't even know yet what it's like to live with each other."

"Sure we do," argued the blond. "We lived under the same roof for a good while in the previous life. We know each other's quirks, likes and dislikes. It isn't exactly going to be new territory for either of us."

Levi wavered a bit. "Those were different circumstances, though. We weren't fucking, back then."

"Much to my regret," sighed Erwin. He smiled persuasively. "Let me propose a different idea, then. Come and live with me for a while after your service has ended. Give it a month or so, and if you still have doubts about our compatibility in such a living arrangement, I won't pressure you. Personally, I have no concerns."

Levi took a deep breath. "You're really serious about this?"

Erwin nodded. "Absolutely. I want to be with you, even if I have to wait a while longer to make that happen. I told you last night that I would wait for you, and I meant it."

Levi's egg fell off of his fork. Erwin could honestly say he'd never seen the man look so stunned. Finally, after several moments of silence, Levi got up from his chair. For one horrifying minute, Erwin thought the captain was going to walk out on him without a word. Instead, Levi closed the distance between them, squeezed in between Erwin and the table, and straddled his lap. Erwin dropped his fork as the smaller man put his arms around his neck and lowered his mouth to his. Breakfast became a forgotten concept as the two of them kissed, starting out slow and gentle but quickly becoming aggressively passionate.

"What time are your parents coming over?" Levi asked breathlessly, his lips animated against Erwin's.

"Around noon," answered the blond. "I thought we'd all have lunch together. Mother's going to bring her pasta salad and I'll grill up some burgers."

"Sounds perfect," Levi purred. His hands slid down Erwin's body, and one of them burrowed deftly into Erwin's robe. Levi smirked at the resulting gasp from the writer as his hand curled around Erwin's hardened cock. "So that gives us about three hours before we need to get ready. Hmm, what could we do in three hours, Erwin?"

The blond's heart began to pound predictably at the insinuation. Last night Levi had him. Now it seemed he was going to get his turn, but he didn't want to presume anything. "Well, you could demonstrate to me how good you are at riding someone. We could also..."

He didn't know how to say it, so Erwin decided to just show Levi. The captain jumped and gasped when Erwin cracked a palm against his left ass cheek. Levi immediately flushed and bit his lip, a peculiar sound rising in his throat. Erwin rubbed the spot soothingly, and then he gave the other cheek a little smack. Yes, that noise he'd heard was definitely a needy whine, and Levi repeated it beautifully on the second smack.

"I think," breathed the captain, "we'd better move this into the bedroom."

Erwin slid his hand around to the front, and he palmed Levi's swollen package through the pajama pants. There was a spot of dampness there, testament to the smaller man's excitement. "I think that's an excellent plan."

* * *

He'd never done this sort of thing with anyone before, and as they passed through the bedroom doorway lip-locked with each other, Erwin thought they should clarify a few things. "Wait, Levi," he mumbled between kisses. "We should discuss this before we do anything."

"Seriously?" panted the captain, staring up at him with visible dismay. "You know how to smack someone, and I know how to lift my ass up. What more do we need to say about it?"

Erwin chuckled in a pained manner. His groin throbbed with need as his imagination painted a beautiful picture for him. "Yes, but it isn't as simple as you dropping your pants and me spanking you. What if I use too much force? How will I know the signal to let up a bit, if it gets to be too much for you? People generally use some sort of safe word when they do things like this, and I don't want to cause you real harm by accident."

Levi sighed, and he bit his lip. "Guess you've got a good point. Shit, I don't know; you'll be the first person I ever tried this with. What do you think would be a good safe word for me?"

Erwin considered it, rubbing Levi's ass in a circular motion. Given the man's potty mouth, it wouldn't be wise to choose a profanity as the safe word. He gazed into Levi's eyes, and upon thinking about their history together, he came up with a suitable idea. "Freedom," suggested the blond. "If it gets too intense for you, say: 'Freedom', and I'll know to back off."

Levi repeated the word thoughtfully, and he nodded. "That works for me. So, why don't you tell me how you want me, big guy? Bent over the bed? On my stomach? Standing up?"

The options overwhelmed Erwin for a moment. He hadn't even considered what position Levi should be in. He backed away from him, sat down on the bed and patted his lap. "On your stomach, lying across me."

Levi raised a brow, and he smirked. "So far, so good. Want to bind my wrists, too?"

"I...yes. Yes, I would like to do that," stammered Erwin. He was starting to salivate. It wasn't just the kinkiness of restraining Levi that got him so hot; it was also the captain's open trust in him. Erwin looked around for something to use, and his gaze fell on his closet door. "Go and select one of my ties from the closet, Levi."

"Sure."

Erwin watched as his lover went to do as he said, and he scratched his chin. He wished he'd thought to shave before doing this, but he hadn't expected Levi to jump him in the middle of breakfast and get him so hot and bothered. Hopefully, he wouldn't mind the stubble too much. Levi had obviously already shaved this morning himself, and Erwin felt a little scruffy compared to him.

"I like this green one," Levi announced as he retrieved one of the ties hanging in the closet. He stretched it out and tested the material. "It's soft material, but strong. I shouldn't be able to break it."

Erwin stared at him as Levi approached with a come-hither look in his eyes. He swallowed. "Are you _sure_ you've never done this with anyone before? You really seem to know what you're doing."

Levi shrugged, and he offered the tie to Erwin. "I do read, you know. People usually do a little research on subjects that interest them."

That made Erwin laugh softly. Somehow, he had trouble picturing Levi looking up bondage porn online, but then again, this was a kink of his that Erwin never would have expected of him anyways. "And you say I'm full of surprises. I think you have me beat."

"Nah, this is probably the only thing I never told you about me before." Levi trembled a little, so subtly that Erwin almost didn't detect it. "You want my hands in front, or tied behind my back?"

"Behind your back," whispered Erwin, and he hoped he wasn't making a mistake. There was vulnerability in Levi's eyes gave rise to protective feelings. "Do you feel safe enough for that, Levi?"

The captain tilted his head in a considering manner, and then he nodded decisively. "With you? Yeah. With anyone else, probably not. If it weren't for you, I might go my whole life without trying it."

That admission only made Erwin even more enamored with him. He put his arms around Levi's waist, pulling him close to hug him. The captain stroked Erwin's hair as the bigger man pressed his cheek against his chest.

"Why so dramatic?" questioned Levi huskily. "I'm inviting you to spank my ass, not saving your life."

Erwin chuckled, and he pulled back to gaze up at him. "Because it means the world to me that you trust me so much. Turn around for me now, please."

Levi did as he was told, and Erwin wrapped the tie strategically around his wrists as the smaller man crossed them over one another at the small of his back.

"Make sure you get it good and tight," advised Levi. "It steps on the point of this if I can wriggle or break free."

"Yes, I agree." Erwin tightened the accessory, but not to the point where it would cut off Levi's circulation. "How's this?"

Levi tested the restraint, his biceps flexing and bulging. He grunted a little. The material held. "Yeah, that's good. You've got me at your mercy, creep."

Erwin couldn't even pretend to take offence at the insult, knowing it was coming from a place of affection and only meant to tease him. He turned Levi back around, and he helped him onto the bed. Guiding him down so that the captain's pelvis was resting on his lap, his erection pushing between Erwin's thighs, the blond considered how to best proceed. Levi had his head turned, facing the foot of the bed. Erwin almost grabbed one of the pillows to put under his head, but then he reconsidered when he thought it might make it harder for Levi to breathe. He stroked the smaller man's back, tracing the smooth skin where Levi would have once had harness marks branded into him from his ODM gear. Aside from faded scars here and there, his body was unmarked and unblemished.

"So soft," commented Erwin, running his palms steadily over Levi's shoulders and back. He hooked his fingers into the waistband of Levi's pajama pants, and he pulled them down slowly, almost reverently. He smoothed his hands over the muscular roundness of the captain's ass, watching his face as he touched him. Levi was blushing with arousal, and another little tremor went through him. It was now that Erwin realized it wasn't fear that made him tremble, but excitement.

"Would you like me to fuck you after I've properly disciplined you, soldier?"

Levi's breath caught, and his eyes squeezed shut. He moistened his lips with the tip of his tongue, and he nodded.

"Say it, Levi," encouraged Erwin in a gentle, husky voice. He rubbed the captain's bottom in a circular motion, feeling it tense beneath his hand with anticipation. It made Erwin ache, and talking dirty came easier for him than expected. "Tell me you want my dick inside of you."

Levi's cock twitched against Erwin's thigh, exposed now that the blond had pulled down his pants. "I want you to fuck me hard," he rasped. "Fuck me like you own me, sir."

That raw, passionate answer nearly had Erwin unhinged. He had to stop rubbing Levi's ass and take a deep breath, lest he disgrace himself and arrive before he could even begin. When he felt like he had regained enough control over his lust to trust himself, Erwin drew his right hand back. It landed with a sharp crack against Levi's left ass cheek, and the captain hissed in reaction. Erwin did it again twice more, and then he gave the right cheek the same attention. He hoped that he was doing it right. He would just have to trust Levi to let him know.

Erwin started spanking his lover steadily, increasing the force of his smacks little by little. Levi started to squirm and pant. Low whines escaped his lips, and his precum was soon wetting Erwin's robe. The captain's voice started to get hoarse with desperation, but he hadn't asked the blond to stop. His perfect little ass was blushing scarlet, and Erwin spoke to him with a voice equally roughened with carnal need.

"You remember your safe word?" He paused for a moment, rubbing the abused cheeks as he awaited Levi's response. Erwin prudently slipped his other hand beneath Levi's hips to squeeze the base of his cock and prevent orgasm.

"Y-yeah," gasped Levi. "I...remember... _shit_!"

Erwin resumed spanking him before he could even finish talking. His hand was stinging probably as much as Levi's backside was, but he kept going, fascinated by the sight of Levi's reddened ass. He saw the captain clench his jaw, and he noticed the increasingly dazed look in his eyes. It was like Levi was getting a high off of this, and Erwin vaguely recalled reading somewhere that this sort of thing released endorphins for some recipients. That certainly seemed to be the case with his little love, but he was starting to worry that they were taking things too far and Levi was too out of it to call out his safe word. His vocalizations got louder and louder, as if Levi had lost all ability to contain the volume of them.

"F-freedom," whimpered Levi at last, panting like an injured animal.

Erwin immediately stopped, and he stroked Levi's now-sweaty hair to both sooth and reward him. "Deep breaths," he advised softly, trying to calm his own desire enough to think straight. Levi's eyes were closed again, and he was shuddering helplessly. Erwin gave his dick a slow stroke, and then another. He leaned over to grab one of the lubricant packs Levi had left on his beside table last night, and he stopped fondling the captain to break the tab off of the tube. He warmed it in his hands for a moment before squirting it between Levi's buttocks.

"You did very good," Erwin praised sincerely. In fact, he was a little amazed that Levi had lasted for that long, considering the way he'd started screaming by the end of it. "My perfect, beautiful Levi. You've made me very happy."

Levi opened his eyes to look up at him. His lips were parted and shiny with saliva. The flush in his face started to fade a little as he calmed down. It came back almost immediately when Erwin eased a finger into him, and Levi moaned his name.

"Oh fuck," gasped the captain tensely, his bound hands clenching into fists. "Shit...Erwin...hah...forgot what it...feels like!"

Erwin almost stopped in surprise, one finger buried deeply inside of Levi to the knuckle. Just how long _had_ it been since Levi last did this with anyone? "Am I hurting you?"

Levi shook his head rapidly. "N-no. Not hurting. Feels good...feels _damned_ good. Nnngh! Especially there!"

Levi had bucked when Erwin stroked his prostate experimentally, and the blond smiled with satisfaction. "You're very sensitive, Levi."

"N-no shit," groaned the smaller man. His eyes went blank when Erwin fondled a nipple with his other hand, and he realized that to say Levi was sensitive was actually an understatement. How in the world the man had such a high pain threshold with such responsive erotic zones was an interesting thing to ponder. Erwin soon forgot his questions about the contradiction of sensitivity and pain tolerance. Levi was being so sensual in his pleasure, and he vocalized more than Erwin had ever imagined he would.

Soon, Erwin had Levi stretched with two fingers, and he waited for some of the tightness to ease up before inserting a third. It took time and patience; the captain was a small man and it was obvious that he hadn't taken it anally for a good while. Levi humped Erwin's lap desperately as the blond fingered him, and he started begging for more.

"Erwin," growled Levi, "put it in! Fuck, you're killing me here."

"Not yet," insisted Erwin. If living with his size endowments had taught Erwin anything, it was that his partners needed plenty of preparation to avoid getting hurt by him. He wasn't about to ruin this encounter by getting too hasty. He bent over the prone captain, brushing his lips against Levi's shoulder before straightening up again.

"Just a while longer," assured Erwin as the smaller man groaned again. "Be patient, and be still."

Levi's breath was coming out ragged, but he complied with Erwin's instructions and stopped squirming. Erwin stopped teasing Levi's nipples to grab another pack of lubricant, and then he withdrew his fingers from inside of him. He thought about it for a moment before deciding on a position. He probably shouldn't take him missionary style, as much as Erwin liked the thought of pinning this gorgeous body beneath him. "Sit up, Levi. I'll help you."

With a grunt of effort, Levi got up on his knees with Erwin's assistance. He was panting softly as he watched the blond lie down on the bed, and his hungry, pale gaze went straight to Erwin's cock as the writer parted his robe to expose himself. As Levi watched, Erwin broke open the packet and started slicking the substance within over his erection. Levi seemed mesmerized by the sight of Erwin stroking himself slowly. Erwin smiled slyly at him, enjoying the expression of open lust on Levi's face.

"Do you want this, Captain?"

Levi's throat worked as he swallowed. "You fucking tease."

"If I were a tease," reasoned Erwin, "I would stop now and leave you unfulfilled. I have no intention of doing that, but I may reconsider if you misbehave."

Levi narrowed his eyes at him. "You wouldn't do that. You're just as horny as I am."

"True," conceded Erwin, "but I could keep going until I get myself off. You wouldn't want that, would you?"

Levi groaned and shut his eyes. "No."

"No, what?" Erwin raised a brow expectantly.

"No sir," Levi said through clenched teeth, opening his eyes again to glare at him. "Should have known you'd be this devious."

Erwin sobered a bit at the accusation. Fun was fun, but he'd prolonged this moment for long enough. "Come here, Levi. Ride me."

The smaller man immediately walked on his knees to him, straddling Erwin's legs as he worked his way up the bigger man's body. He whimpered when Erwin stopped lubing up and reached up to tweak Levi's nipples. The captain's abs tensed, a shiver went through him and his spank-heated ass rested on Erwin's thighs. Erwin stroked his palms over Levi's chest and down. He cupped one narrow hip, and with his other hand, he grasped his own cock to position it.

"Lift up," instructed Erwin. Levi did so, and as soon as Erwin was butting at his entrance, the smaller man started easing down onto him. Erwin went still and allowed Levi to have control of how much he took in. His jaw tightened with the pleasure of feeling Levi slowly sheathing his length. It had been a long time for him, too. He hadn't really put much thought into it before now, but as Levi lifted up a little and eased down again, taking more of Erwin's cock inside of him.

"You're amazing," husked Erwin, staring up at him raptly. He'd nearly untied Levi's wrists so that he could use his hands, but he didn't seem to be having any balance issues. Erwin let go of the base of his cock, and he stroked the smaller man's pale, athletic body. He circled Levi's nipples with his fingertips, making them immediately go erect.

Levi's breath shuddered in his chest, and he went still for a moment. There was a look of concentration on his face that suggested he was trying to adjust to Erwin's girth. The blond kept holding still, but it was a test of sheer willpower. Erwin groaned when Levi started moving again and he finally impaled himself to the hilt on his dick. Erwin stroked the captain's trembling thighs, waiting for the signal that it was okay for him to start moving.

"So fucking big," Levi moaned, and then he began to roll his hips slowly, with practiced skill.

It was Erwin's turn to have a blank, dazed expression on his face. Levi felt incredible, and despite his earlier admission that he hadn't been penetrated for a while, he clearly knew what he was doing. Erwin's groans soon joined the captain's as he carefully began to thrust upwards, matching Levi's pelvic motions. Levi bowed his head, and his bangs fell forward to conceal his eyes as he huffed and rocked on top of Erwin.

"Harder," Levi pleaded. "I...can't get the...momentum I want with my hands...behind my back like this."

Erwin needed no further encouragement. He pumped his hips with greater force, and he knew he had a good angle when Levi cried out. Now as red-faced as the captain, Erwin cupped Levi's hips to guide the smaller man's motions. He lifted him each time he withdrew, and he yanked him down with each thrust. Levi's cries increased in pitch, volume and frequency.

Wanting to see what the man could do without his hands restrained, Erwin started to hastily undo the tie lashing his lover's wrists behind his back. As soon as it was loose enough, Levi yanked his arms from behind his back. He placed one hand flat against Erwin's chest, and he grabbed a handful of blond hair with the other. Levi bent over Erwin, kissed him hard, and then proceeded to bounce on top of him with startling aggression.

Erwin wasn't prepared for it. He'd guessed Levi would be a tornado in bed when bottoming, just as he'd been while topping. He didn't count on the man using quite so much bruising force, though. Erwin thought his eyes were going to go crossed with the intensity of it, and he started vocalizing as much as Levi.

"Fuck...Levi!" He was going to break Erwin's pelvis, at this rate.

"Too much for you?" panted Levi with a tense smirk. He slowed down, rotating his hips in a circular motion and tossing his head back. "Mmm, right there."

It was too much. Erwin couldn't stick to his plan to let Levi ride him until they both finished. He grabbed the smaller man's hips, rolled him over onto his back and sat back on his heels. Propping Levi's feet up on his shoulders, Erwin started pounding into him at a desperate, excited pace.

Levi had asked him to fuck him like he owned him, and that was exactly what Erwin would do. Levi shouted his name, grabbing the bed sheets by the fistful. He cussed, he mewled and he whined in the most endearing, beautiful way.

"Coming," warned Levi tightly, staring up at Erwin's tense face with the most satisfying look on his face. He almost looked bewildered, like he was having his first orgasm ever. Apparently it was just a really hard one that Levi wasn't sure how to cope with, because he screamed Erwin's name and reached for his hands. "Ahh... _aaahhh...ERWIN!_ "

Erwin squeezed Levi's hands in his, holding them down on either side of the captain's body. Levi came so hard that he curled up beneath Erwin, and he shook from head to toe. It was an absolutely beautiful sight, topped only by the vision of his cum splattering all over the place.

Erwin growled his name, and he pumped more rapidly. It only took another minute or two for him to follow Levi into climax, and it was just as intense for him. Tense and shaking himself, Erwin filled Levi to the brim. He held onto his hands until the orgasm faded away, and then he stretched out on top of the captain, still buried deep inside of him. Erwin had to hunch his back to kiss Levi on the mouth, and he took his time with it, caressing the other man's tongue with his.

Once they both calmed down, Erwin withdrew gently from Levi, and he rolled off of him onto his side. He pulled the smaller man into his embrace, kissing Levi's heated forehead. He felt guilty for taking him in a position he'd initially decided against, and Erwin rubbed Levi's bottom tenderly.

"Did I chafe you too much?" asked the blond after a moment.

"I wouldn't have noticed if you did," sighed Levi in a contented voice. "Your dick felt too good for me to think about anything else, but yeah...my ass is pretty sore now."

"I was afraid of that," murmured Erwin. "I wasn't going to use a position that put any pressure or friction on it, but you got me so damned excited that I lost my head."

"I'm not complaining," Levi assured him. Then he winced as Erwin's hand stroked a particularly sore spot.

"I'm going to get some frozen peas," decided Erwin.

Levi pulled back to stare at him like he'd just told him he had a pet unicorn. "What? Where did _that_ come from?"

"For your backside," explained Erwin, smiling at him. "The cold might sooth it and prevent some bruising."

"Oh." Levi seemed a little embarrassed for not realizing what he'd meant. "Yeah, that might help."

Erwin kissed him softly before taking his arms from around Levi and sitting up. "Just relax. I'll be right back. I think I have some Epsom salt I can sprinkle into the bath for you, if you want to try that. I'm sure you'll want to get cleaned up before lunch."

"Sounds like a good plan," agreed Levi, watching him with sleepy, satisfied eyes. "You gonna bathe with me?"

"Of course."

Erwin started to close up his robe, but then he realized that he would get cum all over it if he did that. He left it hanging open, and he exited the bedroom to go and collect the items he'd suggested. When he came back with the bag of frozen peas, he found Levi sound asleep. Erwin smiled down at him, watching him for a moment. Levi looked so cute in his sleep, with his hands folded beneath his cheek in a picturesque way. Erwin stroked his hair softly, and he made use of the warm washcloth he'd brought back with him. He wiped Levi down with it to clean up the worst of the mess, and then he carefully pressed the bag of peas against his reddened ass.

"Shit, that's cold!"

Levi jerked awake immediately, and Erwin braced himself, half-expecting to be struck. The captain restrained himself, however. He compressed his lips and endured it.

"I'm sorry for giving you such a rude awakening," offered the blond. "I would have warned you, but you were sleeping so peacefully. I suppose I'd hoped you would have a tolerance to cold as well as a tolerance to pain and sleep through it."

"You're fine," Levi sighed. He dropped his head back down on the pillow, closing his eyes. "I don't do so well with sudden cold. I can handle it if I know it's coming, but not if it takes me by surprise."

"I understand. How does it feel now?"

Levi shrugged. "Uncomfortable, but you gave me exactly what I asked for and then some." He smirked with satisfaction.

"Does this mean you would like more encounters like that in the future?"

Levi cracked his eyes opened, looking up at him. "Yeah, but in moderation. I don't need to be spanked every time we fuck to get off. Nice to know you're willing to do it, though."

Erwin bent over to give Levi a kiss. "I'm glad to have pleased you. I didn't expect to enjoy it myself, as much as I did."

"Oh yeah?" Levi huffed his little non-laugh. "And I was so worried you wouldn't get into it. Thought you'd think I'm a pervert for sure, when I parted with that little nugget."

"No more than I am," assured Erwin. He lay down beside Levi, still holding the frozen peas secure against the smaller man's backside. "I admit though, I was starting to worry about you near the end of the spanking session. You seemed to go into a swoon of sorts, and I wondered if we were going too far."

"Yeah, it gave me a high," agreed Levi. "I tried to ride it out longer. Didn't expect to actually end up _using_ the safe word. I guess I thought I was tougher than I am."

"Levi, I was slapping your ass _very hard_ by the time you finally had enough. There's no shame in admitting your own threshold, and neither of us are practiced in that sort of play."

"Hmph. When you put it that way..." Levi sighed, and he cuddled against Erwin trustingly. "You did really good, though. I'm surprised I didn't blow you off the bed when I came."

Erwin snorted with amusement. "Now _there's_ an interesting visual."

* * *

The couple bathed together a half an hour later. Erwin shaved afterward, and they sat down together for a cup of tea. By the time they finished and Erwin prepared the meat for the burgers, the doorbell rang. Erwin excused himself, and he went to answer the door. Levi watched curiously as his lover exchanged hugs with an older woman with light brown hair and blue eyes to match Erwin's. A more reserved hug was exchanged between him and the tall blond man that came in behind the woman. Levi had forgotten to ask Erwin if he'd been born to the same parents he'd had in his past life, and he realized he'd never had a clue what the commander's family members looked like.

"Mom, Dad, I'd like you to meet Levi," introduced Erwin after stepping away from them. He smiled at the captain, who was dressed in a button up white shirt and a pair of black trousers. "Captain Levi, to be exact. This is the man that protected me while I was overseas."

Erwin's mother beamed at Levi with open gratitude. "We've already heard so much about you, Captain. Thank you for watching over our son."

"He didn't stay over there as long as we expected," pointed out Mr. Smith. He glanced at his son with hazel eyes as he shook Levi's hand. "I was hoping he might get inspired while there and rethink his career choice."

Erwin sighed tiredly. "Dad, not today, please."

To Levi, it sounded like the two of them must argue about this subject a lot. He decided to come to Erwin's rescue as his father opened his mouth to give a rebuttal. "It's hell over there."

Mr. Smith paused, looking at Levi curiously. "I imagine it is. War is never pretty."

"Trust me, sir, you wouldn't want Erwin to be in the military right now," Levi went on as politely as possible. Though he tried to show Erwin's dad respect, he didn't try to sugarcoat anything. "I lost most of my platoon in a firefight, just before Erwin left. I've lost count of how many tags I've retrieved from dead soldiers serving over there. Erwin's much better off where he is now."

Everyone went silent, and Levi held Mr. Smith's gaze until the man looked away. "I see. It sounds like you've had a lot of experience."

"More than I'd like," concurred Levi with a nod. He looked to Erwin's mother. "You were in the military police, from what I understand."

"Retired now, but yes." Mrs. Smith sighed. "I don't mind saying that I rarely miss those days. Bless you for all you've done for our country, Captain Levi."

Levi shrugged, uncomfortable as always with such praise. Yes, it was good that people respected those who served and risked life and limb, but he didn't feel like the hero some people made him out to be. He was just a soldier, doing what needed to be done and trying to live with himself each day for it. He could see by the look in Mrs. Smith's eyes that she understood at least a little better than her husband, even if she'd never experienced war during her service.

"Well, I'd better get the hamburgers on the grill," decided Erwin. "Mom, you can put your salad on the kitchen counter, if you want."

"Oh, it's in the car," she said. "I'll just go and get that now. I was just so excited to meet your friend that I forgot to bring it in with me."

Erwin nodded, and he looked to his father. "Dad, would you like a beer? You know how to operate the television remote if you'd like to watch something while I'm cooking."

Something about his stance told Levi that he was nervous, but the captain couldn't imagine what about. Yeah, his dad was being kind of a dick, but obviously Erwin was used to that. He started to rub his ass automatically when it throbbed with a residual sting, but Levi stopped himself. Massaging his butt in front of Erwin's parents was definitely not a good way to make an impression.

"I might take you up on that offer," said Mr. Smith while Levi wondered how he was going to sit through the meal without wincing.

"I'll help you with those burgers," Levi informed Erwin, uncomfortable with the thought of trying to make small talk with his parents while Erwin cooked. He followed Erwin out to the back after the blond got a beer for his dad. Once they were alone outside and Erwin had the burgers placed on the grill, Levi leaned closer to him.

"Oi, what's got you so jumpy?" whispered Levi.

Erwin gave him a surprised look. "You think I'm jumpy?"

"Either that, or you've got a caffeine buzz from the tea we drank earlier." Levi folded his arms over his chest. "What's on your mind, blondie?"

Erwin glanced at the back door as if checking to be sure neither of his parents were there. "There's something I need to do during this lunch visit, and I'm trying to find the courage to go through with it."

Levi frowned. "What do you mean?" He too glanced toward the door, and he lowered his voice further. "Are you gonna tell your dad off for good? Because I'd kind of like to see that after the way he talked to you in there."

Erwin smiled crookedly, and he flipped the burgers over. "No, although it may come to that before this gathering ends. You'll understand soon enough, Levi. Just bear with me and try not to lose your temper."

Erwin patted him on the arm, and Levi stared at him as the blond went back inside to fetch himself a beer. "What in the fuck are you about to do, Smith?" wondered the captain.

* * *

Levi did get his answer a while later, once the food was cooked and everyone sat down at the table. Erwin watched his father dress his hamburger with a growing sense of dread, and he reminded himself that the longer he put this off, the worse it was going to be. He'd agreed to introduce Levi to his parents for a very special reason. He would have kept Levi all to himself while he was there, if this weren't so important to him.

"I need to make an announcement," Erwin said, pushing himself to go through with it before he lost his nerve.

"Oh?" His mother paused in scooping up a helping of her pasta salad. "What is it, dear? Oh, is it about the new book you're working on? Have you already finished it?"

"No, not yet," he answered, trying not to drift off track. "It's going to take much longer than I expected to write, and it isn't even the material I was originally planning on. This is about me, Mother. There's something I've been wanting to tell you both for a while, and...it's very important."

Both of his parents watched as Erwin boldly reached out to cover Levi's nearest hand with his own. His father's eyes widened a bit. There was no mistaking the intimacy of the touch for something casual and friendly. Levi went still as well, and he turned his head to look at Erwin with an expression that asked him what in the hell he thought he was doing. The blond took a steadying breath. He hadn't discussed it with Levi, because he wasn't sure if he could go through with it. He'd told him that his parents wanted to meet his "friend", and so Levi hadn't said or done anything to give away the truth of it.

"I'm gay," Erwin stated. "Or rather, bisexual with a stronger preference for males. Levi is much more than a friend to me."

The silence was thick enough to cut with a knife, and Erwin squeezed the hand he was holding, silently begging his lover for support. Levi turned his hand around in Erwin's, and he squeezed back. The captain's face fell into his usual deadpan expression, revealing nothing of his thoughts. His actions, however, spoke louder than words.

Mr. Smith slowly reached for his napkin to wipe at his mouth, though he had yet to take a bite of anything. Mrs. Smith blinked several times. Finally, Erwin's dad broke the silence.

"For how long?"

Erwin felt a wave of frustration. "My whole life. This didn't just happen out of the blue, Dad."

"I think he meant for how long have you known," clarified Mrs. Smith. "You were always so popular with the girls, Erwin. This is just...unexpected."

"It took time for me to accept and come to terms with it," explained Erwin. "Yes, I dated girls. Yes, I liked them, but eventually I realized that I was more attracted to boys. I didn't want to disappoint you and Father, so I kept dating women and I tried to make it work. I believed that one day I might meet a woman special enough to make me forget my attraction to other men. When I met Levi, I knew that was never going to happen."

Erwin smiled at Levi. "I wanted you both to meet him, in the hopes that once you did, you might understand better. He's very special."

Levi lowered his gaze, and his expression finally altered slightly. His mouth twitched as if he wanted to smile, but it could have easily have been a grimace he was holding back.

Erwin's father put his napkin down with a slap to the table. He stood up, looked at his wife and said one cold sentence. "Constance, we're leaving."

"Now just a minute," she protested, looking between her now pale son and her husband. "We should talk about this! Erwin, if Captain Levi makes you happy, then—"

" _Now_ , Constance!" snapped Mr. Smith. "I won't sit here and listen to this for another minute!"

Erwin squeezed Levi's hand harder. He'd been bracing for this kind of reaction, but having his father just walk out on him without even trying to hear him out and understand was harder to take than Erwin expected. He looked at his mother helplessly, and he knew he was failing to hide the devastation he felt. She looked like she wanted to cry, but she left with her husband without collecting the bowl of salad she'd made. She turned to look at Erwin as they exited the kitchen, and she made a gesture like she was holding a phone to her ear and mouthed that she would call him later.

Erwin sat frozen in his seat with Levi's hand still clutched in his, and he wondered just how badly he'd fucked up by coming out of the closet this way. When he could work up enough sense to speak to his lover, Erwin couldn't even look at him.

"Levi, what is the Scout Militia's stance on gay soldiers?"

Levi squeezed his hand a little tighter. "If you're worried they'd kick me out for being gay, don't. They don't give a fuck which way their soldiers swing, as long as we conduct ourselves and keep it private."

Erwin finally looked at him, aggrieved. "You're certain of that?"

"Yeah." Levi nodded, and his brows pinched. "You're worried your old man is going to try and get me in trouble?"

"The thought has crossed my mind, yes." Erwin sighed, and he rubbed the bridge of his nose with his free hand. "I'm so sorry, Levi. I did this all wrong. I knew he would be upset, but I had hopes that he would be more reasonable after meeting you. I put you on the spot without warning, and it blew up in my face."

Levi pulled his hand out of Erwin's grasp, leaned closer to him and cupped the blond's face in his hands. He slapped his cheeks gently, and he held his gaze. "Oi, listen to me. You've got nothing to apologize for. I get why you didn't say anything, just like I always got it in the past when you would keep things vague until you were sure about what you were planning to do. I know you weren't keeping it on the down low just to fuck with me, okay?"

"But I still should have told you," insisted Erwin. "Damn it, I'm always doing things like this, and you are the _one_ person I should trust implicitly to share these things with."

Levi shrugged. "It's who you are, genius. Most of your plans worked, too. Quit being such a hardass with yourself over it. I knew something was up, and if I'd really paid attention, I probably would have picked up on your cues without needing to be told. You were obviously conflicted about it."

"Yes, very conflicted," sighed Erwin. "I nearly didn't go through with it. I still wish I'd been more honest with you and let you know beforehand, rather than just blurt it out."

"Sounded to me like it was spur of the moment," reasoned Levi. "Maybe you were debating over it, but you didn't know for sure you were going to go through with it until that minute. It surprised me, but I wasn't pissed off."

Erwin lowered his gaze. "That's very generous of you, Levi. I know my father, though. He may calm down eventually, but I'm sure right now he feels personally insulted. He isn't likely to let this go for a while."

"He'll just make an ass of himself if he tries to get me in trouble," said Levi. He took his hands off Erwin's face, and he grabbed up his beer to have a sip of it. "He can knock himself out with that. My superiors aren't going to give a shit. You're a civilian, not one of my soldiers or superiors."

Erwin nodded, closing his eyes. "I don't know what I'm going to do to absolve this situation, though." He felt sick to his stomach.

"Hey, they're your parents," excused Levi. "There's nothing wrong with wanting their acceptance. At least your mom seemed pretty understanding. Maybe she can talk your dad down and get him to see some fucking reason."

"Maybe," Erwin said doubtfully. He opened his eyes and looked at Levi again. "Even if she can't, I refuse to let this damage my relationship with you. Honestly, I thought they already suspected the truth."

"Maybe they did, and they were just in denial," postulated the captain. "Give it some time, and if your father still wants to be a shitty bigot about it, at least you don't have to hide it anymore."

Right now, that was a cold comfort to Erwin. He tried to maintain stoicism and treat this like any other problem he would deal with. Erwin usually had a way of solving his issues with enough patience and care, but how was he to change another person's attitude?

"You're over-thinking things again," observed Levi softly. "You're starting to look green. You aren't gonna puke, are you?"

"No, but I've lost my appetite." Erwin stared listlessly at his plate.

Levi went quiet and thoughtful for a moment, and then he managed to surprise Erwin yet again. "Hey, why don't you take me to Ehrmich to see my mom, instead of me catching a flight? It's not too far of a drive, and you could stay with me at her place until I've got to deploy again."

Erwin didn't quite know how to respond. "You want me to meet your mother?"

"Sure, why not?" Levi shrugged. "She already knows I'm into guys, and she's fine with it. I'll bet she'd be thrilled to meet you. She's been on my case to settle down with someone for a while now. No need to try and hide anything from her."

Erwin gave a dry smile. "Now you're just showing off."

"That wasn't my aim. I just thought it would give us a little more time together, and you can get away for a couple of days. She lives in a pretty quiet neighborhood, so you could being your laptop and get some writing done, if you want."

Erwin considered it, warmed by the offer. It would be nice to be around a parent that wouldn't freak out over their relationship, and he knew it was a big step for Levi to offer such a thing. Erwin didn't take him for the kind of man that was big on introducing his dates to his mother.

"I would like to meet your mother," decided Erwin.

"Good, then I'll make adjustments to my flight itinerary, and we could just drive there together on Thursday. You can both take me to the airport and see me off when it's time for me to take my flight back to Maria."

Erwin thought about it. He would like another day to have Levi all to himself, but it didn't seem fair that the captain would only get two days with his mother if they waited until Thursday. "Why don't we leave tomorrow? We could have lunch here, and then get on the road. That should put us in Ehrmich by late afternoon, and it will give you more time with her."

"You sure?" Levi got up, and he started to clean up the forgotten plates, replacing untouched pasta salad back into its bowl and wrapping up the hamburgers for later consumption. He seemed to have found his way around Erwin's kitchen quickly.

"Yes, I'm sure," answered Erwin. "I have nothing preventing me from going away for three days. I've already turned in an article that was due, and all that I currently have going on with my writing is the book I'm working on."

"Oh yeah, about that," Levi said, placing things in the refrigerator, "how's it coming along? Do you have a title for it yet?"

"Actually, yes." Now Erwin's smile was more genuine, but there was also a hint of sadness in it. "The story is about two people that fought together in a world filled with titans. They were in love, but their duties to humanity kept them from acting on it."

Levi glanced away, obviously picking up on the significance. "Sounds depressing."

"It will have a happy ending," assured Erwin. "They meet again in another life, and they remember that they'd been in love."

Now Levi smirked a little. His gray eyes flicked back to Erwin. "So what happens after that? Do they end up together?"

"I haven't gotten to that part of the plot outline yet, but I believe they will. At least, I hope so."

Levi nodded. He rejoined Erwin at the table, propping his elbows on it and putting his chin in his hands. "So it's a love story. What are you going to call it?"

Erwin hadn't decided on a title yet, though he'd made a list of possible ones to use. All of those ideas went right out the window as he thought on how he and Levi initially met, how they got separated and how they reunited in this life.

"' _The End of the Beginning'_ ," answered the blond thoughtfully, and he nodded. "Yes, I think that's going to work."

Levi tilted his head. "Shouldn't it be the other way around? The Beginning of the End?"

"No, because the end of the first part of the book paves the way for the beginning of the second part," explained Erwin. "Does that make sense?"

Levi's brows lifted a little. "Yeah. Yeah, it does." He then shifted the somber mood a little with typical Levi candor. "So is there going to be any fucking in this book? Maybe some spank kink?"

Erwin laughed at that, and he shook his head. "No. I would like to keep certain things private, even if I'm using pseudo names for the characters. Any intimate moments beyond kissing will fade to black and leave it up to the reader's imagination."

Levi seemed to relax a little. "Good, because I wasn't sure how to feel about that."

Erwin scooted closer, and he put an arm around the smaller man. "You've inspired me, and though it isn't my usual genre to write, I think it may be my best story yet."

Levi leaned into the embrace, and he spoke softly. "Then I'll want a copy myself, when it's finished."

* * *

-To be continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Erwin.


	13. Chapter 12

That night together on a couch to watch a movie, ordered takeout from one of Erwin's favorite restaurants, and had another bath together before bed. Neither of them spoke further on what happened with Erwin's parents at lunch. Levi waited for his lover to bring it up, giving him the time and space he needed to work things out in his head. They didn't have intercourse when they went to bed, but they made out for a good, long while. Levi sufficiently and generously distracted Erwin from his troubled thoughts. The captain sucked him off while fingering him until Erwin came with a shout. After that, Levi sprawled out on top of the bigger man, laid his head on his chest and insisted he didn't need reciprocation.

Erwin was grateful for it, though he wouldn't have objected in the slightest if they'd taken it further, regardless of who took which role. He knew that Levi was trying to be considerate of him though, and the smaller man's backside was discolored and sore from the spanking adventure from earlier that morning.

They fell asleep entwined together, and some time in the night, Levi started having a nightmare. Erwin awoke to the sound of a growl. At first, his sleepy mind thought some stray dog was loose outside. Then he realized that the sound was coming from the small man lying on top of him. He felt Levi's fingers clench against his chest, and he heard him mumble something.

When he comprehended what Levi was saying, it broke his heart.

"Erwin, you did well," murmured Levi tightly. "I'll keep my promise to you. I'll end that shitty beast titan. Just...rest now. Couldn't bring you back into hell."

Erwin stroked Levi's back helplessly. He could guess by the content of the half-slurred words and the soft growls of grief coming from Levi that the captain was re-living his death in his dreams. He wondered how often this happened. Obviously, he'd gone out before the captain in the previous life. Those little growls were a result of Levi trying to hold back tears, and Erwin felt warm dampness against his chest where Levi's head rested. He was crying.

_Should I wake him? Sooth him? Should I leave him be and hope it passes for him with no memory of it tomorrow?_

" _I PROMISED HIM!_ "

The raw, anguished cry startled Erwin so badly that he jerked. He'd only heard the man make such a brutally emotional sound once before; when he came across him hacking apart the last of the titans that had slain his two friends. Erwin's decision was made for him by the torment in Levi's protest.

"Levi, wake up." Erwin shook the tense captain gently by one shoulder, while combing through his hair with his other hand. "Come out of it, love. You're dreaming."

Levi's head jerked up, and in the moonlight slanting through the window blinds, Erwin could see how pale his face was. His eyes seemed black because his pupils were so wide, and his breath was coming out jerky and fast. Erwin caressed Levi's face, wiped his tears with his thumb, and he spoke in as calming a voice as possible.

"Shh, it's all right. We aren't there anymore, Levi. We're in my bedroom in Mitras. You're here on temporary leave of duty, remember?"

Levi grabbed at Erwin's shoulders, his eyes finally focusing on the blond's face. He looked desperate, and he scanned him as if making sure he was in one piece. "Er...win..."

"Yes, that's right." Erwin cupped Levi's chin, drawing his lips to his for a kiss. He touched the smaller man's chest with his other hand. Levi's heart was racing. "I'm right here, Levi."

Levi's breathing started to calm down. His heart was still beating fast and hard, but he seemed to be coming back to himself. Levi clutched at Erwin for another moment, and then he ran his hands over his body. He slid up a little, and he crushed his mouth against the blond's in a desperate kiss. Erwin ignored the abuse of Levi's teeth digging against his lips. He parted his mouth to let the captain's tongue in, and he caressed it with his own. He winced slightly when Levi grabbed and handful of his hair and tugged a little, but he didn't object.

"Don't you go anywhere again, you bastard." Levi's voice was still raw and breathy. His eyes still glittered with the threat of further tears.

"I won't," promised Erwin, though logically, that wasn't a promise that anyone in the world could make with any certainty. Things happened all the time, whether through war or unfortunate happenstance. Erwin wasn't about to remind Levi of that little piece of reality, though. His lover needed reassurance, and he would give it to him.

"I am going to be here waiting for you," whispered Erwin against Levi's hair when the smaller man dropped his head to his chest again. "I'm not going anywhere, and wherever you land when you're released from service to come home, I'm going to be there to greet you."

Levi nodded, apparently satisfied. He took a deep, shuddering breath. "Shit, I'm a crybaby."

Erwin smiled, and he kissed the crown of Levi's head. "No, you're human, and you've been through hell. I want you to promise me something too though, Levi."

Levi tilted his head, peering up at Erwin from his position on his chest. "What is it?"

Erwin brushed the captain's dark bangs out of his eyes, making a mental note that Levi could probably use a haircut soon. "You have to return to me. You can't go anywhere, either."

Levi swallowed, and he nodded again. "Promise."

Erwin hugged him tightly, rubbing his back as he did so. He refrained from telling Levi what a beautiful, beautiful man he thought he was. He just cuddled him until Levi's breathing was finally deep and even with sleep.

* * *

"I've got to have a shower...I've got to have a shower..."

Levi dodged Erwin in the short hallway leading to the bathroom, clutching a towel in his hand. They'd procrastinated getting ready for their trip to his mother's house, and now the schedule was off.

It wasn't really anyone's fault; Erwin's mom called to talk to him after breakfast, and they'd had a long, detailed discussion over the phone. Levi had decided to pack for Erwin to speed things up and to give him a chance to speak with her. He didn't know where everything was located though, so he'd had to go digging through Erwin's chest of drawers and his closet to find things. As for himself, he still had everything more or less packed in his duffle bag, save for the new civilian clothes he'd bought and the cravat Erwin had gifted to him.

Erwin followed him into the bathroom, and he spoke to him before approaching—having learned his lesson about sneaking up behind him after being put on the floor in the kitchen.

"Levi, it's all right."

Levi turned to look at the taller man, and he realized he was behaving like a complete douche bag. It was his mother, though. He wanted to be there when he'd told her he would be there, and he didn't want to show up all grungy.

"I just haven't seen her in months," he tried to excuse. He ran his fingers through his hair. "I need another haircut. I need to shave and brush my teeth. I need to—"

"Levi."

The captain stopped at the gentle, yet commanding tone coming from his lover. He looked up at Erwin as the blond approached, still clutching the towel to his bare chest. He'd run through the house buck-naked with it, and he was just now aware of that. A flood of embarrassment struck him.

" _Now_ who's jumpy?" teased Erwin with a fond smile. He bent over to kiss Levi on the nose. "Remember, you weren't scheduled to be in Ehrmich until tomorrow. We may be a half hour to an hour later getting in than we wanted, but we _will_ get there...and you look just fine. I'm sorry to have put you in the position to organize everything while I talked on the phone. Get cleaned up and changed. Your mother isn't going to love you any less if you don't look completely pristine, I'm sure."

His words calmed Levi. The smaller man looked away, pinching his lips. "I didn't realize I was being so fucking frantic."

"Are you nervous about introducing us?"

Levi met Erwin's gaze, and he shook his head without even a second's hesitation. "Not at all. I just want to look good and healthy, so she won't worry so much."

A look of dawning comprehension came over the writer's handsome face. "Ah, I see. Well then, why don't we stop by a barber when we leave?"

Levi was torn. "That might take a little while."

"Not long," persisted Erwin. "You just need a touch-up. Get cleaned up and changed, and while you're doing that, I'll load our things into the car."

Levi bit his lip. "I want to bring the cravat you gave me too, but I don't want to take it back with me to Maria."

"Don't worry, Levi." Erwin bent down again to kiss him on the lips. "I'll bring all of your new clothes back with me to wash and put them away...including the cravat. You should bring it. We could take your mother out to dinner while we're there and you can wear it then."

The irony of how they'd changed roles both in the bedroom and in comforting one another in the space of two days was almost funny. Levi clicked his tongue, annoyed with himself. Well, he'd supported Erwin when his father blew up the day before. Now Erwin was returning the favor. Levi's anxiety wasn't really localized, though.

"Shit."

"Levi?" Erwin gazed at him with concern. "How can I help?"

The captain sighed. "I think I need to take one of my pills. They prescribed me some more for anxiety before I took my leave."

Erwin nodded. "Where are they? I can fetch them for you while you shower."

"Right inner pocket of my duffle bag. If you could just bring me in one with a glass of water, that'd be fine. I don't like to take more than that unless I'm having a serious...panic attack." Levi grimaced, flushing at the reminder of having one of those attacks while in Maria, right in front of Erwin. There was no point in trying to hide it from the man. He'd already seen it happen before, and last night, Erwin had helped him avoid having another one.

"Sorry I'm such a mental case," mumbled Levi.

"You aren't." Erwin rubbed his arm. "You've got PTSD, which is common for soldiers who've seen war. Not to mention the horrors you've recalled from our past life. While we're on the subject, I should confess something to you."

"What's that?" Levi tilted his head curiously, and he hoped Erwin wasn't about to drop a bomb on him. He was tense enough.

"I have prescription medication myself." Erwin frowned a bit. "I don't take it often, but when I started having dreams of the previous life more frequently and in greater detail, I went to see a psychiatrist. I wondered if my imagination was just over-active, or if I might be getting delusional. It particularly worried me when I would have these dreams while awake. Not often, but enough to give cause for concern. The most I've experienced the latter was while I was in Maria, after I met you."

Levi's gaze softened on him. "So you're suffering some PTSD too, huh?"

"Of a sort," agreed Erwin. "If it makes you feel any better, my prescription is for antipsychotics."

Levi's eyes widened a little, then narrowed. "Tch. You aren't crazy."

The blond shrugged. "Well, I know that now. At the time, however, I wasn't so certain. Fortunately, the waking dreams have never hit me while I was driving or doing anything else that requires concentration, but they can be...intense."

Levi nodded. "No shit. I had one that day when you came into my tent and found me losing my shit. That was the first time I ever had one of those things, and the first time I ever got that bad."

"Have you had any more lately?"

Levi shook his head, frowning. "Not since you left. The nightmare last night was the first time I've dreamed about that time period since then."

"Hmm." Erwin scratched his chin. "I haven't dreamed much about it either. It makes me wonder if seeing each other again may have triggered some of those memories for each other."

"Maybe." A flash of the memory of Erwin's death assailed Levi again, and he clenched his jaw. He didn't want to keep thinking of that. Erwin was alive and well, right in front of him. "I'll get in the shower."

"All right. I'll be bring you the medication and some water, as promised. Try to relax, Levi."

Levi nodded, and he draped the towel over the hangar near the shower before opening it up to turn the water on. Erwin was still standing there when Levi adjusted the temperature knobs, and the captain looked over his shoulder at him with a raised brow.

"Either you move faster than I thought, or you haven't even left yet."

Erwin was watching him with appreciative blue eyes, scanning Levi's naked backside. "Sorry. I just wanted to take a moment to enjoy the view. The hand marks on your ass are nearly faded, too."

"Guess you'll have to re-apply them before I deploy again, you pervert." Levi smirked at him before stepping behind the glass door of the shower.

"Don't tempt me," he heard Erwin say, and then the blond retreated from the bathroom.

* * *

The drive to Ehrmich was pleasant and enjoyable. The temperature was mild enough for Erwin to put the top down on his convertible, and he turned the radio up as they cruised along the highway. They talked about little things for a while, like what Levi would like to do next once he was finished serving.

"Well, just because I'll be off active duty doesn't mean I'll be retired," explained Levi. He wore a pair of shades and he had reclined his seat back, folding his hands behind his head in relaxation. "They could put me back on active duty again before that happens, but I think I'd like to try my hand at being an instructor."

"A military instructor?" guessed Erwin. He could definitely see Levi filling out that role.

"Yeah. There's a base in Mitras, if I'm not mistaken. Maybe I could get a transfer there."

Erwin smiled sidelong at him. "I would like that. Does that mean you're in favor of my idea to come and live with me for a while?"

Levi turned his head to look at him, pushing down his shades to peer over them at Erwin. "What do you think?"

"I think you're either teasing me, or you're dropping me a hint. Which is it?"

"Heh. Okay, look." Levi sat up, and he adjusted his seat to the upright position. He turned in it, folding one leg beneath him so that he was comfortably and directly facing Erwin. "I like the idea. I'm just not used to living with anyone else outside a barracks or military camp situation. I'm thinking when I come back after my tour, I can put in for a transfer to your base and get housing there. Doesn't have to be anything fancy, just a single bed and bath apartment like I have at the Ehrmich base."

"I see." Erwin tried not to sound disappointed.

"The only reason I'm thinking of doing it that way is so we can ease into it," Levi further explained. "I'll come stay with you some days of the week, and I'll stay at my place some days of the week. We'd be closer to each other than we'd be if I stayed in Ehrmich, and if it goes well, we can take it further. I just think it's a good idea to have somewhere to go if we both need some space, at least until we confirm this living arrangement you want is going to work for us."

Erwin nodded. "I can see the logic in that. I suppose I'm just too eager."

"Look at it this way: we might have a long history together, but this is new territory for both of us. We're still exploring it, and...I don't want to fuck things up."

Erwin looked at him, and he reached over to put a hand on Levi's nearest knee. "I understand, Levi. Sometimes it takes more than love for two people to live together as a couple. I can be content with starting out your way."

The smaller man relaxed, and he sat back again. "Good. I was trying not to piss you off or make you feel rejected. I never bother with that effort with anyone else, you know."

Erwin chuckled. "I'm sure you don't. By the way, my mother is trying to talk sense into my father, just as you predicted. That's what we spoke about over the phone this morning."

"Oh yeah? Has she made any headway yet?"

Erwin shook his head. "No, not yet. I didn't expect her to get results this soon, though. He'll hold a grudge for a good while."

Levi had a sip of the bottled water resting in his cup holder. "Damned shame, but at least your mom's on your side. Sorry, Erwin."

"Do you know what? I'm not."

Levi turned his head to look at him askew.

Erwin's expression hardened, and he switched lanes to prepare for the next exit they needed. "I'm not sorry that I told them. I'm not sorry about you, our relationship, or my father's disappointment. The issue is with him, and not me. If my informing him that I'm in a gay relationship means that he'll never speak with me again, so be it."

Levi looked at him full on, staring at him for a second. He nodded slowly. "Fuck him. His loss."

Erwin forced a smile. It was obvious that Levi detected he was speaking from a place of anger, but if being angry with his dad was what it took to make estrangement more bearable, then that was what Erwin would do.

* * *

Levi's hesitation was gone, by the time they pulled up to his mother's house in Ehrmich. Her front door opened as soon as Erwin's car pulled up at the curb, and Levi unbuckled quickly and got out to go and meet her on the lawn.

"Mom," he said, breaking into one of his rare, quiet little smiles as Kuchel came eagerly into his embrace. Today she was wearing a white cotton peasant blouse, a loose ruffled powder-blue skirt to the calves, and a pair of white pumps. By the looks of it, she was still dressed for work. Her long black hair was loose and scented with the jasmine shampoo she'd always favored.

They held each other for a while, and then Levi pulled away to look at her, and she did the same for him. "You look good," he complimented, and it was true. With the same bone structure as Levi, the same hair and eye color and the same youthful countenance, Kuchel might have been mistaken for Levi's sister. The only thing he could say that had changed since he'd last seen her was that her hair was longer.

"So do you." She smiled at him, and she reached out to stroke his hair. "You've always kept your appearance so neat. It's such a relief to see you looking so well, sweetheart."

Levi shrugged, and he glanced over his shoulder at his approaching boyfriend. "Well, you can thank Erwin for some of that. He took me for a haircut before we got on the road, because I refused to show up at your door looking scruffy."

Kuchel, being only an inch or so taller than her son, looked up at the tall blond man who was approaching with a polite smile. "So this is the writer you talked about in your emails?"

"Yeah, Mom. This is Erwin. Uh, by the way..." Levi made a quick, easy decision and he put an arm around the blond's waist as he approached, "...we're dating."

Kuchel looked between the two of them with wide eyes, and for one sinking moment, Levi thought maybe he'd been wrong about how she would react. After all, she'd mentioned before that she'd be happy to have grandchildren. That moment passed swiftly though. Kuchel broke into a sweet, happy smile, similar to Levi's rare ones but far less reserved.

"I had a feeling," she exclaimed. "I knew there was something in the way you wrote about him, but I didn't want to pry. Erwin, I am _extremely_ happy to meet you!"

"Ma'am," said Erwin respectfully. He started to take her hand, but Kuchel hugged him instead.

Levi coughed to cover up the threat of a chuckle over the uncertain look on Erwin's face. He shrugged at the blond as their eyes met, and he mouthed: " _Told you_."

Erwin gingerly hugged Levi's mother back, and his look of confusion changed to one of relief. He smiled at Kuchel as she collected herself and stepped away.

"I'm sorry if that was inappropriate," offered Kuchel. She smiled at Levi with motherly love. "Levi _never_ dates, not since high school. Not that I think anything is wrong with people choosing to be single, but when it's your child...well, a mother can't help but hope."

"I understand."

Levi saw the brief flash of melancholy in Erwin's blue eyes, and he wondered if he was thinking about his own mother. He would have liked to reassure the man; tell him that his father's dickhead behavior wouldn't cause a rift between Erwin and his mom too, but Levi couldn't be certain of that.

"Well, come on inside, gentlemen," Kuchel invited after a moment of silence. "Bring your things. Levi, your old room is ready for you, but I didn't get the chance to tell you that I have someone else staying with me as well."

"Oh yeah?" Levi cocked his head curiously, and he frowned a little at the thought that it might be a new boyfriend. He didn't want his mother to be lonely, but he sure as hell didn't like the thought of some guy boning her, either. "Who?"

"I'll introduce you to her once we're inside. Can I help carry anything?"

"No ma'am, we've got this," Erwin assured her.

He himself had only brought a backpack with a laptop sleeve in it and a suit bag to keep his nicer outfit free of wrinkles, in case they went out to dinner. Levi of course had only his duffle bag. The two men got their things out of Erwin's car, and the writer put the top back down before locking it up and arming the alarm. They followed Kuchel up to the hedge-lined, stone-paved path leading to the front door, and she held the door open for them as they went inside.

Levi stopped so abruptly upon entering the living room that Erwin bumped into him from behind. There, sitting cross-legged on the floor in front of the television, was a gangly and petite youth with dark red hair and freckles. She had her hair gathered into a ponytail, and her bangs hung over a pair of wide, jade green eyes. She appeared to be enraptured with a video game she was playing on the console by the television. She needed no introduction to Levi, and when Erwin saw her, he went still as well.

"Isabel," called Kuchel, "could you please pause your game for a minute? There's someone I want to introduce you to."

The girl grumbled a bit, but she complied. She twisted on the throw pillow she was using as a cushion to look up at them all, and her mouth fell open a little as she gazed up at Levi and Erwin.

"Levi, Erwin, this is Isabel Magnolia," introduced Kuchel. "She'll be staying with me for a while. Isabel, meet my son Levi and his boyfriend Erwin Smith."

For a moment, all Levi could do was stare at her. A range of emotions churned beneath his deceptively impassive countenance.

"Hi," said Isabel, looking them both over with interest. "You look just like your mom, Mister."

Levi shook himself out of his daze. Still keeping his expression a neutral mask, he nodded. "We hear that a lot. Hello, Isabel."

Noticing that Erwin was standing still as a statue, Levi nudged him covertly. The blond came out of his own daze and took his cue.

"Pleasure to meet you, Isabel," Erwin said courteously.

"Hmm." The girl got to her feet, looking at the captain curiously. She was the only one in the room shorter than Levi, and not by much. "Except you don't smile like she does. You look kind of grumpy."

"Isabel," whispered Kuchel.

"I didn't mean it in a bad way!" Isabel spread her hands. "I just mean, well, you're a soldier, right?"

Levi nodded again. "That's right."

"So I reckon it's just normal for you to have that sort of look on your face," Isabel went on with a shrug. "That what I see on TV, anyhow. Military guys aren't s'posed to smile."

"Perhaps not while on duty," Erwin corrected her gently, demonstrating a quiet smile of his own, "but soldiers _can_ and _do_ smile, Isabel. Levi is just more subtle about it than most."

"And he's always been a quiet boy," added Kuchel. She stroked her son's shoulder lovingly. "You must be tired, Levi. Why don't you and Erwin take your things up to your room and rest for a little while? I'll brew us up some tea before dinner. I've got wine-braised brisket cooking in the oven, and we'll have rosemary roasted potatoes and the broccoli and olive salad you love so much as our sides."

"Shit, Mom, you didn't have to go through so much trouble." Levi's mouth was already watering, though. He should have expected her to put together one of his favorite dinners. He'd tried to make her special salad himself once while on tour, and it just didn't come out the same.

Kuchel smiled at him, and she kissed him on the cheek. "It's no trouble, sweetheart. I haven't seen you for months, and if I can't take the time to make my son his favorite meal when he has the chance to visit, I'd be no sort of mother."

Levi gave her a tiny smile back. "Well, you've got to let me clean up afterwards, then. Come on, Erwin; let's go put our stuff away.

* * *

Erwin looked around at the room they'd be sleeping in during their visit. He could easily imagine Levi growing up with this as his bedroom. It was clutter-free, with a cherry wood desk in the corner near the window and a queen-sized brass bed. The bedding was composed of a forest green comforter and white sheets and pillow cases. The glass-top nightstands on either side were also made of brass, and there was an oaken armoire against the wall. Tasteful without being overly fancy, it seemed to suit the captain.

Erwin studied his companion as Levi closed the door behind them and leaned back against it, dropping his bag on the floor with a thump. The brunet tilted his head back and closed his eyes, clearly trying to cope with a range of emotions.

"I wasn't expecting to see Isabel," offered Erwin softly, just as stunned by the surprise encounter.

Levi cracked his eyes open and gazed back at the blond. "I know, right? Much less find out my mom's taken her under her wing. Talk about a huge fucking coincidence."

Erwin smiled at him. He could see the joy lurking behind those hooded gray eyes. He could only imagine what Levi must have felt when he first saw one of his best friends from the previous life. The guilt throbbing in the back of Erwin's mind was sobering, though. Isabel had died largely because of him, regardless of her joining the scouts of her own free will. He approached Levi quietly, and he put his hands on the smaller man's shoulders.

"Are you okay?"

Levi nodded, appearing mildly uncertain. "Yeah, I think so. I damned near lost my composure down there, though."

"You did well to stay in control," complimented Erwin. "I would have tried to do something to distract from it, if you'd started breaking down." He bent over to kiss Levi softly on his slack, parted lips.

"Makes me wonder who else has come back," murmured Levi, putting his arms around the bigger man. "If Isabel's been reborn, then maybe Farlan has been, too."

"Perhaps," agreed Erwin. "It tempts me to start doing some people searching on the internet. I've wondered the same thing about Mike and many of our other fellow scouts, myself."

"Think you could find them if they have?" mused Levi.

Erwin shrugged. "I don't know, but it couldn't hurt to try. Even if I _do_ confirm their existence and find out where they are, I wouldn't know what to do with that information. It isn't as though I can track them down and tell them we knew each other from a past life. I would get locked up in a mental institution for sure, if I tried."

Levi snorted. "No kidding. It took me long enough to believe it myself, and I had most of my memories of that life." He sighed, and he looked off to the side. "I'm pretty sure Isabel's as clueless about it as everyone else. Hanji told me she's had dreams about it, but I haven't tried suggesting to her that they aren't just dreams. As batshit crazy as she is, she'd probably be the only person that would believe us."

Erwin nodded. "Nile and Marie have no memories of the previous life, either. I've never even attempted to talk to them about it, though. Perhaps they've had dreams as well and just brush it off as nothing more than that."

Levi met his eyes again. "Do you think you'll ever run it by them?"

Erwin sighed, and he shook his head. "Much as I'd like to, I'll probably never mention it unless one of them says something first. I value their friendship too much to jeopardize it with what surely would sound like insanity."

"I get that," whispered Levi in agreement. He picked up his bag, and he put it against the wall. He then did the same with Erwin's. Rubbing his hands absently on his pants, Levi took a deep breath. "Well, let's get downstairs. I can't hide up here all night just because I'm feeling a little freaked out."

Erwin smiled sympathetically at him.

* * *

"Isabel, don't talk with your mouth full," admonished Kuchel gently when the girl began asking Erwin and Levi all sorts of questions at the dinner table.

To her credit, the little redhead paid heed to her foster host. She finished chewing her food before asking another question. "So what kind of books do you write, mister?" she asked of Erwin.

"Usually historical documentaries and theorizing," obliged Erwin. "The one that I'm currently working on is more of a romance novel, however."

Isabel's face screwed up. "Think it'll be any good?"

"Oi, kid," Levi muttered, "Erwin's a damned good writer. Don't even suggest otherwise."

Erwin flushed lightly with pleasure at the praise. "I can only hope it will come out as good as I think it will," he confessed, smiling at his lover. "It is, after all, my first attempt at this genre."

"I'm sure it will be wonderful, Erwin," encouraged Kuchel. "How is your meat? It isn't too dry, is it?"

"No ma'am. It's tender and delicious." In testament to the observation, Erwin cut another piece off his brisket. He chuckled at Levi when the captain finished the slice he'd been eating and helped himself to another. "This is the first time I've ever seen you eat with such gusto, Levi."

Levi shrugged, cutting a bite away and stuffing it into his mouth. He was going to end up having to loosen his pants before the end of the meal, he was sure. He chewed and swallowed, before shaking a little pepper on his salad. "I'd probably be a fat ass by now, if I still lived with Mom. She spoils me with her cooking."

"With _your_ metabolism, I doubt it," teased Kuchel with a wink at her son. She addressed Erwin, next. "It was all I could do to put some meat on his bones when he was a child. I think other parents were convinced I hardly fed him, as small and skinny as he was."

"Well, he's filled out nicely," chuckled Erwin. "I can imagine him as a waif in his youth, though."

"Oh, I'll have to get out the family photo album to show you after dinner! I have the most adorable picture of Levi having his first bath as a baby!"

Levi choked on the salad he'd been munching on. "Don't you dare..."

"Please, dare!" Erwin was grinning brightly now at the prospect of seeing what Levi looked like as a baby. "I would really like to see that."

"Me too!" chimed Isabel. "I'll bet he was as much of a sour-puss then as he is now!"

"Hey!" Levi glared at the girl, but it lacked its usual, intimidating bite. "Respect your elders, brat."

Kuchel giggled behind her napkin, and she cleared her throat when the captain raised a brow at her. "Actually, Levi was a very happy little baby. Hard to believe, isn't it?"

"Oh, was he?" Erwin's thick brows went up with surprise. Obviously, his imagination wasn't quite vivid enough for him to picture it.

"Absolutely," insisted Kuchel. "And he was such a loveable, mommy's boy. He used to pick wildflowers for me on his way home from grade school, and when he was a baby, he could amuse himself for hours blowing little spit bubbles—"

"Mom," groaned Levi, "cut it out."

Erwin was laughing softly, watching the embarrassed captain with curious interest. "That sounds adorable, and knowing how loyal he is to his soldiers, I find it entirely believable that he would be such a loving son."

Levi was turning pink from his cheeks to his ears. He'd never experienced this sort of embarrassment before, because he'd never been serious enough with any previous love interests to bring them home to meet his mother. To try and contain the situation before it got any more humiliating, he decided a change of subject was in order.

"Have you talked to Uncle Kenny lately? How's the old fart doing?"

Kuchel blinked at him with mild surprise, and he couldn't blame her. Levi never asked about his uncle. He didn't like the man any more in this life than he had in the last one, though he knew his mother loved Kenny dearly.

"He's doing well," she answered after a moment's thought. Her little smirk said she'd picked up on the true reason behind his inquiry. "Am I embarrassing you that much, baby?"

Levi shrugged, and he cut another bite of brisket. "I'm not used to you going off like this to people. I'd rather talk about that scummy brother of yours than relive embarrassing childhood moments."

"Wow, you're pretty mean," Isabel noted. "You should be nicer to your mom, Levi! She's a real swell lady!"

Kuchel rose to Levi's defense quickly. "That's just Levi's way, pumpkin. Believe me, he's a very good son. He sends me money each month, in fact, though I've repeatedly asked him not to."

"Just trying to help you out when I can," excused Levi, feeling his face heat further as both Erwin and Isabel stared at him. "You're too damned altruistic for your own good, mom. I still remember the last time your electricity got cut off because you gave most of your paycheck to charity instead of looking out for yourself."

Kuchel sighed, and she spread her hands. "You're right; I'm terrible at budgeting myself. Erwin, that reminds me of another amusing thing Levi did as a child—"

"Mom, please stop—"

"He'd saved up every penny of his allowance in a shoe," Kuchel went on as if Levi hadn't spoken. "I had no idea how much he'd saved up until he caught me fretting over bills one day. He went to his room, and he came out with a big wad of cash in his hand! He tugged on my sleeve, held up the money and asked: _'Mommy, will this help?'_ "

Kuchel sniffed suddenly, and her eyes grew moist at the memory. Beside her Isabel had fallen silent, unusually somber with the retelling of how responsible and protective Levi had been of his mother.

"Such a good, sweet boy," Kuchel finished, her voice taking on a husky note. She reached across the table to squeeze Levi's hand. "You were always looking out for me."

Levi averted his gaze, feeling his throat tighten warningly. "Didn't like seeing you cry," he muttered gruffly. "I had nothing to spend it on, anyway."

Erwin gazed at Levi with naked admiration in his blue eyes. His smile showed no surprise over the revelation, and he reached beneath the table to give the smaller man's knee a familiar squeeze of affection. "That's a truly heartwarming story. I can absolutely see you doing something like that."

Isabel watched Levi thoughtfully, and she expressed her thoughts on the matter after a moment's reflection. "I guess you're kind of sweet after all, then."

Levi wanted to sink down into his chair and put a bag over his head. He hated it when people made him out to be some kind of a fucking hero just for doing the right thing. "I wasn't perfect. I used to get into trouble at school. You remember that, don't you Mom?"

"Of course, I do." Kuchel chuckled, and she whispered across the table at Erwin as if sharing a naughty secret with him. "Levi was a little ass-kicker."

Erwin nearly swallowed his wine the wrong way. He coughed, glancing sidelong at his lover—who by now could not be any more embarrassed than he already was. "Do tell."

"He used to get into fights," explained Kuchel with a wicked little grin. "It wasn't entirely his fault, though. People underestimated him due to his size all the time, and my son doesn't suffer bullies well."

"I don't suffer them at all," corrected Levi. He grimaced at his mother. How many times had she been called for a parent/teacher conference because of him? He could think of at least six times he'd sat in the principal's office with his mother, listening sullenly while she discussed his behavior and promised it wouldn't happen again. He'd smashed one jock's nose with a headbutt, nearly drowned another that had a fondness for forcing nerdy kids' heads into the toilet, and beaten a rebel-type half to death with a pair of erasers after the guy blew chalk all over his face.

"Mom, I'm sorry I was such a pain in your ass growing up."

Kuchel laughed outright at that. "Oh, and here you can't stand your uncle. If he were here, he'd be saying: _'Boy, ya did what ya had to do and you took care of your mom'_. He'd be right, too."

Levi started to say something, re-thought it, and dissolved into pouty silence. It didn't help when his mother laughed with amusement at him. Erwin was looking at him like he was a particularly adorable stuffed animal he wanted to squeeze the stuffing out of. Isabel picked up on the blond man's adoring expression, and she giggled.

"You two are so gay for each other," observed the redhead.

* * *

-To be continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> End of chapter recap: 
> 
> Levi: "Don't you leave me again, you asshole!"
> 
> Erwin: ʕ ಡ ﹏ ಡ ʔ "Levi, I'm not going anywhere. You're having a nightmare."
> 
> Levi: "...I wasn't crying."
> 
> Erwin: "Of course, you weren't." *snuggle*
> 
> Levi: *Goes into full panic mode* "Shit, I'm filthy! I look like a caveman! Mom can't see me like this! Shit, shit, shit!"
> 
> Erwin: "Was that white and black blur my Levi? Damn, where did he go? He was just here..."
> 
> Levi: "I need a haircut! I need a shave! I need—"
> 
> Erwin: "You need to calm down."
> 
> Levi: （；＿) "Right. Calm down. Got it. You're right."
> 
> Erwin: "Can I just say you are the cutest little panic monster I've ever seen?"
> 
> Levi: "No, you may not. And I wasn't panicking."
> 
> Erwin: "OMFG I love your mother."


	14. Chapter 13

Levi was surprised when his mother pulled a tactful move after dinner. As they were washing up, Kuchel announced that she was going to take Isabel to the mall to pick out new clothes for school. Levi at first wondered why she would choose now of all times to go shopping, but then she gave him a sly little wink, and she cast a meaningful if subtle glance at Erwin.

"We'll be gone for a couple of hours," explained Kuchel. "I'd invite you boys to go with me, but I know you must be tired. I'll call you when we're on our way home, Levi."

"Okay," he said, catching on. That beautiful, sneaky mother of his. She wasn't just doing this on a whim, it was deliberately to give him and Erwin some time alone together. Levi wasn't planning on having sex with his boyfriend in his mother's house, but if she and Isabel weren't going to be home...

"Make sure you text if I don't answer," he suggested. "I might be in the shower."

"I'll keep that in mind," she replied with a smirk. "Isabel, are you ready to go? Maybe we can stop by the arcade after we get some clothes and shoes."

"You know I'm game!" agreed Isabel happily.

"Wait, Mom," called Levi when the two females started to exit the kitchen.

"Go ahead and get in the car, honey," Kuchel instructed Isabel. When the girl headed out to the garage, Kuchel looked at her son quizzically. "What is it, Levi?"

He dug out his wallet and opened it. He counted out some bills, and he handed them over to his mother.

"Levi—"

"Take it," he insisted. "You don't have a lot of disposable income, and I've got nothing to spend this on. Let me pitch in. Treat yourselves to some icecream or something while you're out."

Kuchel's eyes shone with love, and she kissed him on the cheek. "My good boy. You've taken a shine to Isabel, haven't you?"

Levi noticed Erwin smiling at him from his position at the sink washing dishes. He shrugged, downplaying it like he did most of his feelings. Erwin was the only one that knew about Levi's past connection to Isabel. "She's okay."

"Well, thank you for the donation," Kuchel said, used to his gruffness. "This will make our little 'girl's night out' even better. We'll see you later, guys. Erwin, thank you for helping with the dishes."

"Yes ma'am," responded the writer.

* * *

"Well, that was odd," commented Erwin once he and Levi were alone. He finished placing the last dish in the drying rack, and he wiped his hands off with a tea towel. "I know school is about to start in most districts, but I would have thought your mother would wait until after you left to do clothes shopping for it."

"She's not doing it just to get clothes for Isabel," Levi said, raising a brow at him.

Erwin didn't get it. "She isn't?"

Levi sighed, shook his head and made an amused little sound. "Heh. You must be tired. You're usually more observant about people than this."

Faintly mystified, Erwin considered his lover quietly. "What did I miss?"

"Mom took Isabel out to give us a little alone time," obliged Levi. He closed in on the writer, and he put his arms around Erwin's neck. "I say we take advantage of it while we can, because I'm not comfortable banging you with my mom and a kid sleeping right down the hall."

"Oh." Erwin grinned. He was liking Kuchel more and more. "I concur. Should we take this upstairs?"

"Yeah, come on." Levi grabbed his hand, and Erwin had to chuckle at his eagerness as the smaller man all but dragged him out of the kitchen and to the stairs.

"She did say she'd be gone for a couple of hours," reminded Erwin, stumbling a little on the first step. "We have plenty of time, Levi."

"I'm not after a 'quickie'," excused the captain. "I'm gonna make the most of those two hours and I plan to be well satisfied and bathed by the time they get back."

Erwin had no objection to that.

* * *

Levi wasn't kidding about making the most of the time Kuchel had given them alone together. First he licked and kissed his way up and down Erwin's body until the blond was panting for him, and then he prepared him with lubricant. Erwin was a little surprised that he wanted to be on top, but he didn't complain about it. Levi had him lie on his back with his legs spread, and he positioned himself between his thighs and took him sitting up. The captain certainly knew how to work around their size difference, and it didn't take long for him to have Erwin grabbing at the bedding and red-faced with pleasure. He lasted for a long time too, and Erwin nearly came twice by the time Levi tensed up over him and spilled himself.

Gasping for breath, Levi cleaned them both up with a cloth, and he laid on top of Erwin as they recovered. They kissed lazily, and Levi fondled Erwin's cock until it was fully erect again. He then offered himself to the blond, lying back with a seductive, inviting expression. Erwin took his offer eagerly, and they fucked again with Erwin on top. They didn't try anything kinky, though Erwin did give Levi's ass a couple of smacks while preparing him, just to get him more worked up. He had to muffle Levi's profanities when they got so loud, Erwin worried that the neighbors might hear and say something to Kuchel about it.

Eventually they both ran out of stamina, and they lay there exhausted on the bed together. Erwin kissed his lover lazily, sated and happy. "That was a good call," he said, "putting those towels on the bed."

Levi nodded. He'd come up with the idea when they made it into his bedroom and he realized they were probably going to make a mess. They'd just stripped the towels after having sex the second time, and they were in the hamper.

"I'm gonna wash them tomorrow when I do my laundry." Levi yawned, and he dropped his head back down on Erwin's chest. "Didn't want Mom to get stuck cleaning up our spunky sheets. It's one thing for her to give us a little time alone, but she doesn't need to see the evidence that we made the best of it."

Erwin chuckled. "Yes, I'd rather her not. Shall we have that shower you mentioned earlier?"

"Mmm, sounds like a plan to me."

* * *

Refreshed from the sex and the following shower, Levi was drying his hair when Kuchel and Isabel returned home. He came down the stairs when he heard them come in, draping his towel around his shoulders. Erwin had already crashed, going straight to bed as soon as he dried off and changed into his pajama pants.

"Hey, how did it go?" Levi asked, dressed in an undershirt and a pair of track pants for bed.

"I think we missed out on most of the best sales," Kuchel informed, "but we did pick up a few nice outfits and a new pair of shoes."

"Woof," huffed Isabel as she set down her load of shopping bags on the living room couch. "Clothes are heavier than you'd think! Oh, and thanks, big bro."

Levi blinked at her, shaken by the familiar yet unexpected nickname. "Big bro? And thanks for what?"

Isabel shrugged her petite shoulders. "I've decided to call you 'big bro' because we're kind of family now, right? And Mama Kuchel told me you helped out with the clothes, so I figured I ought to say thanks."

"I see." Levi's chest felt a little tight. He looked to his mother. "You adopting her now, or what?"

"Actually, I think I am," admitted Kuchel with a smile at the teenager. "It's not an easy process, but I have some connections that might help make it easier. Isabel is a good girl, and she deserves a stable home. We talked about it while we were out, and we both want to do it."

Levi really couldn't say he was surprised. His mother got lonely living by herself, and she seemed to get along really well with Isabel. The girl could be a pain in the ass, but she could also be an invaluable helper around the home, and Isabel's personality was the same now as it had been in that other life.

_She couldn't ask for a better mother._

Levi didn't make his observation aloud. "Hope it goes well for you, then. Hey kid, if she's adopting you, make sure you take good care of her, got it? You're one lucky brat."

"I'm not a brat!" Isabel's pout faded, and she grinned at Kuchel. "But I'll take care of her. She's been real swell to me. Nobody messes with Mama Kuchel while I'm around!"

Levi nearly smiled. "See to it. Well Mom, Erwin's already asleep, and I think I'm going to join him."

He hugged her and gave her a kiss, and then he whispered into her ear. "Thanks for that, by the way."

Kuchel smiled, kissed him back and ruffled his hair. "Goodnight, son. I'll see you at breakfast."

* * *

The next day they all went to a local flea market together; which Erwin absolutely loved. Kuchel was evidently a lover of antiques like himself, and Erwin caught a glimpse of Levi rolling his eyes when the two of them discussed an old apothecary table they'd found. Erwin and Kuchel got into a heavy discussion about what year it might have been made and who might have used it. Before long, Levi vanished from sight with Isabel, and Erwin looked around in confusion, wondering where they'd gone.

"I'm sure they aren't far," Kuchel reasoned. "Levi has never had much interest in antiques, unless it's weaponry. Isabel's probably bored half to tears, too."

"Hmm, maybe we'll find them around those booths we saw with the old bayonets," mused Erwin. He felt his phone vibrate in his pocket, and he took it out to look at it. "Excuse me, Mrs. Ackerman. I need to take this call."

"Okay, Erwin. I'll go and look for Levi and Isabel while you do that."

Erwin nodded, and he answered his phone. "Hi Mom. Good to hear from you."

* * *

When Levi saw Erwin again, he could tell instantly that something was very wrong. Kuchel had tracked him and Isabel down, and as the three of them stood in line at a food kiosk to get something to eat, Erwin came walking by. The blond didn't even seem to notice them—or even where he was going. Erwin had a stunned expression on his chiseled features, and he almost ran into a woman in passing. Levi got out of line and went to his lover immediately.

"Oi, Erwin. Stop."

Erwin came to a halt, and he turned to look back at the shorter man. There was devastation in his eyes, and Levi cast a glance around before taking Erwin's hand and leading him out of human traffic. They stopped beneath a big oak tree with gnarled branches, and Levi regarded Erwin with concern he couldn't mask.

"What's with you? Did someone hit you over the head or something?"

"It's my father," said Erwin tonelessly. "I just got word that he's in the hospital."

Levi's eyes widened a little. "What happened to him?"

Erwin closed his eyes, and he rubbed the bridge of his nose between a thumb and forefinger. "Heart attack."

Levi winced inwardly. As unimpressed as he'd been with Erwin's father, he could only imagine how upsetting this news must be for him. Additionally, there was a look that could only be described as guilt growing on Erwin's face.

"This is my fault," stated the writer.

"How is it your fault? For finally coming out of the closet with him?" Levi gripped Erwin's hands in his, and he didn't give a damn what anyone passing by might think. "Don't be an idiot. His inability to cope and accept you for who you are isn't your fault. Does he have a medical history of heart problems?"

Erwin shook his head. "No. This is the first time. Mom says that he's in stable condition, and it was only a minor attack. They should release him tomorrow."

Levi nodded. "Then he should be all right. Are you going to go and see him?" Disappointed though he was at the prospect of losing his last two days to spend with Erwin, this was the man's father. Levi wouldn't hold it against him if he had to go home.

"No, I'm not," answered Erwin with a sigh. "He wouldn't see me if I showed up, anyway. He's still angry, and my presence right now would only make things worse. I could read it in my mother's voice."

"Here, sit down," suggested Levi with a gesture at the exposed roots of the tree they were under. Erwin looked far too pale. The blond did as he suggested, and Levi sat down next to him, keeping one hand on Erwin's shoulder. "What do you need me to do, Erwin? Do you want a drink? Do you just want to go back to the house and lay down for a while?"

Erwin gave him a broken little smile, and he caressed Levi's face with his fingertips. "You see? You're so kind, always thinking of me."

"Well, you're almost as white as I am right now," excused Levi. "I don't want you having a panic attack on me."

"I won't. I'm just so...tired." Erwin rubbed his eyes, and then he dropped his hand into his lap. "That's not all. Mother is considering a divorce."

"Oh, really? Do you think that's what set him off, then?"

Erwin shook his head. "No. She hasn't told him yet. She said she was going to give him one more chance to come to his senses, and after this, she isn't sure she can bring herself to do it even if he doesn't change his act. I'm torn, Levi. I want my mother to be happy, but I don't want them to separate. If he's making her miserable, then she shouldn't stay with him. However, I understand her dilemma. They've been together for nearly forty years, and now he's fragile. It would be hard enough for her to leave him and start over without worrying about how it will effect his health."

Levi's brows furrowed. "Yeah, that sucks. I don't know what to say about that."

"There's nothing to say. This has to be her decision, regardless of how I feel about it." Erwin sighed. "I just hope that she'll find the strength to do what needs to be done in the end, whether its to stick with him and work on the marriage or end things. I felt so useless trying to comfort her over the phone. A part of me thinks that I should return home for her, even if my father won't see me. What do you think I should do?"

Now Levi was just as torn as Erwin. The selfish side of him wanted to say that Mrs. Smith would be just fine, and Erwin should stay with him until it was time for Levi to catch his flight in the morning. That would be too cruel of him though, and he'd seen Erwin Smith suffer enough without adding to it.

"She's your mother," stated Levi simply. "If she needs you, then you should go home to her."

Erwin met his eyes, and the sadness in his blue gaze made Levi's heart ache. "But you've only got one more day. If I go home, I won't get to spend that day with you and see you off."

Levi swallowed. "She's your Mom," he reiterated. "Family comes first. If it were my mother, I know you'd say the same to me."

Erwin sighed again. He gave what passed for a half-smile, and he put an arm around Levi to draw him close. He brushed his lips against the captain's temple, and he spoke softly to him. "And here we are again, sacrificing our time together for others. This seems like an unsettling trend for us."

"It's different, this time around," reminded Levi. "Once I'm released from duty, we can be together without any obstacles. We've just gotta hang in there until then. It's okay, Erwin. We'll email each other, and maybe we can do video calls too. It's not going to be forever."

"You had better keep that promise," murmured Erwin.

* * *

Kuchel was understanding and sympathetic to the situation when they told her Erwin would have to leave that day, cutting his visit short. They returned to her house, and she put some of the leftovers from the night before in a container for him to take home with him.

"So you don't have to worry about cooking tonight," she explained with a smile. "I hope that your father will recover quickly, Erwin. It's been a pleasure spending time with you."

"Thank you," he said sincerely. "You've been a wonderful host. I'm glad I got to meet you."

"Sucks that you have to go so soon," Isabel offered.

Erwin smiled at the girl. "I know. I don't live that far away, though. Maybe someday, you and Mrs. Ackerman can come to Mitras for a weekend and stay with me. You're both welcome to whenever you like. I can sleep on the couch and you ladies can have my bed."

"We'll keep in touch," promised Kuchel. She hugged Erwin tightly, as if he were her own son. "You're always welcome here, too. If you ever want to get away, my door is always open."

Erwin wasn't sure how to respond to that. He and Levi hadn't divulged any details to her concerning his father's reaction to finding out they were dating, but she seemed to have picked up on something. Perhaps it was in the stiff way he spoke of his dad, or maybe he was just imagining that she knew more than she let on. Either way, her words were comforting to him.

"Isabel, let's go inside," Kuchel suggested as she stepped away from Erwin. "Help me decide what to make for dinner tonight, won't you?"

The girl evidently caught on that she was hinting that they should leave Erwin and Levi alone so they could say their goodbyes to each other. She went with the older woman without an argument, waving goodbye to Erwin as they went into the house together. Once they were alone, Erwin turned to Levi with a conflicted expression on his face.

"I wish that I didn't have to make this choice," he murmured. "Leave it to my father to interfere with my plans without even trying."

"He's got a talent," agreed Levi. He sighed. "Don't beat yourself up, all right? You're doing what any good son should do for his mom. I understand, and I think you're doing the right thing."

"The right thing by her, maybe. Not by us, though." Erwin stroked Levi's hair, and he then pulled him into an embrace. It didn't matter to him that they were out on the street in broad daylight. He cupped Levi's chin to tilt his head back, and he gazed into his eyes. "When you come back again, I want to make up for this. I'll come to help you with moving arrangements if you still intend to go through with your plans, and we can take your mother out for a nice dinner."

"I'd like that," answered Levi. He bit his lip, and he gave Erwin a squeeze. "Be careful on the road. Especially when you get into Mitras, because I've noticed people drive particularly stupid on the highway there."

"I'll be careful," promised Erwin with a smile. He sobered, and he lowered his mouth to Levi's. He paused just before their lips touched. "Call me tonight after dinner, will you?"

"Sure."

Levi cupped the back of his head, drawing him down the remaining, small distance to kiss him deeply. They stayed lip-locked for several minutes, until Erwin's phone alarm went off as a reminder that he needed to be getting on the road. With a sigh, the blond pulled away from his companion. "I'd better get going, if I want to make it home before sunset."

Levi nodded, and he stepped back. "I'll talk to you tonight. Good luck with your dad, Erwin."

"Thank you. I've a feeling I'm going to need it."

* * *

Levi watched until Erwin's car drove out of sight, turning down a street to the left. He bowed his head, and he told himself that he'd made the right call encouraging his lover to go home and be with his mother. That was a cold comfort to him, though. He'd said they wouldn't be separated again forever, but what the hell did he know? Shit happened. That kiss he'd shared at the curb with Erwin could be the last one they ever had. He supposed he should be grateful that they'd at least gotten the _chance_ to kiss in this life, the chance to be together in ways they'd never gotten to be together in the past.

And what a few days those were, too. Levi had experienced more raw passion in that small amount of time with Erwin than he'd experienced in a whole year. The man evoked so much emotion in him, and so much trust. Levi would hold those memories close to his heart in the days to come, and he would find strength in them whenever things seemed hopeless.

"Levi?"

He turned to see his mother coming up behind him. He'd been standing out there for several minutes after Erwin left, and Kuchel was obviously concerned for him. "I'm okay, Mom."

She sighed, and she put her hands on his shoulders. "It's all right if you're not, you know. You're crazy about him, and he is for you. I could see it every time you looked at each other."

Levi had to bottle his emotions. He couldn't do this right now. He still had the day to spend with his mother and Isabel, and he wasn't going to spend it moping about Erwin. It dawned on him then that he hadn't packed any of his new clothes with Erwin's things, as planned. Levi groaned.

"What is it?" asked Kuchel.

"My clothes," explained Levi. "I was gonna send the clothes I bought for this trip home with Erwin, because I didn't want to bring them with me when I deploy and risk anything happening to them. Uh, might as well tell you, when I finish this tour, I'm probably going to transfer to the base at Mitras. Erwin and I want to see how we'd do living together. I'm not saying I'm going to just move right in with him, but if I'm in the same city, I can stay weekends with him for a start and see how it goes."

Kuchel smiled in understanding. "You're testing the waters. That's smart, but I have a feeling you two will be just fine. Levi, don't worry about the clothes. Just leave them folded on your bed tomorrow and when I get home from the airport, I'll box them up and send them to Erwin. There can't be that much to pack."

"No, just some pajamas, a couple of pants and a few shirts. We just thought it would be good for me to have clothes already there at his place, and I might touch down there before I come here. So you're not upset that I'm not planning to stay here in Ehrmich when I'm relieved?"

"No." She cupped his face and gazed into his eyes. "I want you to be happy. You deserve that, after fighting so hard. Besides, Mitras isn't that long a drive. Let's make a pact to try and come visit each other whenever time allows. We also have the holidays, and I call dibs on the first Christmas you're back."

Levi managed a teeny smile. "You got it, Mom."

* * *

As agreed, Erwin called Levi that evening after dinner. They talked on the phone for more than an hour, telling each other how their day went and discussing plans for the future.

"I took Mom and Isabel out to eat," Levi informed him, "and I wore that formal outfit and the cravat you gave me. Mom said I looked 'dashing' in it."

Erwin smiled. "Did you get a picture, I hope?"

"Yeah, mom took one on both our phone cameras. I'll email it to you before bed. I'm pissed off though, because I was gonna consolidate all the new clothes I bought in with your luggage for you to take home, but I forgot."

"Me too," sighed Erwin. "It was rather rushed, though."

"Well, you'll still be getting them. I'm washing them all tonight, and Mom's going to box them up and send them surface mail to you, so they'll be there at your place when I come back, just like we planned."

"That's generous of her," observed Erwin. "Does she know what we're planning? Is she all right with it?"

"Yeah, we talked about it a little after you left, and she's fine. I think having Isabel around makes it a little easier on her. She did make me promise that I'll spend my first Christmas back home at her place, though, so you're part of that deal."

Erwin chuckled. "Given how dysfunctional my family is right now, I see no issue with that. I think attempting to have Christmas with my parents would be a bit of a nightmare, even if my mother could convince my father to go for it."

"Tch. I can just imagine her having to chase your old man down because he'll keep storming out. Yeah, best to give them some time. Maybe we could do a little thing with just your mom, the day before or after. You know, keep it on the downside so your dad doesn't flip out."

"Maybe. Thank you for considering her, Levi."

"So how is she doing?" asked the captain. "Is your dad doing okay?"

"He's tired, but he's recovering," answered Erwin. "Mom is holding up like a trooper. She's coming over in a little while to stay the night with me, and she'll pick Dad up from the hospital when they release him in the morning. She wanted me to extend her apologies to you again about the way my father acted, by the way."

"Wasn't her fault," muttered Levi. "She was trying to be understanding, so she's all right by me."

"I'm glad that at least one of them showed you some redeeming qualities." Erwin rubbed his thumb over the stone set into the bolo tie Levi had given to him. He'd been keeping it on him or wearing it ever since the drive home. "I miss you already."

"You too," came Levi's soft answer. "Hey Erwin, I want you to send me a picture of you all dressed up wearing that bolo tie, too. Then we've both got one of each other."

"I can do that."

"But I also want you to send me a selfie tonight," Levi went on. "And I want you to be in nothing but that bolo tie."

Erwin's brows went up. "Oh? That sounds a bit risqué, love. What if your superiors check your phone and find it?"

"That's why you keep it from the waist up," reasoned Levi. "I can let my imagination handle the rest. They're not gonna say shit about me having a picture of a shirtless guy on my phone. Doesn't count as porn."

"Excellent reasoning. I'll do it. Will you do the same for me?"

"Yeah, I can swing that. Want me to wear the cravat?"

Erwin could just picture it, and he made a low sound of desire in his throat. "Yes, please. The cravat, and nothing else. I would like more than the torso in it, though. I don't have any concerns about superiors seeing it."

"Lucky." Levi snorted. "All right. I'll do a sex pose for you and try to zoom out enough to get the junk in the picture, too."

"That would be fantastic," enthused Erwin. He had no doubt that Levi would not disappoint. "If you haven't finished your tour by the time my book is published, I'll find a way to get a copy shipped to you. I really want you to read it and tell me what you think."

"I'd like to read it too," assured Levi. "I'm sure Hanji will want to get her hands on a copy of it also. I wonder if it might jolt some more memories for her if she does read it, though."

"Perhaps. In truth, I'm writing this book for us. Levi, would you do something for me?"

"What's that?"

Erwin hesitated. They'd already discussed this subject before, and he got the feeling that Levi had reservations about it. "If you should happen to recall what was found in the basement, please let me know. Give me as many details as you can. It would be nice to include the origins of the titans in this book, but it isn't necessary to the main plot."

Levi sighed. "And you want to know as bad now as you did back then, I take it."

"I'm afraid so," admitted Erwin. "It's a mystery that I gave my life to reveal, and I never, as far as I an recall, got to see the end result. It would give me a great deal of closure if my questions could finally be answered. I'm sorry if this puts a burden on you."

"No, it's fine. I understand." Levi muttered a curse under his breath. "Sucks that I don't have anything more to give you, right now. I know how important it was to you, and every time I think of you dying right when we were almost to our goal, I..."

"Levi," soothed Erwin when he heard the tightness of emotion in the other man's voice, "It's all right. You did everything I asked of you and more, and death was always at our heels. I just want you to inform me if you have any further dreams or visions of what happened after my death."

"I'll try," said Levi. "I can't promise anything because I haven't had any new dreams about that life for a while now, but I'll make sure to document any if I do, okay?"

"That's all I can ask of you. Thank you, Levi."

* * *

True to his word, Levi sent the photo of himself dressed up, and then later that night, he sent a _very_ sexy picture of himself. In fact, Erwin's mind went blank when he received it and opened it up. The message attached was: _"I was looking at the picture you sent me and thinking of you when I took this one."_

This was beyond what Erwin expected. Levi was lying naked on his bed in nothing but the cravat as agreed. His pale thighs were spread to expose his goods, his body sparkled with perspiration, he had one arm bent and pillowing his head, and his free hand was gripping his glistening cock. He'd apparently just blown his load after pleasuring himself, and gobs of his spunk peppered his chest and stomach. His lazy gray eyes were inviting, gazing back at the camera with a promise in them. It was so sinfully erotic a picture that Erwin at first didn't realize one certain detail that made no sense.

"Wait a minute..." Erwin frowned, confused. If both of Levi's hands were occupied in the picture, then who took the photo? Surely Levi's mother wasn't _that_ supportive of them, and Erwin couldn't imagine the captain having Isabel snap a picture of him like that.

He couldn't fathom the idea of Levi inviting one of his friends to come into his room, watch him jack off and then snap a picture of him, but what other explanation could there be? _Someone_ had to have taken it.

Shaking his head, Erwin closed out the picture, and he dialed Levi's number on the phone. He felt a little bad when he heard the sleepy note in Levi's voice as he answered it, realizing he must have called just as his lover fell asleep.

"Sorry to wake you up," Erwin said, "but I had to call you after seeing the picture you sent me."

"Mmm, it's okay." Levi's voice sounded sensual, as if he were still basking in the afterglow. "Did you like it, or what?"

"I did," assured Erwin, "It's breathtaking. Something troubles me about it, though."

"Yeah? Is it the cum? I went too far, didn't I? I made it nasty for you."

"No, no, I have no problem with that at all," Erwin hastily explained, flushing at the mental image that popped up in his head. "It's...well, I don't know how to say this..."

"Just spit it out." Levi was starting to sound annoyed and a little hurt, obviously getting the impression that Erwin was displeased with the picture.

"All right; who was holding the fucking camera?" Erwin finally blurted. He was surprised by the jealousy in his own voice and his use of profanity, and he calmed himself. "I didn't mean to say it like that..."

"Oh, is that it? Heh, you idiot. You actually thought I had someone else take that for me?"

Now Erwin was blushing to the roots of his hair. He'd known there had to be a simple explanation for it, but his passions got in the way of his logic. "I didn't know what to think. I couldn't imagine you doing that, but both of your hands are free in the picture."

Levi sighed. "Ah, chief...I didn't know you could be so possessive. I like it."

"Erwin shut his eyes. "Well, now you know, and I think we're even, on that account. How did you manage it?"

"Guess I'd better tell you before you break your brain trying to figure it out." Levi's voice was spiked with subtle amusement. "I MacGyvered it. Mom has one of those creep model hands for art reference...the kind with the bendable fingers. Know what I'm talking about?"

"Yes, I'm familiar." Erwin frowned, wondering just what Levi had gotten up to with the artificial hand. He was starting to figure it out though, and he started to grin in spite of himself.

"I set up a tripod on the bed, stuck the hand to it, put my phone in it and got it focused and ready," Levi went on. "Then I stared at your picture on the tablet I borrowed from Isabel—"

"Wait, you put a shirtless picture of me on a minor's tablet?" Erwin's eyes widened with horror.

"No, dipshit. I shared the pic you sent of yourself dressed up, and she had that one on her tablet. So anyway, I looked at that while I rubbed off, and as soon as I came, I sat up, set a five second timer on my camera app, got in position and took two pictures. The first one came out kind of blurry, but the second one was all right."

Erwin was frankly amazed over Levi's inventiveness. "I'm impressed. It sounds like something Hanji would rig up."

"Yeah, she's a bad influence. Heh." Levi sighed in a contented manner. "Feel better now? Don't worry, the shirtless pic is just for me. I'm not sharing that with anyone."

Erwin smiled, his face cooling as his concern faded. "You really went through a lot of trouble to send me the most erotic photo possible. I'm flattered, Levi, and I'll enjoy looking at this each night."

"You're gonna wank off to it, right?"

Erwin's blush returned. "Of course."

"Good. Maybe you can do that with me on the phone sometime."

The suggestion sparked arousal within Erwin, but his mother was sleeping in his bedroom, and the last thing he wanted to do was have her come out for a glass of water or something and find him jerking off on the couch. "We can definitely try to schedule that. I'd do it now, but—"

"But Mama Smith's there," finished Levi for him. He yawned. "Yeah, I know. It's okay, I just wanted to toss the suggestion out there for later. Phone sex is all we're gonna have for a while, and that's depending on when I can get the reception and time to call you."

The reminder made Erwin a little sad again. "Then we'll have to be sure and make the most of it, when we have those moments. Goodnight, Levi. I love you."

It surprised and warmed Erwin to hear the other man answer back so quickly, without hesitation. "Love you too, blondie."

* * *

-To be continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> End of chapter recap:
> 
> Levi: "What's with your obsession with old shit?"
> 
> Isabel: *yawn* "I'm so bored!"
> 
> Levi: "Let's leave them to it and go check out some weapons."
> 
> Erwin: "I think this apothecary table was probably...hey, where did my bae go?"
> 
> Levi: "Shit. Now you've got to leave. It's like the universe is conspiring against us. Hey, don't cry!"
> 
> Erwin: (;﹏;)
> 
> Levi: "I'll be coming back, you big dork. Hey, let's send naked pics to each other. That ought to cheer you up."
> 
> Erwin: "Wow, this is a really hot picture of Levi..." ( ͡°Ĺ̯̿̿ ͡°) "Wait a minute...who the hell took it?"
> 
> Levi: "Relax. I just pulled a Hanji and rigged something so my hands could be free. Jealous, much?"


	15. Chapter 14

The day of Levi's departure back to Maria arrived all too quickly. He picked up an interactive stuffed bird as a gift for Isabel that he saw in an airport gift shop, and he gave it to her in a bag before heading to his gate.

"I know you like birds, but you don't like them caged," explained Levi when the teenager opened up the bag and stared at the gift. It was a colorful parakeet perched on a swing that could be hung from the ceiling. "He talks," finished Levi, uncomfortable as always with demonstrating affection.

Isabel looked up at him with shining eyes, and she smiled. She threw her arms around him in a hug, and the bird bumped against his back. "He's so cute! Thanks, big bro! I'll take good care of him."

Levi ruffled her hair and grunted. "Just don't leave him turned on all night when Mom's trying to sleep, all right?"

Isabel pulled away and nodded. Kuchel closed in for a lingering, tight embrace with her son. "I know you'll come back safely when this is over," she said with confidence, though her voice was tight with emotion. "My brave, good boy."

Levi flushed a little, but he didn't remonstrate his mother for her loving, dramatic words. He heard the announcement that his flight was boarding, and he reluctantly pulled away from her. "When my service tour is up, I'll come home for a month and spend time with you guys. Maybe Erwin can come stay for a couple of weeks, and then I'll probably relocate to Mitras and see how things go from there. We'll keep in touch, and I'll send you money when I can."

"Levi, you don't have to keep doing that," Kuchel murmured, embarrassed. "I can get by."

"I only send what I can spare," he assured her. "Just so you can get yourself something nice once in a while, okay? Take care, Ma."

Levi reluctantly pulled away from his mother, picked up his bag and went to board his plane. "Here we go again," he muttered under his breath. At least now he had Hanji in his squad.

* * *

Erwin busied himself on his book after returning home, and when he wasn't writing that, he was writing articles for magazines and online media sources. He did write one article about his experiences in Maria, without putting in too many personal details. He still felt it was important for people to hear a more neutral perspective of the conflict, even if it hadn't gone as he'd planned and he didn't get enough material for a full book.

He'd tried visiting his father at the hospital once when he got back to town, but the man was still under the influence of medication, and he didn't want to see Erwin. Unsurprised yet nonetheless disappointed, Erwin hadn't pushed the issue. His mother had dinner with him one night before his father was released, and they talked about Levi and Erwin's experience in Maria. While she did question at first whether Erwin's feelings were genuine or based on the bond he'd formed with Levi while in danger, she had no further doubt once he explained his plans to her. He told her that he loved Levi, and he wanted to live with him some day when the captain returned home, maybe even get married, eventually.

When Erwin wasn't writing or spending what time he could with his mother, he was spending it with Nile and Marie. They were diligent in getting him out of the house as much as possible so that he didn't just sit in the dark moping. Levi sent Erwin emails about twice a week, sometimes three times. He also sent him pictures he took with his phone of his surroundings, his comrades and himself. One in particular Erwin loved; someone had taken a picture of Levi for him, and he was standing at the edge of a cliff, watching the sunrise. It had been taken from behind, and Erwin presumed it must have been Hanji's doing.

The nights were pretty lonely. Now that he'd finally had the experience of sleeping with Levi, it was hard for Erwin to get to sleep without him. He chastised himself for being so dependent on his small, volatile lover, but it only served as proof that he was truly in love with him. Erwin relieved his frustration nightly, getting himself off while thinking of Levi, thinking of the way the captain's face looked when they were having sex. The part of his lips, the intensity of his pale gaze, the flush in his cheeks, that little line that appeared between Levi's dark brows when he was concentrating or getting close to orgasm. It wasn't enough for Erwin, but it would have to do until they were together again.

* * *

Levi was having much the same problems as Erwin. He finally managed to get set up for a video call, and he sat down at the desk in his tent as he started up the application on his phone to make it. He could hear the activity going on outside in their current base camp; soldiers making preparations to move locations in the morning. Tomorrow, they would have another hard day's travel through the mountain ranges. They were due to pass through a small mountain village before coming down on the other side of the range, and from there, they were to assist rebel groups in defending Shiganshina from enemy forces that had tried several times already to take over there.

He couldn't think of that right now, though. He had a "date" with his boyfriend, and Levi was eager to see Erwin's face looking at him, even if it was on a small screen and he couldn't touch it.

"Here goes." Levi selected Erwin's number on the contact list under the video call application, and he waited for him to pick up. For a minute, he thought he'd gotten his time wrong and Erwin wasn't available, but then the screen flickered, and that deep, familiar voice answered just as Erwin's face came into view.

"Levi?"

The captain nearly smirked. "I'll be damned, it worked. You're flickering a little, but it worked."

It took a few seconds for Erwin to respond, probably due to a delay because of their distance. Erwin smiled handsomely at him, his blue eyes flicking over Levi's face as though he couldn't get enough of the sight of him.

"You need a shave," observed the blond.

Levi scratched the stubble lining his chin and jaw. "Is that the best greeting you can give me, asshole? I don't always have the luxury of time to do that. I'm lucky to get a shower, most days."

"I didn't say you look bad," corrected Erwin with a chuckle. "In fact, you're rather cute when you're scruffy."

Levi shrugged it off, though his heart skipped a beat at the compliment. "So how's it going over there for you? Book coming along okay?"

"It's going well," assured Erwin. "Maybe I'll have it completed and published before you return. If so, I'll see what I can do about mailing you a copy, if you're still interested."

"Yeah, I'm interested. How are things with your old man?"

Erwin sighed. "He's recovering, and he's returning to work next week. We still aren't on speaking terms."

"I see." Levi frowned a little. There was nothing to be done for it, though. At least Erwin was still talking to his mom and she was apparently working on getting his dad to see reason. "Maybe by the end of the year, he'll gain a little sense and see what a pig he's being. Just don't let it get you down."

"I won't. Nothing can bring me too far down, as long as I know I have you and you're safe."

Levi rolled his eyes a little. "There you go with the romantic drivel again. Sometimes I think you—"

"Sir, we've got incoming!"

One of Levi's men came charging into his tent, yelling the warning at the top of his lungs. "Missiles heading this way! Radar is picking up incoming aircraft, too! We've got to—"

An explosion went off somewhere, and the walls of Levi's tent billowed from the concussive blast. There was no time to explain anything to Erwin. Levi started to tell the writer that he had to go and would send news to him later, but the screen had gone black. He'd lost the connection.

"Shit." Levi stowed his phone, put on his headset and readied his gear. People were shouting orders and engines started roaring to life from combat vehicles. War equipment rattled as soldiers moved them into place, forming barricades and readying ground-to-air explosives. Hopefully their scanning system had picked up on the approaching threat fast enough for the platoon to get to cover before the air strike got there. The missiles were probably fired first to lead the attack and scatter them.

* * *

"Levi?" Erwin's eyes were wide and his body was tense. He sat up straighter in his outdoor lounger, holding the phone tightly to his ear. "Levi! What's happening?"

Whatever it was, Levi evidently couldn't answer him. The connection was lost. Erwin had heard yelling in the background, along with an ominous whistling sound. He tried to call Levi back again, unable to get that brief image of Levi's eyes widening in his face out of his head. There was no response. Swearing, Erwin tried for Hanji's contact number. He didn't get a response from her either, but if she was still in Levi's platoon, that meant whatever was happening with the captain was also happening with her.

Erwin gave upon trying to contact them, and he tapped the space bar on the laptop he had sitting out on the side table next to him. He immediately started searching the internet for possible news coming from Levi's area of deployment, though it was probably far too soon for any media coverage on the situation. Still, it was his only chance of finding out if the disturbance that had interrupted their call was as serious as it sounded. He kept refreshing the search engine, and as he did that, he called Nile.

"Nile, I need you to check something for me. I was talking long distance to someone deployed overseas in the combat zone, and we lost our connection. I think his encampment might have come under attack. Can you search the latest stories coming in from that area and see if anything comes up from south of Shiganshina? You have more immediate access to them at the station than I do through regular search engines."

"You must be talking about Levi," guessed Nile, having heard by now about the soldier Erwin had developed such an interest in. "Hold on, I'll see if I can pull something up. You're lucky you caught me; I was just about to clock out for the day."

Erwin waited impatiently as his friend went through the database looking for any mention of a recent military clashes around Levi's area. After a while, he sighed. "No, Erwin. Nothing is coming up right now. Maybe you should just try reaching him again in a little while. It could just be that the signal got broken up."

"I heard men shouting, and I think I also heard a missile go off," informed the blond. "Someone also yelled 'incoming' in the background, so I don't think it was a case of target practice or accidental ignition of one of their own."

"When did this happen?" pressed Nile.

"Just moments ago. Less than ten minutes."

"Then word won't get out about it this soon. We might not get news of it at all, depending on the circumstances. I'll have my assistant keep an eye out and inform you if anything comes through. In the meantime, all that you can do is keep trying to contact him and watch the news yourself. I'm sure your...friend...will get back in touch with you as soon as he can, if he isn't caught up in a firefight."

Erwin closed his eyes. He didn't find Nile's words particularly comforting, but the man was only speaking the truth. If it was an attack from enemy Marian forces, then it would probably make it to the news. The media wasn't stingy about it when it came to reporting hostilities committed against Sinarians. It was when civilian casualties happened due to Sinarian actions that things got hush-hush. They didn't want to make their own government look bad to the people at home.

"All right. Thank you for whatever help you can give me, Nile. I'm going to go inside and turn on the world news channel."

"You should come to our place for dinner tonight," suggested Nile. "Be around friends. We can still keep an eye on the news, and Levi can just as easily call your phone over at our house as he can over at yours."

While Erwin wasn't particularly in a social mood right now, especially with his lover in possible mortal danger, neither did he really want to be alone. If something did happen to Levi, however, he would have to excuse himself and take his leave. Erwin didn't know what he would do if he'd been reunited with the man after all this time, just to have him taken away from him so quickly.

"All right, Nile. Would seven o'clock be okay? That will give me the chance to clean up."

"Seven would be fine. I'll tell Marie. I'm sure she'll be happy to have you over."

* * *

They finally got some news just as Marie and Nile were setting the table. Nile's cell phone rang, and he took the call in the other room while Erwin helped Marie finish setting up for dinner. When Nile came back into the dining room, he gave Erwin a quietly sympathetic look, having gotten off the phone.

"That was Casey. He had some news about Captain Ackerman's squad for me."

Erwin froze with a fork and a knife hovering over the place he'd been about to put them. "And?"

"There was an air strike on that unit's encampment. They were getting ready to deploy to Shiganshina in the morning. It was night time over there when it happened. It was a sneak attack, and while there's video media leaked out that shows return fire coming from the ground, they didn't get the chance to launch any jets or choppers to fight back from the air. It's going to be on the eight o'clock news tonight. Maybe by then they'll have a report from one of our military commanders over there with any casualty confirmations."

A little surge of nausea swept through Erwin. He set the eating utensils down—backwards—and then took up the glass of ice water that Marie had placed next to his wine glass at his seat. He drank a few swallows of it, nodded, and then plastered a falsely stoic look on his face. He was getting better at deploying the mask he'd used so often in his previous life, perhaps because so many memories had returned to him from that time. "I see. Then all we can do is wait. I'll pour the wine."

* * *

Dinner was a quiet affair. The air was thick with silence and tension, though Marie gracefully tried to lighten the atmosphere by talking about the latest festival expected to come into town. She tactfully avoided praising Erwin on his recent article concerning his brief experience in Maria. Erwin was thankful for that. Normally, she would discuss his writings with him and tell him her thoughts on them, both constructive critique and praise. He somehow managed to eat everything on his plate, though his appetite tanked the moment Nile got word that there had indeed been an attack on Levi's camp. He even got down a small slice of apple pie for dessert, and by then, the eight o'clock hour was approaching and they all went into the living room to watch the news.

Marie stood supportively by Erwin's chair as he leaned forward in it and stared at the television. For once, Nile didn't seem bothered by his wife's attention on their friend. He sipped his beer and sat on the sofa nearby, saying nothing as they waited for the weather broadcast to finish and the world news to come on.

_"And recently concerning news of the war, there's been a violent attack on a Scout Brigade encampment up in Northern Maria. Under the command of Captain Levi Ackerman, Reconnaissance Squad 16 was stationed in the mountains, en route to provide war relief to the town of Shiganshina. However, in a cowardly ambush, occupational forces from South Maria unleashed an air strike on the Sinarian soldiers in the dead of the night. Footage of the event was leaked by an anonymous source, and we're about to show that to you now."_

Erwin barely felt Marie's hand squeezing his shoulder as the picture changed to a video obviously taken by phone camera. It was confusing to watch due to the darkness, but the smoke-trailing balls of light, shooting streaks and explosions said enough about the situation. The ground appeared ablaze, and Erwin saw blurred, tiny human figures running around on the ground. Lights flashed from helicopters overhead, and the noise of passing fighter jets overhead almost drowned out the whistles and booms from the explosive shells.

"Good God," breathed Nile, eyes widening. "This isn't a fight; it's a slaughter."

Erwin had to agree with him. It was likely that most of the scouts' missile launchers had gotten blown up in the first pass, probably a lot of their vehicles, as well. They looked like they were putting up a good struggle nonetheless, but within moments, the return fire from the ground faded away, the enemy helicopters began to descend, and the footage ended.

The man and woman broadcasting on the screen began to discuss the footage solemnly with each other as the image of the video froze in the background behind them.

_"Now, this footage was sent with a message for our government," stated the male anchorman. "It said: 'The more that your country interferes with us, the more your people will die. Get out of Maria'. Susan, this is obviously a deliberately conducted attack done as much to make a point as to oppose occupational Sinarian forces, wouldn't you say?"_

_"I agree, Alex. This was a terrorist tactic, through and through. We've been seeing more and more of this as this conflict goes on, and it's tragic to think of how many good men and women we've lost in this struggle. I've just been sent the list of confirmed mortalities, and I'll read them for viewers now."_

Erwin sat forward even more, and he took a swallow of the scotch Nile had poured for him. He didn't even notice the burn as it went down. He listened intently as the woman on the television read off the list of known military casualties. Some of the names he recognized from the last time he was there, but many of them had probably been transferred to Levi's squad after Erwin left the country. Thank goodness, Levi, Hanji and Moblit's names weren't amongst those confirmed dead. Erwin breathed a sigh, bowed his head and rubbed the bridge of his nose.

"He's still alive, Erwin," soothed Marie, patting his shoulder.

"Yes, but for how long?"

Erwin lifted his head to stare at the television with narrowed eyes. The male broadcaster had just said those un-accounted for were presumed captured or missing in action. If Levi was counted amongst the former, then he would likely end up publicly executed. It depended on the attitude and motivation of the tacticians behind this strike. If it was the latter, then Levi would be stuck in the same situation he and Erwin had been in. Little to no supplies, no shelter, no transport. How long could he survive in those mountains like that? He wasn't likely to be as fortunate as the last time and have an ally show up with a stolen tank to give him a lift.

"From everything you've told us about the captain, he's a very resourceful man," reminded Marie, "and he may have made it out of there with some way to contact help. You said they use radio and satellite transmissions, and Levi has a phone."

That logic was at least a little heartening to Erwin. Yes, unless it was busted, Levi probably did have some form of communication equipment on him that he could use when he was in the clear. That was assuming he hadn't been captured, of course. Remembering how hard the captain had taken it when he'd had to leave men behind the last time, Erwin doubted he would have fled in this instance. The only reason he'd done it before was for Erwin's sake.

_Just please be alive, not buried under rubble where your body can't be found._

If Levi made it through this alive, then there was at least some chance he could be rescued. Erwin had to stack his hopes on that, because the thought of the alternative was too much for him to take.

* * *

"I can't see us getting out of this so easily, this time," Hanji muttered as she marched alongside her captain, hands cuffed behind her back like Levi's. Moblit got injured in the conflict, and he'd been loaded onto a transport hummer with other badly injured soldiers considered valuable enough to treat. Ironically, they seemed to be heading in the very direction the platoon was meant to go in the first place. Hanji suspected their captors had come directly from Shiganshina, perhaps having managed to sneak scouting parties out without detection and get word back to them that Sinarian recon soldiers were on their way.

Levi grunted, neither agreeing or disagreeing with her observation. He had dried blood smearing his face, but it wasn't his own. He'd attacked like a demon with his knives when he ran out of ammunition, and it was frankly a miracle that the hostiles hadn't shot him dead. Observing the looks some of the men that Hanji suspected to be officers shot Levi's way, it was possible they'd had specific orders not to kill him. Maybe they intended to make an example of him over a broadcast, or maybe their plans for him included torture and interrogation to get intel on Sinarian forces. Neither possibility sat well with Hanji.

Not many of them had made it. A few probably got away on foot before the noose closed in on them. Some injured scouts were forced to walk on foot. Others, much to Hanji's horror, had been put down when it was decided they would require serious medical treatment to go on. Officers, medics, technicians and those deemed able-bodied enough to do physical labor were spared.

Marched at gunpoint until some of them were so exhausted they fell in the snow, the survivors of Recon 16 were more or less herded to the next village. They were allowed meager rations and blankets, and Hanji was granted permission to treat the injured. Levi got separated from his men, thrown in a cage that might have once been intended for a captured animal. The other two surviving officers of lower rank were also caged up, and Hanji wasn't given the chance to try and speak with Levi again during the rest of their stay in the location.

She was allowed to see to Moblit though, and she was unusually somber as she cleaned the burns on his left arm and applied salve to them.

"Where's...the captain?" Moblit asked through teeth gritted in pain.

"He's alive," Hanji assured him. "They've put him and the other strategic officers in cages. I suppose they haven't done the same for me because I'm a doctor."

"W-we've got to...find help," gasped Moblit. "Have to get away."

"Shh, don't try to talk much, right now," advised Hanji softly. She stroked his matted, dark blond hair. "You took a serious burn when that explosion threw you. You're lucky to be alive."

"You know they're...going to execute him," Moblit persisted. "Probably us too, once they...get their use out of us."

Hanji lowered her gaze. "Maybe. These fellows are more organized than the scattered groups we've come across before, though. I feel like they're part of a more elite military branch, and if that's the case, they may have another purpose for us. They knew exactly what they were doing when they struck. They aimed for supply crates, vehicles and weapon launchers. That tells me that their goal was to cripple and capture us all along."

"Prisoner exchanges haven't happened in a while between...our forces and theirs," Moblit pointed out. "I hope you're right, but I think if we can't get out of this, it's going to be...the end of the road."

"Moblit, just stay calm and concentrate on getting better," Hanji said to him sternly. She wrapped his injured arm carefully in bandaging, and she looked through her kit for a morphine syrette. Upon finding one, she applied it to help Moblit with the pain, and she gave his uninjured hand a squeeze. "I have to look after other wounded, but I'll come back to you after I've made my rounds. Just rest, and don't get yourself worked into a state predicting things that haven't happened yet, okay?"

"Yes Ma'am," he sighed, squeezing her hand back. "I'll try not to panic."

"Good."

Hanji let go of him, and she got up to have a look at the other injured soldiers. Some of them were members of the opposition, but she treated them no differently than her own comrades. The ones with the most severe wounds got treated first, regardless of whether they wore Marian or Sinarian uniforms.

Once she finished seeing to everyone and giving Moblit some water, she went to the man evidently in charge of overseeing the prisoners. Hanji spoke to him in his native language, though he'd demonstrated that he knew some Sinarian. She reported everyone's condition, her recommendations for further treatment and what medication she distributed. The man that had watched Hanji work from a distance while she was caring for people nodded in confirmation when the Marian general glanced at him questioningly.

"It's as she says, sir," reported the soldier.

"Good. Walk with me, Doctor."

Hanji didn't really feel like taking a walk, but her cooperation with this man could improve their situation. She fell into step with him, trying to ignore the soreness of her feet, the chill in her bones and the exhaustion nagging her.

"You did good work," complimented the general. "We have use for your skills, where we're going to be taking you."

"And where is that, may I ask?" Hanji did her best to keep her tone cordial and not let her fatigue make her tongue too loose. Now wasn't the time to be quirky.

The general, whose surname was Ulrich, she'd learned, stroked the dark, short-trimmed beard lining his squared jaw. He glanced around at the prisoners being guarded by his men, then at the civilians that passed by hurriedly, pointedly avoiding looking at the southern soldiers or their captives.

"Shigonshina," Ulrich finally answered. "There you and your comrades will be held in a guarded compound. Some may be released eventually and returned to military representatives of your country as an act of good faith, depending on negotiations."

"And the others?" pressed Hanji, looking straight ahead. She could guess the answer to that.

"Those of the most use will be held for longer, to work, to administer care for the ill..." he shrugged. "Prisoners of more value will remain in our custody as well."

Hanji absorbed this. "So it's a concentration camp."

"Your people also keep such compounds," reminded the general. "I'm sure some of my missing people are 'guests' in one of them as well."

Hanji grimaced. He wasn't wrong about that. "Okay, you've got me there. Tell me this, though; what about our captain? What are your plans for him?"

Ulrich stopped, took out a cigar from his coat pocket and lit it up. His brown eyes met Hanji's glittering in the flame's glow of his lighter. He took a puff, put the lighter out, and then spoke ambiguously. "Captain Ackerman killed five of my men in melee. I'm not even counting the ones his gunfire might have taken down. Two of those men, he killed with his bare hands."

"What's your point?" Hanji boldly demanded. "This is war and soldiers are trained to kill. You attacked us, and Levi acted as any other specialized combatant would. I'm sure you don't want to hear this right now sir, but you should know that the captain has spared countless numbers of your military's soldiers that we've captured in the past. He kills when he has to, not because he wants to."

Ulrich raised a brow briefly at her, and he reached up to remove the military hat from his head. He tucked it under an arm, and he combed his gloved fingers through his dark hair to loosen it from where it had been molded by the cap. "So I've already heard. Two of the men serving under me in this regiment were taken captive by your captain just last year. They reported to have been treated well during their captivity, and then they were returned through a prisoner exchange."

"Then you have to realize it wouldn't be very honorable to execute him," reasoned Hanji. She was speaking with her heart now, but she was too tired to completely stifle her personal feelings.

"Because of his past conduct towards prisoners of war, I already intend to make an exception," explained Ulrich, "but Captain Ackerman is a very dangerous man. He's spared captured soldiers, but he's personally killed more of them in combat than any other POW we've ever captured. Whether he survives this depends on his own actions, Dr. Zoë. My superiors don't suffer troublemakers. If he cooperates, he may live. I can promise you one thing, though: He won't be released from custody until your country withdraws their forces from Maria. We don't release weapons like the captain back into the hands of our enemies to be used against us again."

Hanji nearly scoffed at the man's word usage; but then again, it wouldn't be the first time she'd ever heard Levi referred to as a "weapon". She just couldn't quite recall where else she'd heard it before, right now. Levi's men often called him a machine when he got into cleaning or kicked ass on the field, but where else had she heard him called a weapon?

"I think in comparison to bombs and missiles, Captain Levi's mass destructive capabilities are being a little dramatized," Hanji blurted impulsively, smirking a little. Her smirk faded as she looked at Ulrich's serious expression. She probably shouldn't make fun of the man for his obvious respect—and perhaps even fear—of Levi's combat prowess. Best to make friends.

"You're a very interesting woman," commented the general. It didn't necessarily sound like a negative observation.

_Oh shit. When I was thinking I should make friends, this wasn't what I had in mind._

Hanji could see the covert interest in the Marian officer's gaze, and she groaned to herself.

"You must be tired," Ulrich said, evidently hearing the dismayed sound. "In recognition of what you've done for my men while we're lacking in medics, I'll arrange for you to have a private room for the night at the Inn. Under guard, of course, but you can bathe, sleep in a bed and get well-rested."

Hanji had some misgivings about his motivation, but perhaps she was just imagining things and being paranoid. Men typically didn't take much of an interest in her, especially when she was this grungy. It could be that the general was just being respectful of her, because he was indeed in short supply of medics to see to his injured.

"That would be nice," she said after some thought. She could make a weapon out of just about anything, if she had to. Just because they'd relieved her of all but her clothing did not mean she was defenseless.

* * *

Levi spent his night huddled in a cage with nothing but his issued uniform jacket to keep him warm. Sometime in the morning, just as the sun was rising, someone came by and squeezed a blanket through the bars for him. He didn't see who it was, but he felt it when it pressed against his combat boots and he quickly pulled it over him and shivered in it, trying to bring himself some body warmth. It seemed he'd only drifted off for a short while before his cage got struck by a rifle, the sharp clink startling him awake. Bleary-eyed, he peered up at the guard standing over him. The man said something in Marian that Levi couldn't quite catch, and then he unlocked his cage and motioned for him to come out.

The captain got to his feet with an inward groan, his body stiff and sore from the harsh exposure to the cold and poor sleeping position he'd been in. Used to sleep deprivation, however, Levi snapped his brain into alert mode as he ducked out of the cage and looked around. They appeared to be getting ready for departure. He'd overheard someone mention Shiganshina last night, so he presumed they must be heading there.

_And that means the place is so overrun, we couldn't have done much to liberate it._

Levi frowned. With each day, it seemed they lost more ground to the southern armies. Sinarian presence in this country wasn't doing much good. It was more apparent now than ever before, and he toyed with the "what if" of how things would have been had he chosen not to board his flight back when he left Ehrmich. They'd have listed him as AWOL and the MP's would have hunted him down and put him on trial for desertion, most likely. Still, he might have gotten more time with Erwin, his mother and Isabel before that happened. He had a sick feeling he might never make it home to see them again.

Levi spotted Hanji as he got into marching formation with his fellow captives. She was just about to board one of the transports carrying the wounded, but she changed her itinerary when she saw Levi. She had a thermos in her hands, and she gave him a worried look as she unscrewed the lid and poured some kind of hot brew into the cup attachment.

"Here, Levi. This will warm you up. You should take some aspirin, too, and a multivitamin."

He took it with his hands, the wrists still cuffed together at the front. He sniffed at it, and he realized it was some kind of creamy broth. He drank it down without question. It wasn't bad, and it tasted of chicken and vegetables. There were a few pieces of soft-cooked onion and carrot in it, and he chewed them up and swallowed them.

"How's Moblit?" He gave the cup back to her, watched her rinse it with her water canteen before screwing it back onto the thermos lid. She handed over her canteen and gave him a couple of aspirin from the bottle in her pocket.

"He's holding up," she answered. "He's in pain, but I'm about to administer some more medicine to him and try to get him to eat something. They'll be passing out bred soon, but you need more than that to keep up your strength."

He nodded, took the two aspirin and washed them down. He did the same with the vitamin she gave him next, and he drank thirstily from the water. It was ice cold in contrast to the soup he'd drank down earlier, but it was clean and refreshing.

"So what's the verdict for us?" he finally asked, wiping his mouth after giving her the water container back.

"It doesn't look too good," admitted Hanji. "I spoke with General Ulrich last night, and they're taking us to Shiganshina. They've turned the place into a concentration camp for POW's and rebels, Levi. We wouldn't have stood a chance capturing that place and repelling enemy forces from there. The reports given by the last recon squad that checked it out were misleading; probably because they were old and the occupying forces had time to reinforce and take over completely before we could get there."

"I see." He looked down with a scowl on his lips. "Damn it, they're routing us at every turn. We might as well by going at them with pop guns and toy swords."

"You get that feeling too, huh?" Hanji sighed. "Well, the good news is they don't plan on executing you. At least, according to the general. He could be lying, but he seemed sincere."

"Huh. Did he say why?"

"You've got a reputation." Hanji smirked. "All those times you spared injured Marian soldiers captured and conducted prisoner exchanges hasn't gone un-noticed. I also suspect they'll want to try and get information out of you, though. My overall impression is that you're too valuable a prisoner for them to kill, so if nothing else, you've got time."

"I'm not telling them jack shit," vowed Levi.

Hanji's smirk faded. "I wouldn't expect you to, but you could give them misleading information. As long as they think you could be useful, they'll keep you alive. Stay alive, Levi. That should be your top priority, okay? We could be stuck in this camp for years, but as long as we're more useful to them alive than dead, we have a chance of escape or rescue. I know you want to see Erwin again."

Levi faltered at the mention of Erwin's name. Yes, he wanted to see his lover again. There was still so much to say and do between them, so many missed opportunities to make up for. If he could make it through this war alive and get back home, then he and Erwin could be happy together. They could eventually move in together, maybe even get hitched. They had a chance to live in peace; a luxury never afforded to them in the previous life.

"I'll do what I can to survive this without giving away any government secrets," he promised softly to Hanji, "but what are you gonna do, four-eyes?"

She shrugged. "Care for the injured, make new friends, plot our escape. You know me."

"Heh. Yeah, I know you."

Levi of all people knew that Hanji Zoë had a talent for making the most unlikely friends. Differences in philosophical beliefs, lifestyles or even alliances never proved much of a deterrent to her developing a rapport with people. Much as she could drive him crazy with frustration, Levi had to admit she was a likable nut. If he knew Hanji, she planned on using that to her advantage to gain trust with their captors. He didn't say anything more about it because the guards were checking the formation to do head counts and ensure everyone was properly secured, and Levi didn't want to arouse suspicion.

"Just take care, shitty-glasses," he advised when she was led away and admonished for lingering around the captive officers. Congregating in groups was always prohibited in these situations, and that was universal on both sides. They would have to be careful about how they communicated with each other. Levi got the feeling that he and his surviving two officers would be kept separated at the POW camp. In fact, he was likely going to be more closely watched than anyone.

* * *

-To be continued


	16. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't think there's really anything cuter than the Shiganshina trio at six years old.

"Thank you for meeting up with me, Mother."

Erwin gazed down at the bistro menu absently, having no real appetite for food. The only thing he was hungry for now was some hopeful news about Levi, Hanji and Moblit, but it had been over a week since the incident that left him wondering if he'd ever lay eyes on his lover again. He'd even started window-shopping for men's wedding bands before that terrible interruption to his and Levi's video conversation happened. He hadn't mentioned it to the captain, knowing that Levi was a little skittish about jumping into anything too fast. It didn't hurt to get an idea of would suit them as wedding rings, in the meantime. Erwin liked to be prepared.

"Thank you for inviting me to lunch," replied Constance. She gave Erwin a tired smile. "You look very tense. Still no word on the captain?"

Erwin shook his head, looking up from his menu to meet her eyes. "All I've been able to learn so far is that Levi's name isn't listed amongst the casualties, and his status is 'missing in action'. Apparently the aggressors captured a lot of the survivors from Recon 16, but the names of who they took haven't been released. If the military has a list of the captive survivors yet, they're keeping a tight lid on it and sealing it as classified information. Levi could be in that group, or he could have escaped, or...or his body was unrecoverable."

"Try not to think that way," soothed Erwin's mother. "I've spoken to my old drill instructor on the matter, and he told me that the area was cleared by the Garrison army after the attack. There weren't enough solid structures destroyed in that camp for any of the fallen to be buried too deep for recovery, Erwin. If Levi's tags had been found anywhere, Pixis would have told me."

"You've been reaching out to people about this?"

Erwin was mildly surprised. While his mother respected and appreciated the effort and sacrifices their men and women in uniform were making, she'd retired from the military precisely because she saw the conflict rising in Maria, and she predicted that one day, they would end up at war. She hadn't foreseen it starting with a civil conflict in that country, but she was right about Sina eventually invading there. She wanted nothing to do with it, and she'd known that certain branches of the Military Police might get called upon to fight for their country alongside the other branches. Constance didn't usually keep close tabs on the progress of the war, aside from what got reported on the nightly news. It broke her heart to see the world so divided.

"How can I not?" She sighed, and she patted a loose strand of light brown hair back into place that had come free of the twist she'd styled it into. "My future son-in-law is—"

"Mom, we aren't really engaged yet—"

"My _future son-in-law_ ," she insisted, cutting him off with a warning glance, "is over there fighting for our nation and the freedom of the northern Maria territories. Whether I agree with our involvement in this conflict or not, the fact is that we _are_ involved. Sometimes you just have to stop sticking your head in the sand and trying to be neutral. Commander Pixis has promised to keep me updated on any information he can provide about the situation that isn't highly classified."

Erwin managed a smile. He'd always admired his mother, and now that he recalled his previous life, he understood why. Perhaps the true reason he'd taken up writing instead of joining the military was because his heart recalled what it was like to be a soldier, even if it took longer for his mind to catch up. In his other life, Erwin had often wondered what it would have been like to live the quiet life of a teacher or scholar, but his sense of duty kept him from pursuing that interest.

"You know, I think I'm more like you than I am Dad."

"In some ways, maybe." She nodded. "I think you would have made a brilliant soldier, if that was the path you'd chosen. You're also a scholar like him, though."

Erwin grimaced. The bitterness of his falling out with his dad was still so fresh, and it stung even though his thoughts were dominated by Levi's fate. "He evidently takes no pride in that."

She reached across the table and squeezed Erwin's hand. "Believe it or not, your father does love you, Erwin. He's always pushed you so hard because he wants to see you succeed, and he believes you would do better at that if you followed my footsteps instead of his. He behaved badly over your relationship with Levi, but I will say that wrong or not, he reacted that way because he was hoping for grandchildren someday, and in his eyes, being in an openly gay relationship is only going to add to your hardships in life."

"It isn't his decision to make," Erwin stated flatly, anger rising to the surface. "I'm a grown man, and my life is my own to lead how I see fit."

"I agree with you, son," she assured, "and I saw for myself how happy Levi makes you. That's all a mother can really ask, for her children. I just want you to know that regardless of his rude behavior and his bull-headed ways, your dad really does love you. I only hope he'll show you as much himself, some day."

Erwin sighed. Like Levi, he had the same parents in this life as he had in the previous one, but he'd lost his mother just one year before his father was killed in that life. He'd never had the chance to get to know them back then as he did now.

"You were talking about divorcing him, and now you're defending him," Erwin pointed out. He paused as the waiter brought them some ice water and the drinks they'd ordered, and he told the man to give them another minute to decide. When the waiter walked away, Erwin spoke to his mother again. "Why are you making excuses for Dad if you can't even stand to be with him anymore yourself?"

"I still love your father," she explained. "I just don't like the man he's turned into lately. I'm mad at him for the way he treated you, honey. That doesn't mean I've stopped loving him."

Erwin's confusion faded a little, but not completely. "What are you going to do, Mother? Are you going to stay with him after all, or follow through with your consideration of leaving him?"

"He needs me right now," she stated calmly, "so for the time being, I'll stay. I'm going to give him time to recuperate and the chance to change his attitude. If it doesn't improve by the time he's regained full strength, then I'll consider divorce again. I can't abandon him when he's like this, no matter how frustrated I am with him."

Erwin smiled at her with admiration. "Your devotion is as strong as my Levi's, Mom. Dad is a very lucky man."

She chuckled. "He doesn't know how lucky he is. Just let me handle your father, Erwin. You need to be strong for Levi. I haven't had the chance to get to know him yet, but he gave me the strong impression that he wouldn't approve of you putting your life on hold and moping around while you're waiting to hear some news about him."

Erwin lowered his gaze. "No, he wouldn't. You're right about that."

"So don't put your life on hold," she advised seriously. "Be strong for him. Pray for him and take care of yourself. I may not know him yet, but I could tell from our brief meeting and the things you've said about him is that he's a good man and a good soldier."

Erwin nodded, whole-heartedly agreeing with her. "Yes, he is. Better than most."

"And he'll have you waiting here fit and hail for him when he comes back," she insisted. Constance lifted her menu and scanned it again. "So, let's decide on what we're going to eat. I'm starving. What's good here, son?"

"I asked you to join me here because I know that you like eggplant, and their grilled eggplant panini is really good."

She found the item on the menu, read the description and nodded. "Then I know what I'm having."

* * *

The rain was a cold drizzle down the back of his neck. Levi ignored it, and he kept loading the heavy stones mined from the quarry into the wheelbarrow. He'd actually volunteered for this back-breaking work, not only to spare one of his men from being forced to do it, but to keep his body in shape and his mind occupied. They'd been in the concentration camp now for six days and counting. Hanji was now more or less the resident doctor, and Moblit had recovered enough to start assisting her.

Levi couldn't say the food was all that bad in this place. Bland and in small portions, but their captors made sure to feed detainees three times per day. So far, he hadn't come across any rancid meat on the two days since coming here that he actually got some, but the bread was often hard as a brick and moldy at the edges. Most of the prisoners' meals consisted of porridge, gruel, bread, watered down stew, canned, processed meat and sometimes trail mix. Fresh fruit and veggies and un-processed meat cuts were only served to those who contributed to hard labor or medical care, and then only sparingly.

Captive officers like Levi were given slightly more to eat, along with small perks like hot water for bathing, cigarettes, alcohol, tea or coffee rations and, if they wished, conjugal privileges with local sex workers that came in once a week. It was their small reward for their efforts. The rest of the captives—those with no needed skill sets that weren't in good enough condition to do hard labor—had to work in the factories or in the soup kitchen.

Levi supposed things could have been worse, but he also bore in mind that several people held within the camp had vanished in the night by day three of reaching Shiganshina. Two of those had been his own men, and as he started loading yet another slab of rock onto his wheelbarrow, his jaw clenched. He didn't care about the blisters on his palms. He didn't care about the tightness in his chest, likely caused by the beginnings of a cold from exposure to the wet cold. Levi wanted to know where they'd taken those wounded soldiers. Did they execute them to cut down on the number of mouths to feed, since they could do no work in the camp? Had he bitten into meat that came from one of his own men the night before, when they served "mutton" to him?

_That's crazy. I'm letting my imagination run away with me. It was sheep, not human. I've had mutton stew before. I know what the shit tastes like._

But he had no idea what the meat from a human being would taste like, so how could he be so certain? The slab of meat he'd been given with his potato was tough and gamey, as expected of mutton. The last time he'd tried meat of that sort, it had been seasoned and tenderized in the stew, so Levi really couldn't be positive that it was the same thing. What they'd served him was just roasted plain. He sure as hell wouldn't have been able to recognize it as a cut originating from a human being, unless they'd tossed a roasted hand or foot on his plate.

All the sudden, Levi felt nausea surging in his stomach. His mind became filled with images from a past long gone of gigantic, malformed creatures gorging themselves on screaming, tiny humans. How many times had he witnessed one of his comrades being bitten in half or swallowed whole? He knew the likelihood that his captors had fed him the flesh of one of his own men was almost negligent, but he couldn't get the thought out of his head.

Levi dropped the rock he was carrying, bent over and threw up all over it.

* * *

Hanji wasn't really surprised when Levi was more or less dragged into the medical tent and deposited onto a cot by the guards. He'd been working out in the quarry in wet, cold conditions for two days in a row, almost from sunup to sundown. As bad-ass as Levi was, complete immunity from harsh conditions and illness weren't his. He might have a stronger constitution than most, but Hanji had already warned him to take every break allowed to him, dry off and warm up.

"Little bastard's heavy," grunted one of the guards in Marian.

Hanji approached, and she bent over to check Levi's temperature. Right now, his forehead was cold to the touch, but that was likely due to his exposure to the elements. She could feel the underlying heat of an impending fever building up. "What happened?"

"We're not sure," the second guard admitted, speaking passable Sinarian. "Captain Ackerman was doing twice the work load as everyone else, as usual. He suddenly threw up and collapsed."

Hanji sighed. She wanted to admonish them for allowing it to go this far, but she understood they were only doing their assigned duty, and knowing Levi, he probably gave no indication that he wasn't feeling well before it finally got the better of him.

"Take him off quarry labor duty until I've confirmed that he's fit enough to do more. He's probably earned himself a lung infection, working in these conditions."

"Yes ma'am," agreed the one that had complained about Levi's surprising weight. "We'll inform our superiors."

Hanji immediately went to her medical supply cabinet and unlocked it to seek out proper medication to administer to Levi. She nodded in satisfaction as the guards left and one of her helpers covered Levi up with a heavy blanket. Prisoner or not, she was treated with respect more often than not by both her fellow prisoners and those holding them in captivity. There were certain perks to being a doctor.

Moblit came into the medical tent just as Hanji was measuring out a dose of liquid antibiotics to add to a broth for Levi. The blond saw the captain lying there, and he stopped with concern, feeling Levi's forehead with his palm.

"Hanji, what happened to him?"

She shrugged, and she filled a wooden bowl with some of the warm soup she kept in a thermos for sick patients. "The little terror overworked himself, that's what. Does this surprise you?"

Moblit sighed, and he pulled up a stool to sit at Levi's side. "Not surprising at all. I was just under the impression that this man's constitution was super human."

"You and most others," stated Hanji dryly. "Sadly for Levi, that isn't the case. He has a will of iron, but even he can only push his body so far before it fails on him. And all this just to spare some of his men the labor."

She clucked her tongue, and she stirred the bowl of soup with the antibiotic solution in it. "Moblit, try to wake him up and help him sit up. He needs to try to eat this. If he can't, then I guess we'll have to administer a shot."

She tried to avoid using injection methods unless there was no other choice, because their syringe supply was limited. They re-used the syringes themselves after washing and sterilizing them, but there was no way in hell Hanji would use the same needle more than once. Moblit gently shook Levi to rouse him as she approached, and when the captain grumbled and swatted at him, Moblit explained why they needed him awake. Levi didn't even open his eyes as he allowed Moblit to support him in a sitting position. He blindly took the warm bowl Hanji pressed into his hands, and he sipped the broth down gingerly.

"Not sure I can hold this down," admitted Levi between sips.

"Just try," encouraged Hanji. "We'll give you a shot if we have to. I'll brew you up some peppermint tea after this, to help with the nausea."

"Thanks, four eyes." Levi finished the soup, and he handed the bowl back to her, finally opening his dark rimmed gray eyes a crack. "It hit me so suddenly. My head was spinning with thoughts I normally wouldn't give credence to. I just couldn't stop thinking, and next thing I knew, I was losing this morning's breakfast."

"You aren't getting enough nutrition," suggested Moblit with a frown. "You need more fruit and vegetables in your diet, sir."

"I can only eat what they provide for me," reminded Levi. "What am I supposed to do, magically conjure apples out of thin air?"

"No, but you could try eating the fruit you're given yourself, instead of giving it all away to your men in recovery," chastised Hanji. She crossed her arms over her chest. "I'm onto you, pipsqueak. I saw you sneak that plumb to Corporal Haines yesterday, and I know you've been passing out your other fruit and vegetable rations to more of my patients."

"They need the extra vitamins to get better," he excused. "I was fine until a little while ago, so I figured they needed it more than me. Stop looking so matronly, bitch. I've seen you give away your rations before, too."

Hanji chuckled, and she nodded. "True, I do share with our people when I can...and that's something a good doctor and superior officer should do. However, I don't neglect myself in the process, Levi. If I give it all away and leave none for myself, I could end up with scurvy and then I wouldn't be fit to care for my patients. You have the same responsibility to look out for yourself as well. Yes, when you have a little extra, by all means share it with someone you think needs it. Don't give it _all_ away, though. We only get one or two pieces of fresh fruit a day. Save one for yourself. You need to stay healthy; not just for yourself, but for your men."

"Fine. I'll try to remember to eat more fruits and veggies," he grumbled.

Hanji smiled at him, and she boldly reached out to pat his whiskered cheek. The poor thing must be going crazy over the facial hair growth, by now. They'd promised Levi a razor so he could shave, but so far they hadn't delivered. Lucky for the captain his facial hair didn't grow fast, or he'd have a beard by now.

"You're a real sweetheart, Levi."

"Shut up, I am not."

Hanji chuckled. "Deny it all you like, but it's the truth. You're excessively self-sacrificing for your comrades, and while that's an admirable trait, it also makes me worry. Promise me that you won't neglect your own nutritional needs anymore, runt."

"All right, enough," he snapped, pale eyes flashing with annoyance. "I said I'll save some for myself, didn't I? You're not my mom."

"No I'm not," agreed Hanji, withdrawing her hand, "but I think I know what she'd have to say about this, and so do you. Don't make me tattle on you when we get out of this mess, Levi."

"You say that like you're sure we even will," he pointed out.

"I'm working on a plan," she insisted, shooting a quick glance around. She waited for a group of patrolling guards to pass by outside before lowering her voice and going on. "I've been chatting up General Ulrich. He seems to have taken a shine to me. If I can influence him to speed up prisoner exchange negotiations, we might get out of here sooner, without a fight. If not...well, I've gotten a pretty good lay of the land. All we need to do is plan our escape route and wait for the right moment, but you need to be fit enough to move when it's time."

"I'm not gonna slip out of here and leave my men behind," Levi said stubbornly, "and you need to watch it. The guy's not a moron, Hanji. He'll figure it out if you push him too hard."

"Oh, I'm sure he knows I have an ulterior motive behind our friendly little chats," she agreed, "but he's a man, and men have one universal weakness."

Levi stared at her, and so did Moblit. "Don't tell me..."

Hanji shrugged, fighting back her own distaste at the thought of how far she might have to go in order to procure their freedom. "If offering up my snatch is what it takes, I'm willing to make the sacrifice."

"Hanji, no!" Moblit looked like he was about to cry. "You don't even _like_ men! How could you possibly even consider doing something like that?"

"Because this is war," she reminded, sobering quickly. "Plenty of women caught up in this have been through a lot worse than voluntarily giving it up for the greater good. Most of them aren't even given a choice, but at least I can give Ulrich props for being a gentleman, so far. He hasn't tried to force himself on me, though I can tell he's interested. I'd rather do something unpleasant on my own terms than have someone physically force it on me."

"That's sick, and you're crazy," Levi sighed. He laid back down, and he rubbed his tired eyes. "Don't do it, Hanji. I know you think you're in control now, but this is something you won't be able to take back. It'll stay with you for the rest of your life, and you'll hate yourself for doing it. Don't even put it on the table as an option. If all else fails, then we'll just be stuck here. I'm not getting out at the expense of your dignity."

"Me either," agreed Moblit with a frown. "I'm with the captain on this one, doctor. I'll bite and claw my way out if I have to, but I won't let you make that kind of sacrifice for me."

Hanji sighed. "You stubborn men." She smiled at them both. "But I do love you for it. All right, I'll try to come up with another way."

Or at least, if she had to go through with her unpleasant idea, she would be sure not to tell either of them about it. Levi and Moblit would probably kill Ulrich if they found out he had his way with her, now that she thought of it. Of Moblit, she'd rather expected this kind of reaction. Levi had surprised her a little, though. The comradery between the three of them warmed Hanji's heart, and it felt older and more familiar to her than seemed logical. She literally felt like they'd all been friends for longer than one lifetime, and it made her think of the dreams she sometimes had.

"Hey guys," she said thoughtfully, "do you believe in past lives?"

"Not really," said Moblit.

Levi's answer came a little slower. "I guess. You've asked me this before."

"Did I?" Hanji scratched her head. "I suppose we've had so much going on that I forgot. Anyway, I keep experiencing deja vu. I saw this one giant blond guard yesterday that I swear I've seen somewhere before, but I can't remember where.

"Giant blond guard?" Levi opened his eyes and looked up at her. "Did he have a big honker?"

"I wouldn't say _excessively_ big, but he did have a rather prominent nose, like yours truly." She shrugged. "Not a bad looking guy. His hair is a little lighter than Moblit's, and he's even taller than Erwin. Do you know who I'm talking about, Levi?"

"I'm not sure," he answered guardedly. "Maybe. Was his name Mike?"

"I don't know, I didn't ask him." Hanji frowned. Now that she thought of it, the name Mike did seem to fit the guy she was talking about. "Have you met him, Levi?"

"Maybe. My head's throbbing too much right now to think on it much. How about that tea you mentioned?"

"Oh, right." Hanji set aside the empty soup bowl she'd been holding, and she got up to go and rummage through her pantry supplies. She found the tea packets, and she plugged in the electric water kettle to heat it up.

"Hey, four-eyes."

Hanji turned to look back at Levi. "Hmm?"

"What do you think people taste like?"

The question drew her to a complete halt. "What? You mean as in human flesh?"

"Yeah. Think it would taste like lamb or chicken?"

Hanji exchanged a look with Moblit, and by the expression on the blond's face, he found it just as odd and unexpected as she did. "Levi, that's a disturbing question even for me. What in the world made you ask such a thing?"

"I dunno. Just curious, I guess. I figured if anyone would know, it would be you."

Hanji scoffed indignantly. "Oh, come on! I know you think I'm fruit loops but I'm not _that_ bad! Do you really think I've ever been into cannibalism?"

"No, but you're into biology and shit," explained Levi. "You'd probably know better than anyone else around here what animal humans would taste the most like."

Hanji almost didn't hear the kettle boiling. His logic had succeeded in getting her attention, and now she was pondering without meaning to. She put a tea bag into the mug she'd procured, and she poured the steaming water over it before carrying it to Levi. As he sat up with Moblit's help, Hanji gave him the drink, and she felt his forehead. Yes, he was definitely feverish.

"Levi, did something happen that you aren't telling us? I'm starting to worry even more about you."

"Just a wild thought that popped into my head before I got sick," he muttered. He stared into his cup with his dark brows pinched. "People have been taken away in the night, since we got here. They're not telling us anything about it. We don't know what happened to those people."

"So you're thinking they might be serving them to us?" guessed Hanji. It made a sort of macabre sense, and now she thought she understood where this strange line of questions had come from.

"I know it's crazy. It's not something I'd usually come up with, and maybe it's just the fever talking, but you hear things about these POW camps. I know our people would never do something like that, but the Marians might."

"Well, I highly doubt it," she soothed. "Try not to think like that, Levi. The meat they serve us is often tough and bland, but I'm sure it all comes from animals. I'll try mentioning the missing people to the general the next time we talk. Maybe he'll tell me something, maybe he won't, but it couldn't hurt to ask."

"Yeah, should be safe enough," he agreed.

* * *

It took Levi a full week to recover, as he developed bronchitis that damned near turned into pneumonia. With Hanji and Moblit's diligent care, he fought it off eventually. For the first two days of contracting his lung infection, Levi had been so feverish that he stayed in a half-conscious state. Much to his embarrassment, Hanji informed him that he'd called Erwin's name several times in his feverish delirium. Levi dreamt of his past life often while battling his illness. Most of his dreams were bad and featured lots of blood and death, but some were pleasant. One of them caught his attention more than the others, though. He finally retrieved the memory of reaching the basement in the Jaeger home and discovering the origin of the titans.

Once his fever cleared up and he was able to think coherently, he debated with himself over whether he should share this memory with Erwin, if he ever got to see him again. Erwin had asked him several times if he remembered anything more past the moment of his death. Even now in this life, Erwin was determined to know the truth about the titans. It was almost obsessive, and Levi admitted to himself that his lover _needed_ that closure, even if it was completely irrelevant to their current lives. What could Erwin do with this information now? Absolutely nothing...however, it would finally answer those questions the man couldn't let go of.

"Erwin, I don't want you living in the past anymore," Levi whispered to himself one morning while looking at the photo of his boyfriend in the author bio of Erwin's book. Thankfully, their captors had allowed Levi to keep the book once they looked through it to be sure there weren't any notes or codes written in the pages.

"I don't want to live in the past either," Levi went on. He touched the photo, tracing Erwin's handsome features with the tip of a finger. "It's not fucking fair to either of us. Every time I think of what we eventually found, I can't help but see your death replay in my mind. But if I don't tell you, then you'll never let it go, and you'll keep asking me. I guess I'd better just give it up when I see you again, and hopefully we can move on."

He swallowed, thinking of the agreement he'd made with Erwin. He told the man he wasn't ready to jump into matrimony with him. He'd said that while they'd known each other for two lifetimes, the relationship they were in was still new and they needed to test the waters more. Now that he was stuck in this concentration camp, Levi realized that perhaps such caution wasn't necessary with Erwin. The commander was his soul mate, without a doubt. They'd been cautious enough in the past and denied themselves the happiness they truly wanted. He'd had time to reconsider his decision, and he was tired of taking things for granted.

"No more caution," decided Levi. "If I get out of this and get home, we're getting hitched."

Levi heard voices behind him at the fence surrounding the compound. He turned on the rock he was sitting on, and when he saw three curious pairs of eyes watching him from the other side of the chain links, he froze. He knew all three sets of those eyes. He knew the faces they were set in, though said faces were about eight or nine years younger than they had been the last time he'd seen them.

_Holy shit, it's the brat pack. What the hell are they doing here?_

Standing at the other side of the fence were three small children. One was a little boy with pale blond, shoulder-length hair and big blue eyes. The other little boy was slightly taller with a tan complexion, shaggy brown hair and bright green, gold-flecked eyes. Then there was a little girl with Asian features, shiny black hair and skin like a porcelain doll. Her deep gray eyes were as openly curious as the other two pairs beside her, though not quite as easy to read.

"What are you kids doing here?" Levi asked in Marian, unsettled. He hadn't been expecting to run into this bunch, and he couldn't imagine what a trio of children that small would be doing wandering around without any adult supervision. "Where the hell are your parents?"

Mikasa and Armin exchanged a glance, while Eren quietly lowered his eyes and frowned.

"We don't have any, Sir," answered Mikasa softly, also speaking Marian. "They're all gone."

Of course. These were children of war. Now it made some sense. The conflict had orphaned all three of them, apparently.

"Who's watching over you?" Levi pressed, interested in spite of himself. Surely they had _somewhere_ to go.

As if summoned by the question, a woman with long brown hair wearing a long brown coat and winter boots came running up from the pond in the distance. She looked blatantly relieved to find the children at the fence, and she hurried over to them.

"Eren, Mikasa, Armin! What have I told you about wandering off? You can't be this close to the fence, children! They keep dangerous people in there!"

Levi clicked his tongue with annoyance, narrowing his eyes at the woman. He supposed he couldn't blame her for the assumption she'd made about him and his fellow prisoners. The government and media in Sina wasn't exactly forthwith about the details they gave to the public, either. Both sides painted the other as the villains, so of course this woman would think of the detainees in the camp as criminals.

"I couldn't get to them to hurt them even if I wanted to," Levi pointed out. He nodded at the guard standing at the nearby tower. The guy was watching the exchange attentively, but he wasn't drawing his gun. "If I didn't zap myself unconscious trying to scale this fence, he'd shoot me well before I could get to the other side. That being said, you'd better keep the brats clear of the fence for their own safety. The top might be the only part that's electrified, but it would suck if one of these kids got unlucky enough to touch a spot that's the exception to the rule."

She regarded him warily, and then she ushered the children around her. "Come on, kids. It isn't safe."

They followed her, but Eren looked back at Levi as he took the woman's hand and let her guide him away. He stumbled a little on a rock, but he didn't stop staring at the captain. There was an unsettling kind of recognition in that gem-bright gaze, and Levi wondered if the boy might be one of the few that had somehow retained his memories of the past.

* * *

Levi went back to doing hard labor as soon as he was given the green light by Hanji to do so. His unexpected encounter with the Shiganshina trio weighed heavily on his mind as a couple of days flew by, and he wondered if the rest of the 104th trainee squad had been reborn somewhere as well. It was ironic that they just happened to be living in the location by the same name as the one they originally grew up in.

"At least this time, they don't have to worry about getting eaten alive," sighed Levi.

He shoveled more dirt away to clear it so that they could break up the rock beneath. The notion that there were no titans in this life to threaten those kids was of little comfort to him. They'd already lost their families, and that sucked balls. Levi scratched irritably at the short beard now shadowing his jaw. They'd told him yesterday that his request for a razor was still noted, and they promised he should have the item and some shaving cream by the weekend. Until then, he was just going to have to deal. His hair was growing out too, and his signature undercut would soon become shag. At least he had a comb and hair product to keep it clean, but he might soon have to talk Hanji into taking her scissors to it in order to at least keep his bangs out of his eyes.

He missed Erwin. It grew more intense with each passing day, and Levi often found himself staring at the blond's picture in his book at night before going to sleep. At least he had that to comfort him. He'd already read Erwin's book through twice, and he was thinking of re-starting it again, if only to imagine his lover's voice speaking the words printed in those pages. Erwin's writing style was very much like his speaking style, so it was easy for Levi to imagine his voice as he read.

"Who are you?"

Levi paused in his digging at the female voice, and he turned to see the same woman from the other day standing at the fence. She had a basket in her hands, filled with berries she'd evidently been out picking.

Levi stuck the shovel in the ground, and he rested an elbow casually over the handle. "You first."

She hesitated, and she looked away. "My name is Gisele, sir."

"Nice to meet you," Levi said flatly. "Why do you want to know who I am, Gisele?"

She swallowed, and she met his eyes. She seemed afraid of him, yet there she was, talking to him through the fence. "Do you remember the children from the other day, sir?"

Levi nodded.

"Well, one of the little boys...his name is Eren...he's started talking again since seeing you."

"What do you mean, 'talking again'?" Levi couldn't imagine Eren Jaeger shutting up even to save his own life, so he was admittedly curious over her statement. The Eren he used to know didn't know how to shut his trap, and he'd tended to blurt out random bullshit at the oddest moments.

"Eren hasn't spoken a word since his parents got crushed in a building during an attack by the southern forces," she explained. "Mikasa and Armin are his closest friends, and I think if it weren't for those two, the boy would be completely lost to us."

Levi nodded. It made a horrible kind of sense. "How old are those kids? Seven? Eight?"

"They're all six," answered Gisele. She tilted her head, looking him up and down. "You aren't as scary as I first thought, sir. May I ask again what your name is?"

Levi sighed. Six. The fucking kids were barely out of toddlerhood, and already they'd lost their families. God, the world was still fucked up, even without titans. "Levi Ackerman," he finally said.

"Ackerman?" She blinked. "That's Mikasa's last name, too."

"I guess we're pretty spread out," he excused. "So why are you so interested in my name? Just because the kid's started talking again?"

"Eren calls you 'Captain'," she said, obviously shaking herself out of her surprise. "Captain Levi. Have you met Eren before? Are you a captain at all? I'm trying to understand how he knows you. Ever since he saw you, all he keeps talking about is 'Captain Levi' and how he'll save us. Eren has always been a little odd and aside from his two friends, the other children stay away from him. This is new to me, though. I'm very happy that he's found the power of speech again, but I don't understand what he's talking about, and I thought you could help me."

Levi froze, his pupils squeezing to pinpoints.

 _Holy fucking shit...the shitty brat_ does _remember me. How the fuck?_

Levi pulled his thoughts together. He couldn't tell this girl that he and Eren knew each other in a past life, so he improvised. "We've passed through Shiganshina before, back when it was still free of southern rule. Maybe the kid just remembers me from that time."

"But why would he keep insisting that you'll save us?" she pressed, frowning. "Did you speak with him the last time you were here? Did you say something to put that notion into his head?"

Levi bit back a groan. If he were to guess, Eren's belief in him as some kind of savior probably stemmed from past life memories of Levi saving his ass, time and time again. In the boy's underdeveloped mind, he probably saw Levi as some kind of super hero. Eren couldn't possibly understand where those memories of the past came from or what they meant, at such a tender age.

"Last time we were here, we came with ration supplies for the town," explained Levi, using the most logical explanation he could think of to explain Eren's awe of him. "You'd all had a hard winter with bad crop harvests. I know what you must think of us Sinarians, but war and disaster relief has been part of our duties since this shit first started. Maybe Eren got the notion because I was leading the squad that came with the supplies, who knows? Kids get funny ideas sometimes."

"I see." It was plain that she _didn't_ quite see, though.

"So you're raising those kids now?" Levi asked, more interested than he cared to admit.

She nodded. "I'm fostering them, for now. No families want to take in extra mouths to feed in a time like this, though. If...if I had a way to do it, I would take them to a Sinarian embassy."

Levi frowned. "Why? You were just saying the other day that you think we're 'dangerous'. Why hand those kids over to someone you think is the enemy? That doesn't make any damned sense."

"I thought that way, true. Then I saw how excited Eren was after seeing you. I'm not a close-minded person, Captain. I want what's best for these children, and I know that Sina is in a far better state right now than Maria. As war refugees, these kids could have a chance in your country. They could get a good education, go to bed with full stomachs each night, maybe even have a loving new family. It's been...it's been..."

She sniffed and looked away with a shake of her head, and her eyes glistened with tears.

Levi understood, though he tried to stay emotionally detached from her plight. "It's been hell," he finished for her. "I get that. You're taking up a responsibility nobody else is willing to take, and you just want those kids to have a chance, even if it's in another country."

"Yes," Gisele agreed huskily, wiping at her eyes. "You're absolutely right, Captain Levi. I want them safe, and I'm not strong enough on my own to ensure that."

"So what? You came to me hoping I could somehow wisk them out of here? Take a look at my situation, lady."

"I...I know," she admitted, shame-faced. "I'm sorry. I just thought that if your countrymen ever come and liberate you, maybe you would consider taking the children. I know it's a lot to ask, and I know it's unrealistic."

Levi started to make another scathing remark, but he held back. This young woman couldn't be much older than twenty, and she was taking care of three orphans on her own. "Where are your folks, girl?"

She lowered her gaze. "They passed during the same attack that took the children's parents from them."

Levi sighed heavily. Well, he'd asked. Seeing how many parents this war had taken, he was more grateful to have his mother alive and well than ever. "So you're just as much an orphan yourself. That's fucked up." He really didn't know what else to say about it.

"I'm getting by," she said, straightening up a little. "It's hard, but I can take care of myself. Those children are who I'm most worried about."

Levi nodded, and when he saw a guard approaching, he resumed digging. The man stopped, apparently satisfied that he was doing his assigned work. "Well, it might not be much consolation, but from what I see, you're doing a pretty damned good job watching over those brats. Don't sell yourself short, Gisele."

She was quiet for so long that Levi thought she'd left, but when he looked up from his work, she was still standing there, watching him thoughtfully. "Something else on your mind?"

"I think I'm going to allow Eren to come and visit you," she said at last. "Are you here at this time every day?"

"Yeah, same time, same place," said Levi, fighting back unreasonable panic, "but maybe you shouldn't encourage the kid to hang out around here."

"These guards wouldn't harm a child," she said decisively. "They aren't like the soldiers that came the last time. Yes, they've imposed Martial Law on us, but ultimately we're more protected now than we ever were before. Now that I've spoken to you, I feel it's safe enough to let him visit. He's been asking constantly, since seeing you. I think it will be good for him. You seem to make Eren feel safe."

_Shit. As if listening to that kid's chatter wasn't bad enough when he was a teenager. Now I'm gonna have Eren as a six-year-old yapping my fucking ear off every day._

As much as Levi griped inwardly over it, he had to admit that he wouldn't really mind the company. It was familiar, and like it or not, he'd gotten attached to the screaming little shit back in the day.

"Fine, but don't blame me if he starts getting some crazy ideas in his head," Levi grumbled at last.

* * *

Because he knew that Levi's mother must be worried sick as much as he was, Erwin decided to invite Kuchel and Isabel to come and stay with him for the weekend. It was going on three weeks now since Levi went MIA, and they all could use a little morale. He offered his guests his bedroom to sleep in during their stay, and he pulled out the folding bed in the couch for himself. He invited his parents to come to dinner on Saturday night so that they could get acquainted with Levi's mom, but of course, only his mother took up the invitation.

"Thank you for inviting us, son," Constance said after kissing Erwin on the cheek at the door. "I'm sorry your father couldn't make it."

Erwin shrugged it off. He really hadn't expected his dad to cave in and try to be sociable, and he'd already explained to Kuchel and Isabel that he was still recovering and might not be able to attend. "It's fine, Mother. Go and help yourself to some wine, won't you? Kuchel and Isabel went out to pick up some fruit for a salad she wants to make for dessert, but they should be back soon."

"All right. Can I help you with anything, Erwy?"

"Er, you can avoid calling me that in front of our companions," he said with a little chuckle.

"Ah, roger that." Constance smirked at him. "No baby boy nicknames in front of your future inlaws. I think I can manage that."

Erwin almost reminded her again that he and Levi hadn't confirmed that there would be a wedding yet, but he gave up. His mother was possibly one of the most stubborn people alive, and he himself couldn't accept the possibility that Levi wouldn't be his husband someday.

No sooner did he set the table than his guests returned with their groceries. Isabel called out brightly as she came through the door. "Hey, big bro's boyfriend! We're back!"

"Isabel, how many times have I asked you to be more polite?" Kuchel scolded, closing the door behind her.

"I _am_ being polite," insisted the little redhead. "I didn't call him any names, did I?"

"Welcome back," chuckled Erwin, coming out of the dining room to greet them. "My mother is here. Mom, this is Mrs. Ackerman and her daughter Isabel."

"Pleasure to meet you both," greeted Constance, shaking Kuchel's free hand with a smile. "Can I help you ladies with any of that?"

"I think we've got it, ma'am," said Isabel. "But thanks! Wow, I can see where Mr. Smith gets his looks from!"

Kuchel smiled with approval at Isabel's words. "Yes, there's a strong family resemblance."

"I was about to say the same of you," confessed Constance, looking the other woman over with interest. "You hardly look old enough to have a son Levi's age. I would have mistaken you for his sister!"

"Oh, I get that all the time," said Kuchel lightly. "You should see how angry Levi gets when his military friends ask if I'm single, too."

"He's a protective sort, isn't he? Here, I insist. Let me take one of those bags."

Kuchel handed over one of her grocery bags to the other women, and the three of them started chatting together while they went into Erwin's kitchen. Left behind, Erwin scratched his head and he wondered what he'd set himself up for.

* * *

Dinner went over rather well. Erwin was far from a gourmet chef, but he pulled off a decent recipe of baked chicken and steamed vegetables. They all steered the conversation carefully away from Levi's situation as they ate, but inevitably, their thoughts all turned to the captain before dessert was served.

"I want to make a toast," Erwin decided softly, letting his meal settle a bit before retrieving the fruit salad Kuchel had made. He raised his glass, and he looked at each of his guests in turn. "Here's to the men and women caught up in this conflict, and to Levi."

Kuchel raised her glass, and she swallowed with emotion. "To my sweet, irritable boy and his fellow soldiers. May they all return home to us safe and sound."

"Here, here," agreed Constance, also raising her glass.

"I'll drink to that," said Isabel. She frowned at her glass of chocolate milk. "Though I feel kind of left out. Are you _sure_ I can't have like...half a glass of wine? Just for the toast?"

"No darling, you can't have any wine," Kuchel admonished. "I'm not contributing to a minor, especially when we're still in the probation period of your adoption. They'll take you away from me if I make one wrong move."

Isabel sighed, and she clinked her glass against the adults'. "It was worth a shot."

Kuchel winked at her, and she had a sip of her wine. Her eyes widened as something occurred to her. "Oh, Erwin! That reminds me: I have something for you. Excuse me for a moment."

Erwin watched in puzzlement as Levi's mother got up and left the dinner table. She came back a few moments later with something square in shape that she'd fetched from her bag, and she handed it over to him. It was a framed photo of Levi in full, formal uniform regalia. The frame was silver, with wings at the top right and left corners.

"This was taken when he first got promoted to Captain," explained Kuchel. "I had two copies of it, so I thought you should have the spare one."

Erwin examined the picture, staring at the familiar, sculpted features of his lover. Levi's face was expressionless in the image, clean-shaven with a scout cap on his head. He looked so gorgeous in it, and Erwin's throat tightened. Would he ever get to kiss those lips again? Touch that narrow jaw line? Brush his thumbs over that pert little nose?

"Thank you," he said when he felt it was safe enough to speak again. "It's a wonderful gift, Mrs. Ackerman."

"Kuchel," she corrected gently, and then she shrugged. "Or 'Mom', if you prefer. Not that I'm trying to step on any toes. You wouldn't mind if he called me 'Mom', would you Constance?"

"Not at all," assured Erwin's mother. "In fact, I'm going to insist Levi do the same with me, when he comes back. Our boys are meant to be together."

"So cheesy," mumbled Isabel, and she covered her mouth on a burp.

Erwin smiled at the girl, and some of his tension faded. Both women approved of his relationship with Levi, and they approved of each other. That made up a little for his father's lack of support. He told himself that Levi _would_ make it back, and they _would_ be legally wed sooner or later. Erwin unconsciously reached up to run his finger over the smooth stone set in the bolo tie Levi had given him. He just had to have faith and be patient.

* * *

-To be continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> End of Chapter Recap:
> 
> Erwin: "God, I miss Levi."
> 
> Levi: "God, I miss Erwin."
> 
> Hanji: "God, I miss....oh wait, I'm not with anyone in this fanfic. All right, I miss my lab, then."
> 
> Moblit: "I miss being your boyfriend in that other fic the mun wrote."
> 
> Levi: "I don't need proper nutrition. I'm humanity's strongest. *cough, hack*
> 
> Hanji: "Humanity's strongest what? Phlegm chucker? Lay your ass down and have some soup, shorty."
> 
> Eren: "Captain, Captain, Captain, Captain!"
> 
> Mikasa: "Is that the only word you know?"
> 
> Armin: "Here we go again."
> 
> Levi: "I don't care about those three brats. Uh, so where are there parents? Do they need a couple of new ones? Erwin likes kids..."
> 
> Constance: "Why is it that nearly every time we see each other, we're eating, Erwin?"
> 
> Erwin: *blinks* "Damn, you're right."


	17. Chapter 16

Just like Gisele said, she brought Eren by the next day to see Levi. She waited further back, keeping Eren within sight without crowding him. At first, Levi tried to ignore the boy. He didn't know how to react to seeing that face again, and admittedly, he didn't want to get attached. There wasn't a damned thing he could do for the kid while he was stuck behind this fence. In the captain's mind, Eren and the rest of the trio were better off staying away from this compound.

If Gisele really wanted them to be safe, she would take them somewhere else, away from a POW camp. Sooner or later, odds were the Sinarian forces would try to raid this place and liberate the men and women being held here. People were going to die when that happened, both soldier and civilian alike. He supposed Gisele couldn't move locations right now, though...not while Shiganshina was under tight martial law. The southern occupancy likely wasn't letting anyone without proper authorization in or out of the territory.

Levi felt Eren's eyes on him as he hoisted a slab of rock into his wheelbarrow. He sighed, and he turned a little to look at the boy. Eren stood at the fence with his little hands clutching at the mesh, staring unblinkingly at Levi as if he were a legend come to life.

"You shouldn't be coming here, brat," warned Levi. He unconsciously scratched his chin, and he realized he must look more like himself than he had yesterday. They'd finally given him the razor they'd promised, and Levi was clean-shaven again. Hanji also gave his hair a trim.

"It's dangerous around here," Levi went on when Eren didn't say anything. He switched to the Marian dialect, guessing Eren probably didn't understand Sinarian. "Scat, kid. You're gonna get hurt."

"Captain?" Eren said with perfect, yet accented, Sinarian.

Levi froze in the act of turning away again. It sounded strange to hear Eren speak in that tiny voice, with that accent. It was undoubtedly Eren Jaeger's voice, though. He turned again to look at the child, and he found Eren digging through the pockets of his fluffy coat. Levi watched curiously as the boy produced a yellow apple. Eren looked at it for a second, and then he pressed it against the fence. Seeing that it wouldn't fit through the mesh, the boy looked up assessingly at the height of the fence.

"What are you doing?" Levi asked, pulling his work gloves off to approach.

"Giving you a present."

Then Eren slipped the apple back into his pocket and grabbed onto the fence.

"Eren, don't you dare try to climb that fence," snapped Levi, alarmed. "Oi, get down from there, you little shit! Do you want to end up fried? You reach the top of that thing and you'll end up kid crisp."

Eren stopped climbing, and he got back down. "But I wanna give you an apple."

"I get enough food, so don't worry about me."

Eren frowned. "Nuh-uh. You're white and shrinking."

Levi blinked at him, and he impulsively ran a hand over his torso. Okay, so maybe his ribs were getting a little prominent. He also spent most of his outdoor time in the shadow of the quarry, so he didn't get much sunlight. Still, he didn't think he looked _that_ bad.

"Unless you've got a decent throwing arm or can cut that apple into quarters, forget it," Levi stated. His mouth twitched at that familiar look of stubborn determination on that tanned, dirt-smudged little face. "Eat that apple yourself, kid. You're still growing."

"But I want you to have it, Mr. Captain!"

Levi started to admonish him again, but then Eren pulled the apple out, backed up and chucked it up into the air. It fell short of clearing the fence, and the boy swore in a creepily adult way before fetching it to try again.

"Kid, you'll never get that apple over that fence," sighed Levi.

Regardless, Eren kept trying. Levi shook his head and resumed working before any of the guards could get onto him. He watched from the corner of his eye as the little boy wore himself out trying to get the fruit over the fence to him, and he felt a twinge of pity when Eren gave a little sob of frustration and plopped down in the dirt, sulking.

"Stubborn as a Jaeger," muttered Levi under his breath.

Gisele approached the fence at that moment, seeing how upset her young charge was. She squatted down beside Eren and spoke to him softly. When the kid hiccoughed and explained what the matter was, Gisele took the apple from him and kissed him on the head.

"Now what's _she_ doing?" wondered Levi as the young woman started waving at a guard patrolling the catwalk overhead. Levi looked up, shielding his eyes from the glint of sunlight coming through the cloud cover. His jaw slackened a little bit when he saw the guard Gisele was signaling too. "I'll be damned."

Mike Zacharius. Levi thought there was a chance he was in this compound somewhere after Hanji mentioned seeing someone of his description, but this was the first time Levi had seen him with his own eyes. It was definitely Mike. The big blond was dressed in insulated combat gear and his cap shadowed his eyes, but Levi would recognize that profile anywhere. Mike leaned over to ask Gisele what she was doing so close to the fence, and she explained the situation to him.

Mike looked down at Levi from his perch after the woman told him she and Eren wanted to give Levi an apple. Their eyes met, and Levi swore he saw some puzzled recognition in the blond's face. It wasn't like Eren's reaction to seeing him the first time; there was no instant recognition as if it had just been yesterday the last time they saw one another, but Levi was obviously at least vaguely familiar to Mike. Whether that was because he too had detained some snatches of memory from their past life, or if it was because Mike had descriptions and photos of all the prisoners, Levi couldn't guess.

"I can't give prisoners un-rationed food from the outside," Mike finally said in Marian.

"What harm can it do?" insisted Gisele. "Eren picked this apple himself. It's very important to him that the captain have it, sir. Please."

_Watch it, girl. You're gonna get yourself in trouble if you keep arguing with the guards._

Although Levi had to admit, if she was going to pick a guard to appeal to, Mike was probably the better choice. If there was even some shadow of memory in that giant's blond skull, he might just show some compassion. Levi wasn't counting on it, but then Mike surprised him. He dropped the folding ladder down from the guard tower to the other side of the fence, there for the purpose of quick egress from the compound in case of an emergency.

"Wait there," ordered Mike, and he stepped out onto the ladder and climbed down. He took the apple from the girl, examined it for a moment and then nodded. "Don't make a habit of this."

"Thank you for your kindness," Gisele said with relief, stroking Eren's hair. The boy had crowded close to her, and he watched intently as Mike climbed back up the ladder, retracted it and stepped back out onto the catwalk.

"You'd better give it to him!" shouted Eren.

Mike smirked and gave a little snort. He looked down at Levi, hesitated briefly, and then dropped the apple down to him. Levi caught it, and he gave Mike a brief nod of thanks. The blond nodded back.

"Finish it fast and get back to work," advised Mike.

Levi bit into the apple, and his gaze went back to Eren thoughtfully. The kid still had brass balls, he had to give him credit.

* * *

Erwin got the phone call from his mother close to midnight. At first, he wasn't going to answer the phone. Then he saw Constance's name on the caller ID, and he thought better of ignoring it. His first concern was that something had happened to his father, but that wasn't the case. As soon as he groggily answered his phone, his mother's excited voice piped up.

"Erwin, are you awake?"

"I am now," he answered. "Is everything all right, Mom?"

"They found him!"

Erwin sat bolt upright in the bed. "Levi? They've found out where Levi is?"

"Yes. He's in Shiganshina, in a concentration camp. Someone tipped Pixis off, and Levi's name is listed amongst the prisoners there. So is your friend Hanji's. They're alive, Erwin."

Erwin shut his eyes and took a shaken breath. Alive. He just might get to see his lover again. "Is the government going to negotiate a prisoner exchange?"

"From what I understand, negotiations have been going back and forth already," answered Constance. "They're going to release some of the detainees this week, though I don't think Levi is going to be one of them. I don't want to upset you, but they're likely going to hold onto him longer than most of the other prisoners. He's too valuable a bargaining chip."

Erwin swore softly. "Are there any plans to liberate the place?"

"Nothing so far," she sighed, "but that could change. They're hoping to avoid hostilities and do this peacefully. The president is talking about withdrawing from Maria, little by little. We can't pull out all at once, but they've started recalling soldiers. It won't happen overnight, but by next year, our part in this conflict could be finished."

"How will Levi get home if they won't release him and our people won't fight to get him out of there?" demanded Erwin. "What's going to happen to him?"

"I wish I had an answer to that, Erwin. For now, just be thankful that Levi is still alive. It may even be possible for you to send a letter to him, now that we know where he is. Pixis tells me they do allow prisoners to get mail, though they go through it first before giving it to the recipient."

"So I take it I would have to keep the subject matter discreet," guessed Erwin.

"Exactly. If they think someone is sending any kind of encoded message that might result in a threat to their operation, they'll intercept it. Just use your common sense while writing to him, and don't mention any details about what you witnessed while there. I can get an address for you by tomorrow."

"Thank you, Mother. At least I know he's alive."

"My pleasure, son. Just keep the faith and try to be patient. I'll do whatever I can to help bring Levi home."

* * *

Levi was surprised when one of the guards brought him a letter from overseas. He stared at the envelope—which had already been opened up. Someone had read the contents, but that wasn't a big shock to him. What really stunned him was the familiar, flowing handwriting on the envelope.

"Holy shit," breathed Levi, hardly able to believe it.

"What?" Hanji had just finished doctoring up a scrape Levi had earned on his arm while working, and she stood up to look at the envelope in the captain's hand. "Erwin? Oh, wow! He found out where you are!"

Levi felt like kicking himself. He knew some people sent out letters to loved ones from within this camp, and he could have done the same himself. The letter Erwin sent hadn't been delivered directly to the POW camp, of course. It had been sent to a P.O. box and then delivered by the postal service from there. Levi opened up the envelope, wishing he'd thought to try and send word to Erwin and at least let the man know he was alive and relatively safe.

"I'm such an idiot," muttered Levi. "Should have asked for postal privileges weeks ago."

"Well, you've been focused on surviving and taking care of your men," excused Hanji with a smile. "Don't be so hard on yourself, shrimp. I'm not really surprised that Erwin found a way to contact you. He's one smart cookie. So, what does he say?"

"Give me a chance to fucking read it," snapped Levi. His eyes scanned the letter, and he devoured every word of it.

_"Dearest Levi,_

_I can only hope that this letter reaches you. Thanks to a friend, I was able to find out what became of you and how I could send this. It was terrible to hear the news of what happened, and I pray you and your people are being treated humanely. With any luck, some agreement can be eventually reached and you'll be released from the place you're in. When that day comes, I shall be waiting to welcome you home again with open arms. Not a day goes by that you aren't in my thoughts. Please say hello to Hanji and Moblit for me. The book is going well despite my distraction, and it should be in print by next month. I'll have a special copy just for you waiting for when you return home._

_All of my love,_

_Erwin."_

"He...he says hi to you and Moblit," Levi said, throat tightening. He wasn't prepared for his reaction to getting a letter from his lover. It felt like a fist had hit him right in the gut. He wanted to be done with this war, wanted to be home again. He wanted the cheesy movie nights, the family dinners, the fucking picket fence...he wanted a life with Erwin. It was never more poignant a desire than it was right now. Levi had been kidding himself, thinking if he could just focus on the present and keep himself occupied, he would be all right.

Hanji squeezed his shoulders supportively. "I have paper and a pen, if you want to write him back."

Levi sighed. He did want to write Erwin back, but what could he talk about? The hazards of hefting rock? The fine dining? The miserable cold at night? He'd been in this encampment for almost three months, now. He lived each day like an automation, and the only thing that broke up his dull routine were the visits at the fence from Eren...and sometimes Armin and Mikasa, too. He had to admit those brats did tend to brighten his day a little, and they always brought him a piece of fruit as a snack.

Suddenly, Levi had an idea of what he could talk about in his return letter to Erwin. "Yeah, give me the pen and paper, Hanji. I should try and write him back."

* * *

It was late spring now, and Erwin finally got a return letter from Levi in the mail. He opened it up eagerly, noting the tea colored stain on the envelope. It looked like the letter hadn't been handled very well, but at least it would still be legible. He opened it up to read Levi's sharp font, smiling for the first time in days.

_"Dear Erwin,_

_Can't believe you figured out how to send me that letter. You're one determined bastard. I don't know if this will get back to you or not, but I'll keep my fingers crossed. They don't treat us too bad here. A few people have been released, or at least, that's what they tell us. I don't ask too many questions. I just take each day as it comes. There's this kid that's always coming by from the outside to watch me work at the fence. He does it almost every day. Loud mouth, green eyes, brown hair. Remind you of anyone? Oh, and sometimes he has a brainy little blond kid and a girl with my same last name with him. They're all between six and seven years old. At first they annoyed me, but they've kind of grown on me. They're orphans of this war, and they live in occupied Shiganshina."_

Erwin paused, and he lifted his eyes from the letter. "Eren, Mikasa and Armin?" said Erwin to himself in a mystified tone. That was unexpected, but fate sometimes worked in mysterious ways. It seemed oddly fitting that Eren Jaeger would gravitate toward Levi.

 _"There's also a Marian soldier here that would remind you of someone,"_ Erwin read on, _"Big blond guy with a sensitive nose. He doesn't say much. We don't really talk, but we've established a sort of rapport. Not a bad guy."_

Erwin rubbed the bridge of his nose, hardly believing the coincidence. So, Mike was reborn as well, and apparently, he was a southern Marian soldier. It seemed like Levi was a magnet, drawing them all together again whether he meant to or not. Calming his excitement, Erwin resumed reading what remained of the letter.

_"Hanji and Moblit are both doing fine. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that they'll be released soon, because they've brought their own doctors into the camp. Seems like the guy in charge likes Hanji, so we can hope. Take care of yourself, blondie. Wait for me, like you promised._

_Love,_

_Levi."_

Erwin sighed, and he read over the letter again. He felt like his letter had been so brief in comparison, but he hadn't even been confident that it would make it to its destination. Besides, Levi had a lot more going on right now than Erwin did. He wondered if his lover had really crossed paths with Mike, or if Erwin was just misunderstanding. There was no mistaking who Levi was talking about when he mentioned the three kids.

Erwin couldn't wait to begin writing Levi back. He wanted him to know that he got his return letter, and if nothing else, he wanted to give him words of encouragement and reassurance. Now that Erwin knew he could send mail back and forth to Levi, he decided to contact the captain's mother to let her know the mailing address. She'd been worried sick about her son since hearing the news that he was in a detainment camp, but grateful that he was still alive. Perhaps Isabel would like to write a letter to Levi, as well.

* * *

"No! Hey, get your hands off me! Levi... _Levi_!"

"Cut it out, shitty-glasses," barked Levi as Hanji struggled against the hold of the soldiers. "They're letting you go."

Hanji evidently didn't _want_ to go, and she ignored Moblit's please for her to calm down. "I'm not leaving my friend! I'm not leaving my captain! If Levi stays, so do I!"

Levi cursed, predicting that this was only going to get worse if he didn't intervene. If she kept it up, they really _would_ keep her detained and probably put her into lockup as a trouble-maker. "Let me talk to her," he requested of Mike, who was standing guard at the gate leading out of the compound. "I'm not gonna try to escape, all right? I just want to talk some sense into her."

Mike looked between him and the struggling doctor, and he nodded with a little grunt. He pulled out a pair of cuffs. "You'll have to put these on."

Levi put his wrists behind his back, and he allowed the bigger man to fasten the restraints to them. Mike told his fellow guards to let Levi through, and they parted for him. "Oi, listen to me, Hanji," Levi called out, getting as close to her as he could. "You've got a chance to get back home. I want you to take it, all right? Don't be an idiot. Get the fuck out of here and quit making a scene before you get yourself in real trouble."

His words seemed to reach her, and her struggles eased up. Breathing heavily, she glanced at the two men trying to escort her through the gate, and then she pulled free of them. She threw her arms around Levi and hugged him, nearly choking him in the process. He couldn't do much more than endure it, with his wrists bound behind his back.

"We'll come back for you," promised the doctor huskily. "I'm not leaving you to rot in this place."

Levi believed her. "Just don't steal any more tanks. Take care of yourself and Berner, all right?"

She heaved a shaken sigh, and she nodded.

"Hanji, hold up," Levi said, thinking of something. "In the village there are these three kids...orphans. I want you to check on 'em, for me."

"You mean that little boy that always comes to see you and his friends?" she guessed, wiping at her eyes.

"Yeah. I don't know if there's anything we can do, but maybe you can pull some strings to get them transport to Sina under asylum status."

Hanji was sufficiently distracted from her angst by his request. "You want me to try and take three kids back to Sina with me? That is, assuming I can even get leave to go home."

"I just want you to find out what the options are. We don't have time to talk about it, okay? Just check on them for me, if you can."

"I'll do my best, Levi," she sighed. Hanji looked over Levi's shoulder at Mike, waiting behind him at the gate. A little frown graced her lips, and she shook her head. "I swear I know that guy from somewhere else."

"Don't stand there pondering it, idiot," advised Levi. "Get going with Moblit before they change their minds. You can write to me once you've settled in somewhere and keep me updated."

"All right, I'm going," she yelped as he gave her a nudge in the ass with his knee. "Just take care of yourself, shorty. Mind that temper of yours, eat right and don't make yourself sick."

"Thanks, Mom," he said sarcastically. "I'll be fine."

Hanji finally stopped resisting her escort, and she caught up with Moblit. Looking behind her at Levi every few steps, she exited the enclosure with the rest of the handful of captives they were releasing back to Sinarian custody. Levi watched until she and Moblit were out of sight, and then he turned back and walked through the gate. Mike removed his handcuffs, and Levi returned to the tent designated as his sleeping area.

As he lay down on his cot to get a little bit of rest before it was time to get back to work in the quarry, Levi thought about how Hanji might react if and when she saw Eren and his friends. She might have a sense of recognition and she might not, but if Eren could remember him, then odds were, he would remember Hanji as well. Levi couldn't really tell if the boy had recognized Mike or not, but Eren might not have gotten a good enough look at his face when he saw him. Levi supposed it didn't matter, because Mike wasn't in a position to do anything for the kids even if he wanted to. It was important for Levi to keep in mind that in this life, they weren't allies.

* * *

Hanji did try to get into the village to look for the kids Levi had mentioned, but she and the others were immediately rounded up, driven to a hill and exchanged for Marian prisoners. She asked both General Ulrich and Commander Moss about it. Ulrich naturally had no more say in the matter, and Moss informed her that she was to immediately return to base with the others. From there, she might be sent back out in another platoon or she might be sent home; it was undecided.

Hanji climbed into the helicopter transport awaiting them, and she looked back in the direction she'd come from. She couldn't see Shiganshina from this distance, but her thoughts went to Levi and the other remaining POW's in that camp.

"I'm sorry, tiny grump," she sighed. "I did try."

But she wasn't finished. She wasn't on a flight back home yet, and she intended to pull every string she could to get Levi out of there and find those kids he'd mentioned. The names certainly rang a bell, but she couldn't put a finger on where she'd heard them before.

* * *

_There they are again. Shit. I guess that means Hanji didn't get to them like I asked._

It was day thirteen since they released Hanji, Moblit and the others from the concentration camp. The mail stopped running, or at least it was delayed. Levi hadn't received any further letters from Erwin, and as far as he knew, the batch of mail that was meant to go out hadn't been picked up yet.

As he chipped away at the next stone, he wondered exactly what he was doing this quarry digging for. He supposed they were using the harvested materials to make something, but he had no idea what that was. He felt those three pairs of eyes on him from the other side of the fence, and he sighed, putting down his pickaxe.

"This would go a hell of a lot faster with machinery," muttered Levi. Of course, they did have some machinery on site, but no prisoners were allowed to use it.

It was actually a little warm out today, for once. He wiped sweat from his forehead, glancing sidelong at the children watching him. It was a little creepy, actually. Levi took a sip of water from his canteen, and he studied the trio of kids. "Why do you brats keep coming here? There's got to be something more interesting for you to do than watch me dig all day. Go play or something, you creepy little shits."

"We brought you food, sir," Armin said, rifling through a pouch at his belt. Of the three of them, he was of course the most well-spoken. Mikasa had a slight lisp from a missing baby tooth, and Eren was still recovering the ability to speak at all. According to Gisele, he spoke more to Levi than he did to anyone else.

Levi glanced around as the kids stepped closer to the fence. "Better not," he advised. "Mike's not around to get it from you, and if the guards see you trying to toss food over the fence, they might not take well to it."

"It's all cut up," explained Eren with a toothy smile up at the captain. "See? We can push it through the fence!"

Levi cocked his head a little, and he walked over to the fence. Armin had produced a storage container and opened it. Inside were pear and apple slices, thin enough to easily fit through the links in the fence.

"Nice thinking," approved Levi. He took off his work gloves, and he used a little of his water to rinse his hands off. He accepted the slices the kids offered him through the fence, and he took a seat on a nearby rock. He was due for a break, anyhow. "So where's Gisele? She's usually here watching over you kids when you drop by."

The children looked at each other, and the distress on their young faces was plain to see. Levi stopped chewing his fruit, staring at each of them in turn. "What happened?"

"They took Gisele away," informed Mikasa softly.

The breeze ruffled her dark hair, and Levi noticed for the first time how unkempt and tangled it was. In fact, all three of them were looking pretty scruffy and dirty. Upon closer inspection, Levi could see scrapes on their little hands. Eren's knuckles were skinned.

"What do you mean?" he demanded, leaning closer to the fence and lowering his voice. "Who took her away?"

"Soldier men," obliged Eren. He scowled, and the green of his eyes brightened to a yellow-ish hue. "Mean ones."

Levi narrowed his eyes. "Were they wearing uniforms like the soldiers here behind the fence?"

Armin shook his head. "No sir. They had black ones on. They weren't like the men here."

"They started moving everyone," said Mikasa. "They made them get into these big trucks."

Levi frowned. "Did they speak like me?" He said a few words in Sinarian as an example.

"Nuh-uh." Eren shook his head. "They were from here."

"And how did you three manage to avoid getting rounded up with the rest of the town?"

"Gisele told us to hide when they showed up," explained Armin. "They've got almost everyone, now. What are we supposed to do, Mr. Captain?"

Levi's mind started to race. It sounded like more Marian military forces from the south. Probably special operatives. If they were rounding up the citizens of Shiganshina and the mail services were no longer running...

Levi saw a cloud of dust far in the distance, coming from the road leading further up into the mountains. He stood up, clutched the wire fence and peered hard at it. There was a line of transport vehicles. He heard a ruckus off to the east, and he saw that one of the gates over on that side of the compound had been opened. More vehicles were moving through it, and upon hopping up onto the stone he'd been sitting on, Levi could see that there was a line of prisoners being marched towards those vehicles.

"They're relocating," he whispered.

That could mean a few things. They could be abandoning this territory due to an incoming threat. They could be relocating with the intention of razing this town and the concentration camp. They could be transporting people for the purpose of slave labor.

When Levi saw one of the newcomer soldier's and recognized the uniform, he got further confirmation. The more extreme military groups were there, now. In addition, Levi could hear the distant sound of fighter jets approaching. He looked around at the skyline, but he couldn't see them yet. The mountains distorted the sound of the engines, making it hard to tell which direction they were coming from. He couldn't say if they were Sinarian or Marian jets, but either way, he had a gut feeling that this was about to be the last place a group of kids could safely be.

"Kids, get out of here," Levi said firmly.

"Where are we s'posed to go?" Eren asked.

"Go into those woods and hunker down," Levi said, pointing. "If you can find a cave or a rock overhang to get under, do it."

Armin and Mikasa started to go, but Eren wouldn't budge. Levi glared at the boy, who was clinging to the fence for dear life while his two friends tried to pull him away. Levi could hear a guard shouting orders to him from somewhere behind him.

"Eren Jaeger," Levi thundered, expressing one of those quick, sudden bursts of temper that had so often scared the piss out of people, "that is a _direct_ _order_ , you shitty brat. I _will_ kick the shit out of you through this fence, if I have to."

Eren gave a start, and something from the past got shaken loose inside of him in response to Levi's command. His eyes widened, he let go of the fence, and he planted one little fist against his chest facing upwards, while the other he put behind his back. Under another circumstance, it might have looked both cute and ridiculous for this small boy to give a foreign prisoner a strange, sharp salute. Levi wasn't laughing, though. He nodded at the boy, and he watched as Eren finally turned away with the other two kids.

He thought he might have at least gotten the trio out of immediate harm's way, but just as the guard came within ten feet of Levi, the captain got his first glimpse of the aircrafts that were making the noise he'd heard earlier. A formation of fighter jets came screaming overhead, closing in on the compound at high speed. Levi looked up, and he immediately recognized the markings on them.

"They're ours," he confirmed.

The brief feeling of elation that stirred within him was quickly replaced by dread when he saw missiles streaking from the jets in the rear of the formation, straight for the towers. He didn't find the move all that surprising, seeing as they had to take out certain strategic points to overcome opposition on the ground, but it was alarming. The guard that had been charging for Levi threw himself down for cover as explosions went off and chunks of mortar flew. Levi covered his head and ducked behind a pile of quarry stone, also shielding himself from debris. He saw the nearest tower to the north start to topple and fall outwardly, toward the other side of the fence.

And in the shadow of that falling tower were those three shitty brats Levi was trying to urge to safety.

Levi couldn't say whether it was some unexpected paternal instinct that drove him or memories of a time when he both mentored and protected those kids. Whatever was to blame for it, he got a powerful surge of adrenaline. He was on the move before he knew it, his worn boots kicking up pebbles and dust as he sprinted for the falling tower. The captain leaped onto the leaning structure, scrambling over it as it toppled the fence and fell steadily towards the three small figures below.

Somehow by the grace of angels, Levi jumped down, rolled and shoved all three kids out of the way before the tower collapsed completely. He saw it coming down on him, and he rolled again, unable to get to his feet fast enough. He heard screaming, felt something slam into him just as he was climbing to his feet. It knocked him down, and then there was a crushing weight pressing down on him. Levi tried to lift up, but he collapsed again. He was pinned. He tried to move his legs, but they were too deep under the rubble for him to move them more than a fraction. By some miracle, he didn't think anything was broken. As he took a breath, he revised that opinion. He might have a fractured rib.

"Captain! Captain!"

Levi heard the high-pitched shrieking, and he struggled to lift his head. Blood dripped into his left eye from a cut he'd gained somewhere on his scalp. With a grunt, Levi wiped at it, and he looked up to see three little figures running toward him through the dust.

"Damn," he sputtered, finding it hard to draw breath. He tried again to wriggle out from underneath the weight pressing down on him. It was no good. He felt the rubble shift, and there was further pressure on his right ankle. Without someone clearing away the topmost layers, he would only manage to make things collapse further and cause greater damage in his struggles.

"Mr. Captain," Armin called, skidding to a halt behind Eren. The latter was already trying to pull some of the debris off of Levi, and Mikasa was helping him.

"Don't bother," coughed Levi. "Get out of here, brats! It isn't safe."

They weren't listening. Eren was sobbing grossly, digging in the mess until his hands were skinned and raw. Mikasa was practicing more caution, but she was following his lead. Only Armin stood aside, and the boy's dirt-smudged face bore the expression of calculation on it as his pale blue eyes assessed the situation.

"We're too small," Armin called to his friends. "Guys, we can't lift all that!"

"We have to try!" screamed Eren. Under his breath, the child began to chant: "No more...no more...not again!"

At once, Levi understood the meaning behind Eren Jaeger's tearful words. This wouldn't be the first time the kid had tried to rescue an adult trapped beneath structural wreckage. Levi heaved a tired sigh. Even without the threat of titans in this new world they'd been reborn into, history had an ironic way of repeating itself, at times.

"Eren, stop," ordered Levi as clearly as he could. "The blond kid is right; you can't dig me out of this, and those jets are going to circle back soon for another strike. You need to get out of the target radius. Get to safety."

Not only that, but Levi could hear gunfire rattling off in the distance. They must have dropped paratroopers down, and their was now a ground battle happening around the perimeter. Maybe the air forces wouldn't bombard the area further, since their own people have moved in after the first wave. Still, a stray bullet could easily find one of these kids, and Levi wasn't prepared to watch that happen.

"Can't leave you," cried Eren, straining to shift a piece of slab.

"Armin, Mikasa, knock him out if you have to," ordered Levi. "Get the little idiot and yourselves away from here. It's not up for negotiation!"

Armin had picked up a shard of rock, and he looked as though he was about to follow Levi's advice. Eren, however, spotted something that gave the boy pause. He pointed with excitement toward the collapsed fence. "Look! That guy could help!"

Levi strained and twisted as much as he could, craning his neck to try and see who the boy was pointing at. He saw a tall, familiar figure approaching in the dust. It was Mike Zacharius. For a moment, Levi was hopeful. Then he heard the struggle intensifying within the compound, and he considered his situation. Mike wasn't exactly his enemy, but neither was he his ally, he reminded himself. Even if the big man was willing to try and dig him out of this mess, time was short and the brats were in real danger.

Eren ran off toward Mike despite Levi's warning to stay away from the perimeter. Levi watched the child grab Mike's sleeve and tug on it, completely ignoring the gun in the soldier's other hand. Eren was evidently convinced that Mike would help, either because the man had given Levi fruit and veggies Eren brought for him, or because the kid recognized him from the past life.

Levi tried one more time to free himself, but his strength gave out and he collapsed again. A shadow fell over him, and he lifted his head again to stare up at the towering figure of his former comrade. Mike stared down at him wordlessly for a moment, his hand on the handle of his gun. He looked as though he was considering drawing it and putting Levi out of his misery, but then he glanced around at the children. Armin had added his please to Eren's, and Mikasa had stepped between the trapped captain and the Marian soldier warily, having noticed his hesitation.

"You can't just leave him!" Eren demanded, tugging at Mike's sleeve again.

Mike tugged his sleeve out of the boy's grip, and he stared down at Levi again. An expression came over his rugged countenance; subtle confusion and indecision blended together. Finally, he nodded, put his gun in the holster and started hoisting away rubble.

"Stay out of the way, kids," Mike grunted when the children tried to help him.

Levi agreed wholeheartedly. "Let the man work, and don't get crushed."

Eren was the most reluctant to stand back and leave it all to someone else, but Mikasa and Armin held him back. Mike worked tirelessly and carefully to clear away the top layers, but he was only one man, and somewhere within the compound, an explosive went off. Levi grimaced. No, there wasn't enough time.

"Forget about it," he coughed. Mike either didn't hear him, or he was too stubborn to quit immediately. "Mike," called Levi, using the man's given name for the first time since meeting him in this life. The blond paused to look down at him.

"There's no time," urged Levi. "Nice effort, but you'll never dig me out of here before shit hits the fan even worse. Get the brats away to shelter. Do what you feel you've gotta do after that, but I'm asking you to do me this one favor, first. Make sure those kids are safe before you join the fight."

Mike considered Levi's request, and then he looked at the children. Eren was shaking his head, having heard Levi's request to leave him where he was. The boy started to cry again, and he tried to dodge away when Mike reached for him. Mike had three times Eren's stride and reach, though. He scooped the child up before Eren could evade him for more than two seconds, and he flung him over his shoulder.

"No! Not leaving...Captain!"

Eren pounded at Mike's back and shoulder with small fists, but with his tiny size, he might as well have been a kitten swatting at a bear. Mike wasted no time in scooping up Mikasa next, hoisting him over the other shoulder. He then—amazingly—swept Armin up as well. Eren he had to keep one arm around, due to the kid's incessant squirming and struggling. Armin and Mikasa, however, clung to the blond soldier and didn't put up a fight.

Levi watched as Mike took off towards town with all three kids, heading away from the combat zone. He watched Eren reaching out for him, heard the kid screaming at the top of his lungs. Levi shut his eyes, folded an arm on the ground and dropped his forehead to it.

"Sorry to put you through this again, brat," he mumbled. He hadn't been there to see it when the Jaeger house collapsed and Eren's mother got pinned, and then eaten by the grinning titan. Eren had described it to him once, though. Levi had no idea how Eren's parents had died in this life, but it was no damned wonder the kid stopped talking for a while.

Maybe he would just rest for a while. Levi was very tired.

* * *

-To be continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the cliffhanger! I was going to do the humorous recaps at the end as I usually do, but this chapter was so emotionally charged, I just wasn't feeling the humor. Maybe next chapter!


	18. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy weekend! Beware, this chapter might cause cavities. Be sure to brush after reading.

Hanji would have argued that the missiles and air ballistics weren't necessary, but she wasn't the one in charge. At least they'd only deployed one sweep with the jets, and then they sent in ground forces for the cleanup and to escort what prisoners hadn't yet been moved. She'd had a feeling that they were going to try and relocate everyone in the POW camp after the most recent prisoner exchange. They would have been foolish not to, given that the location of the compound was no longer unknown. She'd been half afraid that her military wouldn't strike soon enough, and they'd arrive to find the place deserted, with no sign of Levi or the other prisoners.

It seemed they'd arrived in the middle of the Marian evacuation of the territory, and each time something went up in flames, Hanji tensed and prayed that Levi wasn't near the structure or vehicle. At least the Sinarian attack forces were only blasting strategic targets that the opposition might use against them. They avoided hitting any dwelling structures this time, in order to cut down on collateral damage. Maybe they would actually manage to rescue more people than they injured or killed, this time.

Leaning over to watch out the window of the medical transport chopper, she sat stiff as a corpse, unable to tear her eyes off what was happening below on the ground. Hails of red-streaked gunfire came from all sides. Small figures fell to the ground, both Marian and Sinarian alike, mortally wounded. Dust billowed up from the fallen towers, and vehicles that had been trying to leave with passengers came to a halt outside the gates. More soldiers poured out of those vehicles to join the fight against the strike teams.

Hanji shook her head when Moblit, sitting beside her, asked how things were looking.

"Bleak," she answered. "Very bleak. We're going to have our work cut out for us, seeing to the wounded. Better prepare yourself, Moblit."

* * *

Because the Marians holding Shiganshina hadn't moved quite fast enough and had their manpower cut down by half, the Sinarian forces took the town back. Most of the remaining detainees in the concentration camp were recovered safely, as the majority of them had been loaded up onto transport and were on their way out of the area when the strike happened. Some didn't make it though, and Levi was still to be accounted for.

"Shit, where are you, runt?" Hanji uttered softly after having it confirmed that there were no more surviving wounded being brought into the medical tent for care. She asked around to see if anyone had found Levi's body or dog tags. Nobody could confirm it. He wasn't on any of the transports. Some of the captured Marian soldiers recognized his name when asked about him, but none of them so far had given any information concerning his possible whereabouts. Either they didn't know, or they wouldn't say.

At the end of her rope after asking the tenth captured soldier for information that might lead to finding Levi, Hanji came up with an ominous idea. "Okay, start strapping them down to tables one by one. Time to try waterboarding."

"Hanji!" cried Moblit, eyes wide with alarm. "You can't be serious!"

"Oh, but I am," assured Hanji with a mad glint in her russet eyes. "I promised Levi that I would come back for him, and I'm keeping that promise even if it means gathering up his body parts to bring home!"

She rounded on the line of Marian captives. "Now, I'm going to ask you people one, last time. Where is Captain Levi Ackerman?"

"Captain Ackerman?" called a masculine voice from the back of the pen.

Hanji and Moblit looked to see a dusty blond head towering over most of the others. She recognized Mike from before. He must have just been brought in. Hanji pushed her way through the crowd to him, and she stopped in her tracks when she saw that surrounding the man were three small children. They were hauntingly familiar to her, and somehow, she knew that these kids must be the ones Levi had asked her to look for.

"What's this?" Hanji asked of the two guards flanking Zacharius and the kids.

"We found him in town," explained the guard on the left. "He was with the kids in a bomb shelter. He surrendered to us without a fight."

"I see." Hanji looked up at Mike again. "What did you say about the captain?"

"I know where he is," answered Mike, speaking Marian. "Could be too late for him, though."

"He's hurt!" cried the little blond boy.

"He got smushed!" yelled the brunet boy with the tearful green eyes.

"It was bad," added the girl child with the black hair, softly.

Hanji shot an alarmed look at Mike, and she was about to ask him for clarification when the green-eyed boy grabbed her hand in both of his. "Please, Miss Hanji! You've gotta help! Captain's in trouble!"

Taken aback that this child knew her name, Hanji stared at him briefly. She looked at Mike, and then at his guard escort. "Take his cuffs off. I want him to lead me to the captain. Moblit, stay here with these kids. No, wait...come with us. I might need you if Levi's hurt."

"Can we come too?" asked the boy that still had hold of Hanji's hand.

"No my dear, I'm afraid not. Don't worry; we'll find Captain Levi. You kids will be taken care of, okay?"

"I wanna see captain!"

Hanji squatted down before the loud, insistent child. She felt the urge to smile at him, and she took a wild guess. "You're Eren, right?"

He nodded. "Uh-huh."

"Well Eren, if you want to help Captain Levi, you can set up one of the medical cots for him so that he has a comfy bed to lie down in when we get back. Deal?"

The boy hesitated, and his lower lip quivered. "You promise you'll get him?"

Hanji swallowed. Maybe she was making too many promises she couldn't really keep. Levi was out there injured somewhere though, and the clock was ticking. The longer she sat here arguing with this kid, the less chance she had of finding Levi alive. "I promise. Just be a good boy, do as your told and wait here."

* * *

When she saw him, Hanji's heart plummeted clear to her toes. Levi was unmoving and buried up to the shoulder blades under the shattered guard tower. Hanji might have run right past him without seeing him, he was so covered in dust. Mike led them straight to him though, and the doctor shook her head in denial upon seeing how still her friend was.

"Levi! Oh, no...no!"

She went to her knees before the fallen soldier, and she felt along Levi's neck with trembling fingers. At first, she thought they'd lost him. Hanji was so shaken up that she almost missed the faint flutter of his pulse, but then she detected it, and she waved Moblit over.

"He's still alive! Bring the oxygen, Moblit. You men, start clearing this rubble away, and be _careful_!"

Mike started to help, and one of the Sinarian soldiers told him to back off and stay put.

"Let him fucking help," snapped Hanji. "The more, the merrier!"

They did as she said, and Hanji worked over Levi with Moblit while Mike and the four Garrison army soldiers concentrated on freeing the captain.

"Levi? Can you hear me?" Hanji wiped the blood away from his forehead, and she thought she saw his eyelids flutter a little as the oxygen mask strapped to his face aided his breathing. He didn't answer. Hanji bit her lip, and she pushed back the temptation to try and pull him out too soon. He could have internal bleeding, but working too fast might cause further collapse of the debris and crush him.

"Hold on, Levi," urged Hanji. She took one of his cool, limp hands in hers, and she squeezed it. She then got on the radio to order more medical assistance and muscle to help extract Levi alive.

* * *

Erwin got the news from his mother. They'd finally moved in on the concentration camp and liberated it, but Levi was reported to be badly injured in the process. Constance couldn't get the details on _how_ bad yet, but she promised Erwin she would get any details she could from her associates. Receiving this information did nothing to help Erwin relax or sleep. As he waited to hear more, he scoured the internet for any leaks he could find, and he had Nile do the same. He avoided telling Levi's mother about it yet, because he knew she would have questions he couldn't answer. Erwin didn't know if Levi had been shot, stabbed, burned or what.

He got his answer to that when Hanji contacted him over the phone, two days after he heard about the liberation of Shiganshina. Erwin's heart was slamming in his chest as he saw Hanji's name on the ID and answered the phone so hastily that he nearly dropped it in his koi pond.

"Hanji? Hanji?"

"That's my name, don't wear it out," she replied. "Hello, Erwin. I'm sorry it's been so long. I have some news about Levi, but you might want to sit down, first."

"I'm already sitting, and I know about the raid on Shiganshina," he informed her. His chest was tight, and he braced himself for the worst. "My mother was able to find out some things through her old military contacts, but they couldn't tell her what happened to Levi. Is he alive?"

"Yes, he's alive," confirmed Hanji. "I wasn't expecting you to have already gotten news about it!"

"How bad is he?" demanded Erwin. "What happened to him? Do I need to fly to Maria?"

"Calm down," advised the doctor. "I'm sorry I scared you so bad, Erwin. I just thought you were completely in the dark, so I wanted to prepare you. Levi is in stable condition. He's in a military hospital over here, in recovery. Long story short, a guard tower basically fell on him when the attack happened. He fractured a couple of ribs, had a little internal bleeding and a collapsed lung, but we got him out and got him the medical attention he needed in time. I think he's going to be all right."

Erwin forgot that he was already sitting, and he rocked back in his chair so far that he almost toppled it. "Thank God. What happens now?"

"Well, next we wait for him to be strong enough to travel, and he'll be coming home. I spoke with our superiors, and Levi is getting awarded a Purple Heart. You should be proud of him, Erwin. He saved the lives of three children, you know."

"Did he?" Erwin was able to smile at last. Somehow, that news didn't surprise him. Levi had a habit in the past of getting injured trying to protect young people. "I'm confused, though. I thought that Purple Hearts were awarded to soldiers that get injured in battle, from gunshot wounds or an instrument of war?"

"An enemy guard tower fell on him," stated Hanji dryly. "I'd say that classifies as an 'instrument of war', wouldn't you?"

"Er, I see your point," conceded Erwin.

"Besides, it wasn't just the guard tower or him saving those kids from being crushed by it. Levi's made quite a reputation for himself in this war. He's done a lot of notable things, and the Purple Heart won't be the only medal he's awarded for his service, I'm sure."

"I see." Erwin's heart swelled with love and admiration, having no doubt of Levi's heroic endeavors. "Where will he be transported to when he's fit to travel back to Sina?"

"The base at Ehrmich, most likely," answered Hanji. "Unless he wants to wait here until he's fully recovered, he'll be moved to the hospital on base there. I doubt he'll want to stay in Maria longer than necessary, though."

"Is he awake?" pressed Erwin. "Can I speak with him?"

"Sorry big guy, Levi's still in kind of a stupor," she sighed. "I promise, as soon as he's coherent enough to hold a conversation, I'll get back in touch with you so that you two can talk. For now, just give the news to his family that he's doing well and he'll be coming home as soon as he can."

Erwin had forgotten all about Kuchel and Isabel in his excitement over hearing this news. "I certainly will, Hanji. Thank you for taking care of Levi. I hope you'll soon be returning home, as well."

"We'll see what happens with that. They might keep me on active duty here for a while longer, until enough of our forces have been pulled out. Medical personnel are still needed. Anyways, you take care, Erwin! I'm looking forward to reading your latest book when it comes out!"

"If you haven't returned home by then, I'll find a way to ship you a copy," promised Erwin. "Until next time, Hanji."

* * *

"Well, hello there, sleepyhead."

Levi frowned, cracking his eyes the rest of the way open to find a blurred face coming into focus above him. Hanji was hovering over him, checking his vitals. He had no idea how long he'd been out or what happened to him after the tower fell on him.

"Where are we?" His mouth was so dry it felt like sandpaper, and his throat was sore.

"We're at the hub base," explained Hanji, "in neutral territory, at the base hospital. You've been drifting in and out of consciousness for the past two days, shrimp. I was starting to wonder if you were ever going to snap fully out of it!"

Levi tried to swallow. "Any water?"

"Sure. They just took out your breathing tube, so you're probably parched. Here, I'll adjust your bed for you." She raised the head of his hospital bed, and then she offered him a large hospital straw cup full of water. "Sip it slowly, Levi. Baby steps."

He did as she advised, wincing as he took a steadying breath. "Feels like someone went after my lungs with a vacuum cleaner," Levi noted between swallows.

"That's not actually too far off the mark. Your right lung collapsed after all of that rubble pinned you down. You've also got a couple of fractured ribs and a sprained ankle, but you're mending nicely."

Levi had another sip of his water, reminding himself not to guzzle it. Damn, he was thirsty. "So what happened?"

Hanji explained everything to him. Apparently General Ulrich left the concentration camp a couple of days before the strike happened, so he wasn't in Sinarian custody. Mike was, though, and Hanji had already pleaded his case for his assistance with freeing Levi and helping the three orphans. He was to be released back to his people by the end of the week. As for the brat trio, they were currently at an orphanage not far from the base. Seeing as none of them had any surviving family and it was difficult to house orphans during this time, they might be living there for a while.

"What about the chick that was taking care of them?" Levi asked upon hearing the news. "Gisele was her name. According to the kids, she got rounded up with the rest of the town and loaded onto transport. Did they stop any of those transport vehicles? Maybe she can be brought to the trio."

Hanji grimaced. "I hate to tell you this, Levi, but that might be a pipe dream. We intercepted those transport vehicles, but something went wrong. Several of the civilians were already dead on board of one of them. I don't know if this Gisele person was one of them."

"How were they killed?"

"Shot." Hanji shrugged. "It seems some of them resisted the southern soldiers that took them away, and things must have gotten ugly. The townsfolk on the other intercepted transports were all right though, so maybe she got out safe."

"Have any photo ID's of the survivors been filed away?" asked Levi, his mind rapidly coming out of its haze. "Or of the dead?"

Hanji nodded. "I can get those files for you, but you need to rest, first. You should have something to eat too. You lost some weight in that camp."

"I'll eat and rest after I've confirmed whether Gisele was in either group," said Levi stubbornly. "It's important."

Hanji cocked her head curiously, her gaze sharpening behind her glasses. "Let me guess: it's because of those three kids, isn't it?"

Levi neither confirmed or denied it verbally, but Hanji could evidently read the answer in his gaze. "What is it about that trio, Levi? I thought children generally annoyed you. You're the kind of guy that wouldn't put much thought to it, once a child is safe. What's so special about these ones?"

He sighed. Perhaps one day, he could sit down and have a heart-to-heart with Hanji and explain everything to her. Right now, things were just too fucked up and he didn't have the mental energy to deal with lengthy explanations.

"Let's just say I owe them one, all right? They gave me food at the fence sometimes, so the least I can do is try and reunite them with their caregiver. Get me those files, would you?"

"All right, Levi. Don't get yourself worked into a state." Hanji spread her hands, and she turned to go. She looked back over her shoulder at him as she reached the door. "I know there's something you're not telling me though, midget."

"Are you gonna go or not?" snapped Levi.

"Going."

* * *

Levi flipped through the files of the confirmed deceased first, deciding he would rather rule out Gisele's death before going through the thicker collection of survivor files. He got to the very end of the binder, and just when he was about to breathe easier, he saw her image. Levi went still, and his brows pinched. There she was, with her face still in death and her arms folded over her chest. It looked like she'd been shot twice, once in the heart and once in the lung. He could only hope that her death had been a quick one.

Levi sighed and rubbed his forehead, closing the book.

"Is she in there?" pressed Hanji.

He nodded. "Last one. That's her. Fuck, she was still practically just a kid herself."

Hanji reached out to pat him on the shoulder. "I'm sorry, Levi. You tried."

"Trying isn't doing," he grumbled. "Those brats don't have anyone, now."

"Hmm." Hanji sipped at a cup of coffee, watching him sidelong.

"What 'hmm'?" pushed Levi, annoyed as always when she got that sly look without telling him what it was about.

"Are you _sure_ they don't have anyone, Levi?" Hanji smiled at him, and she poked the tip of his nose lightly with a fingertip. "I think they at least have a surly little captain that's developed an attachment to them."

"Tch. So what are you saying? I should try to take them home with me?"

She shrugged.

"Look, even if I wanted to raise three brats—which I don't—I have no fucking room for them at my place."

"Weren't you talking about moving to Mitras, becoming an instructor and living with Erwin?" reminded Hanji.

"His place isn't any bigger than mine," argued Levi, "and I can't just show up on his doorstep with three kids in tow and expect him to be okay with taking them in."

"There _is_ this thing known as 'communication', Levi." Hanji chuckled. "Why don't you try it, sometime? Run it by him. Tell him what happened. From what you've told me, he's very eager to have you move in with him. I can't see him turning those kids away if they're part of the package."

"So you're suggesting I blackmail him into it." Levi rolled his eyes. "Great plan, four-eyes. That's a really good way to start a new life with someone."

"Or, you could just talk to him about it as I suggested and see what he has to say," she persisted. "What harm could it do, Levi? If you care about those kids enough to put your life on the line for them like you did, then why not consider the possibility? Maybe you could just foster them until you find a suitable family for them...one that you approve of. Ever think of that?"

Her idea gave him pause. While Levi sincerely doubted he was parent material, he knew someone else that was. She had enough room at her place to shelter three little kids, at least for a while. Hanji's incessant suggestions had nudged the gears of his imagination, and before he knew it, Levi was actually taking the idea seriously.

_I'd better slow down. It takes a lot of fucking planning, work and responsibility to take in a foster kid. With those three being foreigners, there would be a shit-ton of paperwork, too. They'd have to learn how to speak Sinarian to attend public school and it could be years before anything can get finalized, even if they've got no family here to claim them. I'd be looking at a long, drawn-out process whether I go for permanent custody myself or try to find them a family, and I can't guarantee the system wouldn't split them up._

Levi kept reasoning with himself as Hanji quietly waited, and finally, his head started to ache from all of his conflicting thoughts and emotions. "I'm not in a good enough fucking mindset to think about shit like this right now," he announced at last, wincing as he rubbed his temples.

"I'm sorry, Levi. I just know you care about those kids, and I was just sound boarding with you." Hanji put aside her coffee mug and she dug out her phone. "Here, why don't I call Erwin up so you can say 'hello' to him? He's probably on pins and needles, waiting to hear from you. I think I scared the shit out of him when I first called to give him the news that you're in the hospital. I must have made it sound like you were dead, at first."

"Leave it to you," grumbled Levi, unsurprised. He was eager to speak with his lover again though, so he didn't give her too much hell over it. "Yeah, call him up."

* * *

Erwin was thrilled to get the chance to speak with Levi again. He had many questions for him, but he tried to keep it to a minimal because he knew his lover was still in recovery.

"Thank God you contacted me," he said over the phone. "Hanji legitimately had me thinking you were dead, when she first contacted me about your situation."

"Tch, figures," grumbled Levi. "What did four-eyes say to give you that impression?"

"She told me to sit down." Erwin chuckled. "I suppose she was just trying to get me to brace myself for the news that you'll be coming home, but my mind immediately went to the worst places."

"Well, remind me to give her a kick in the ass, as soon as I can put some weight on both feet again."

Erwin frowned. "What do you mean? Did something happen to one of your legs?"

"I've got a twisted foot on top of the fractured rib," explained Levi. "She didn't tell you that?"

"No, she left that part out...but don't be too angry with her, Levi. I think Hanji was just excited about giving me the news, and she only relayed your most pressing injuries. How do you feel? A collapsed lung is nothing to downplay."

"I feel okay, I guess." There was a shrug in Levi's voice. "Chest hurts, foot hurts, head hurts from the injury I got on it from a piece of flying rock, but I'm on the mend and ready to get the hell out of this country as soon as they'll let me. I've had enough of this shit, Erwin."

Erwin sighed, sympathetic with his boyfriend's plight. "You've certainly been through enough. Hanji told me that you'll be awarded a Purple Heart, and that you saved three small children."

"Yeah, I wrote you about those kids, too. Did you ever get my return letter? The mail stopped running a little while after I sent it."

"Yes, in fact, I've put the letter away for safe-keeping in my desk." Erwin smirked ruefully. "Call me sentimental if you will, but I don't intend to ever throw it away."

"Sap," accused Levi with a hint of fondness. "What did you think about what I wrote in it?"

"About the children?" Erwin scratched his head. "You were a bit vague, but if I'm not mistaken, you were trying to tell me that they're the reincarnation of three previous cadets from our past life. Is that right?"

"Yeah. Eren, Armin and Mikasa. Mike's around too, if you didn't catch that hint."

"I thought that was what you meant." Erwin frowned. "Mike is with the southern Marian army?"

"Yeah, or at least he was," confirmed Levi. "He was one of the guards in the POW camp. He got captured when our forces liberated the place, but since he helped me out, helped those kids and didn't kill anyone in the firefight, he's gonna be released before long. According to Hanji, she's spoken with him and he's just as sick of this war as we are. She said he's talking about retiring from the military or even defecting and getting a visa to come to Sina. Maybe we could give him a place to stay for a while, if he does that."

"I would be more than willing," agreed Erwin. "Tell me, does he or any of the children have any memory of our previous lives?"

"Of all of them, Eren's the only one as far as I can tell," explained Levi. "The other two kids seem to just follow his lead. I think Mike has an inkling like Hanji, but no full recollection. How the hell Eren remembers me when the others don't is anyone's guess. His previous caregiver said the brat talks about titans, too."

"Interesting." Erwin thought back on how much Eren Jaeger used to look up to Levi, and he smiled. "Although, it comes as no great surprise to me that he would remember you, if nothing else. That boy looked up at you as his hero, Levi."

Levi went silent for such a long time that Erwin thought they'd lost their connection. "Levi? Are you still there?"

"Yeah, I'm here." The captain sighed. "Look, Erwin; on the subject of the brat pack, I've got something to talk to you about."

"All right. What is it?"

Levi sighed again, and he seemed to drag his words out as if they pained him a little. "You like kids, right?"

"Of course, though not as fodder, as I treated them in my previous life." Erwin still suffered pangs of guilt over the lives he'd thrown away for the cause in those days. Such young lives, with so much promise. Snuffed out as titan food for the betterment of humanity. He tried to make up for the monster he'd once been by donating to children's charities, but logically, he couldn't keep blaming himself in this life for actions he'd had to take in the previous one.

"Don't start that shit," Levi demanded, inadvertently reading Erwin's thoughts. "We all did what we had to do, and we aren't living that life anymore. So anyhow, about the kids. They've got no family. I can't just leave them here, with this country in the state it's in. They should have some kind of chance in life, right? The opportunity to be kids for a change. Wouldn't you agree?"

"Well, yes. All children should have the chance to have as normal a life as possible, and the chance to be children. Heaven knows, those three never got that opportunity in the former life."

"I'm glad you agree," said Levi. "I can get them to Sina under asylum as refugees, but they'll need somewhere to live. This is where I need your support, blondie. I'm sure my mom could take them in; they could have my old bedroom. Problem is I don't want to dump another burden on her shoulders for too long, so it would have to be temporary."

"I understand your logic," Erwin replied, "although I doubt Kuchel would see it as a burden, as big-hearted as she is."

"She's already got a full plate with her job and Isabel," explained Levi. "You're right; she wouldn't see it that way, but I know she's got limits even if she won't admit to them. That's where we come in. I...shit, I don't know if this could even be do-able, but what would you think about fostering those three for a while, until we could find them a good family willing to take all three of them in?"

Erwin was very surprised to hear such a suggestion come from Levi. He'd toyed with the idea of adopting a child one day in the future, should things work out as he hoped and Levi became his spouse. He hadn't thought seriously on the possibility though, because Levi definitely wasn't into children, and Erwin still had to convince him to take the plunge and marry him. The thought of one day having a family of his own was an attractive fantasy, one that Erwin had never dared set his hopes too high on.

However, this was the Shiganshina trio they were talking about. Considering that, it wasn't all that far-fetched for Levi to harbor some attachment to them. The man had spent most of his career post the 104th squad's recruitment guiding those kids; training them to survive, coming to their rescue when they were in mortal danger, advising them when they had life lessons to learn. Now that Erwin thought of it, Levi was already experienced in being a sort of father figure to the group. He would have vehemently denied it if anyone accused Levi of loving them, and he would have tried to pass off his diligence as part of his duty. Erwin knew better, and Hanji had as well.

"Levi, have you taken time to think about this?" Erwin asked cautiously. "I understand your motivation behind it, but I don't want you to commit to something you don't truly want."

"Yeah, I've thought about it," confirmed Levi. "I need to lock it in before I can chicken out, but before I can do that, I need your consent and support. I'm not taking care of these brats on my own, and if you aren't willing to be a part of this, I'll find another solution. I know it's a lot to ask, especially since we haven't even made arrangements for me to move in with you, yet."

"And are you going to do that?" pressed Erwin, hope rising. "Move in with me, that is? The last time we spoke of it, you talked about living on the base here for a while, first. Have you reconsidered that plan?"

Levi sighed. "Shit. All right, I'm going to go for it and just move in with you, after I get home and have everything in order. I'll need to get a moving truck, too. I don't have a lot of shit and most of it can go in your attic, but it's still too much for me to fit in my car. I've also got to put in for the transfer and apply for an instructor position at your base, and I can't guarantee I'll get the job. I might be unemployed for a while. Is that okay by you?"

"Levi, I don't care if you never work another day of your life," Erwin assured him. "I just want to be with you."

"So you're willing to take me and the brats in, even if the latter is only for a little while?"

"Of course." Erwin smiled, and he wondered what the trio looked like at such a young age. He would have expected to run into them as teenagers, if at all. He never thought they'd be adolescents at this point in life. "Besides, perhaps this can be my redemption for sins of the past. I probably owe those kids."

"Don't start with that again," warned Levi. "I can't take anymore of your guilt, Erwin. Put it all behind you and look to the damned future, all right? If we're gonna do this, there needs to be some planning. We'll have a shit-load of paperwork to deal with, along with home inspections and other legal crap. It's not going to be easy. Plus, your place is small. It'll be a tight fit for us and three brats."

"You don't need to test my resolve," soothed Erwin. "We can get around that. My couch converts into a bed large enough to fit all three of them. It will do for a while. I also have a small office that was probably intended as a spare room. I could move the bookshelf into the living room, store the office furniture in the attic and find a bunk bed and a loft bed in the classified ads. We can turn it into a bedroom, and perhaps later, if things go well, we can move to a larger place."

"Oi, slow down," advised Levi. "That sounds pretty long term, and this isn't supposed to be a permanent arrangement with these kids. We're just looking after them until we can find someone suitable to adopt them."

Erwin smirked. He knew better, even if Levi didn't. There was no way his lover would be able to give those kids up to someone else once they got settled in. There were too much of a connection, and Levi would never trust anyone else enough to raise them, unless it was his own mother. The former Scout commander kept those thoughts to himself, however. Levi was infamously stubborn, and if he got pushed too hard, he'd go back on his plan just to prove something.

"Let's just play it by ear, then," suggested Erwin smoothly. "As you've said: there's still a lot of arrangements to be made before we've locked anything in. For now, let's just focus on getting you and the children safely home."

"Right." There was some relief in Levi's voice. "One thing at a time. To be honest, I was a little nervous about bringing this up to you. I'm glad you're on board with it. Just so you know, I wasn't trying to make it sound like a package deal you've got to agree to. I'd move in with you even if you said 'no' to taking the kids. I want to make that clear to you."

"I understand," assured Erwin. "It wouldn't be your style to do something like that."

"And you're sure you're okay with this?"

Erwin chuckled. "Levi, these aren't complete strangers to us. I know these children, even if they don't remember me. I assume they're more or less the same in personality as they were in the previous life?"

"Yeah, just...younger and brattier," answered Levi. "Kind of cute, I guess."

"That's high praise indeed, coming from a man with little tolerance for young ones," teased Erwin.

"Well, I know these 'young ones', so I can tolerate them better than most. Stop grinning, you bastard."

"How do you know if I'm grinning or not?" demanded Erwin, though he was indeed smiling. "You can't see my face."

"I can hear it in your voice." Levi grunted as if in pain, and his tone became a little strained. "I just hope I'm not making a mistake trying to set this up."

"I fail to see the mistake in trying to give three orphaned children a stable home and life," encouraged Erwin gently. "Are you in pain, love?"

"Yeah, I'm starting to feel it," confirmed Levi. "Guess I'd better take them up on those pills they offered me before. I just didn't want to be high on meds while trying to talk to you, especially about something so important."

"I see." Erwin sobered, hating to think of Levi suffering on his account. "Then let's say goodnight, Levi. Take something for the pain and get plenty of rest. We can talk again tomorrow, if you're up for it. Do you have a replacement phone yet?"

"Not yet, no. They're supposed to issue one to me in a day or two. My laptop got blown up with everything else I owned when they attacked us, too. I need to get another one. I can call you from Hanji's phone tomorrow or ask them to bring one to me. I've got your number memorized."

"Then I'll be sure to keep my phone with me at all times tomorrow, so that I don't miss your call," promised Erwin. "Sleep well, Levi. I look forward to seeing you and meeting the trio again. Keep me updated."

"Sure." Levi's tone changed, and he almost sounded shy. "I...look forward to seeing you again too, blondie."

"Good to know." Erwin smiled.

"Hey, Erwin...before we hang up, I just thought of something you said earlier."

"Which is?" pressed the blond.

"If you convert your office into a bedroom for the brats, then where will you work?" asked Levi.

"Honestly, I hardly even use that office," Erwin explained. "I think I've only sat at that desk to write a few times, back before I traded in my PC for a laptop. Now I do most of my writing out on my patio by the koi pond, provided the temperature is favorable. Otherwise I sit on the couch or the armchair and watch television while writing."

"Oh. Makes sense. I've got to say, your furniture is pretty damned comfortable. As long as it's not putting you out, I guess we can work on your idea once we get everything arranged."

"That sounds like a plan." Erwin hesitated for a moment, briefly worried that he might get accused of being a sap if he spoke his feelings plainly. It was a foolish thing to be concerned with, because it had been said between them before, and Levi was in fact the first of the two of them to speak the words.

Shaking his head at his own insecurity, Erwin spoke again. "I love you, Levi. Please cooperate with your doctors and come home to me soon."

"Love you too," answered Levi, "and I will. Goodnight, Erwin."

The writer/journalist hung up the phone reluctantly, and he laid back down with a sigh. God, he missed Levi. He missed his snarky wit, he missed his rare, sweet little smiles, his scent, the way Levi fit against him when they cuddled, and he even missed the captain's shit jokes.

Closing his eyes, Erwin pictured his lover in his mind. There was more to be missed, obviously. Levi's sensual skills in the bedroom, for example. Nobody had ever rocked Erwin's world the way Levi did. Just thinking about it made Erwin hard. If he'd ever known Levi could fuck like that, he doubted he would have been able to hold back the way he did. No matter who was on top, Levi made their sexual encounters something that would be forever branded into Erwin's memory.

Without consciously realizing he was doing it, Erwin slid his hands over his body. He kept thinking of Levi as he did so, imagining it was the captain's strong, battle calloused small hands on him, rather than his own. Erwin's right hand slipped under the waistband of his boxer briefs as he thought of Levi. He pictured the captain's pale, nude body above him and beneath him. He thought of the perfect, sweet pink of Levi's nipples, and the way they so quickly tightened to an erect state when teased. He imagined the captain's husky moans and little purrs of arousal in his ears. The way color bloomed in Levi's cheeks when he was getting fucked or pleasured, the way that perfect, pale body gyrated with muscular synchronization, the way Levi breathed his name in his ear when they were entwined.

Erwin started jerking off furiously, his breath huffing with his efforts. He didn't spare time to grab some lube to enhance the experience; he just needed to get off and think of Levi while he was doing it. His throat worked as he swallowed, and his broad lips parted to gasp Levi's name. His fisted hand moved faster, squeezed harder, and Erwin considered finding that lube to finger himself. He was already too close, though. Hearing Levi's voice again, knowing he was alive and save and would soon be with him...there really was no room for self-foreplay.

"Levi," groaned Erwin.

It only took a few moments longer for him to tense up, buck his hips and make a mess of himself and part of his bed sheets. He didn't even care about the mess. He turned his head to one side, and he panted softly in release. Erwin wondered how often—if ever—Levi had the opportunity to fantasize about him in the same way while imprisoned in the concentration camp. The thought of his lover jerking off while thinking of him brought a smile to Erwin's lips, and he fell into pleasant dreams filled with domestic life with Levi and a three-pack of miniature cadets at their feet.

* * *

-To be continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> End of Chapter Recap:
> 
> Hanji: "Hey! This isn't going to be much of a rescue operation if you blow up the people you're trying to save! Careful with those explosives, you trigger-happy nincompoops!"
> 
> Moblit: "You're going off the deep end! You can't torture these people, Hanji!"
> 
> Hanji: "The hell I can't! One of them has to know where Captain Levi is, and I'm not going to stop until they—"
> 
> Mike: *Raises hand* "I know where he is."
> 
> Eren: "He went smushy!"
> 
> Hanji: "Great. I told Levi I'd bring him home whole, not as a grumpy pancake."
> 
> Levi: *Is smushed*
> 
> Hanji: "Hey, I've got an idea! Why don't you adopt those three cuties, Levi?"
> 
> Levi: "Because I hate kids."
> 
> Eren, Armin and Mikasa: "Hi, Mr. Captain! You feel better?"
> 
> Levi: "...except these three..."
> 
> Erwin: "I have a great idea. Let's have the family we were never able to have in our past life. Let's get a house with a picket fence, adopt the trio, get a dog and live happily ever after."
> 
> Levi: "You've been watching too many Hallmark movies while I've been away."


	19. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Levi returns home with three little war survivors in tow. With the help of his mother and Erwin, he gets everything in order and he moves in with his lover sooner than originally anticipated. He and Erwin try to adjust to the responsibility of watching over small children, while at the same time planning their future together

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you everyone for the feedback!

After spending four days in recovery, he was given his paperwork to fill out, some basic civilian clothing, a new phone and the nod to return home. He was also granted custody of Eren, Mikasa and Armin. It was more difficult to keep up with the little terrors than he'd anticipated, especially since he was wearing a brace on his left foot and bindings over his ribs beneath his shirt. Hanji and Moblit had accompanied him to the airport, but they weren't permitted past the checkpoint. They said their goodbyes, wished Levi luck and then left him alone with these three small people that he had no idea how to handle.

"Eren, get back here! Right now, brat. That wasn't a suggestion."

Eren turned around at Levi's sharp command, and he hesitated. He pointed up at the poster he'd broken out of line to go and look at. "But I was looking at—"

"I don't care," interrupted the captain. "One condition of my being allowed to take you three with me is that I don't fucking lose you before we even get on the plane. Over here. Now."

"You said a naughty word!" Armin gasped, staring up at Levi with huge blue eyes. The child was holding onto the hem of Levi's button-up shirt, being the only one of the three of them that hadn't strayed from his side yet.

"I'm gonna say a lot _more_ 'naughty words' if you kids don't stick close and behave," warned Levi, raising a brow at him. Eren returned to his side, and Levi bent over with a grunt to pick him up, grabbing him under the armpits. It hurt like hell, but he lifted the boy up and sat him on top of his shoulders, figuring Eren might like that and it could keep him from running off again.

"Wow, I can see _everything_ from up here, Captain!" enthused Eren. His fingers curled into Levi's hair and tugged.

"Don't pull," admonished Levi with a wince. He didn't say it as sharply as he might have, due to the fact that Eren had just managed to make him feel somewhat tall for the first time in his life. He looked around upon realizing that Mikasa was no longer at his side. "Shit! Where did Mikasa go, now?"

"She's over there, Mr. Captain," Armin obliged, pointing.

Levi followed the blond child's indication with his eyes, and he saw Mikasa standing at the window, looking out at the airplane they were getting ready to board. He cursed under his breath. He didn't want to lose his place in line, and he was going to lose his voice if he kept yelling.

"Armin, go and get her for me," Levi said after some thought. "Come right back with her, okay?"

"Yes sir!"

Armin let go of Levi's shirt and took off to retrieve his wayward friend. Levi heaved a sigh, and he was grateful that at least one of the brats had it together enough to behave. Moments later, Armin and Mikasa returned to his side, holding hands. Levi reached down, and he took Armin's hand in his left one, and Mikasa's in his right.

"No more wandering, any of you," Levi stated.

He wasn't letting go of them, this time. The line moved again, and the captain limped forward with all three kids firmly in tow. As they slowly progressed to the ticket collector, Levi pondered his situation. Now he was starting to regret all the nasty looks he'd shot at parents with loud children. How many times had he gritted his teeth and barely held back his critique when a mother or father couldn't seem to bring their kids in line? Too many, he reckoned, and now he was getting a taste of how difficult it was to mind small children in public, crowded situations.

_Must be karma. I'm getting payback for thinking it should be easy to control kids in public. Erwin would have a field day with this. Fuck, I miss Mom. I'll bet she'd know how to handle this bunch, if she were here._

Of course, Levi wasn't aware that to onlookers, he was doing just fine. He was too focused on keeping the group together to notice the whispers about what a good father he was, taking care of three little ones and keeping them quiet and relatively behaved. Even if he'd detected the comments and approving looks, he probably wouldn't have given a damn. All he wanted to do was get home, deliver the kids to his mother and start making arrangements to move in with Erwin.

* * *

"Captain, what's she saying?"

Levi glanced at the little boy seated beside him. He kept forgetting that the only one of the trio that knew any Sinarian dialect was Armin. "She's asking if we want refreshment. Eren, stop kicking the seat in front of you. Mikasa, sit down and buckle your safety belt. Armin—"

The little blond boy looked up curiously from the coloring book Hanji had given him, attentive as always.

"Uh, keep coloring," finished Levi, realizing Armin hadn't done anything wrong. Seated by the window, the boy was keeping himself occupied with crayons and looking out said window once in a while. Maybe Levi should have changed the seating arrangement and put Eren or Mikasa by the window.

"Hey, Armin...how about you change seats with Mikasa before we take off?"

"Why?" he asked absently, scribbling purple into the bowtie of the cartoon dog he was working on.

"So she can look out the window better," explained Levi. "You're busy with coloring, right? You can trade with her."

"Oh." Armin looked at Mikasa, who had been standing in her seat a moment ago so she could see out the window better. "I guess that's okay. Here, Mika, let's trade seats!"

Eren of course would not budge from Levi's side even if the captain tried, so he didn't even consider trying to get the titan brat to take the window seat. As the other two kids exchanged spots, the stewardess spoke to Levi again.

"Sir, did you want to order a beverage?"

Levi tore his eyes off the kids and looked up at her, having forgotten she was standing there waiting for him. He nearly asked for some alcohol, but he thought better of it. He was already on medication for pain management and he had three ankle-biters to look after. "Yeah. I'll take a ginger ale. Do you have any chocolate milk?" He switched to the Marian dialect to address the children. "Hey kids, you like chocolate milk, right?"

"Yeah!" responded Eren with enthusiasm.

"I like chocolate," supplied Armin.

"It's okay," said Mikasa with a shrug.

"Chocolate milk, then...if you have it," Levi finished to the stewardess.

"We do," she assured with a warm smile at the children. "I'll bring your drinks to you once we've leveled off, sir. Please don't hesitate to call for service if you need anything."

"Thanks." Levi grimaced a little as the plane started moving and the vibrations made pain flare up in his ribs. Fortunately, he was a fast healer. He'd probably set the process back a little with his piggy-back stunt with Eren earlier, though. He figured once they were up in the air, he'd take another pain pill. He was trying to space them out more though, on account of needing his mind sharp enough to watch over the brat trio.

"All right, here we go," Levi informed the kids as the craft made it to the runway. "Better chew that gum I gave you guys. It'll help with the ear popping."

The kids rifled through their pockets for the wrapped sticks of chewing gum Levi had divvied out to them, and they dutifully popped them into their mouths. Armin curled up a little, tucking his legs up on his chair and wrapping his arms around them as if preparing for a crash position. Eren and Mikasa seemed more excited than afraid of flying for the first time. Levi reached across Eren's seat to squeeze Armin's shoulder, some paternal instinct taking over briefly.

"Oi, it's gonna be okay, Armin. I'm right here, and this is a good plane. Once we're in the air, you'll hardly notice we're flying."

His words seemed to comfort the boy a little, but Armin still hid his face in his hands as the plane made it onto the runway and started picking up speed. Within moments, they lifted off and climbed in altitude. Eren and Mikasa both stared out the window with awe. Eren forgot about the gum he'd been chewing on, and it tumbled out of his slack mouth. Levi sighed, took the wrapper out of the boy's hand and used it to pick up the half-chewed confection from Eren's lap. Satisfied that it hadn't stuck to the kid's clothing, Levi sat back and tried to relax. Once they leveled out, the flight attendants started passing out beverages that people had ordered before takeoff. Levi thanked the lady that brought his and the kids' drinks to them, and he sipped at his absently.

The captain announced that people could now use their electronics, and Levi took advantage of the on board telephone to pay for a call to Erwin. At first he thought the man wasn't going to pick up, since it would be showing up as an unknown number. Erwin did pick up after the third ring, however.

"Hey, it's me," Levi said, glancing at the kids sitting next to him to see how they were holding up. Armin seemed much calmer now, and he was sipping at his chocolate milk while avoiding looking out the window. Eren was fooling with the entertainment touch screen set in the back of the seat in front of him, and Mikasa had started filling out a word puzzle in the game book Levi bought for them.

"Levi, how are things going?" Erwin said on the other line. "Have you boarded your flight yet?"

"Yeah, we're up in the air now," answered the captain. "We'll have that two hour layover I told you about, and we should make it to Ehrmich by six-fifteen pm. Are you still planning on coming along with Mom to pick us up?"

"Absolutely," promised Erwin. "I'll leave for her place around four. I'll be waiting at your gate when you arrive."

"Good." They probably could have all squeezed into his mother's car, but it would have been a pretty tight fit. Levi figured the kids could ride with Kuchel, and he'd ride with Erwin. That was assuming the trio behaved themselves enough for Levi to leave them in his mom's hands. Armin knew a few words in Sinarian, but the only word Eren seemed to know was 'Captain'. Levi couldn't expect them to follow his mother's instructions if they couldn't understand them, and Kuchel didn't speak any Marian. If the kids got cranky from traveling by the time they arrived, he'd probably have Isabel ride with Erwin so that he could keep them in line on the way home.

With that thought came the realization that Levi might have a hard time enrolling them in school. How could they get an education if they couldn't comprehend the lessons?

"Damn," muttered Levi.

"What is it?" asked Erwin.

"I just realized I might have to home school these brats for a while, or hire someone that speaks Marian fluidly to do it. At least until these kids can learn to speak our language."

"Ah, I see," said the blond. "Don't worry, Levi. I may be able to find a suitable tutor for you. I'll start networking today and see what I can find. With luck, one of my colleagues knows someone that would fit the bill."

"That would be nice." And it would be an immense help to Levi. He was already reeling with the amount of new responsibilities he was going to have. There was so much to do before he could safely say they were settled in. The kids were going to need clothes, school supplies, some kind of toys, probably over the counter children's medication in case any of them got sick. Levi wasn't too fussed about bedding right now; his mother had extra pillows and there was a pull-out mattress under his old bed for extra sleeping space in the event of guests.

"I'm gonna have my work cut out for me," predicted Levi. "Maybe I shouldn't even apply for an instructor position at the academy until I finalize all the arrangements for these kids."

"Well, if it helps, I do nearly all of my work from home," Erwin pointed out. "I can watch over them during your work hours, if you get the position."

Levi hadn't really considered that. He was just satisfied that Erwin was willing to open his home to the trio, even if it turned out to be a shared custody arrangement between them and Levi's mother for a while. He was the one that came up with this idea, so Levi had been prepared to take on the lion's share of responsibility.

"You're really okay with that?"

"I am," confirmed Erwin. "I'm not bad with children if I do say so myself, and I'm sure my mother would help me if I needed it. Since she's retired, she has some free time. It may even be a blessing for her to get out of the house and away from Father some more."

"Huh. I guess you've got a point," said Levi. He knew Mrs. Smith had changed her mind about divorcing her husband, at least until his health improved enough to be on his own. It made Levi wonder just how hard the man was to live with. "Has anything changed between you and him yet, by the way? Has he reached out to you at all?"

"Not yet," sighed Erwin, "but he's a stubborn man. Once he gets an idea in his head, it's difficult to get him to bend."

"Sounds like another Smith I know," observed Levi dryly. Erwin and his father were probably more alike than either of them wanted to admit.

"I think he has me beat," insisted Erwin. "I'm willing to extend the olive branch. He just isn't willing to do the same, right now."

"Yeah, and that sucks." Levi remembered how devastated his lover had been over the man's reaction to finding out about their relationship. It made him want to kick some sense into the guy, but beating up his potential future father-in-law was no way to integrate into the family. "Just hang in there, Erwin. Maybe he'll surprise you and get a clue sooner than you think."

"One can hope," agreed Erwin softly.

Levi fought back a yawn. "Well, I think I'm going to catch a little rack while I'm on this flight. I haven't slept for shit since yesterday, and I'm going to need some energy to keep up with these brats once we touch down."

"All right, Levi. I'm eager to see you again and to meet them. Get some rest."

"Until then," said Levi, and he hung up. He put the phone back in its dock, bent over and retrieved the pillow and blanket he'd been given as a courtesy for this flight. He reclined his chair a little, adjusted the pillow and closed his eyes. Eren and Armin began to chatter softly to each other, and Levi surprisingly didn't mind the background noise. At least Eren wasn't yelling. Maybe this flight would go better than Levi had thought.

* * *

Later at the appointed time of arrival, Erwin stood beside Kuchel and Isabel at the gate Levi was supposed to be coming in from. The blond watched, subtly anxious, as people came out with their carry-on luggage. After several minutes, Kuchel was the first to spot her son in the crowd.

"There he is! Levi!" She hopped a little and waved, beaming at him with excitement. Her smile faltered a little when she saw the bandage on his forehead and the bruising around it. Erwin noticed as well, along with the way Levi was limping. The captain seemed to be handling his discomfort stoically, and he had a small blond child riding piggy back on him that Erwin immediately recognized as Armin Arlert. As the group came closer and people moved out of the way, Erwin saw that Eren and Mikasa were on either side of Levi, each of them holding onto the hem of Levi's shirt. The Shiganshina trio was even smaller than Erwin had expected, and it fully struck him how young they were. It was a bit startling, since the last time he'd seen them, they were approaching young adulthood.

"Kids, this is my mom, Mrs. Ackerman," introduced Levi in Marian once they met up with the group. "She's going to be taking care of you for a while, until Uncle Erwin and I have everything set up to move you in with us. You remember the words I taught you on the plane?"

The children nodded, and they each recited some basic Sinarian words Levi had evidently drilled into them, simple words and phrases like "dinner", "bedtime" and "clean up".

"Wow, so they don't speak our language?" Isabel said with interest.

"This one on my back knows a little more of it than the other two," replied the captain. He squatted down with a grunt to urge Armin off of his back. "Alright, kiddo. Ride's over."

Armin climbed off, gazing shyly up at the three new people in his life. His eyes were a little puffy, and on closer inspection, Erwin noticed the same of the other two kids. He couldn't tell if it was because they were sleepy or because they'd been crying at some point. Eren stared up at him with obvious recognition, and then the boy gave Erwin a military salute from that bygone era. Erwin smiled at him, finding it dreadfully cute.

"At ease, soldier," Erwin stated to the boy. Eren's two companions gave him a funny look, indicating that unlike their friend, they had no memory of that salute or what it meant. Erwin turned to Levi, and he spoke softly and with feeling. "Welcome home."

Unlike the last time Erwin had said those words to him, Levi didn't break down. Instead, he gave the bigger man the tiniest smile. "It's good to be back."

"How was the flight?" he asked, embracing Levi gently. He was beyond trying to be conservative right now. The sight of Levi and the feel of him in his arms was like heaven to him, but he was mindful not to squeeze him due to his rib injury.

Levi shrugged, and he exchanged hugs with his mother and Isabel next. "Not so tight, kid," he grunted when the teenager didn't demonstrate as much restraint as the adults. "I've got cracked ribs, remember?"

"Sorry, big bro," apologized Isabel sheepishly. "I forgot. Plus, most people with cracked ribs and a hurt foot wouldn't be giving kids piggy-back rides! You're such a bad ass."

"Isabel," admonished Kuchel warningly, "don't cuss."

"Oops, sorry." She grinned at her adoptive mother. "It just slipped out."

"Let's get to baggage claim and get out of here," Levi suggested. "I'm beat. I need a barber appointment to get my undercut done, too."

"The haircut can wait, son," said Kuchel sternly. "You shouldn't worry about anything except getting some rest for the next couple of days. Your hair isn't that bad."

Erwin nodded with agreement. Levi must have been keeping his hair trimmed fairly regularly, but evidently he hadn't had access to any clippers, so his undercut had grown out almost as long as the top in his time at the concentration camp. "I'd be happy to trim it for you tomorrow, Levi. I know how to do a basic undercut, if your mother has some clippers she can loan me."

"Hmm. I don't usually let anyone but my regular barber do it," mused Levi with a thoughtful look at the blond. He examined Erwin's hairstyle, similar in cut to what he usually had done, and he seemed to decide the blond was trustworthy enough to give him a chance. "All right, I'll make an exception this time. I don't really want to sit in a barber shop in my condition, anyhow."

* * *

Kuchel insisted on taking the kids home in her car, so that Levi and Erwin could have some time alone and a quiet ride back to her place. Levi didn't argue much with her beyond asking if she was sure, if only because he knew the brats were so wiped out from the journey that they would probably fall asleep in the back seat.

As soon as he got in the car with Erwin, Levi leaned across the seat to claim the blond's lips in a deep, sudden kiss. Erwin made a sound of surprise, and then he relaxed and responded to the kiss with equal passion. He was smiling by the time Levi pulled back again.

"Now _that_ was a proper 'hello' kiss," complimented the blond, tingling all over from the interaction. Levi hadn't spared the tongue, and Erwin's pants started feeling too tight almost immediately.

"I wanted to do it as soon as I saw you," explained Levi with a little smirk. "Figured I'd better not in front of the kids and everyone, though. I tried to explain our relationship to them so they'd know what to expect, but at that age, who knows how much they can understand? Eren looked pretty shocked to find out his old commander and captain are dating in this life."

"And the others?" Erwin began to follow Kuchel's red sedan. "They have no memories of us at all?"

"No, but they follow Eren's lead, and I think they've come to trust me enough." Levi sighed. "Shit, I ended up with all three of them crowding me about halfway through the second flight."

"Crowding you how?" asked Erwin curiously.

"Snuggling up to me," muttered Levi dourly. "I didn't know what to do, except let them. Armin woke up from a nightmare about losing his family, and he started crying. Well, that set off some kind of chain reaction, and the next thing I knew, I had all three of them letting loose the water works. Telling them to stop didn't do any good, and other passengers were starting to get pissed off over the noise."

Erwin winced. "It sounds like a stressful situation."

"Yeah, it was." Levi reclined his seat and stretched his legs out. "I finally got 'em calmed down and cleaned their faces off, and one of the flight attendants brought them some hot cocoa. Once they settled down again, they decided they wanted to sleep on me. I ended up putting the arms up on the seats to get them out of the way and scooting over to the middle. I had Eren sleeping in my lap, with Mikasa and Armin on either side laying against me."

Erwin smiled at him, finding the unlikely mental picture endearing, even as he imagined Levi's exasperated scowl. "You see? You _are_ a kind man, Levi. The trust those kids so readily put in you is further proof of that."

"I just wanted them to shut up," insisted the captain.

"If you say so," responded Erwin patiently. He fully intended to reward Levi, both for his service to the country and for his generosity towards those orphaned children. "Oh, I forgot to tell you that I found the beds I was after for them. The seller agreed to hold it for me until I return to Mitras. We could have their bedroom set up within a week, if I can get some help moving the furniture. Niles may come over and assist with that."

"I could help with that," Levi offered.

"You're in no shape to be moving heavy furniture around, Levi," reminded Erwin with a small frown. "I'd rather not end up having to take you to the emergency room because you overdid it. Let me handle the furniture arrangement, and let me help you pack your things to move in with me."

"Shit, I forgot about all that," admitted Levi with a sigh. "I don't have a lot of stuff, though, like I said. Shouldn't take too much effort to get it all boxed up and put in a moving truck or van. I'll need to tow my car behind it, though."

"We'll handle all of that when the time comes," assured Erwin. "For now, I just want you to focus on rest and recovery. The rest will fall into place with some help."

"Is that an order from the commander?" teased Levi sleepily, yawning into a cupped hand.

"It is," agreed Erwin with a smirk.

"Then I'll do as you say."

* * *

Kuchel was understandably puzzled after a few days of watching over the kids. She called Levi up while he was in the process of packing, and she expressed some concern about Eren over the phone with him.

"I know he's been through a lot," said Levi's mother, "but I'm a little worried about his mental state, son."

Levi paused in checking off some things on his list. He'd been afraid of this. "What's he done that has you worried, Mom?"

"Well, he draws the strangest things," she answered, "things that children wouldn't normally draw. His latest drawing is of a person being bitten in half by a giant. It's disturbing how gruesome and violent some of his scribbles are, Levi. Do you have any idea what this might be about? I've tried to ask him, but the language barrier makes it hard to communicate."

Levi glanced at Erwin as the blond stacked a box on top of another one and gave him a questioning look. He put a hand over the phone to muffle it for a moment. "Eren's been drawing titans and it's freaking Mom out."

Comprehension bled into Erwin's handsome features. "Then we should try to speed things up with the living arrangements. Your mother can't be expected to understand, even if we tried to explain Eren's behavior to her."

"No, she'd think we all need shrinks," sighed Levi. His mother was one of the most generous, open-minded individuals he knew, but even Kuchel had her limits. He took his hand off the phone again to address her.

"Mom, put Eren on the phone if he's around. I'll talk to him and find out what's up."

"Okay, just a moment," she answered. "Eren? Come here, honey. Captain wants to speak with you."

Levi waited until a young, familiar voice spoke to him. "Captain?"

"Hey, kid," Levi responded. "Mama Kuchel tells me you've been drawing some pretty nasty things, and she's worried about you."

"Just titans," explained Eren, "but people don't like it when I talk about 'em, so I draw them instead."

"Well, do me a favor and stop," Levi advised. "I know it's tough when you want to talk about something and nobody understands. I understand it's frustrating when nobody believes you, but Erwin and I know it's not just in your head, okay? If you want to talk about that stuff or draw any of it, wait until you're living with us. Most people think titans are just fairy tales, and most kids your age don't draw people getting eaten or killed."

"I know," Eren sighed in a small voice. "Not even Mika and Armin get it."

"But we do," reminded Levi, "so just keep it under your hat for now and draw normal kid stuff."

"I hafta keep it a secret forever?" asked the boy.

Levi grimaced. "For now, at least. We've got to show the system that we can take care of you lot and provide a stable home. If they think you're going off the deep end, they might take you away from us."

He nearly told Eren that not only would they probably revoke his and Erwin's custody, but they might also lock the kid up for psychiatric care. He refrained from doing so, not wanting to frighten Eren.

"Do you understand what I've said?" pressed Levi, trying to emphasize the importance of curbing that behavior. "Put on an act for now if you've got to, but don't talk about people being eaten by titans or you changing into one. It's for your own good, brat."

"Yes sir," sighed Eren. "When will we see you again?"

"Maybe by this weekend," Levi said ambiguously, unsure of how fast they could get this ball rolling. "I'll do what I can, but in the meantime, you three behave yourselves and don't give my mom any shit."

"Levi, do you have to swear like that?" Erwin whispered.

"It's nothing Eren hasn't heard a hundred times before," reminded Levi, but Erwin did have a point. Regardless of the child having full recollection of his past life, he was in fact just a child. If people witnessed Levi spouting off profanities around the kid, they'd probably question whether he was a suitable foster parent.

"I'll try to tone it down," sighed Levi. "I guess if Eren can put on an act, so can I. Eren, put my mother back on the phone, would you? And remember what I said."

"Okay."

Within moments, Kuchel's voice came through. "Well? What did he say, Levi?"

Levi considered what he'd said earlier about most people thinking titans were just legends. He hated to lie to his mother, but the truth was too unbelievable. "He got his hands on a book I had about titans, and I guess it put some ideas in his head," he excused. "Sorry about that, Mom. I think he gets that they aren't real, and I told him they can't hurt him. He shouldn't draw any more pictures like that, from now on."

"Oh, I see." The relief in Kuchel's voice was proof of how worried she'd actually been. "Thank you for addressing that, Levi. The kids are well behaved for the most part, and Eren is a good little helper around the house, but I have to admit I found those drawing a little unsettling."

"Yeah, well thanks for contacting me about it first instead of taking him straight to a shrink," offered Levi. "Hopefully you won't have to take care of those three for much longer, and I'll wire you some grocery money tonight."

"Levi, you don't need to—"

"Yes I do," he insisted. "You've put yourself out for us with hardly any notice or time to prepare, so I'm going to pitch in. We'll try to come and get the kids by this weekend, okay?"

"They really aren't much trouble," she said gently, "but if you insist. They do seem to miss you, Levi. I don't know how you established such a bond with them, but I'm so proud of you for all you've done."

Levi felt vaguely uncomfortable with the praise. People kept telling him what a great person he was, and he just didn't see it. Really, he was doing this because he didn't see any other choice. He felt like he had a responsibility to those kids, as much in this life as he had in the previous one.

"Just let me know if you need anything else, Mom. I'd better let you go so we can finish up with my packing."

"All right, sweetheart. Don't overwork yourself."

* * *

The week went by quickly, and once Levi handed in his apartment keys and got his deposit back, he and Erwin drove to Mitras in separate vehicles, got all of his things put away and more or less organized, and set up the kids' room with some help from Nile and Marie. By Sunday, the paperwork for initial custody over the kids was complete, and the couple drove to Ehrmich to pick the trio up. They enjoyed lunch with Kuchel and Isabel before getting the kids' few acquired belongings packed into the trunk and hitting the road with them.

Eren practically talked their ears off the whole way home, asking all kinds of questions about the place they'd be living at. He also talked about titans, of course. Levi almost stopped him, but the other two kids seemed to be used to hearing this sort of talk from Eren. Levi and Erwin nonetheless avoided openly talking about reincarnation and past lives all the same, just to be cautious. If the social workers asked the other kids, Levi didn't want Mikasa or Armin saying he and Erwin believed they'd been reborn.

It was tricky, but they managed to dance around the subject of titans without sounding like a pair of loons. When Eren asked them what they thought might have happened to all the titans, Levi and Erwin had no answer for him. They looked at each other, equally unsure. It was actually a very good question. They'd all given their lives to the cause before the titans vanished, and history was vague. Not a one of them had lived to see what actually became of the creatures or the remaining shifters.

Eren finally dropped the subject when Erwin confessed that nobody knew what had happened to them, and because they'd left behind no evidence of their existence, the titans were believed to be mythological; and that was why people reacted the way they did when Eren talked about them. The boy settled down after a while, and he fell asleep with the other two by the time they were nearly home.

They got the kids settled in, ordered pizza for dinner and had a relatively quiet night at home. After putting the trio to bed and retiring to the master bedroom themselves, Levi remembered that he still had information to give Erwin. He'd been so busy organizing things, filling out paperwork and adjusting to the changes in his life that Levi completely forgot about the memories he'd recovered about the origin of the titans, after Erwin's passing. He didn't really want to talk about the damned titans anymore, but he'd promised his lover that if he ever remembered anything that would answer some of Erwin's questions, he would share it with him. He put aside his desire to have sex, even though they hadn't done it yet since being reunited, thanks to his injuries. Levi sat down on the bed with Erwin, and he told him everything he remembered after the event of the commander's death.

* * *

"Amazing," Erwin stated after Levi described everything they'd learned about where the titans came from. "So the people responsible for keeping us trapped behind those walls were after resources. All of that misery, all of our struggles, were due to human greed and prejudice."

"That's the gist of it," sighed Levi. "There might be more that I just haven't recalled yet, but probably not much."

Erwin looked him over quietly, and he reached out to stroke Levi's recently cut hair. "And you still guided those kids, even after their insubordination."

"The decision was ultimately mine," whispered the captain, lowering his gaze. "You'd suffered enough, and I guess if I'd gone through with giving you the injection, I really wouldn't have been saving you at all. It would have been an eventual death sentence."

Levi met Erwin's eyes almost hesitantly. "So are you pissed at me for letting you go, or what?"

Erwin shook his head. "No. I could never be angry with you for doing what you felt was the right thing, Levi. I did charge you with the responsibility of safeguarding that serum and using it as you saw fit. I couldn't have asked for more."

Levi relaxed. "It was tough. I don't think I ever felt so torn in my life, as I was in that moment."

"It's over with now," reminded Erwin. He put an arm around the smaller man, and he drew him close. "You've given me the closure I've been wanting. Now I feel I can look to the future and stop dwelling on the past."

"How's the book coming along, by the way?" Levi's pulse started to race as his lover's calloused fingers caressed his face, then his shoulder. He was feeling suddenly shy and a little awkward. It was silly, because they'd fucked before and they were living together now. He should just go for it, now that he was healed up enough to fool around a little. They'd have to be careful of his ribs, but that was just a matter of using a position that wouldn't require a lot of movement on his part or put any weight on him.

"Ah, right." Erwin smiled. "I meant to tell you, but I've been sidetracked. They're going to begin printing the book next week. I finished it at last, and now it just needs to go through the editing process."

"Cool," said Levi. "I look forward to reading it."

He squeezed Erwin's knee, and then he slid his hand up his thigh. Tossing aside his hesitation, the smaller man purred a suggestion in his companion's ear. "Know what else I look forward to? This fat cock inside me again." Levi palmed Erwin's package as he said it, leaving no doubt of his sincerity. It swelled beneath his hand, and Erwin's low, soft groan was music to his ears.

"You don't think it's too soon for that?" husked the blond, even as he rocked into Levi's touch and started unbuttoning the captain's white shirt.

"It wasn't a serious fracture," assured Levi. "Hanji said I should be healed up in five weeks or less. As long as you don't jostle me too much or put weight on me, it should be fine."

"God, I would love to take you up on that offer," breathed Erwin, pulling back to stare at Levi hungrily, "but I'm not willing to gamble with your health just because I'm turned on, Levi. I can wait a bit longer, until the doctor confirms that the bone has knitted enough for you to be more active."

Levi sighed. "I really fucking hate rejection, you know."

"I'm not rejecting you," promised Erwin. He kept unbuttoning Levi's shirt, and he pulled it open to bare the smaller man's chest and the binding around his ribs. Erwin looked him over with a hot, admiring gaze, and he fondled Levi's nipples. "On the contrary, I want to get you off. I just don't want to push it too far and accidentally cause you harm."

"Oh," breathed Levi, immediately pacified by the tingling pleasure of Erwin's touch. He'd forgotten how fucking good this felt, and he and Erwin hadn't really even been separated for all that long. The man just had a magic touch, and in the time they'd become intimate with each other, Erwin seemed to have mapped out and memorized every sensitive part of Levi's body.

"Well, don't think I'm going to be the only one getting off," warned Levi. He crushed his mouth against Erwin's, and he started fumbling with the blond's pants.

"Just don't get me too worked up," cautioned Erwin, breath catching as Levi exposed him and started stroking his length. "I have some self-control, but it isn't without limits."

"I get it," answered Levi. He nibbled his lover's ear, and he brushed his thumb over the flushed tip of his cock. "Just let me know if you need me to ease up, hot stuff."

Of course, it was easier said than done. As more articles of clothing came off and landed on the floor, the two men's excitement grew. Both of them breathing raggedly, they kissed, fondled and teased each other's bodies until they exceeded their threshold, and Erwin dug the lube out of his bedside drawer despite having said he didn't want it to go too far. Levi's insisted kisses, soft moans and teasing nibbles did the trick to change Erwin's mind. He relaxed for his lover as the other man eased a finger into him, and he started fucking himself on it immediately.

"You sure you...don't want to do me?" panted Levi, staring at Erwin with flushed cheeks and bedroom eyes.

"Shit," groaned Erwin. "I think I lack the courage of my convictions, right now."

Levi smirked, and he lifted up again. Reaching down between the bigger man's thighs, he gripped Erwin's hard, throbbing cock and started stroking it again. "We can do it in this position. Just don't squeeze me. Come on, big guy...I won't break."

Erwin cursed again, and he capture's Levi's mouth in a deep, passionate kiss. He eased another finger into him, and he played with the smaller man's nipples as he worked to stretch him. Levi congratulated himself on a job well done when Erwin replaced his fingers with the head of his arousal. He purposely relaxed his thighs to sink slowly down on it, gasping as it filled him little by little. Bowing his head, he panted at the sensation.

"So big," moaned Levi.

"You feel fantastic," responded Erwin tightly. He cupped Levi's hips to keep him from moving too much, and he started fucking him from below—slowly. Levi tossed his head back and whimpered, fingers curling into his companion's golden hair. Erwin nudged in at just the right angle, provoking another shaken moan from Levi as the zip of sensation shot through him.

"My Levi," murmured Erwin, pulling back a little to watch his expressions of pleasure. "I've dreamed of this every night since we've been apart. I think of those faces you make when I'm inside you, or when you're inside of me, and it gets me so fucking turned on I have to jerk off."

"You've got a filthy mouth," accused Levi, "though I've got no room to talk."

Erwin chuckled unevenly, and he rolled his hips again, making the smaller man's eyes roll back. "You bring it out in me, Levi."

"Glad I could...inspire you. Oh! Ah, fuck, Erwin!"

"Too hard?" queried the blond, stopping for a moment.

"N-no. It's great."

Levi kissed him again, matching Erwin's motions as best as he could with limited movement. The binding around his ribs started to slip a little and it hurt some when he breathed too fast, but the pleasure of coupling was greater than his discomfort. He was so caught up in the moment that Levi didn't notice the bedroom door cracking open. He didn't see the small face peeking in with big green eyes, but he sure as hell heard Eren Jaeger's inquisitive voice.

"Captain? You're making funny noises and..." Eren trailed off with a gasp, and Levi cursed and yanked the comforter up over himself and Erwin to try and conceal their nudity.

"Knock first, brat! What are you doing out of bed?"

Now swaddled up in the white comforter, still straddling Erwin's lap and impaled to the hilt on him, Levi bemoaned his own failure to lock the door before messing around. If the look on Eren's face was any indication, the kid had already seen more than he should have.

"W-what are you doing to Captain?" Eren asked of Erwin.

Levi groaned, and he burrowed deeper into the cover wrapped around him.

"Eren, please close the door and wait outside in the hallway," Erwin said in a remarkably calm voice. "Levi is fine. We'll be out in a moment, all right?"

Eren hesitated for a second, looking between the two compromised adults before obeying the blond man's order. Once the door was closed, Levi dropped his forehead to Erwin's shoulder. His face was scorching with mortification. They were off to a great fucking start, getting walked in on during the first night of the kids' stay.

"It's all right, Levi," whispered Erwin. "I don't think he saw as much as you think. The covers were rumpled up and from his perspective, he couldn't have spotted the details."

"That doesn't make me feel any better. Even if he didn't see your dick sliding in and out of me, he still saw a hell of a lot more than he should have. The kid's already confused as fuck, Erwin. I told him you and I have a special relationship like what his parents used to have, but even with his past life experiences, I doubt Eren's old enough to really process it."

"I'm sure we can come up with an explanation he can understand." Erwin smirked at Levi, who was still wrapped up like a mummy. "You look so cute right now, peeking out at me from inside of those covers."

"Now's not time," Levi grumbled. Both of them had softened, and he eased off of his partner with a grunt, finally emerging from the comforter he was hiding in. "All right, so what are we gonna tell him? If he blabs about this to any social workers, we'll come off as a couple of pedophiles or something."

"For making love with each other? I don't see how."

"We were doing it in front of him, idiot."

"Not deliberately," insisted Erwin. "Plenty of parents get accidentally walked in on by their kids. I did it to mine once."

"Yeah, but they're a married heterosexual couple, not a pair of queer guys that just brought home foster kids. I think the system might see the situation a little differently, Erwin."

"Then we'll simply have to reason with Eren and explain to him that he wasn't meant to see that. He needs to understand he walked in on a private adult moment, and you and I weren't doing anything other couples don't do in the bedroom. Yes, we should have thought to lock the door, but these children need to be taught to knock anyway before trying to enter the bathroom or our bedroom. We need to practice more caution ourselves and keep in mind from now on that we don't have complete privacy."

Levi sighed. "Yeah, all right. Let's get dressed and try to fix this before the kid ends up traumatized for life. Maybe you should do the talking. I'm too fucking flustered right now."

* * *

Eren actually understood better than either man gave him credit for. Yes, it had been a confusing moment for him, but it wouldn't be the first time he'd seen a pair of adults hugging and kissing like that. He'd seen it in that other life, and he'd seen it in this one, too. He'd never seen two men doing it before, but Captain had already told him that him and the commander were special friends. What had worried him was the strange noises Captain Levi was making. Eren had never heard him sound like that before, and he'd been sure he was in pain.

As Erwin gently explained to him that he hadn't been hurting Levi, Eren inspected the shorter man just to reassure himself. He didn't look like he was in pain, but Captain's face was very pink in places as if he had a fever.

"Now Eren," said the commander, speaking Eren's language slowly and with an accent, "Do you understand what I've told you?"

The boy thought about it, and he looked at Levi again. "You were just hugging?" he asked, wanting to hear it from Captain as well.

"Yeah, just hugging," said Levi. "An adult kind of hugging that we do sometimes in private."

"Isn't that how people make babies?" pressed Eren, his face crinkling.

"Er, sometimes," Erwin said, coughing a little. His mouth twitched. "In our case, however, there won't be any babies. Only men and women can make them together, but sometimes men still enjoy hugging other men, and women enjoy hugging other women."

Eren sighed. That much was already pretty obvious, but it seemed really important to both Captain and Commander that he understood. Eren didn't remember ever seeing them hug like that in the old life, but maybe they had just been more secret about it then. Sometimes his memories got so tangled and confusing. It was hard for him to process all of them with his still-developing mind.

"So you hug, but you won't make babies," he finally said. "Why hug naked, then?"

"Because we love each other," Erwin said before Levi could open his mouth. "It's just something adults to together when they're in love. One day you'll understand."

"Until then, you've just got to remember to knock," Levi added, face reddening again. "Though I doubt I'll forget to lock the door again, after this."

"Yes sir," agreed Eren. He still didn't fully understand it, but he knew he wasn't in a hurry to see that again. Grownups were so weird sometimes.

"Now that we've got that out of the way," Levi said, "don't go talking about this to people. You weren't supposed to see that and nobody wants to hear about it, got it?"

"Okay."

"What were you doing up anyway?" asked Erwin.

"I was having nightmares," answered the child. "I wanted to sleep with you."

"Oh." Erwin and Levi exchanged a look.

"I don't want to now," informed Eren. "Not if you're gonna hug like that again."

Erwin dropped his face in his palm, and his shoulders trembled. "W-we wouldn't do that with you in the room," he said between chuckles. "Not deliberately, anyway."

"I think he's cured of wanting to share our bed," stated Levi dryly. "So Eren, I'll give you some warm milk to help you sleep. Come on."

Eren took Levi's hand unquestioningly, and he walked to the kitchen with the captain while Erwin tried to compose himself in the hallway. If they thought he was going to repeat seeing that to people, they were wrong. Naked monsters eating people was scary, but seeing his heroes naked and doing that to each other was something Eren instinctively knew he should just try to forget.

* * *

"I should have waited like you suggested," Levi said to Erwin after returning to bed together. "I let my dick do the thinking for me, and this is what I get."

"We're both to blame," Erwin reminded softly. He turned out the lamp, and he rested his hand on Levi's covered hip. "I was just as careless as you are, and we never thought to talk to those kids about knocking. I think tomorrow, we should outline some rules and go over them. It's going to take some getting used to, living with three small children."

Levi tucked one folded arm under his pillow, watching Erwin in the dim moonlight coming through the blinds. "Talk about a crash course in parenting. I don't know what the hell made me think we'd just catch on naturally."

"Well, we did train them once," reasoned Erwin. "I think that gave me a false sense of security as well. We knew them as teenagers. We need to revise our tactics and get to know them as they are now, and remember they haven't the discipline they had back then."

"Tch, 'discipline'," sighed Levi. "Is that what you'd call it?"

"Well, relatively speaking," smirked Erwin. "The point is this: we can't treat these kids the same way we treated them in the previous life. We need to remember their age, and with the exception of Eren, they don't know us yet, either."

"Hmm, makes sense." Levi yawned. "I'd say we could try to finish what we started, but that flushed my mood right down the shitter."

"Mine too," admitted Erwin ruefully.

There was a rumble of thunder in the distance, and the moonlight got blotted out. Erwin sat up and leaned over to check out the window, just as a flash of lightning lit up the sky. "We have a storm coming."

"Great," grumbled Levi. "So much for a good night's sleep."

"You can sleep in tomorrow," suggested Erwin. He stroked Levi's hair, and then his hip. "I can watch over the kids if you need more rest."

More thunder rumbled, and they heard a tentative knock on the door.

"Shit, now what?" Levi sat up, but Erwin stopped him from getting out of bed, going to the door himself.

"Um, Mr. Smith?" Levi heard Armin's voice say, "C-can we sleep in here?"

Erwin looked back at Levi, and he stepped aside to reveal all three of the children standing at the threshold. Levi was surprised to see Eren with them, after what happened earlier. Apparently the approaching storm troubled the boy more than his brief glimpse of them getting it on.

"Well, Levi?" Erwin prompted. "It's their first night in a strange, new place. Shall we make some room?"

Levi sighed, and he rubbed his tired eyes. At least he and Erwin were wearing pajamas, now. "Fine, but don't climb all over me. My ribs are sore."

* * *

-To be continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> End of Chapter Recap:
> 
> Levi: "Why do people have brats, anyway? Fuck, I can't look away for a second without losing track of one of them!"
> 
> Armin: "Mr. Captain, you cussed!"
> 
> Levi: "And? Damn it, now where'd Mikasa go? Armin, go get her for me."
> 
> Armin: "I miss my mommy."
> 
> Eren: "Me too."
> 
> Mikasa: "Me three."
> 
> Levi: "Make that four of us. *sigh*"
> 
> Erwin: "So, how was the flight?"
> 
> Levi: "If there is a Hell, I'd go there about now for a little R & R."
> 
> Isabel: "I'd better not get stuck babysitting these guys!"
> 
> Kuchel: "What's that you're drawing, Eren? A pretty picture? Oh. That's...not rainbows and puppies. I'm officially disturbed."
> 
> Levi: "Don't worry, Mom. The kid's just got a big imagination (and cut it out, Eren)."
> 
> Eren: "Yay! I get to live with Captain! Maybe I can sleep in there with—wait...why is Captain naked and hugging Commander?"
> 
> Levi: *dives under the covers* "For shit's sake, knock, Eren!"
> 
> Erwin: "I think from now on, we should employ the precaution of locking our door when we go to bed..."
> 
> Levi: "You think?"
> 
> Eren: "And I thought the nightmares about titans were scary."


	20. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay in updating this one!

It took a while for Levi to get over being walked in on by Eren. Not only did he lock the door each night after the incident, but he bought a chain lock to install on it as well, just in case. Erwin teased him and said he was being paranoid, but Levi wasn't about to repeat that first night's mistake. The position he was after at the Mitras base academy wasn't available yet, but one of the instructors was due to retire at the end of the year. Levi applied to replace him, and in the meantime, he focused on getting the trio started on an education. He had no choice but to home school them at first, just as he suspected. He picked up some material to help him teach them to speak Sinarian well enough to go to public school. Mikasa and Armin were picking up on it pretty well, but Eren was excelling at it—probably because it was the same language he'd grown up speaking in the previous life.

It was a little tight, the five of them living in Erwin's small home together. They made it work though, and Levi took the kids to the park on the days when the weather was decent enough, allowing them to play after having their language lesson. There were plenty of hiccups in the adjustment period, of course. Armin in particular had issues with being afraid of the dark and thunder, so he often wanted to sleep in the bed with Erwin and Levi. Eren always came with him when Armin requested sleeping with them, and Levi suspected that Mikasa came too just to be with the boys.

Levi stayed in contact with Hanji whenever possible, keeping her updated on his recovery and how the kids were doing. He found out that Mike had been released two weeks after Levi's return home, and Hanji and Moblit were due to finish their tour by the end of the year. The military was pulling troops out of Maria left and right. Sinarian government finally gave up on trying to fix the problems in that country, though according to Levi's superiors, they couldn't withdraw all of the troops too quickly.

Levi's ribs healed up enough for him to get back into his fitness routine, and Erwin sometimes went with him to the gym. Constance came to visit and meet the kids once things settled down, and Kuchel invited them over every other weekend for dinner and to stay overnight. On one such weekend, Levi and Erwin let the kids stay over there without them, so that they could have a weekend alone. Kuchel was very supportive of the idea, and she promised to call if anything went amiss.

It was the perfect opportunity for them to get re-acquainted. No worries about keeping their voices down so that curious children wouldn't come knocking, asking what they were doing. No concerns about someone getting scared because they heard a strange noise or had a nightmare. They would have the whole place to themselves for the weekend, Erwin planned accordingly.

* * *

Levi returned from dropping the kids off at his mother's house, and he found the foyer surprisingly dark when he stepped into the house. He could smell something cooking, something with an aromatic tone that he couldn't quite place. "Erwin? You here?"

"In the kitchen," came the blond's voice.

Levi hung his keys up on the hooks by the door, and he followed the sound of his lover's voice around the balustrade separating the foyer from the living room and the kitchen and dining area. On the table was a lit votive candle in a stained glass container. The overhead light was dimmed, creating a warm ambiance that was gentle on the eyes without being too dark. As Levi frowned over this setup, Erwin came to the table carrying two platters.

"Your timing is impeccable," announced the writer. He set one platter down before Levi's usual place, and one down before his own. "Baked tilapia fish with spiced green beans and rice."

Levi's mouth watered as he looked down at the attractively presented plates. He and Erwin hadn't enjoyed a quiet, adult meal together since the kids moved in, though they made sure they had a balanced diet. It looked and smelled fantastic. Levi took his seat as Erwin poured them both a glass of water and a little wine.

"You didn't tell me you were going to make dinner. I thought we were going out."

Erwin glanced up from his task of filling his glass. "That was going to be my original plan, but I thought for tonight, it might be more enjoyable to eat at home and relax together. Would you have rather gone to a restaurant?"

"Nah." Levi took a sip of the red Erwin had picked out. Not bad. "This is better. I'd have had to shower and change first if we had gone out, and then we'd have to be around people and wait for the food. I'm kind of beat, and I'm enjoying the quiet."

"That's what I was hoping you would say." Erwin smiled, and he sat down across from him. "Although, it doesn't have to be _too_ quiet."

Levi had started to dig in, and he lowered his fork when Erwin clicked the little remote he'd set on the table, turning his vintage-style music player and radio on. Soft classical music reached the captain's ears, and he gave the other man a look.

"Laying it on a little thick, aren't we?"

Erwin chuckled. "Too much?"

Levi shrugged. "I don't mind. I know you like this romantic, mushy shit. I'm just happy to eat. Didn't know I was this hungry, until now."

"I hope that it turned out good." Erwin folded his napkin over his lap, and he tried a bite of the fish. "Hmm, not bad. I could have used more pepper."

"Tastes fine to me," assured Levi, reaching for his water after tasting some himself. "So what other surprises do you have set up for me tonight?"

Erwin's vivid blue eyes met Levi's across the table, and he smirked. "Just wait and see."

A shiver went through the captain. They'd indulged in some things after getting over having Eren walk in on them; mostly blowjobs after bedtime and the odd quickie during the day when the kids were at work. They hadn't had many opportunities to take their time with it, and they sure as hell didn't play around with bondage or spanking kink.

"I can't wait," purred Levi.

* * *

Erwin could have dived right into the kinky stuff, but they had until Sunday to enjoy one another, so he intended to make the most of it. He wanted to sample a variety of couple's interactions that they simply couldn't risk doing when the kids were around. The first such indulgence, he'd already set the mood for with dinner. After he and Levi ate, Erwin ran a bath for them to enjoy. With Levi seated between his thighs, the blond took his time bathing his lover, teasing his body and kissing him. Levi squirmed as Erwin's big hands stroked and fondled his slick skin, and Erwin was quick to hush the smaller man's impatient objections with kisses. He let Levi return the favor when he was finished, and the water had cooled to a tepid temperature by the time they got out.

"Don't bother with the robe," Erwin said to his companion once they dried off. "Come to bed with me, Levi."

The captain's pink-flushed cock lifted a little at the suggestion, and a bead of fresh prefluid formed and sparkled on the tip. Erwin stared at it with a sigh of approval, and he closed the distance between them, unable to resist.

"On second thought," he murmured, "turn around."

Levi raised a brow at him, but he turned his back to Erwin so that he was facing the basin and the bathroom mirror. Erwin caressed the pale expanse of Levi's shoulders, looking at him through the mirror from behind. Levi was breathing heavily with obvious excitement, but Erwin refused to rush it. He just wished he'd thought to bring some lubricant in here, but he hadn't expected his desire for the captain to spike so painfully. Erwin traced the line of the other man's spine lightly.

"Bend over."

Levi smirked a little, and he complied. His ass quivered when Erwin cupped it and gave it a squeeze. Erwin kissed Levi's arching back, and he spread his cheeks with his hands. He brushed his thumbs over the sensitive pucker between them, drawing a low sound of need from Levi. Erwin straightened up a little so that he could see his lover's face in the mirror, and he stroked the spot with his fingers, up and down. He watched the pink tone spread over Levi's face as his attentions got him hot, and he kept it up, teasing him.

"Look at yourself right now," urged the blond. "Look at the expression on your face. It's beautiful."

Levi bowed and shook his head. Erwin reached around with his free hand to cup Levi's chin and tilt it back, and he whispered into his ear. "Look, Levi. For me."

He tickled Levi's perineum, causing him to wriggle unconsciously. He cupped the plump balls beneath, massaging them gently. Levi gasped, and his eyes flared open. He met Erwin's gaze in the mirror, and then he looked at his own reflection. Parted lips, flushed cheeks, pinched brows...he was a sensual vision. Levi's eyes widened a little as if in surprise.

"You've never really seen yourself like this," guessed Erwin. "This is the face I see each time we're together this way. This is the face I think of when we're apart and I miss you. Can you blame me for being a romantic sap?"

"Stop...teasing," gasped Levi, eyes flickering shut again. He was embarrassed, Erwin could tell.

"Believe me, you've got nothing to be shy about," vowed Erwin. He released Levi's chin, and he kissed his way down his back, bending his legs until he was kneeling on the floor behind him. He pushed a hand against the small of Levi's back in silent command, and the other man leaned further over the basin in response. Erwin nudged Levi's thighs apart, spread his tight little ass cheeks like before, and he started tonguing him.

"Oh fuck," quavered Levi, grabbing hold of the sink.

Erwin kept it up, swirling his tongue, entering him shallowly with it, withdrawing and doing it again. Having recently taken care of business and being freshly bathed, Levi had no reason to object to it. The night was progressing just as Erwin had hoped, though they still had yet to make it into the bedroom. Erwin intensified it a bit, slipping one hand around to Levi's front so that he could rub his dick. That glorious sound that Levi hated to make so much came spilling from the captain's lips, and Erwin smiled against the flesh he was pleasuring. He intended to make him whimper a lot more before he was finished with him.

Levi tensed and shuddered when Erwin delved deeper, his toes curling against the tiles. He held back his please, though Erwin could tell by the desperate groans now blending in with the whimpers that Levi was nearing his limit. He gave the captain's length a few slow tugs, and then he squeezed his sack again.

"Erwin!"

That was what he'd wanted from his Levi. That whining, begging cry. He'd have never imagined such a noise coming from Levi, but he was grateful that he was so expressive during sex. Erwin stopped, straightened up, and nuzzled the back of Levi's neck. The smaller man had his head bowed and he was gasping for breath, struggling to regain some composure.

"Go and lie down," suggested Erwin. "Wait for me, and get the lubricant out."

"If you think I'm gonna wait any longer than—"

Erwin took a gamble, and he gave Levi a sharp smack on the right ass cheek. Levi made a sound that was half-pained and half crazed, and his legs buckled for a second. Levi righted himself, gave Erwin a look that said he couldn't decide whether to fuck him or kick his ass, and then left for the bedroom.

Sighing with relief that he he'd played it right, Erwin bent over the basin, turned the cold water on and splashed some on his face. He needed to calm down before continuing this. He looked up, and he stared absently at his reflection.

_You can do this. You can remain in control. This is a special night, so don't blow it by getting too excited._

He rinsed with mouthwash and water, and he waited for another couple of moments. When he felt like he could face Levi again without turning into a rutting beast, Erwin left the bathroom and joined his companion in their bedroom. He froze upon stepping through the door. Levi was lying on his back, with his knees bent up and back, his nethers exposed to view and his fingers up his own ass. Erwin could see his handprint lingering on Levi's ass cheek where he'd smacked it.

"I...you...that's..." Erwin kept trying to find words, but his throat kept closing. He swelled back to full hardness, and a couple of drops of precum hit the floor. It was a wonder Levi hadn't started a fire, as hot as he looked right now.

Levi raised his head slightly off the pillow, looking at Erwin from the head of the bed, between his spread thighs. His gaze was piercing and molten on the blond, and he gave his erection a stroke with his free hand.

"You said to wait for you," breathed Levi, "but you didn't specify what position."

Erwin thought for a moment that he might swallow his tongue. "I...well yes, that's..." he gestured at the lewd pose Levi was in. "Rude in the best way."

"Rude?" repeated Levi, his voice an inviting drone. He rocked his hips, bit his lower lip and pumped his fingers inside of himself. They came out glistening and wet with lubricant. "You aren't going to turn into a prude on me, are you?"

"I said 'rude in the best way'," reminded Erwin, finally recovering some wits. He looked his companion up and down, drinking in the sight of him as he approached the bed. "I have to admit, I wasn't expecting to find you like this."

"You got me horny as fuck," countered Levi, "and then you made me wait. Get over here, blondie."

Erwin didn't think he had the power to refuse even if he wanted to. He climbed onto the bed, his slightly tanner skin contrasting nicely with Levi's fairer complexion as he covered his body with his own. He urged Levi's fingers out, and he replaced them carefully with his own. The captain's eyes drifted shut and he purred, reaching up to squeeze Erwin's broad shoulders. He was almost prepared.

"Give me that bottle, would you?" Erwin said with a nod at the container of lubricant sitting open on the bedside table.

Levi reached out for it, squeezed a little onto his fingers, and then reached down to smear it over Erwin's slowly thrusting digits. Once he did that, he collected some more, and he started working it over Erwin's cock. He stared up at the blond as he pumped his hand up and down Erwin's stiff length, spreading the substance liberally over it.

It was sweet agony. Erwin could feel the waves of lust rolling through him, but somehow it didn't feel frantic or hurried. He took his time, breathing in a steadying rhythm to keep from being overwhelmed. Levi seemed to have fallen into the same mood, and the captain started doing the sweetest things as they strove together to reach just the right moment. Levi kissed Erwin's chest, his shoulder, his throat...anywhere he could reach in his position. He touched the blond's face with his free hand, brushing his thumbs over Erwin's lips and eyelashes as he stared up at him.

Finally, Levi's eyes started to roll back, and he sucked in some quick breaths. "W-wait," he demanded, going still beneath the blond. "Shit...gimme a minute, hot stuff."

Erwin complied with his request, feeling like he needed a moment to calm down, too. He bowed his head and kissed Levi's jaw and chin as the smaller man panted and calmed himself. After a while, Levi opened his eyes again and looked up at him.

"I think we've taken it slow enough."

"I agree."

Erwin sat back on his haunches so that he was between Levi's thighs. He caught hold of Levi's left ankle, lifted it up to position his leg further back, and then positioned himself. Erwin nudged in, and he grunted at the sensation of feeling Levi's body draw on the tip of his cock. Levi gasped and reached for the pillow that his head was lying on. His brows knitted, his stomach tensed and he squeezed the material as Erwin caught up his other ankle.

Levi arched his back and angled his hips to give better access and deeper penetration. Erwin took the invitation, clenching his jaw with pleasure as the tight heat seemed to pull him in. Levi's muscle control and instincts were unsurpassed. "God, you're amazing." He started to thrust, taking it as slow due to the position and depth.

"Nnh...oh...oh..."

Levi evidently approved of the pace. He let loose soft little gasps and moans with each pump of Erwin's hips, and he canted beneath the bigger man to urge him on. As much as Erwin tried to keep it gentle, slow and steady, his excitement was building up too much again. He started putting a little more force behind it, and he let go of one of Levi's ankles to grip his erection and stroke it.

"Erwin," called Levi, and then he said his name again, more desperately. "Hunhh...ahh..."

Levi came a moment later, tense-faced and shaking. Erwin lasted but a few thrusts more, and almost too late, he recalled another courtesy he'd considered for Levi. He managed to pull out just as he came, and he released his lover's ankle and sated length. He still made a mess on Levi's thigh to compliment the one the captain had made on his belly, but at least he hadn't filled him up inside with it.

"You...pulled out?" panted Levi, turning his head to look at him as Erwin situated himself on his side next to him.

Erwin kissed him, equally out of breath. "It would spoil the romantic atmosphere if I made a mess inside you."

Levi glanced down with a raised eyebrow. "And the splatter on the outside? What's that, paint of love?"

Erwin laughed. "If it helps to call it that." He kissed the tip of Levi's nose. "The last time, you complained that it was sticky, and you spent a half an hour in the bathroom cleaning up. I thought this time, I would spare you that. I would have worn a condom to make it easier, if I'd thought of it."

Levi checked the bedding, chest still heaving as he caught his breath. "Looks like most of it got on me anyway. You've got a little on your hip."

Erwin looked, and he saw the evidence of Levi's observation. Fortunately, he'd thought of that beforehand. He retrieved some wet wipes he'd had the foresight to start keeping in the other bedside table drawer, and he cleaned himself and his lover off. Sometimes they wore condoms for easier cleanup or hygienic reasons, but it depended on the situation and how far they ended up taking it. With opportunities for private time limited, the use of condoms was just sensible, if not quite as satisfying.

Erwin disposed of the soiled towelettes, and then he pulled the sheets up over them and rested his cheek on Levi's shoulder. "Did I hurt your ankle?"

Levi made a puzzled sound, evidently not catching his meaning. "Hmm?"

"The ankle you twisted when you got injured," clarified Erwin. "I didn't grip it too hard, did I?"

"Oh, that. No, that healed first and hasn't bothered me. Sometimes my ribs still ache a little, but the doctor says that'll fade too."

"Good." Pleasantly lazy from the release of sexual tension, Erwin yawned against Levi's shoulder. He stroked the smaller man's stomach, and he traced the cool metal of the dog-tags lying against the right side of his chest. It was simply habit for Levi to still wear the tags most of the time, a habit that could take a while for him to break. Sometimes he took them off for bed, but he usually slipped them back on again after waking up, like an afterthought.

"I've gotta admit, that was intense," Levi mumbled into Erwin's hair, nuzzling it. "I started out hoping for something kinky, but you made the right call. Slow loving can be just as mind-blowing as a hard fuck."

Erwin smiled. Their first evening of their weekend alone together had gone even better than he'd hoped.

* * *

The next day was spent making breakfast and lunch together, lounging by the koi pond, taking an afternoon stroll in the local park, and finally preparing to go and eat out at a nice restaurant for dinner. At first Levi thought Erwin intended to make another picturesque, romantic night of it, but that was just on the surface. The blond presented a rather high-priced, high-tech sex toy to Levi that he'd apparently bought on the sly for this weekend. It was a bullet vibrator with bluetooth remote control capabilities.

Levi studied the hot pink device thoughtfully as he opened up the case and took it out. "You couldn't get another color?"

"Sorry, they only had it in pink." Erwin smirked. "But nobody is going to be able to see it, so what does it matter?"

"Hmm, good point." Both nervous and excited by the idea Erwin suggested, Levi looked up at his lover. "Let me get this straight; you want me to put this in and wear it all night during our date, and you'll have it synched up to your phone so you can control when it vibrates and how strongly."

Erwin nodded. "That's the idea. I know it's really kinky, and I'll understand if you aren't comfortable going along with it."

"No, I'll do it." Levi moistened his lips with the tip of his tongue, and he examined the object again. It was shaped kind of like a sperm, and according to the instructions, the tip of the "tail" was meant to extend outside of whatever cavity the device was inserted into, to make removal easier later on and provide reception to the device it was linked to. There were several settings of vibration intensity, speed and pulse frequency that the bluetooth user could select through the application.

"Okay, I'll go into the bathroom and put it in," Levi decided. Surely he could endure this without giving himself away. He knew how to pull a poker face, even when in discomfort or pain. This could be a fun little challenge for the night, and it was kind of sexy. He'd already cleaned himself out in anticipation of sex later on, so it shouldn't take him long to insert the thing.

"I'll download and install the app while you're doing that," said Erwin, a twinkle of anticipation in his eyes. "I admit, I wasn't sure you would go for it."

"I've been through a war and seen the inside of a POW/concentration camp," reminded Levi dryly. "I think I can handle this."

Levi let that sink in for his companion as he collected the lube and went to the bathroom to put the device in.

* * *

It was uncomfortable, but not unbearable. Levi managed to insert the bullet with relative ease, and he left the bathroom to join his companion again. Erwin was in the living room, looking dashing in his combination of cream colored slacks, a matching blazer, a dark blue collared shirt and of course, the bolo tie Levi had given him. He was holding his phone and watching something on the screen, and he looked up from the device when he heard Levi's soft footfalls approaching. He seemed to drink in the sight of the captain, taking in his gray pants, white shirt and gray vest.

"You look wonderful tonight, by the way," complimented the writer as Levi closed the distance between them. Erwin reached out to fluff Levi's cravat a little. "That's a very attractive look for you."

"I was about to say the same of you," admitted Levi. "So, I guess we should test this thing out, right?"

Erwin nodded. "The app is almost finished installing. Ah, there it goes; it's ready now. You did remember to turn the bullet on before insertion, didn't you?"

"Shit, I knew I forgot something."

When Erwin groaned softly, Levi smirked at him. "Kidding. Yeah, it's on. Someone's eager."

Erwin smiled at him. "Testing me, eh? Well, I won't lie; I'm very interested in seeing how this works. Does it feel all right? Not too invasive for you to enjoy our meal, I hope?"

Levi shrugged. "It's a little bit uncomfortable, but I think I'll get used to it with a little time."

"Good. Now, let me see..." he opened up the application on his phone, and Levi leaned in curiously as Erwin pulled up the settings. Fortunately, the blond was a gentleman about it and he tried the lowest, mildest setting first. Levi's breath caught subtly as it started to tickle his prostate with a gentle purr. Erwin looked at him, tilting his head. "How does that feel?"

The captain examined the sensation for a moment. "It...kind of tickles a bit, I guess. I'll admit, I've never used one of these before."

"Never?" Erwin looked like the news surprised him. "I would have thought you'd had some experience, since you were the one to suggest we try some toys in the future."

"I've always wondered," confessed Levi, "and since you were okay with the spanking and restraining, I figured it wouldn't hurt to bring up toys and see if we like them or not."

Erwin put a hand on Levi's ass, rubbing it intimately. "And what's the verdict so far?"

Honestly, Levi wondered if he might have bitten off more than he could chew. The tingling vibration inside of him, coupled with Erwin's possessive hand on his backside, was already getting him hard. He played it cool, though.

"It's hard to say, just yet. I'll see how the night goes before I give it an up or down vote."

"Fair enough." Erwin bumped up the intensity of the vibration setting he had it on, and he watched Levi's face as the captain tensed a little. "How about this? Can you get through dinner on this setting, or shall I turn it back down to the first one?"

Honestly, Levi didn't know for sure. He kind of wanted to squirm, but he was a stubborn man. "This is fine."

_Holy shit, I didn't know he wanted to leave it on the whole time! I thought he just wanted to tease me a little at his own discretion. This might be tougher than I thought._

* * *

Erwin rubbed Levi's knee the whole time as he drove them to their destination. Knowing his kinky little love had that thing steadily vibrating inside of him was a bigger turn-on than he expected. There was something erotic about having Levi wear it in public, with nobody the wiser. He kept an eye on the other man subtly, noting little micro-flickers of change in Levi's expression before he would catch himself and force his face back into its neutral mask. When they hit a speed bump pulling up to the front of the restaurant, Levi gasped.

"Sorry," apologized Erwin softly, guessing it must have jostled the vibrator inside of him.

Levi sucked in a slow breath, closing his eyes briefly. "It's fine. Glad I brought this jacket with me, though."

Erwin nodded in understanding. Levi had decided it would be prudent to grab the light over-clothing on their way out the door, because it was long enough to cover him to below the hips. Erwin handed his keys over to the valet, and they got out to enter the restaurant. It was a moderately priced venue that Erwin had only eaten at a couple of times before, but both experiences had been enjoyable, and he wanted to spoil them both a little tonight.

Erwin opened the door for his date politely, allowing Levi to go in first. "We have an eight o-clock table reserved," Erwin said to the hostess. "It would be under Erwin Smith."

The young lady checked the list, and she smiled. "Right this way, sir. Will you be having any other diners joining you tonight, or is it just the two of you?"

"Just the two of us."

They followed the hostess to the two-seater table near a window in the corner of the restaurant, and she gave them menus as they sat down. "Your waiter will be here with you shortly, Mr. Smith."

"Thank you," he said, and he opened up his menu.

Due to the warmer temperature in the climate-controlled atmosphere, Levi slipped his jacket off and hung it over the back of his chair. Fortunately, the tables were covered with embroidered tablecloths, so at least the captain would have some concealment if his crotch was bulging. Erwin estimated that it must be, given the glimpses he'd helped himself to of it during the ride there.

"I like this place because they have a good range of food," Erwin said conversationally. He covertly slipped his hand into his blazer pocket to get out his phone. With the menu blocking Levi's view of what he was doing, Erwin activated the vibrator application. He gave the other man no warning as he sent a few quick pulses to the device inside of him, making it buzz strongly in short bursts.

"Shit," gasped Levi under his breath, clutching his menu tighter.

He peered over the top of it at Erwin, glaring at him. The blond just smiled. That was one of the neat features about this remote control application: he could trigger short bursts of intensity to keep Levi off guard, without having to change the set vibration. Erwin thought he could detect, very faintly, the muffled hum of the device during the brief pulses of stronger vibration. It was so subtle that he doubted anyone unaware of its presence would have noticed. Even if they could hear it, they would likely just assume it was someone's silenced phone buzzing.

The waiter came within moments, bringing a glass of water for each of them. "What can I get you gentlemen to drink tonight?"

"Hmm, I'll have a glass of your Chardonnay," Erwin decided, tossing the idea of getting a carafe or bottle of it. He didn't want to get too buzzed to perform later tonight. "Levi?"

"Uh..." Levi flipped the pages of the menu to look at the drink list. He peered at it as if he were trying to read an incomprehensible foreign language, and then he gave Erwin a look that was adorably plaintive and out of character for him.

_The poor thing can't concentrate enough to decide on something. Maybe I should refrain from doing that again until after we've placed our orders._

Erwin touched his fingers to his lips to control the urge to smile. He did his best to order for Levi, operating on assumption based on the captain's mood and tastes. "I think my companion will have a gin and tonic. Shaken, with a wedge of lime."

"I'll bring your drinks back to you shortly."

The waiter left after taking their order, and Levi seemed to breathe a sigh of relief. Erwin decided that rather than sit across from him, he wanted to sit closer. He scooted his chair around so that they were more adjacent to each other, and he leaned close to whisper into Levi's ear.

"Levi, how are you doing under here?"

The smaller man gave him a blank look, until Erwin subtly slipped his hand under the tablecloth, over his hip and between his thighs. Levi tensed, his breath catching as Erwin had a feel of his package. He started to close his legs, but Erwin nudged the left one in silent warning. Levi bit his lip and held still as the blond gently rubbed his straining bulge.

"How do you _think_ I'm doing?" muttered Levi after a moment.

Erwin grinned. He stopped fondling him, gave his knee a squeeze and brought his hand back out from under the table. "Just checking."

His pants were feeling a bit tight as well. He was getting turned on by the way Levi was reacting and the soft, subtle flush of pink in his cheeks. Doing all of this right under people's noses in public brought a certain, forbidden thrill. Erwin had planned how he wanted this second night to end, but he was starting to think he might not make it to that point. If Levi acted any cuter, he was going to forget his plan to have the captain inside of him and end up fucking Levi in some alley.

Erwin busied himself with the menu, trying to calm his excitement and decide on an appetizer and an entree. "How about sharing an order of shrimp cocktail, for a start?" suggested the writer. "Perhaps alongside some bruschetta?"

"Fine. Just...no oysters," whispered Levi. "I'm horny enough as it is."

Erwin laughed softly. "I'm not sure the rumors about oysters increasing libido are true, but agreed; we'd better not risk it."

Levi gave a little shiver and bit his lip again. Erwin continued browsing the menu, avoiding getting too touchy with Levi in public. This wasn't the place for displays, regardless of sexual orientation. He talked about the menu with his companion as they read through it together, and they both eventually decided on an entree by the time their waiter returned with their drinks. Erwin ordered the appetizers first, and then ordered the steak and lobster for himself. Levi picked out the green curry chicken soup for himself, and they were once again left to themselves.

* * *

_Fuck, he's doing it again. I don't think I can deal. Erwin, cut it out!_

Levi didn't dare say anything out loud about it for fear that someone around them might hear and start wondering what he was talking about. Erwin kept sending those stronger pulses through the vibrator, making it buzz hard against his prostate for a couple of seconds at a time. He stopped doing it once their appetizers arrived, giving Levi a relative break from the stimulation so that he could eat. Once they finished the appetizers, however, he started doing it again. He chatted casually with Levi as if nothing was happening, but the wicked gleam in his blue eyes said that he knew exactly what he was doing to him.

"So, tomorrow," Erwin was saying, "I thought we could visit the tea emporium. They have all sorts of blends from all over the world, there. You might find something to your liking."

Levi was breathing a little faster, and he shivered with each pulse Erwin sent to the wicked little sex toy inside of him. "That...sounds good," he said. "Unh!"

Levi quickly covered up his moan with a desperate swallow of his cocktail, barely managing to catch it in time. Erwin's hand reached under the table to give Levi's groin a gentle squeeze and a rub. He spoke softly into his ear.

"Are you getting close, love?"

"Ease up on the boosting." Levi's voice cracked a little, and he had another swallow of his drink. "I could end up with a mess in my pants before we've even finished eating."

Erwin obligingly stopped, leaving the device going at a more tolerable, mild vibration. He didn't offer to turn it off completely, and Levi didn't ask. Though that constant tickling was driving him crazy, Levi thought he could concentrate through the lower setting enough to finish their meal. He could have demanded that they put a stop to this for now, but he had fallen into a submissive mood since putting the plug in. He would let Erwin decide when to turn it off or take it out, unless Levi happened to need a shit, which shouldn't be an issue for the rest of the night.

Levi almost breathed a litany of thanks when their meals came out. He started eating his as soon as it was cool enough to do so, increasingly eager to finish and get out of this place so that he could satisfy his lust.

"Levi, you're not eating in the barracks chow line," chuckled Erwin. "There's no rush. Slow down a little and savor it."

Realizing he was being rude and this dinner probably cost Erwin more than a week's worth of groceries, Levi forced himself to slow down. The gleam in his companion's eye suggested to him that Erwin was aware that his haste to consume his food wasn't due to military eating habits. There seemed to be a question in his commander's piercing eyes, along with some intrigue.

"Yeah, I get off on it," whispered Levi, faintly annoyed.

"Hmm." Erwin cut into his steak, and he speared a bite of it on his fork. He held it up to his lips, but then he changed his mind about eating it. Instead, he held out the offering to Levi. "Try the first bite?"

"What am I, your poison taster?" Levi parted his lips to accept the morsel though, and he deliberately flicked his tongue against the meat before taking it off the fork. Erwin's eyes flashed, and Levi mentally patted himself on the back for giving his lover a bit of payback. "It's good," he confirmed after chewing and swallowing.

"Excellent. Try a bite of the lobster next."

Levi stared at him. Was he _trying_ to draw the dinner date out, just to test Levi's limits. Erwin's hand moved to the phone sitting on the table next to his plate, and Levi gave two strangled little gasps as he got treated to another four intense pulses of vibration.

"Try it," suggested Erwin again.

Levi took a calming breath, and he leaned closer to take the bite of lobster from Erwin's fork. Too much more of this, and people might think they were being too amorous. Sina society was tolerant of gay relationships and same-sex marriage was legal, but nobody wanted to see a couple making out at the dinner table in a fine restaurant. Too much more of this, and Levi might forget where they were and get them both thrown out and banned for public indecency.

"How is it?" asked the blond as Levi dabbed a little of the melted butter off his lips with his napkin.

Levi nodded. "Good."

Erwin smiled in satisfaction, and he stopped feeding Levi bites of his food. Maybe he saw the growing impatience in Levi's body language. They resumed eating as normal, and true to his word, Erwin didn't alter the vibrator settings again. Levi sighed in relief when he ate all he could and Erwin agreed to get take-home boxes for them. He'd half expected the devious man to insist they try some dessert, but it seemed Erwin was getting too restless and eager to prolong the dinner date any further as well.

They got the check, Erwin paid for the meal and as soon as the waiter returned with their stored leftovers. Levi was quick to put on his jacket again to hide his raging boner, and he noticed that Erwin adjusted his blazer to ensure he was covered below the waist as well. They somehow managed not to run out the door, and Levi clenched his hands as they stood at the valet parking area and waited for Erwin's car to be brought to them. They got in without another word as soon as the vehicle drove up, and Erwin slipped the valet a tip with a nod of thanks.

"Whoa, easy," admonished Levi when Erwin pulled out onto the street a little too fast. He got jostled from the dip from the curb, and he gritted his teeth.

"Sorry," offered the blond. He looked sidelong at Levi. "I'm just in a rush to get you home. You have no idea how damned sexy you were during that meal."

Realizing his cheeks had stayed heated throughout most of it, Levi understood how Erwin had arrived at that conclusion. The man seemed to love making him blush, whether it be from passion or embarrassment. He panted softly, rubbing his palms up and down his thighs. He wanted to touch himself. Maybe he should just give in to temptation. It would certainly entice Erwin, and Levi was feeling less reserved and more naughty than ever.

_Fuck it. I'm so worked up, I've got to do something. The top's up and it's night time. Nobody's going to see except Erwin._

Greatly daring, Levi unzipped his fly and unbuckled his belt. He unbuttoned the bottom half of his vest, and he exposed himself to get started. Erwin noticed immediately, of course. The blond nearly gave himself whiplash turning his head to look as Levi started masturbating.

"Levi, what are you—"

"Keep one eye on the road," cautioned the captain. He groaned softly as he stroked his thumb over the glistening tip of his sex. "I couldn't stand it anymore. I'll stop when we get home. It's only about twenty minutes, right?"

Erwin looked ahead at the road, and he swallowed. "I'm not sure I can wait that long. There's a motel coming up on the next street. We could—"

"I'm not doing it in some roach motel," Levi gasped. Shit, he wasn't going to make it through the drive home, though. He'd rather do it in Erwin's car. At least it was clean, and Levi didn't take up much room so they could deal with the limited space. "Isn't there some place you could pull over for a while?"

Erwin looked at his navigator screen, checking the street map display. "Yes. There's a lakeside park. If we could find a spot secluded enough out of view of the road, that might do."

"Let's try that, then." Levi jerked his arousal a little faster, moaning. He stopped when he realized he was going to blow his load if he kept on. He didn't tuck himself in, but he took his hand away and gripped the edges of his seat to resist temptation.

Erwin shot him a lusty glance. "There's lubricant, condoms and damp wipes in the glove box."

"Oh?" Levi managed a smirk. "So you were anticipating us not making it home."

"I prepared for the possibility," confirmed the blond. "I'd actually forgotten about that, until just now."

Levi opened up the glove box to find said items. Condoms were a good thing to have. It would prevent a lot of mess and protect Erwin's upholstery. The clever nerd had even thought to buy two separate packs; one extra large for himself, and one standard for Levi. The captain tore open one of the standard packs, and he hastily rolled it over his erection.

Erwin pulled into the park entrance, and he found a spot that might suit their needs. It was away from the majority parking, set in a place meant to provide parking for camping or barbeques near one of the boat ramps. Nobody else was around, and Erwin was quick to cut off the headlights and turn to Levi. He scooted his chair back, and he adjusted the steering wheel to make more room.

"Come here."

Levi was happy to obey. With a little maneuvering, he joined Erwin in the driver's seat and straddled the bigger man's lap. He almost knocked the car out of parking gear with his foot trying to get settled, but he made it without further incident. Their mouths met urgently, and Levi's hands scrambled to get Erwin's pants undone. The captain rocked in his lover's lap, trying to find some relief from the constant, buzzing tickling inside of him. He got Erwin's belt and pants undone, but then he faced another issue: removal of the bullet so that he could replace it with Erwin's cock.

"Not yet, Levi," said the blond when Levi tugged his pants down over his ass and reached behind to start working the toy out of him.

"W-what the hell do you mean, 'not yet'?"

Erwin kissed Levi on the ear. "Not yet," he repeated huskily.

He reached around to cup Levi's bottom, and then he slid his hands closer together. His fingertips glided over Levi's bottom, moving unerringly inwards towards the cleft between his cheeks. He tongued Levi's earlobe, and the smaller man made a frustrated noise. Levi fisted his hand around Erwin's hard, exposed length, and he began to stroke it, hoping to entice him.

"Come on, quit messing around," urged Levi. "I want to fuck."

"We will," gasped Erwin, thrusting into his touch. "Just be patient, you little hellion."

One of Erwin's hands left the captain's ass, reaching for the phone. The other one provided an interesting distraction to keep Levi from blurting an objection to having the device setting tampered with. His fingers started playing with the little pink nub of the receiver tail peeking out of Levi's hole. It made Levi go still with shock as Erwin fondled it the way he might have fondled his nipples. It moved against his innards as Erwin manipulated it, increasing the sensation caused by the humming. In addition, Erwin's middle finger circled around the stem, caressing the sensitive flesh surrounding it while he played.

"Hunnnhh...Erwin..."

Levi pressed his face against the blond's muscular neck as Erwin teased him, while at the same time bumping up the vibration settings of the toy and locking in the pulse function as well. Levi squeezed his companion's cock impulsively, but he immediately eased his grip when Erwin grunted a complaint. Levi gripped Erwin's shoulder with his other hand, and he panted against his neck. He gyrated restlessly on top of him, unable to escape the intense jolts rippling inside of him or the tickling caress of Erwin's finger, relentlessly strumming and manipulating at his entrance.

Levi hardly noticed that his lover had unbuttoned his vest the rest of the way, along with his shirt. Erwin had surprisingly quick, deft fingers for the size of his hands. Levi didn't realize it until he felt the cool air touch his chest, making his nipples pebble immediately. He gave a little start as Erwin lightly pinched the left one, rubbed it, then did the same to the other one. The man hadn't even touched his junk, and yet the thrill and tension of impending orgasm was looming closer by the second.

"Fuck...oh, fuck! S-stop, I'm gonna come. Erwin, I'm...I'm gonna..."

Erwin kept going, ignoring his please. He stopped playing with Levi's nipples when the captain shuddered and started bucking in the condom, and he cupped Levi's chin to urge his lips to his own. Muffled groaned sounded in Levi's throat, his ass twitching and clenching around the vibrating little stem sticking out of it. The ruthless stimulation against his prostate made the orgasm last longer, and he grabbed a handful of Erwin's hair and thrust his tongue into the blond's mouth.

Erwin finally de-activated the vibrator when Levi went limp against him, panting for breath. He stroked Levi's hair, and he kissed his temple. "I really did have plans to wait until we got home, but you looked so sultry, sitting there exposed and lewd in my passenger seat. I was going to suggest you be inside of me while wearing the vibrator."

"Maybe another time," gasped Levi. "This thing has me prepped. I want you to do me."

Erwin smiled, and he stroked Levi's back. "Here and now, or shall we try again to make it back to the house?"

"Here," breathed Levi. He looked his boyfriend in the eye. "Now. That is, if we've got something we can put this vibrator in until we can get home and clean it up."

"Hmm," mused Erwin. He looked around, and his eyes went to the packs of unopened condoms sitting in the passenger seat with the lubricant. "Open another one of those. It should stretch enough to fit the bullet into until we get home."

"Hey, good idea," approved Levi. He'd been thinking of a grocery bag or even using the bag that the dinner leftovers were in, but that was even better. He leaned over to snatch up the condom packets, along with the wet wipes. "Mind cleaning me off while I do this, big guy?"

"Not at all." Erwin took the container of wipes from him, and he opened them up while Levi got the fresh condom ready to stash the vibrator.

* * *

It took a bit of finesse to get Levi into position for Erwin's purposes, but soon they had him turned around in Erwin's lap with his back to him and his pants pulled down to his ankles. They both had fresh condoms on, and Erwin fingered him for a while until he thought he was loose enough. He embraced Levi around the waist with one arm to support him, and he guided himself in with his free hand. With his knees spread wide and his ankles semi-bound by his pooled pants, Levi didn't have much leverage to control his movements.

"Easy," cautioned Erwin as he entered his lover. "Not too fast."

"Yeah," gasped Levi. Still, he sank down steadily on Erwin's sheathed cock.

The bigger man groaned as Levi's body drew him in, and he caressed Levi's chest and abs, feeling the tight knots of muscle bunch and relax under his palm. Erwin helped him lift up again after Levi had him in balls-deep, and they started a careful rhythm together.

"Is this...position all right for you?" gasped Erwin, entranced by the feel of him.

"It's great." Levi turned his head for a kiss, reaching down with both hands to squeeze Erwin's knees, situated between his. "Fuck, I'll never get over how it feels when you fill me up."

Erwin agreed with that sentiment, as well as the opposite experience. He probably leaned more towards being the giver in terms of which role he liked the most in sex, but every encounter with Levi was like a dream to him. Unfortunately, they weren't in a situation that allowed for taking their time. Erwin began to thrust more urgently, breathing hot and heavy into his moaning lover's ear.

He reached up hastily to adjust the rearview mirror so that he could see Levi's expressions through it. It was too dark to see every detail, but the moonlight slanting down from the trees was just bright enough for Erwin to make out his features. Eyes slit halfway open, mouth parted, brows forked...Levi's vulnerable look of passion was a thing Erwin never thought he'd tire of.

At his limit of self-control, Erwin started pounding Levi; or as close to pounding him as he could achieve in the cramped space. Levi grabbed at the steering wheel with a gasp, and his forearms started to strike the horn. If Erwin weren't so desperate to finish, he might have slowed it down out of concern that the noise might attract attention. He was too far gone now, though.

"Fuck, Levi," he growled, grabbing the smaller man's hips in his hands to yank him back and down into his thrusts. The car was rocking erratically on its wheels, and every pelvic thrust knocked Levi into the horn.

"Come on," urged Levi through clenched teeth. "Give it to me, blondie. Let me have it."

Well, he'd asked for it. Erwin was in no state of mind to refuse. A few more desperate pumps, and Erwin was unloading inside of him. Levi came at almost the same time, leaning forward to press his forehead against the wheel. Both of them cursed and groaned with the release, and it took them several moments to spiral back down.

"We should...get cleaned up," suggested Erwin, hugging Levi from behind. The windows of his convertible were fogged up from their activities. They must have really put off some body heat when things reached a pinnacle.

"Yeah," agreed Levi, straightening up again. He started to reach for the wipes, but then something caught his attention in the rearview mirror and he stiffened. "What the-?"

Levi twisted around and leaned to the side to look through the back window, and his face had gone pale.

"What is it?" Erwin asked, but then he saw the blue and red lights flashing over his lover's pale face. He twisted with a grunt as well. "Oh, no."

A police vehicle had pulled up behind them.

* * *

-To be continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Seems the boys are making it their personal trend in this story to get caught in the act in the most awkward, embarrassing ways.


	21. Chapter 20

"This is going to damage our record with Child Welfare," predicted Erwin with dread, unsure of what to do.

Levi was doing his pants and shirt back up. "They aren't coming to the car. Probably giving us the chance to catch on that we're busted and get decent before they approach. Let me handle this, Erwin."

Erwin looked at him uncertainly. "What do you intend to do?"

"Talk to them," answered Levi simply.

Erwin prepared himself for the worst as Levi got out of the car to talk to the police. He had his doubts that Levi could demonstrate enough congeniality to deal with this, but the blond was too shaken to tackle the matter himself. Erwin watched from the car as his lover approached the policeman waiting by his vehicle. He straightened up his clothes as he peered through the rearview mirror, trying to see clearly through the fogged windows. At least the officers weren't likely to have _seen_ anything inside Erwin's car, but he couldn't think of any logical excuse to cover up what was still blatantly obvious.

As Erwin waited on pins and needles, Levi showed the cop his identification and spoke to him. Erwin cracked the driver's side window a little in an attempt to listen in without drawing any attention to himself.

"—Just got back from touring Maria," Levi was saying.

The rest of his words got drowned out by the sound of the police radio going off, and try though he might, Erwin could not make out the rest of the conversation. After exchanging some words with the officer, Levi shook hands with him and came back to the convertible. He got in, buckled up and closed the door.

"All right, he's letting us off with a warning. We can go home as soon as he gets out of our way."

Erwin blinked. "What did you say to him?"

The smaller man shrugged, meeting his eyes. "The truth. Well, not _all_ of it. I left the sex toy part out."

"The truth in what format?" wondered Erwin. Levi wasn't known for being the most diplomatic speaker, and he was immensely curious for details.

Levi hesitated. "Okay, I embellished a little. I told him you were my fiancé."

Erwin's heart skipped a beat. "Did you?"

"It just came out," excused Levi. "But anyway, I showed him my military ID and explained our situation, more or less. I said I just got back from touring Maria and I brought three orphaned kids home with me to foster them. I said I moved in with my fiancé and this was the first chance we've had to enjoy an adult night out since. Told him we went out to eat, and things just got a little heated on the ride home, so we pulled off for a little fun thinking we'd picked a secluded enough spot."

"I see." Erwin smiled. He presumed Levi didn't specify the gender of his "fiancé" when explaining things, otherwise the officer might not have been so lenient. "And what did he say?"

"He was sympathetic. He said he understands what it must be like to come home after such a long time and want to be with a partner. He's also got two small kids of his own, so I guess he knows what it's like to sequester every spare moment you can for a booty call. He thanked me for my service, let it go with a warning and advised us to go straight home from here."

"Well then, we'll take his advice. Nicely handled, Levi."

"Let's just not bring this up at any family dinners," suggested Levi dryly. "I don't want our parents to know we got caught humping in the car like a pair of horny teenagers."

Erwin laughed and nodded. "Completely agreed."

When the officer pulled away, Erwin backed out of their spot and got back out onto the road. He didn't say more to Levi about the man's impulsive decision to refer to him as his fiancé, afraid that he would push too far. Erwin took it in stride, understanding it had been a tactical white lie. Still, it gave him hope that Levi was truly considering marrying him some day in the near future.

* * *

It wasn't easy, but everything was falling into place. Erwin's book had been printed, and Levi got a copy of his own to read. He could only bring himself to read it a little bit at a time, though. Some of those memories written in the story hit him where he lived, and he even had one horrifying moment where his vision blurred with tears, right in front of his lover. Erwin hadn't called attention to it, but Levi could tell he'd noticed. The tender look in his eyes said he even knew which chapter Levi must have been on. Eventually, Levi got through the entire novel. It wasn't the genre he would normally go for, but it was so personal to him that making an exception came easy. It was very well written, and it became a top seller within a few weeks after publication.

There were still two things missing from the foundation the couple were trying to build. One was a wedding—which Levi was starting to get more on board with each day. He didn't come right out and say it, but every time Erwin looked at him with such fierce love in his eyes, every time they had sex, every time Levi saw the blond put on his reading glasses and look so domestic going over the newspaper or writing a new article, it got harder for Levi to put it off.

The other missing piece in their lives was Erwin's father. Levi was seriously starting to think they would be estranged for life, and he knew Erwin was suffering over similar thoughts. He tried to be supportive of his lover, but Levi didn't really know what it must be like.

One day, nearly six months after returning home from the war, an idea came to Levi that was such a shot in the dark, he was almost afraid to put his hopes on it. He could hardly even believe he was seriously considering it, but it came to him when he went to meet a potential foster family for the trio, and it hit him like lightning.

* * *

"They're not good enough," Levi said softly, joining Erwin in the car.

The blond paused in the act of putting the vehicle in reverse. He studied his companion shrewdly. This would be the third time Levi disapproved of candidates to take in Eren and the others. The first family had been too shady. The second were too snobby. This one had seemed nice to Erwin, but Levi obviously disagreed.

"What's wrong with this family?"

Levi shrugged, and he looked out the window at the house they were getting ready to leave. "They want to put the brats in private school. They've just started at Cedar Elementary, and they're doing good so far. I don't want to fuck that up by relocating them again to live with strangers and have to start over at another school. I don't think these people have the chops to handle Eren, either."

"I see." Erwin hid a smile. "Levi, the longer they live with us, the more attached they're going to get. If you're going to relinquish them to another foster family, the sooner it happens, the sooner they can adjust."

"Unless the foster family backs out," Levi pointed out. He folded his arms over his chest. "What if they change their mind and the kids get put back in the system? What if they decide they want one or two of them, but not all three? I promised they'd never get split up."

Erwin pulled over at the curb, and he stared at Levi expectantly.

"What?" snapped the captain.

"I'm waiting for you to admit that you aren't willing to give them up," Erwin stated patiently. "If you're concerned about keeping the three of them together in one stable home, then maybe the solution isn't to relinquish them at all."

"Don't start that again," warned Levi. "I told you, I'm not cut out to be a parent."

"Oh no?" It was time to play hard ball. "Levi, you went for a parent/teacher conference last week when Eren got into a fight with another boy at school. You read those kids to sleep when they want a bedtime story. When Mikasa tripped and skinned her knee the other day, you took care of her immediately. Last night when Armin said he saw monsters under his bed, you checked for him and got him to sleep in his own bed for the first time on an occasion like that."

Erwin smiled at Levi, who appeared to be wavering. "Those children are well fed, clothed, educated and safe because of you. They clean up after themselves, they listen to you and they love spending time with you...even when you're moody. Don't say that you aren't cut out to be a parent."

Levi bit his lip. What came out of his mouth next took Erwin completely by surprise. "Let's get married."

Erwin blinked at him. He'd expected Levi to put forth more arguments about why he shouldn't file out the paperwork to adopt the trio, and how he was just trying to be sure they went to a good home. Erwin had been throwing hints at him about the possibility of marriage, but he'd been trying not to put too much pressure on him and just be grateful they were living together.

"May I ask what brought this on?"

Levi met his eyes, and he took a deep breath. "It's been in the works for a while now, right? The only thing that's been holding us back is me."

"Yes, but have I put undue pressure on you?"

"No. I've been thinking about it a lot though, and just now, I realized something."

Erwin tilted his head. "What's that?"

"I don't want to live in a world where we're not fucking married, for a start," answered Levi with a shrug. "We passed that opportunity up before, but there's really no reason to keep holding back. I'll have my instructor position soon, you're doing well with your writing career, and we don't have anything stopping us from taking this step. I want to do it, and it could solve a lot of problems for us."

"Which problems are you talking about, specifically?" Erwin was still dazzled by the sincerity in Levi's eyes.

"Your dad, for one thing."

That didn't make much sense to Erwin. "How would a wedding mend things between my father and I? The reason we aren't speaking is because he won't accept my relationship with you."

"Maybe he'll change his tune if we aren't shacking up," suggested the captain. "If we get hitched, he can't keep kidding himself thinking we aren't serious. We'll also have a better shot at getting approved to take permanent custody of the brat pack. Maybe even adopt them. My mom knows a good lawyer that could help us with that. It probably won't be easy, but gay marriage is legal here and we've got a good record with child welfare."

Erwin's eyes widened. "Is this a test, Levi? Are you suggesting this to gauge my sincerity?"

"Maybe a little," admitted the smaller man, "but now that I've said it, I know I mean it. If I'm gonna keep those kids, I want you by my side. If you meant any of what you said to me a few minutes ago, then your answer should be easy."

Erwin's heart pounded fiercely. He waited for a moment longer, fearful that he was about to wake up and discover he'd only dreamed this conversation. "I really hope this isn't a joke, because I absolutely meant what I said, and I've been waiting for you to agree to marry me since we first got together."

Levi's throat worked as he swallowed. "So we're really gonna do this?"

"I'll take you to the alter right now," stated Erwin in all seriousness.

"Maybe not _that_ fast, speedy." Levi shook his head, and he smirked. "Heh. Someone's eager."

"I'm an opportunist. I'm not about to hesitate when something I want drops into my lap."

Levi took a slow breath, and he nodded. "The wedding's going to be the easiest part of this. There's no guarantee it'll give your old man the wakeup call I'm hoping for, but it's a shot, and I want to be your husband. We may have to move eventually, though. Depends on what the courts say about it when the adoption process starts."

Erwin nodded. Right now, his place was considered acceptable enough to foster the trio, but if they wanted to make this happen, they would probably have to look into Erwin's previous idea about finding a larger place. "We can start browsing real estate and get a jump on that. Maybe we'll have already found something by the time the processing starts."

"Yeah." Levi stared at him for a moment, and then he released the breath Erwin didn't realize he'd been holding. "This is terrifying."

The blond chuckled. "Yes, but it's also wonderful. Let's pick up some champagne to celebrate and call our mothers."

"We've got to pick up the brats from school first," reminded Levi. "Don't start flaking out on me now, Smith."

Erwin was chagrined by the reminder. He'd forgotten what time it was, in his exhilaration. "Right. How foolish of me to get so distracted."

* * *

"You guys are getting married?" Eren's eyes were round in his tanned face as he looked between the two adults he and his friends had been living with. After bringing them home and preparing dinner, the couple sat down to the meal with them and announced their engagement.

"Yes, we've finally decided to tie the knot," answered Erwin with a smile, giving Levi's hand a squeeze. "We thought you three should be the first to know."

The children looked at one another, and Mikasa looked down at her plate. She pushed around her green beans with her fork. "Does this mean we have to live with someone else?"

"No," Levi said decisively. "Not if we can help it. That's the other news we wanted to share with you. Are you brats okay with living with us permanently?"

Eren gasped with excitement, and Armin smiled. Mikasa was the only one that seemed more wary than thrilled.

"Would they let us?" she asked softly.

Erwin sobered, and Levi peered into his beverage silently. The blond was the first to answer, diplomatic as always. He spoke in Marian so that it would be easier for the kids to follow what he was saying. "I won't lie to you; there is a chance that they won't. I'm confident that we can do this, but it may take some time to finalize. If things go as we hope, then you'll have a permanent home with us and we might move into a bigger place. Just keep up with your school work, stay out of trouble and do as you're told, and I think we can convince the courts that you three are best off with us."

Mikasa didn't seem particularly convinced, but who could blame her for having a pessimistic attitude? They'd lost their homes, their families and they were living in a foreign country. Levi had also warned them that they would only be staying with him and Erwin for a while, so of the three of them, Mikasa seemed least willing to fully settle in.

"What if that's not enough?" she asked.

"I'm going to make sure it is," Levi vowed. "It's not going to be easy, but with the right help, we can do this. Now eat your dinner before it gets cold."

Underneath the table, Erwin rubbed Levi's knee. He could sense the tension and doubt in his companion, and he felt some of the same. He knew Levi though, and he wasn't the sort to give up easily.

* * *

Erwin and Levi informed others of their decision, including their mothers. Constance was preparing to host a celebratory dinner at her house for them, including the kids. Jeremy came home from work to find the table extended and set. He looked at his wife curiously as she came out of the kitchen carrying a large bowl of tossed salad.

"Having dinner guests?" he asked.

"Yes." She set the bowl down near the centerpiece, and she started back for the kitchen to set out more. "Your son, his fiancé and the three children they're fostering."

He stared after her, and then he followed her into the kitchen. "What exactly do you mean?"

Constance checked on the lasagna. "You know; the son you haven't been speaking to? He's engaged to his boyfriend Levi, who's been back from the war for six months now. They brought over three orphaned children from Maria, they've been fostering them and they want to try and adopt them. If you would be a father to Erwin and speak with him, you would know all of this."

He didn't move right away, and then he took a step toward her and put his paperwork down on the counter. "Constance, I will not have—"

"It isn't up to you," she cut him off, rounding on him. Dressed in a pale green blouse and a white skirt, she cut an elegant, lovely picture. "I'm not banning our only son from this house any longer. If you can't be civil enough to sit down to a meal with him and the family he's building, then _you_ can leave the house until they're gone. Your pride is going to destroy your relationship with Erwin for good, if you don't at least try."

He sighed, looking more tired than angry. She compressed her lips, and she went to her purse sitting near the coffee machine. She opened it up to retrieve her wallet, and she carried the item to him. "Look, Jeremy. This is them."

She opened the wallet, and she showed her husband the photo Erwin had sent her a copy of. It was a picture taken in the park of him, Levi and the three kids. Seeing her husband's interest perk, she pointed out each child. "That's Eren, that's Mikasa and that's Armin. I've met them, and they're sweet kids. They've been through a lot and they're still trying to adjust, but I can tell they're happy with Erwin and Levi. This is going to happen, Jeremy. You can either be a part of it or not, but they are getting married and God willing, they'll adopt these kids shortly after that."

He didn't say anything. He kept staring at the photograph.

"You wanted Erwin to be married and have a family, some day," Constance pressed, sensing his resolve failing. "You wanted to be a grandfather. Well, you're going to get your wish. It may not be happening the way you imagined it, but it's happening. Try to accept this and mend the bridge before it's too late. You'll regret it for the rest of your life, if you don't."

She saw his conundrum. He'd done a hell of a job alienating their son with his actions, and that wasn't an easy thing to come back from—especially when it involved admitting fault for it.

"Jeremy, I can't force you," she sighed at last, closing the wallet, "but this is the closest you're ever going to get to your dreams for Erwin, and he's happy. You're running out of chances before he decides you're no longer worth trying to hang onto as a father. It's up to you."

With that said, she resumed setting up for the dinner. He stood there looking rather helpless and indecisive, which was better than him storming out defiantly.

* * *

"It's fine. It'll be all right, Erwin. Just keep moving."

"His car is here."

Levi paused and looked at the white luxury sedan that Erwin had nodded at. His jaw tightened, and he stepped in front of Erwin to face him. "So maybe he is. Maybe he went out with a friend. You won't know until you go inside, and if he's here, then this could be your chance to settle up with him and get your closure. You don't want to keep wondering, do you?"

"No, but I'm not sure I'm prepared for the alternative," murmured Erwin.

"You've got us," reminded Levi with a nod at the three kids crowded close to them, "and you've got your mom, my mom, Isabel and your friends. Don't forget Hanji and Moblit, too. Maybe even Mike, someday. No matter what happens with your dad, you've still got us."

Erwin forced a sickly smile. "Right. Well, let's get inside."

He wouldn't ordinarily ring the doorbell when visiting his parents' home. Before the circumstances caused the rift between him and his father, Erwin would usually just let himself in. He even still had a key to the front door. He didn't feel comfortable doing that now, so he pressed the doorbell and he waited for his mother to answer.

"Erwin, why didn't you just come in?" Constance asked. She didn't give him the chance to answer; probably because she guessed the reason as soon as she asked the question. She opened the door wide, and she smiled at everyone. "Come inside. Hello, kids! How was school today?"

"Boring," answered Eren.

"Fun!" said Armin.

"It was okay," added Mikasa.

"Talkative bunch, aren't they?" Levi observed as Erwin's mother gave him a brief hug.

"Ah, but I know little Eren can have a lot to say, once he gets started," she said shrewdly. "Go ahead and have a seat at the table. Sit wherever you like, I was just about to pour the wine."

"Where's Dad?" whispered Erwin as Levi and the kids followed his mother's indication and went into the dining room.

"He's in his office," she whispered back. "Erwin, why don't you go upstairs and talk to him? I think he's a bit nervous about joining us."

"What am I supposed to say?" he sighed.

"Try 'hello', for a start."

He grimaced at her. "That seems a little simple for a complex situation."

"I have faith in you...and in him." She patted him on the shoulder. "Go on, Erwin. Be the bigger man. It's past time for you both to either shit or get off the pot, as Levi would say."

Reluctantly, Erwin went to the modular stairs and started up them. He could hear the clamor downstairs as he ascended to the second level. Levi was getting the kids situated, and Constance was pouring them juice to drink with their meal. Eren was already starting to get more talkative, but blessedly, he avoided speaking of titans.

Erwin reached the top of the staircase, and he took a deep breath before walking down the hallway to the third door on the right. It was cracked open, and he could see the lamplight streaming out. He could hear his father tapping away at the computer, probably grading papers or writing up an exam for his students. Erwin paused again at the door, and he carefully pushed it open as if expecting a beast to jump him from the other side.

This was ridiculous. He was once the high commander of the Survey Corps. He once led men and women in battle against creatures that would terrify modern people to the point of wetting themselves. He shouldn't be this timid against a frail, bookish man that Erwin could easily bench press if he wanted to.

And yet he approached his father's turned back warily, like he was stepping over landmines.

"Dad?"

Jeremy Smith gave a slight start, and he turned in his swivel chair to look up at Erwin. He was thinner than Erwin recalled, but otherwise he looked healthy enough. He put his glasses aside, and he scooted in front of the computer monitor to block it.

"Hello, Erwin."

Now more curious than he cared to admit about what his father had been working on, Erwin frowned. He leaned over to the side a little to try and catch a glimpse of it, but Mr. Smith blocked his way again.

"What are you working on?"

"Just some paperwork," answered the older man. "I assume Levi and the kids are downstairs?"

It was a little stiff, but at least it was a conversation. "Yes. We weren't expecting you to be here. Will you be joining us?"

"I don't think your mother is giving me much of a choice," said Jeremy dryly.

Erwin's expression hardened. "If you don't want to join us, then you don't have to."

Mr. Smith sighed. "Is that how you feel?"

"Can you blame me?" Erwin nodded at the computer screen. "What are you working on?"

"It doesn't matter," said the other man evasively.

Now Erwin wasn't just curious; he was suspicious. "If it doesn't matter, then why are you hiding it from me?"

"Mind your own damned business," snapped Jeremy.

For the first time in his life, Erwin felt the Commander rise in him in front of his father. He stared the older man coldly in the eye, and his chiseled features hardened to steel. His father was up to something, and he intended to find out what. "Move aside."

It was the only time Mr. Smith ever showed throat to his son. He saw something in Erwin's stance and in his gaze that sufficiently doused his nerve, and he stepped aside as ordered. Erwin stared at him for one more brief moment, and then he stepped closer to peer down at the screen on the desk. His brows furrowed as he read the document that was pulled up, and then he came to an awful conclusion. He looked at his father with an accusing glare.

"You're trying to sabotage our attempts to adopt those kids from Shiganshina."

Mr. Smith seemed sincerely taken aback. "What? No, you misunderstand. Use your reading comprehension, Erwin. Look again."

Once more puzzled, Erwin looked again as advised, and he read more carefully over the material. He'd seen that it was a form from the Child Welfare Department, but he hadn't read any of his father's responses to the questions on it.

"I received that in my email earlier this week," explained Mr. Smith as his son read through it. "I was going to delete it, because I thought that your business with those orphans was none of my affair. I just opened it tonight after having a word with your mother. I didn't know you planned on adopting those children."

The verbal explanation along with the way his father had filled out the document showed Erwin that his first impression had been the wrong one. "You're advocating this?" He turned to stare at the older man with surprise.

"Yes. I also have some associates that may be able to help it go more smoothly." Jeremy wouldn't look directly at him. He sounded grudging to Erwin's ears. "Your mother made a very good point that I can't deny. Whether I approve of it or not, you've made your choice. I only hope it doesn't turn out to be a mistake that will ruin your life."

Erwin tried to give the man grace. This was a step in the right direction, even if he was still clinging to his stubborn pride. "I wish you would give it a chance. If you would try to get to know Levi, you might understand what I see in him. You might see how happy we make each other, and then it would be easier for you to accept."

Mr. Smith sighed. "I'm trying, son. It's difficult for me."

Erwin wanted to say that he didn't know the meaning of the word 'difficult', but it seemed Levi was at least partly right. Getting the news that they were engaged did seem to nudge open that door his father had slammed on him, at least a little bit.

"Then come downstairs and eat with us," offered Erwin softly. "If you can try, then I can too."

* * *

Dinner didn't turn out to be as much of a nightmare as they'd expected. Mr. Smith asked Levi a few questions about his career path when he heard that he'd retired from active duty and planned to be an instructor. He watched the children with quiet interest as they chatted with each other and ate, and he almost cracked a smile when Armin found out he was a teacher and wanted to know what he taught. Eren had to be shushed a few times when he got too excited about a subject and raised his voice, and Erwin managed to hold a civilized conversation with his father as the meal went on.

"Have the two of you looked into real estate yet?" asked Erwin's mother between bites of her food.

Levi exchanged a glance with Erwin. "We're still playing that by ear, for now. We've made it work so far with the space we've got, but if things go the way we plan, we'll be hunting for a new place by next year."

"And if they don't?" pressed Erwin's father, sipping his wine.

Levi resisted a sigh. He couldn't really judge anyone for negativity, but this wasn't a subject he wanted to discuss in front of the kids. If he and Erwin couldn't adopt the trio, then there was no need to move to a place with more room. They'd already decided that moving depended on how things went with the adoption process. The trio knew there was a chance they would have to go to another family, but it wasn't something Levi or Erwin liked to bring up in front of them unless necessary.

"We'll just have to see."

"I'm sure with the right connections, everything will be fine," offered Constance.

The sidelong look she gave to her husband seemed to have a hidden message in it, and Jeremy shrugged in response to it. That made Levi wonder what could be going on between them in the background, but he didn't dare ask. Erwin was tense enough without him fucking this gathering up by being too blunt.

"Could we get a pool?" Eren asked, wide-eyed with excitement.

Thrown off by the boy's abrupt question, it took Levi a second to realize he was talking about if they moved to another home.

_That's right; these three little clowns were always obsessed with water...especially the ocean._

"Maybe," Levi said evasively. He noticed the boy had some mashed potato stuck to his chin. "Tch...gimme your face, kid. You're getting more of your food on it than in your mouth."

Eren climbed out of his chair and went to his guardian, obligingly tilting his head back. He made a duck-face as Levi wiped the mess off of it with a napkin. Levi was too focused on cleaning Eren's face to see Mr. Smith's gaze soften on him and Eren at the scene played out, but Erwin noticed his father's reaction.

"So Dad, what are your thoughts on our plans?" Erwin said.

Hearing the underlying wariness in Erwin's voice, Levi looked up from his task to watch the exchange.

"I...think it's ambitious," stated Mr. Smith after some thought, "but you seemed determined in this course."

Erwin nodded. "I am. _We_ are."

Jeremy nodded. "Well then, I'm sure you'll pursue it regardless of my thoughts on it."

Levi heard the barely detectable sigh from his betrothed, and he subtly slipped his hand beneath the table to give Erwin's knee a squeeze. He shooed Eren back to his chair between Armin and Mikasa. "Don't make a mess. Grandma Smith made you a good dinner, so don't disrespect her."

* * *

That night they stayed at the Smith house, because dinner ran late, the children were fussy and Levi and Erwin had both imbibed in a little too much wine at dinner. Constance insisted that they stay overnight in Erwin's old bedroom, while she set up the other spare room for the kids. Levi fell asleep almost as soon as his head hit the pillow; unusual for him, but he'd found he slept better beside Erwin than he'd ever slept in his life. He didn't question it, he just pressed close to his lover and drifted off, wearing his shirt and underwear to bed.

Unfortunately, his dreams were plagued with flashbacks of both the previous life's war and the present life one. He started to thrash in his sleep, trying to cope with the confusing mesh of old memories versus new ones. They creepily blended together, and he had a nightmare about titans coming in to devour the survivors of the air strike that happened against the village that one night. He saw Erwin lying unmoving and bloody on the snowy cobbles, with one arm missing. He saw Hanji burned and sporting bandages on her head, sans glasses, wandering around the carnage shouting for Moblit. He saw monstrous forms closing in from the woods, plucking up screaming, injured villagers and soldiers to shove them into their gaping mouths.

"Levi, wake up," Erwin's voice called, pulling him out of the nightmares.

Reality returned to him, and Levi opened his eyes to see that handsome, worried face hovering over him in the darkness. He grabbed at Erwin without saying a thing, burying his face against the bigger man's chest. His body trembled as he worked on separating the dream from reality, and he breathed Erwin's scent in deeply.

He didn't know what to say. He wanted to excuse his behavior, but Erwin would have seen right through it. Levi simply clung to him, waiting for the tremors to die down. No words were needed. Erwin understood, and Levi knew that.

There was a knock at their door. "Captain?" Eren's voice floated from the other side of the door. "Are you crying?"

"Shit." Levi shook his head and sighed.

Erwin pulled back a little, smirking down at him. "Shall I let him in?"

"Might as well," grumbled the soldier. "The brat's not gonna go away until he knows I'm all right."

"Captain!"

Erwin chuckled, and he got out of the bed to let Eren in. The boy walked in clutching his teddy bear under one arm, and his wide green eyes fixated on Levi in the bed. Erwin gestured invitingly, and Eren scrambled onto the bed to lay beside Levi. Before Erwin could close the door, Armin and Mikasa showed up.

"Can we sleep with you too?" requested the blond child.

Erwin met Levi's exasperated gaze. "Well, can they?"

Levi grimaced, already being hugged tightly by Eren. Well, he couldn't let the titan brat sleep with him and deny the other two. He sighed, and he gestured at the kids. "All right, climb in. Shut the door, Erwin."

Erwin did as he asked while the other two children hopped up on the bed to lie between Eren and Levi. He joined the group, smirking with amusement at the annoyed captain. He situated himself on the other side of the bed, efficiently sandwiching the trio between himself and Levi.

"All right everyone, settle down and get some sleep," advised Erwin softly. He reached over the distance to grab Levi's hand. "We have to leave early in the morning."

Levi was chagrined to see the kids immediately pipe down and get themselves settled. Even if two out of three didn't remember, they all seemed to instinctively know Erwin was their commander. He favored his lover with a wry smirk, impressed. Inwardly, he admitted there was something comforting in the warmth and proximity of the three small bodies curled up close. Levi found himself stroking Eren's hair absently with his free hand as the child sighed and snuggled close to him, as if trying to protect him from something.

"Shitty brat," whispered Levi.

* * *

Constance awoke early the next day, and she went to Erwin's room to gently knock, prepared to offer breakfast before her son drove his new family home. She didn't get an answer, and she cracked the door open. Her hand went to her mouth to stifle a giggle at the sight before her, and when her husband sleepily stumbled down the hall, she shushed him before he could speak.

"Jeremy, come look at this," she whispered.

"What?" he mumbled crossly.

She waved him over, putting a finger against her lips. "Just look, dumb-ass."

He took the insult in stride, and he came up beside her to peek in. He went still upon seeing Erwin and Levi in the bed with the three small children sadwiched between them. Erwin's hand was clasped in Levi's even in his sleep. It was a ridiculously endearing scene, and not one that even a stubborn man like Mr. Smith was likely to forget.

"You see?" Constance whispered smugly. "And you were worried he would never have a family of his own. Pardon me for saying so, but 'ha-ha'."

His expression of early morning irritation faded and softened. He even smiled a little. "So I was wrong. What do you want, an award?"

She chuckled and gently closed the door. "Let's make them some breakfast and let them sleep in until it's ready."

* * *

-To be continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> End of Chapter Recaps:
> 
> Erwin: "Oh fuck, our reputations are ruined!"
> 
> Levi: "Nope."
> 
> Erwin: "What is this magic you wield?"
> 
> Levi: "It's called 'respect for veterans'."
> 
> Erwin: "Hmm, that's handy."
> 
> Levi: "...they aren't good enough. Fuck this shit, let's get married."
> 
> Erwin: *stunned* "Really?" 
> 
> Levi: "Yeah. We've got a better chance of adopting the brat pack if we're hitched, and it might help bring your old man around, too."
> 
> Erwin: "Bless you, tiny trio."
> 
> Constance: "Come over for dinner, Erwin! It will be fun!"
> 
> Erwin: "I hate it when she tricks me..."
> 
> Levi: "Just find your spine and do it. We'll be okay."
> 
> Erwin: "Dad, why are you trying to ruin...oh, wait..."
> 
> Levi: "Shit! I dreamed I was being shit on by a giant butt!"
> 
> Erwin: "Shh, it was just a nightmare."
> 
> Eren, Armin and Mikasa: "Can we sweep wichoo?"
> 
> Erwin: "Awwww."
> 
> Levi: "Shitty brats...but okay."
> 
> Me: "I gave myself some cavities thanks to you guys. Hope you're happy."


	22. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew! For some reason it took me ages to complete this chapter! Thank you for your patience, and I hope you enjoy it.

They returned home with the kids the next day, and they did some shopping for additional school supplies they would need. Levi was starting to feel like a house wife, but he was still waiting to hear something about the instructor position he'd applied for. In the meanwhile, his severance pay was enough for him to help with bills and groceries, while leaving enough to keep putting aside into savings. Erwin's book was selling well so far, and the blond had started collecting real estate catalogues to get an idea of what might be in their budget, should they look into moving into purchasing a home.

Levi and Erwin took turns making the childrens' lunches for school, and the same went for making dinner in the evenings. They both helped them with their homework whenever one of them had trouble with it—usually Eren—and a little under a week after having dinner with Erwin's folks, they got their first inspection and interview with a representative of the adoption agency. Erwin, ever the good host, made up a fruit and veggie tray to offer the agent, and Levi prepared some tea before they sat down in the living room to discuss matters.

"Thank you," said Mrs. Horst, crossing her legs. She wore a gray and white pantsuit, and her blonde hair was twisted into a fashionable bun. "Well, I'd like to prelude this by saying your references are impressive. Mrs. Ackerman is a well-known social worker, and her opinion is highly respected. Mr. Smith provided further references to your character. While we generally don't count immediate family as character witnesses when someone applies to adopt, they both provided us with enough alternative contacts to satisfy basic requirements."

Erwin nodded. "That's good to know."

"And the children are at your mother's house right now, Mr. Ackerman?"

Levi nodded. "Yeah. Since this interview is just about us, we figured we would send them over to mom's for the day so they won't be underfoot. We've got a small place, and we didn't want to have them cooped up in their bedroom while we have this meeting."

"I see." She didn't seem to disapprove. "Of course, that brings me to a concern of mine. While many families live in close quarters, the children tend to be born to the parents, rather than fostered or adopted. This is a charming little place you have here, but I'm concerned by the lack of space. It may work for now, but those kids are going to mature before long. One bedroom and bathroom between three teenagers my not fly with the board. Not to mention, one of the three is a girl. I shouldn't have to tell you the sort of arguments that might cause in the future, once she reaches puberty and needs certain things the boys don't. I see none of them are actually siblings, as well. That could cause some awkwardness once Mikasa starts developing; especially for her."

Levi grimaced a little. Shit...they were going to have to start buying feminine products and bras for her. He hadn't really thought of that. The social worker was right, and Mikasa was probably going to need more time in the bathroom than anyone else, not just because of her plumbing, but if she started wearing makeup...

"Don't worry, we've been browsing real estate," Erwin assured before Levi could remark on that. "I've already circled a couple of listings that I would like to look at this week, while the kids are in school. Preferably something with three bedrooms and two bathrooms; even if one is a half-bath."

"So you're already planning on getting a bigger place." She marked it down in her tablet. "That's good. Our records state that the two of you aren't married." She looked up from the tablet at the both of them. "I apologize if it sounds like prying, but are there any plans for that in the future?"

"Yes, we're working on setting a date," answered Erwin.

"But just out of curiosity, how much would it hurt our chances if we weren't?" Levi questioned out of curiosity. He could see why they would prefer for an adoptive couple to be wedded. The kids would have to take their name, and while he and Erwin had agreed on hyphenating their last names rather than dropping one of them, the children's were going to have to reflect that for legal purposes.

"Adoption laws prefer that couples be legally wed to better insure a stable home," she explained. "Not that it's a guarantee that a couple will stay together indefinitely, but it does make it harder for them to separate and split up the home. I'll be frank with you, gentlemen; it's fortunate that you went with us for this endeavor. Most adoption agencies around here would turn down a same-sex couple regardless of the legality of marriage between them. It's also fortunate for you, though regrettable, that these kids are refugees with no family to go to. That increases your chances of approval, but if you really intend to go through with this, it would be better for you all if you were married."

"Then perhaps we should bump the wedding date up," mused Erwin. He glanced sidelong at Levi, measuring his reaction to the proposal.

If he expected the captain to freak out or run, he was in for a surprise. Levi nodded calmly. "Makes sense. We'll see how soon we can book a celebrant, and we'll get back to you with the marriage certificate when it's done."

"Good. I'm glad to see you have initiative. My personal feelings on this is that you're both very responsible men, and you, Captain Ackerman...your service to our country will also work in your favor. I'll be sure to stress that point in my reports. Your home may be small, but it's clean and organized. Pantries and fridge are both stocked...bonus. What about medications, though? When I examined the bathroom, I found only basics in the medicine cabinet like toothpaste, bandages, antibiotic ointment, dental floss and hydrogen peroxide. Do you keep any medications in this house that might be dangerous for little hands to get hold of?"

"Yes, we do have medications," explained Erwin, "but we keep them in the lock cabinet in our bedroom. We can show you, if you like."

"That would be nice."

Erwin got out of his chair, set his tea down and gestured at the hallway. "After you."

The social worker went where he directed, and Levi followed behind Erwin. The blond showed their guest the wooden cabinet hanging on the wall by the bedroom door. "Its a retro piece," Erwin stated proudly, "and it's a combination lock so that there is no need for keys."

Erwin turned the combination wheels set under the right knob of the cabinet, and he opened the compartment up with a click to show her the contents. She adjusted her glasses and peered inside, taking note of the different prescription drugs as well as over the counter medications stored there.

"You've even put away the children's aspirin and cough syrup," she observed in an approving tone."

"Yeah, kids can get drunk on that syrup," Levi said, "and the aspirin is orange flavor, so we don't want them going at it like candy. Same goes for the kids' multivitamins. Everything except the topical stuff and bandages, we put in here."

Mrs. Horst looked more closely at the five different prescription bottles. "You did list on your application that you're both taking anti-anxiety medication."

Levi shrugged. "My doc recommended it. A lot of solders come back from the war with prescriptions like this."

"I usually only take mine at night when I'm restless," explained Erwin. "I sometimes suffer insomnia. Apparently that's a common thing for writers."

She smirked. "Oh, I've no doubt of that. My nephew is an artist, and he's recently started taking the same medication. They say having artistic gifts can be both a blessing and a curse. I imagine creative people just have busier heads than the rest of us."

"Well, let's finish showing her around," suggested Levi.

Erwin hid a grimace, and while the social worker looked at the bedroom, he pulled Levi aside for a moment and he spoke into his ear. "Levi, try to be polite."

"How was I not being polite?" demanded the captain in an equally low whisper. "She's got a schedule to keep too. I don't see the point in taking up her time with a shit-ton of small talk."

"It's better than rushing her out," reasoned Erwin calmly. "We need to maintain a good impression with her, and being pleasant will help with that."

Levi made a face briefly, and then he shrugged. If there was one thing the towering blond charmer understood better than most, it was how to make good impressions on people. Hell, he'd charmed his way into Levi's pants, convinced him to move in with him and now had him planning a wedding.

"All right, we'll do things your way," murmured Levi. He forced his expression into something that he hoped was pleasant enough when Mrs. Horst came back out of the bedroom.

"You might want to consider putting a lock on your closet," she cautioned. "I wasn't trying to pry, but I noticed what looks like a gun case up on the top shelf. I know these kids are small right now, but you'd be amazed by how inventive little ones can be when they see something they'd like to investigate."

Levi clenched his teeth to hold back a curse. He'd forgotten about his gun. "The case has a combination lock on it, but I see your point."

"We can fit it in the lock cabinet with the medication," suggested Erwin.

Levi shrugged again. He didn't mention that a home intruder wasn't likely to wait for them to unlock both the cabinet and the gun case to defend themselves. It wasn't like he thought he would have to rely on bullets to stop someone anyhow, and this was a decent neighborhood. Still, thugs weren't going to give a damn about that. If someone wanted to break in, they'd do it.

"We ought to get a security system installed," he said impulsively.

The social worker's eyebrows went up a little, and she inadvertently echoed Levi's earlier thoughts. "You're worried about security? This is a nice neighborhood, though."

"Yes, but nice places are attractive targets to some robbers," reasoned Levi. "Call me over-cautious, but I'm putting safety first."

Erwin had tensed up a bit, and he relaxed in response to Levi's excuse. "I agree. With three small children, it wouldn't hurt to take added security measures and test all of the smoke alarms, just to be safe."

Mrs. Horst smiled at them. "Boy, I wish all of my clients were as thorough as you two. You aren't just bringing this up to impress me, are you?"

"All right, you're partly correct." Erwin smiled winningly at her, and Levi refrained from rolling his eyes as the woman predictably blushed. "It would be foolish of us not to try and impress you, after all. I do think my partner's idea is a sound one, however. Trust me, Levi isn't the sort to worry much about what sort of impression he makes. He's only thinking practically."

She glanced at the small, dark-haired soldier, and she nodded. "I can believe that. All right, gentlemen. I should be going now, and I'll be back in touch with you later this week to set up an appointment with the children. I would like to get their take on your home life before I finalize my reports. So far, I can tell you that you're passing with flying colors."

"Thank you." Erwin shook her hand, and then Levi reluctantly did the same. "Have a good day, Mrs. Horst."

* * *

Levi closed the door behind the social worker, and he leaned back against it as he turned around to face Erwin. He folded his arms over his chest. "Did you have to flirt with her like that?"

"Flirt?" Erwin blinked, surprised. "I wasn't aware I was flirting. I was just being polite."

Levi snorted. "Sometimes you're clueless. I don't think you even realize it when you turn on the Smith charm."

Erwin chuckled, and he approached the smaller man to put his arms around him. "Is somebody feeling threatened, Levi? Could you be a little jealous?"

"Of her? No." Levi's mouth turned down into a brief, cute little pout, and he averted his gaze. "I just don't want her getting any ideas. You don't know what that fucking smile of yours does to people."

"Levi, we discussed our impending wedding date in front of her," reminded the blond gently. He slid his hands further down his volatile lover's back, and he cupped his ass. "If my supposed 'flirtation' helped to endear her more to us, so much the better. You don't need to worry about me jumping to the other side of the fence on you."

"Who's worried?" Levi reciprocated his touch, and he gave him a smack on the bottom. "This ass is mine. I'm not concerned you might stray, especially after the way you moaned my name the other night. I made you my bitch, didn't I?"

Erwin felt his cheeks warm up at the reminder. The kids went to the skating rink courtesy of Erwin's mother, and he and Levi took the opportunity to be intimate without the worry of getting caught in the act by anyone. If anyone had any doubts about Levi's erotic skills, Erwin could put that to rest without embellishing a thing. Levi had gotten him back for the night at the restaurant. He had him so worked up by the time he finally fucked him that Erwin was squirming like he was on fire.

"You really have a way with my body, I'll agree," he admitted. Erwin squeezed Levi's ass again, and he bent over to kiss the smaller man's jaw and throat. "But I think I have a way with yours, too."

"Maybe just a little." Levi smirked, and he started undoing Erwin's belt. "The kids won't be home until after dinner. How about a replay of the last time in reverse, hmm?"

"Actually, I'd like a replay of our last time in the car in combination with that," suggested Erwin with a wicked grin. "Only, not in the car in public, this time. In our bedroom."

"Oh?" Levi yanked the taller man's belt open. "Then let's get down to business, while we've still got the place to ourselves."

* * *

"Shit, I had to go along with this, didn't I?"

Erwin pretended not to hear Levi's insincere complaints, and he fought a grin as his lover practically whined in frustration. With the vibrating, remote control bullet Erwin had bought inside of him, his ankles bound to the backs of his thighs via buckled straps Levi had bought himself and his wrists cuffed to the headboard, Levi was quite helpless at the moment. On his knees and unable to straighten his legs, he endured Erwin's steady stroking of his erection. The blond's hand pumped rhythmically up and down the length of his lover's hard, flushed cock. He'd even taken it a step further and bound Levi's erection at the base with an adjustable cock ring to keep him from coming until he was ready to let him.

"Why is it," panted Levi, "you just keep getting kinkier every time we fuck?"

"Because you keep introducing me to new ideas?" reasoned Erwin with a husky breath of laughter. "The bondage straps were your idea, if you recall."

"Nngh...I don't know...what I was thinking. Hah...Erwin..."

The writer spiced it up even more, incensed by his partner's reactions. He gave Levi a smack on the ass, followed up by another on the other cheek. Levi groaned and shivered, his dick throbbing in Erwin's hand. He spouted a few curses, bowing his head. Erwin rubbed the abused spots gently, and then he reached further up to stroke Levi's hair.

"Too much for you?"

"I'm not gonna say it," grunted Levi stubbornly.

Erwin checked a sigh. Levi meant the safe word, of course. He wondered how far the little demon would try to push it, and it made him worry that he might truly hurt Levi by accident some day. It was his responsibility as the dominant to give comfort care and pay attention to his partner's reactions, but it was Levi's call to decide how much he could take before they called it quits. He'd already issued the safe word twice in their kinkier encounters so far, but when they switched roles, Erwin was always faster to admit when he'd had enough.

"You're so competitive," observed the blond. If he wanted more, though, Erwin would give it to him.

He gripped him again and started pumping his hand. Levi pumped his hips desperately, thrusting into Erwin's strokes. He spoke in a deceptively calm tone as he worked his lover into a frenzy.

"I'm glad that we decided to store these accessories in that trunk in the attic," he mused. It had been the safest option for them to keep the kids from finding their toys, and with the social worker coming over, they knew they were going to have to submit to a low-grade search of the home.

"Y-yeah," gasped Levi. "Imagine if that lady had found this stuff. Shit, and...you wanted to...keep it in your trunk. The cops would have...a field day if they ever pulled you over and...searched your car."

"That would be unpleasant, indeed."

Erwin was still faintly mortified over the last encounter they'd had with law enforcement, even though the officer hadn't seen the details of what they'd been doing together and Levi dealt with the situation cleanly.

"Heh...aauuuhnn!"

Levi's expressed amusement at the thought of Erwin getting busted with a collection of BDSM gear and sex toys in his trunk was short lived, because the blond adjusted the intensity of the vibrator inside of him. Erwin again stopped jerking him off so that he could tease Levi's nipples for a moment, arching over him and kissing his tense shoulder. Levi's panting grew harsher with the treatment, his hands gripping the headboard desperately. He called Erwin's name, finally losing at least that battle.

Erwin paused in the nipple play to arch over his restrained lover, and he cupped Levi's chin in his hand to turn his head, wanting to see his face. There was a dazed expression on the captain's blushing face, and his lips were shiny with saliva. His pupils were blown wide and his eyes were blank. Though they hadn't been delving into this sort of play for very long, Erwin had begun to recognize the signs that his boyfriend was reaching his limit. He kissed the dewy, parted lips and he decided to end it himself in the best way he could think of doing so without breaking the rules of their game.

Levi bucked into the writer's hand when Erwin unfastened the restraint at the base of his cock and gripped him again. He used his free hand to keep teasing the captain's taut nipples, and he husked suggestive nonsense into his ear. Levi's breath was hitching tellingly, and he lost the battle to hold back his whimpers and cries. He came in Erwin's hand after a few strokes, and the blond kept at it until Levi was spent and on the verge of collapse. The only thing keeping the man in his kneeling position were the restraints. Erwin quickly unfastened the connectors between Levi's thigh and ankle straps, and he followed up with the wrist cuffs.

"Levi?" whispered Erwin as the smaller man sprawled out onto his stomach in a trembling heap. He used his phone app to change the vibrator to its lowest setting. Erwin stroked Levi's dark hair, feeling the slight dampness of perspiration clinging to it. "You did well, love. I'm very pleased."

Levi turned his head so that he wouldn't suffocate himself in the pillow, and he peered at Erwin with a sense of comprehension slowly returning to his eyes. He turned onto his side to face the blond, and he sighed as Erwin explored his body gently with his hands. Levi didn't say anything, as was his wont sometimes when a session was intense enough to inhibit coherency. He wriggled a little closer to Erwin, and he put an arm around him.

"Glad you thought of the towels," Levi said at last, still gasping for breath.

Levi glanced down between the press of their bodies at the layer of bath towels he'd spread out over the bedding. Levi was in the damp spot, but he didn't seem to mind at the moment. Erwin cupped the side of his lover's face, and he kissed him gently on the mouth.

"Rest for a while," he suggested, ignoring the throbs of need in his own groin. They had time for more before they would need to tidy up and get ready for the kids to come home.

Levi pressed his cheek against Erwin's broad chest, and his lashes fluttered against the blond's skin as his eyes drifted shut. Erwin nuzzled him and rubbed his ass, though he'd only popped him there twice this time. Levi seemed to like having his butt rubbed after being disciplined, however it was done. It lulled the captain to sleep, and Erwin didn't complain.

* * *

"Levi? Erwin?"

Levi snapped awake at the sound of his mother's voice, and he jerked his head up off of his partner's chest to check the time.

"Shit. Erwin, wake up. We both crashed and Mom's here with the kids already."

Erwin mumbled a little, and he jerked when Levi poked him roughly in the ribs. "The door, Levi," he said upon gathering his wits.

Levi looked, and he cursed again when he saw that their bedroom door was open a crack. He jumped out of bed and corrected the problem quickly and quietly, while Erwin got up and started searching for their clothes.

"Are you boys home?"

"Be right out, Ma," called Levi, catching the trousers Erwin threw to him from the discarded pile of their clothes. "Put the television on for the brats, okay?"

"All right, son. Did I bring them back too early?"

Levi grimaced, feeling like a piece of shit. "No, you're fine. We just...dozed off for a little while and lost track of time."

"We apparently attract these situations," Erwin said in a low voice as he tugged his pants on and fastened his belt.

Levi gave him a blank look, having just unbuckled the restraint straps still around his thighs and ankles. "What?"

"Being interrupted, walked in on or close to both," explained the blond with a wry smirk.

"Oh. Yeah. Guess that's just one of the downsides of raising a family." Levi finished getting his trousers on, and he caught the shirt Erwin threw at him next. "We're just gonna have to get used to rationing our private time together and watching what we do around people—especially while the adoption process is still in the trial phase."

Erwin shot an alarmed look at the restraints lying on the floor at Levi's feet. "I'll put those back in the box and under the bed, for now. You should go out and greet your mother and the children."

Levi nearly winced at the thought of any of them peeking into the bedroom and seeing those items. He didn't even recall Erwin taking the vibrator plug out, but he obviously had at some point after Levi passed out. It was lying in its clear container on the bedside table, apparently already cleaned up and ready for storage.

"Yeah, good idea."

Levi slipped out of the bedroom once he had his plain, long-sleeved green shirt buttoned up. He went into the living room to find his mother seated on the big sofa with the kids. She'd turned on the television and tuned it to a channel broadcasting an evening sit-com appropriate for young kids.

"Hey Mom," greeted the captain. He walked over to them, and he bent over to give Kuchel a kiss on the cheek. The children, of course, demanded some affection from him as well, and he exchanged hello hugs with each of them. "Did you guys have fun? You didn't give her any hassle, right?"

"No sir," Eren said. "I mean, yes sir. I mean..."

"He means to say yes, we had fun and no, we didn't get into any trouble," Armin clarified.

Kuchel smiled. "They helped me in the kitchen with lunch, and we picked up some tacos at a drive through on the way here, so they've had dinner."

Levi nodded, deciding a little fast food once in a while was acceptable, given that they'd been going hungry most of the time in their country of origin. He just hoped his mom wouldn't make a big habit of that. She was in danger of spoiling them, and the last thing he needed was for the trio to become junk food junkies and start giving him shit about eating healthy meals.

"Where's Erwin?" asked Kuchel.

"He'll be out in a minute," replied Levi evasively. "Isabel didn't ride with you?"

"No, she had homework to finish, and her math grades are falling a bit. I thought it was best that she focus on that tonight."

Levi checked the time again. It wasn't late, but it was dark. Winter was coming and the days were getting shorter. "You don't have to drive home tonight if you don't want to. We can pull the bed out of the couch and make it up for you."

"I can drive at night just fine," said Kuchel, "but thank you for thinking of me, Levi."

He shrugged. "It's just a long drive for you to make alone in the dark."

"Dear heart, I am a grown woman, and it's only a couple of hours. Less with traffic dying down. There's no need for you to be so protective of me."

Levi shrugged. "I'm always going to be that way when it comes to you."

Kuchel smiled again, and she gave each of the trio a hug and a kiss on the cheek before getting up off the couch. "Well, if you're that concerned, you can make me a coffee for the road."

"I can do that. Come into the kitchen with me and have a seat at the table while I brew a cup up for you."

She agreed, and they left the kids to watch TV while they went into the kitchen together. Erwin joined them a short while later, and he poured himself a glass of milk before sitting down at the dining table with Kuchel. Levi prepared a cup of tea for himself, and soon they were sipping their beverages and discussing how the day went.

"They all finished their homework after lunch with a bit of supervision," Kuchel explained. "Eren scowled over some of it, but I reminded him that 'Captain' wouldn't be happy with him if he wasn't a good boy and didn't finish his school work. That was enough to convince him."

Erwin coughed and cleared his throat, his bright eyes going to Levi with subtle amusement. "The boy is quite taken with him. That seems to be consistent."

Kuchel looked mildly confused by the latter part of his statement, but Levi knew exactly what he meant. Eren had always deferred to him above everyone else, and that hadn't changed in this life. Levi had stopped wondering over it. He'd obviously made a massive impression on the shitty brat in their former life, and there were benefits to this hero worship.

"Glad he didn't give you any trouble, Mom. Eren can get mouthy when his passions take over."

"Oh, I've handled enough displaced kids in my career to deal with that sort of behavior." Kuchel winked at him. "Plus, I raised you. That gave me plenty of experience interacting with mouthy little boys."

Levi narrowed his eyes at her, but there was no sting to his glare. "I'm giving you a pass for that remark because you're my mother. Don't push it."

Kuchel's grin said she didn't take his warning the least bit seriously. "Aren't I lucky to be your mother. So, while we have a few moments to talk, I'd like to bring up the wedding." She had another sip of her coffee, and her quick eyes flicked between the two of them, as crafty as they were compassionate. "When will that be, by the way? You never did specify a date. Constance and I want to plan the wedding party together, so it would be useful to know how much time we have to organize."

Erwin and Levi exchanged a glance. The blond spoke up first. "Shall I tell her, or would you rather?"

Levi shrugged. "We've decided to get hitched sooner than planned, Mom. It'll make this adoption process easier, and it's pretty obvious I'm not planning on ditching this blond tree here anytime soon."

Kuchel's eyes lit up, and she raised her coffee mug in a toast. "That's fantastic! I'll call Erwin's mother tomorrow to let her know. Still, can you please do me the favor of providing a date?"

The couple looked at one another. They hadn't actually set on a fixed date yet. They just agreed to do it sooner rather than later.

"Two months?" Levi suggested uncertainly. It wasn't like he'd ever done this before with anyone.

"Make it one." Erwin smiled. "I think even two months is a bit long for me to wait."

The blond scooted over closer to Levi, and he kissed him on the cheek, making him blush. Levi grumbled, even as he petted his lover's hair impulsively.

"Can I just take a picture of this?"

Levi shot his mother an alarmed look. "Ma!"

Kuchel laughed softly, and Armin wandered into the kitchen with a shy but needy expression on his face. "Um...excuse me," said the little blond boy in perfect Sinarian, "but may I have some warm milk? Mika and Eren went to bed, but...I'm not sure I can sleep. Sorry."

Not particularly surprised by the boy's articulation and manners, Levi got up to honor his request. Of the three, Armin was always the least trouble and the most polite. "Hold on a sec, brat. I'll get it for you."

"One month, hmm? We're going to have to hustle." Kuchel was biting her forefinger nail in thought.

"Mrs. Ackerman, you really don't-" Erwin started.

"Mom," corrected Kuchel softly, smiling at him. "Please, call me 'Mom' from now on. I'm sure Constance feels the same toward Levi...and don't tell me it's not appropriate, you pristine blond giant."

Erwin immediate blushed, and Levi was hard-put not to choke on his tea. In some ways, he and his mother were very alike.

* * *

Erwin suffered another uncomfortable visit with his father a few days later. He really didn't want to take the invitation when he was invited out to lunch, but in the interest of mending their relationship, he did so.

"I've read your book," announced Jeremy between sips of the French onion soup he'd ordered. He nodded slightly—indication of approval. "It's actually quite good, son. It's not my preferred genre of course, but I couldn't put the damned thing down."

Erwin grinned, ridiculously pleased. "I'm surprised, I must admit."

His father gave him a sharp glance. "Because you thought it would hold no interest to me, or because it was largely about your fiancé?"

Erwin detected a flush trying to creep up, and he did his best to quell it. "What makes you think it was about Levi?"

Jeremy chuckled, and he set his spoon aside. "Something happened to you while you were reporting on the war, Erwin. It isn't so much of a stress to assume Levi had a hand in that. I can see it in your writing. Believe it or not, I know my own child...even though our relationship is under stress."

Erwin didn't know how to respond to that observation. In truth, his father wasn't wrong. The man was more observant than he'd given him credit for. He gazed down at his yet untouched serving of fried onion rings, and the only thing he could think of was how Levi would chastise him for the cholesterol in his chosen appetizer. Erwin chuckled in spite of himself.

"You find my observation amusing?" pressed Jeremy.

Erwin shook his head. "No, that isn't it, Dad. I'm sorry for being rude. I was...well, I was thinking of how Levi would be disapproving of my food choice, to be honest."

The older man regarded Erwin calmly. "So he's a nag."

"Of course not," defended Erwin. He re-thought it, and he flushed in spite of himself. "Well, perhaps just a bit. Only when he sees me making bad decisions, though."

_Fuck, how many bad decisions have I made in both lives and dragged Levi right into them? There must be more than I can count._

Erwin started to grin in spite of himself, and he recalled the way Levi often shooed people out of his private office in the past. His volatile little captain was always rather the jealous sort, unwilling to share him with anyone. Erwin felt a bit stupid for not picking up on that sooner. Those brief moments alone with Levi should have been evidence enough, but Erwin had convinced himself that it was strictly business. He could so clearly recall the intensity of that pale gaze on him and the unrestricted passion in Levi's voice when he'd threatened to break both his legs to keep him from participating in the last mission Erwin had gone on.

"It's good that he nags you," clarified Erwin's father softly. He had a sip of his chardonnay. "It means he really cares. I'd always hoped you would find a good woman, but Levi is the next best thing."

Erwin bristled. "Dad, you do realize you've just delivered a back-handed insult to my partner, don't you?"

Jeremy clearly didn't process it that way. "How? By comparing him to a woman? I assure you son, there's nothing about your boyfriend that strikes me as effeminate."

"That isn't the issue. You referred to him as 'the next best thing', as if I'm settling for something less than what I want. Let _me_ assure _you_. That isn't the case at all."

He hadn't meant to go into "commander mode", but it snuck up on him the moment his father's vague criticism came out. By the cowed look on Jeremy's face, it did the trick.

"I misspoke," offered the older man. "I didn't expect you to take it that way, Erwin. Obviously the two of you love one another very much. I'm still trying to process it."

Erwin tried to calm his anger. It was no good, though. His father still didn't approve of his relationship or his sexual preferences, and it made his heart hurt.

"Regardless of your personal feelings on the matter, I'm very happy where I am right now. I've lost my appetite." He dug out his wallet, and he retrieved the cash to pay for his meal—along with tip compensation for the server. "Here. Don't offer to pay, and make sure the waiter gets his tip. I know how cheap you are."

Erwin then stormed out of the little bistro, unreasonably angry and disappointed. His father stared after him blankly. It was probably for the best that he didn't offer a rebuttal.

* * *

"So let me get this right," Levi said after dinner and a movie with the kids. "Your dad offered to buy you lunch, and you gave him the 'fuck off' because he didn't say what you wanted to hear?"

Erwin averted his eyes. "That's a radical interpretation of the text, but I suppose it's close enough to the truth."

Levi rolled his eyes. He gave the blond a smart little pop on the cheek with his open palm. "Idiot. He's trying to reach out to you. He's the only dad you'll ever have, and he's helping us with this adoption shit. Stop being such a hard-ass with him. It's not like he called me names or anything."

"Ow." Erwin rubbed his cheek. "He didn't have to call you a name. He insulted our relationship by insinuating that I was only settling with you. He also called you a nag, if you must know."

Levi's pupils shrank. "A nag? Since when do I fucking nag you?"

Erwin burst into soft laughter. "Should I make a list?"

Levi poked the chuckling blond in the side. "Shut up, asshole. I don't nag. I just...offer constructive critique."

Endeared by the blush rising in his lover's cheeks, Erwin kissed Levi's pouting mouth. "And I wouldn't trade that for the world. Still, it rubbed me the wrong way. I know he doesn't approve of us, even if he tries to play it differently."

"So you storming out and acting like a brat fixes all that?" Levi quirked a brow at him. "Come on, I know you've been trying to get this guy's approval your whole life, but you should be used to opposition. How many damned times did you face down those rich swine at court when you had your meetings with the brass and the merchant lords? This isn't anything new."

"Levi, he's my father."

The steel glare softened to a warm silver, and Levi stroked his hair. "Right. Sorry. I get it."

Erwin put an arm around the smaller man, and he drew him closer into his embrace. Moments of quiet conversation between the two of them in their bedroom were ridiculously precious to him. "I'm not angry at your observation, and you aren't entirely wrong. I just see so much beneath the surface of everything he says. I know he's insincere when he extols our relationship."

"So what?" demanded Levi, mumbling against the bigger man's bare chest. He pulled back to look at him, holding Erwin's gaze. "Like you said: he's your dad. Cut him a little slack."

Erwin was frankly amazed. He knew his lover didn't particularly care for his father, and yet he was defending his actions. "Why is this so important to you, Levi?

The captain hesitated, and the dark sweep of his lashes shadowed his eyes as he lowered them. He shrugged, trying to be nonchalant. "I never had a father, okay? Never knew him in either life. It's always just been me and my mom. Maybe I just think you shouldn't be so quick to piss away this guy's efforts. He's trying to be part of your life. He sucks at it, but at least he cares."

Erwin propped himself up on an elbow, and he frowned at his companion. "Seriously. Who are you, and what have you done with my Levi?"

"Hardy-fucking-har. I'm serious, Erwin. I'm not excusing his assholism, but maybe we should take into account what he's been trying to do for us."

Erwin tilted his head, and he reached out with his free hand to trace Levi's pale, beloved features. "You just surprise me sometimes. Just when I think I know all there is to know about you, I get served another revelation." He smiled, albeit a little sadly. Levi's comment about never knowing a father figure in his life made Erwin feel almost guilty. People were always saying that it was important for children—especially boys—to have strong male role models in their lives. The closest thing Levi had ever had to that as far as Erwin knew was his uncle Kenny. It made him wonder if the captain's initial infatuation with him had something to do with that. Maybe Erwin was Levi's dad figure.

"I am going straight to hell," announced the blond as impure thoughts of twisting the "daddy" role to a sexual kink stole over him.

"For what? Being pissed off at your old man?" Levi quirked a brow.

"No, for...never mind. My thoughts run away with me sometimes."

Erwin could feel himself blushing, and Levi's suspicious stare wasn't helping to contain the reaction. Never before had he been so daring with a lover in the bedroom. Sometimes he still felt like a virgin around Levi, because the man introduced so many new and exciting things into their love life. Asking Levi to call him "daddy" while they were being intimate seemed a bit too much, especially after the conversation they'd just shared.

"Damn, your face is red," observed the captain shrewdly. "What's on your mind, blondie? I don't think I said anything perverted."

Erwin's face heated further, and he didn't dare confess the thoughts that had inadvertently stepped into his mind. "I just think too much at times."

"Look at you." Levi gave him one of those rare, sweet little smiles that melted Erwin's heart so easily. "You look like you got caught with your hand in the cookie jar. Spill it, Erwin. What's on your mind?"

"I..." Erwin cleared his throat, and he looked away. "It's really inappropriate for the moment. Can we just drop it, for now? I promise you, I'll get the courage to talk to you about it later. Right now I think it would be a horrid mistake to bring up."

Levi frowned at him. "You're confusing as fuck sometimes, you know that?"

"I'm sure I am," agreed Erwin sheepishly. "I'm sorry. You know that I have a habit of picking my moments, though. This isn't one of them."

The smaller man rolled his eyes and plopped back down on his pillow. "Be mysterious, then. I should be used to that by now."

Erwin couldn't help but laugh at the observation. "I know. One of the things I love so much about you is your utter lack of candor, Levi. I always know where I stand with you."

"Right now, you're about to be standing in deep shit if you don't stop eluding to things without telling me just what's up."

Erwin smiled. "Understood. I'll share my thoughts with you when I feel it's appropriate. I'm sorry for being evasive, love."

A shrug. "That's practically your middle name. Like I said; I should be used to it by now. So are you going to cut the old jackass a little slack or what?"

"I will." Erwin was fighting laughter. God, how he loved this man. "In some things, you're much wiser than I am."

"Good." Levi closed his eyes, and he covered his mouth on a yawn. "Let's get some shut-eye. Turn off that lamp, would you?"

Erwin started to reach for said lamp by request, but then there was a soft knock on their door. "Come in," he invited.

Mikasa cracked the door open and peeked in on them. Her long, dark bangs partly covered her left eye. She was probably due for another hair trim, soon.

"Um, the boys want to know if we can have a bedtime story," explained the girl softly.

"Do they, now?" Erwin cracked a grin at her. "And they sent you to deliver this request?"

She nodded somberly, her expression calm and more mature than it really should be for a girl her age. "They were both too chicken to do it themselves."

Erwin coughed into his hand with amusement, and Levi shook his head.

"Sending a girl to fight their battles for them," grumbled the captain. He tossed the covers down, revealing his pajama pants. "Typical."

Mikasa shrugged. "They always do this. Couple of sissies."

Levi almost cracked a smile, and he got out of bed and stretched a bit. "No arguments there, kiddo. All right, we're coming. Tell your pansy boyfriends we'll be in there in a few minutes."

"Thank you, Captain." Mikasa closed the door and left them in peace.

"Some things never change," remarked Erwin as he too got out of bed. Technically the kids only needed _one_ of them to read a story, but he wasn't about to leave all the parenting up to Levi. "She's still got an iron spine, for certain."

"Yeah, and more balls than Eren and Armin put together," quipped Levi. "I think we need to work on getting those two to man up. Arlert might be hopeless, but I know damned well Eren's got a pair."

"You still intimidate them, even though they admire you as much now as they did previously." Erwin circled the bed and embraced Levi. "You may not have grown up with a father figure of your own, but you're turning out to be an outstanding one for these kids."

Levi gazed up at him thoughtfully. "You think so?"

"Absolutely," responded Erwin without hesitation. He cupped the smaller man's chin and he kissed him on the mouth. "Look at what you've done for them. They're quite the lucky trio."

The dark sweep of Levi's eyelashes concealed the silver in his eyes as he dropped his gaze. He gave a shrug, trying to seem casual. "I only did it 'cause I know the brats. If it had been some random group of kids, I'd have never gone through the effort."

"You love them," observed Erwin with confidence. "You always have, though you'll never admit it."

"Fuck you," groused Levi, blushing. "Let's just read them their damned bedtime story so we can get to sleep."

Erwin suppressed a chuckle as his betrothed extracted himself from his embrace and marched for the door. Levi had never been good at admitting his feelings. Having him be the first to say "I love you" was a pleasant surprise for him. Knowing his surly lover had his limits, he wisely chose not to say more.

* * *

-To be continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> End of Chapter Recap:
> 
> Social Worker: "Do you keep guns in the house?"
> 
> Erwin: *whistles innocently*
> 
> Levi: "Maybe just a little."
> 
> Erwin: "Levi, could you try being a little polite?"
> 
> Levi: "You mean telling her to hurry up and get it the fuck over with was rude?"
> 
> Erwin: "Ahem...just a little bit."
> 
> Levi: "Maybe I should flirt with her like you do."
> 
> Erwin: *gasp* "I wasn't flirting!"
> 
> Levi: "Please. you practically offered your dick on a silver platter."
> 
> Erwin: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) "I think I detect some jealousy."
> 
> Levi: (;_) "Go write a book, poindexter."
> 
> Erwin: "How can I make it up to you, then? Bondage, maybe?"
> 
> Levi: "...okay."
> 
> Mikasa: "Sorry to bother you, but my 'brothers' were born nut-less and they wanted me to ask if you'll read us a bedtime story tonight."
> 
> Erwin: "Yes, we'll agree to those terms, and afterwards I'll arrange for surgical ball implants for those boys."
> 
> Me: "Okay, that was going too far."


	23. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the extended delay in updates. Personal life got in the way a bit.

Hanji and Moblit couldn't have picked a better time to finish their tour of service. It was two weeks before the wedding, and Levi got word that the pair would be coming to Mitras to visit for a while before returning to their respective homes. He felt oddly eager as he waited at their arrival gate in the airport. Erwin was at home with the kids, and he'd offered to prepare dinner for everyone while Levi went to pick his comrades up. He cursed softly in frustration as his view was blocked yet again by taller people, and he almost wished he had a box to stand on. That would be humiliating, though. He was a grown-ass man, not some little kid.

Finally, he saw a glimpse of Hanji's familiar, shaggy brown ponytail. She and Moblit were among the last passengers to emerge from the hallway. Levi hopped a little, waving to get their attention.

"Over here, four-eyes," he called.

No familiar, reckless smile graced her lips as she spotted him and urged Moblit to follow her through the crowd toward the captain. There was a grim darkness to her eyes that Levi had never seen before, and she had a healing scar slashing over her left cheekbone. By the looks of it, the cut must have been deep and required stitches. Levi's subtle excitement to see her again died quickly, and he could only imagine what horrors she must have seen after he left Maria.

"Hey you," greeted Hanji with a decidedly weak smile. She hugged Levi tightly, her embrace lingering for longer than he would normally find comfortable. He put up with it though, sensing she needed the contact.

"Hey yourself. How was your trip?"

She released him and stepped back so that Moblit could shake Levi's hand in greeting. "I slept through most of it. I've got some serious jet lag, but it can't be helped."

"It was a long flight," agreed Moblit.

"You'll feel better after a meal and a good night's rest," predicted Levi. "Erwin's cooking up some barbecue for us. Should be ready by the time we make it back to the house. We'll pull the bed out of the couch for you, if you two are okay with sharing. You don't need to go to some hotel if you don't want to."

"I'm fine with sharing," said Hanji with a shrug. "We've shared bed rolls and body warmth enough times, after all. Moblit's good about keeping his hands to himself."

Levi nodded, glancing at the doctor's assistant. He again felt a little sorry for Moblit, because clearly the man still harbored more than platonic feelings for Hanji. Too bad for him nothing would ever come of it, unless Hanji woke up one day and suddenly decided to go straight. That wasn't likely to happen.

"Sorry we don't have better sleeping arrangements for you."

"Hey, it's better than the cold ground." Hanji smirked, and she spread her hands. "Compared to the sleeping arrangements we've had for the past few months, a hide-a-bed sounds luxurious. I hope you don't mind us hitting your shower when we get there, though."

"You kidding? I'd insist on it even if you didn't ask. You both stink."

Hanji's laugh sounded almost normal. "Sorry, Levi. We didn't get the chance to clean up before we got on our flight. They loaded us onto transport from the base before the sun even came up, and it was a long day's travel to the nearest airport."

"Can't be helped. Come on; let's get your luggage and get out of here. I can roll the windows down to vent the body odor on the way home."

"Geez, we're not _that_ stinky," muttered Hanji.

* * *

Introductions were made between Hanji, Moblit and the children once they made it back to the house, though they'd already met at least briefly before. Levi helped Erwin with the finishing touches to the meal while their guests took turns showering and changing, and the kids set the table for dinner. It was a little cramped because the dining area was on the small side and they had to put the leaf in the table to make enough room for two extra places.

"We're looking into moving options," explained Erwin once everyone fixed their plates and sat down to eat at the table. "I do love this little house, but it's too small for the five of us."

"And you're sure the adoption is going through?" asked Moblit, sprinkling a little salt and pepper on his baked potato.

"It's almost guaranteed. It might have been more difficult if there were any relatives to claim the kids, but that isn't the case." He quieted down as the children of subject joined them at the table, and he gave both Hanji and Moblit a warning glance. They both seemed to pick up on his silent cautioning against discussing the lack of surviving relatives in the kids' lives.

"I'm glad it's all working out for you," Hanji said tactfully. She picked up a rib and took a bite, humming in approval at the flavor. "Mmm, this is good. Much better than the gruel and dried rations we've been eating every day this month."

"I would have made something fancier if I had considered that." Erwin grimaced a bit, frustrated by his lack of foresight. Of course their guests hadn't had a good meal for a while. Spare ribs, coleslaw and baked potatoes seemed like a poor excuse for a celebration feast.

"I'm not complaining," offered Moblit with a smile. "Like Hanji said: this is a huge step up for us. Thanks for cooking dinner."

As much as Erwin took care not to talk about the childrens' family situation in front of them, he didn't consider how his next words might trigger an inappropriate subject. "What happened over there after we left? You seem a bit different, Dr. Zoë. More reserved than I recall."

Erwin winced when Levi jabbed him in the shin with his boot, under the table. Realizing that he'd just brought something up that perhaps he shouldn't have, the blond offered an apologetic look at their guests; who had both become very somber. The horrors of war really wasn't ideal dinner conversation...especially with three young kids present.

"Forgive me," said Erwin softly. "That was rude of me. I shouldn't have asked, and you two came here for some R&R. I don't know what came over me."

"There's nothing to forgive," Hanji assured him kindly. Her smile trembled a bit at the corners, and her red-brown eyes bore a haunted look to them. "You were there too, after all. It's only natural that you'd be curious about what all you missed."

"Did you guys fight a lot?" Eren blurted. "Ow! What'd I say, Captain?"

Guessing that Levi must have delivered a nudge under the table to Eren the same way he'd done to him, Erwin came to the boy's rescue. "It was wrong of me to bring it up when our friends have just gotten back and are trying to enjoy a quiet meal, Eren. Let the matter drop."

"It's not appropriate conversation at the dinner table," advised Levi flatly. "Besides, the subject's upsetting Armin. Let's talk about something else."

Erwin looked at the blond boy to see that Levi's observation was right on the mark. Armin appeared to have abruptly lost his appetite, and he was staring down at his plate looking like he might start crying at any moment. It wasn't hard to guess where Armin's thoughts had gone. As a child of war who had lost his family to the violence, any mention of the conflict surely served as a harsh reminder of the things his young eyes had witnessed. Armin was the most sensitive one in the bunch, and he would probably cling to his loss longer than any of them. Damning himself for his insensitivity, Erwin scooted his chair back and patted his lap.

"Come here, Armin."

The child obediently got out of his chair and circled around the table to climb into Erwin's lap. Foregoing his own hunger, Erwin started to feed the boy himself. "You need to eat. I'm sorry my thoughtlessness upset you."

"He's always upset," informed Mikasa bluntly.

"Don't you go calling him a cry baby again," Eren warned her with a scowl. "It's not his fault."

"Oi, no fighting," warned Levi when the girl bristled. "Eat your food and shut your traps."

Even Mikasa was sufficiently cowed by the stern admonishment, and Erwin hid a smile. No matter how brave, no matter how bold, few had the stones to question the captain when he issued a demand. Even if Mikasa and Armin had no memories of their past lives serving under him and Levi in the Survey Corps, they instinctively fell in line when he put his foot down.

Dinner passed in relative silence after that. Hanji had three beers with her meal and Moblit had four. The dark blond man's cheeks were flushed tellingly by the time he finished dinner and Levi went to get out the dessert tray.

"Ooh, cupcakes!"

Levi smirked over Eren's expressed enthusiasm. "Don't get too excited, kid. It's sugar free."

"What's the point of that?" Hanji inquired. "Nobody at this table is diabetic, are they?"

"No, but I don't like to give them anything with sugar after five pm," explained Levi. "They'll be too hyper to go to sleep, and they've got school tomorrow."

"Ah, gotcha. Well, they look tasty, anyhow."

Hanji reached for one and took an experimental bite. "Hmm, not bad. I might not have even noticed if you hadn't said you didn't use any sugar. What did you substitute it with."

"Natural sweetener. I got the recipe online." Levi gave Eren a sharp look when the boy made a face at his treat, poking at it dubiously. "Hey, what's with that face? I don't have to give you dessert at all, brat."

At that harsh reminder, Eren started stuffing his face as if he feared Levi might snatch the treat away from him at any moment. Mikasa ate hers in silence, but Armin was too full to eat more than half. Erwin wrapped the remainder of the boy's cupcake up for later, and when Armin started to nod off in his lap, he gathered the little blond up and got out of his chair.

"Excuse me, I'd better get him into his pajamas and tucked in."

Hanji's smile was more genuine than any of the previous ones she'd given since arriving. "You know, that kid could be a child of your own loins, Erwin."

He tilted his head curiously. "What makes you say that?"

"Well, he's got the same shade of hair and eyes as you," she observed with a nod at the dozing boy in his arms. "He's even got thick eyebrows like yours. Are you sure he's not your love child from a previous visit to Maria? You used to date women, didn't you?"

Erwin chuckled, and he shook his head. "Sorry to disappoint and debunk your theory, but I've never been to Maria before my time there this year. The similarities between us are just a coincidence."

"Ah well. It would be an interesting twist." Hanji looked at the other two children as Mikasa covered up a yawn. "It looks like Armin's not the only sleepy-head. Here, let me help you get these nuggets settled in, and then we can talk more."

* * *

"You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to," Levi informed Hanji later, once the kids were all in bed.

They were outside on the patio by the koi pond, and Hanji was enjoying a cigar. Moblit had already gone to bed, having imbibed a bit too much to the point where he started passing out. She took a puff, and she blew a couple of smoke rings before answering him. "No, I should talk about it. The base therapist encourages discussing our experiences with someone we can trust, someone with a sympathetic ear. If anyone can understand what I went through, it's you."

Levi quietly braced himself. It would be selfish of him to ask Hanji not to give him the details just because he wasn't sure he wanted to know. She was his friend; probably his _best_ friend, and she deserved his support.

"Go on, then. What happened after we got separated?"

Erwin came out then, carrying three glasses of brandy. He passed them out and he had a seat next to Levi on the wicker loveseat. Hanji gratefully raised her glass in a toast, and then she downed half of it. Coughing a bit at the burn, she had another puff of her cigar.

"Things went south pretty fast, after you left. We had a saboteur in our ranks, Levi. They set us up for an ambush on our way to the next assigned location. Anyone the opposition didn't slaughter was rounded up and taken as prisoners of war. They took us to another concentration camp, and the conditions were much harsher than they were at the last one."

Erwin frowned in sympathy. "I'm so sorry to hear that. How many did you lose?"

Hanji compressed her lips, and her eyes started to glisten with tears. She looked into the water at the fish swimming peacefully beneath the surface, and her eyes lost focus. "About eighty percent of our unit."

Levi went still, his glass partway to his lips. He lowered it, and he couldn't hide the spasm of shock that rippled across his face. They'd suffered many losses before, but never so many at one time. Not even when his platoon got overwhelmed and taken prisoner did he witness such heavy losses.

"Damn, shitty-glasses." He didn't know what else to say. Words of comfort froze on his tongue, and he suspected they would have been meaningless even if he had the sense to utter them. Seeing her empty her glass, he leaned forward to pour his own untouched liquor into it. "You need this more than I do."

"Thanks, shorty." Hanji had another swig, and she shivered. "There's more. In addition to malnourishment and the struggle against scurvy and disease, those being held weren't treated as honorably as the last time we saw the inside of a concentration camp. Some of our men got dragged out of their beds and beaten within an inch of their lives. Others disappeared overnight, probably because they caused a little trouble. That wasn't the only abuse our people suffered at their hands, though. It was worse for the female soldiers in our ranks. An erect prick doesn't have a conscience, it seems."

Levi could well guess what she was hinting at, and his brows lowered dangerously. "How many?"

Hanji shrugged. "There were only half a dozen women that made it through the attack to get captured. I know at least three of them got violated. I treated them afterwards myself. One of them got pregnant by the time the camp got liberated by our allies."

She met his eyes, and she rocked a little, her eyes tearing up and spilling over. "I didn't have emergency contraception to give any of those poor things. I did what I could with what herbs I could gather, but botany is a poor substitute for modern methods. I don't know what happened with the unluckiest girl. She was sent home before me. I'll bet she arranged to have her pregnancy terminated as soon as possible, though."

"Either way, she's going to have to live with what happened to her for the rest of her life," observed Erwin with a frown.

Levi dreaded to ask his next question, and the rage he felt at the thought of it surprised even him. His hands clenched into fists, and he regarded Hanji searchingly. "What about you? Did those fuckers try anything like that with you?"

She reached up to trace the scar on her cheek. "That's how I earned this. He didn't get his way though, so you don't have to worry. He ended up in the ground."

Levi relaxed muscles that had hardened like iron. His relief was almost dizzying. "Good. Hope it wasn't a quick death."

Hanji smirked humorlessly, and a familiar, mad intensity lurked behind her gaze. "Oh, it wasn't. He was wearing his intestines as a belt by the time he drew his last breath. It was quite a sight to see."

Erwin stared at her as though suspecting a joke, but Levi knew Hanji was sincere. It shouldn't have surprised Erwin, either. He knew her just as well as Levi did, after all, even if Hanji didn't remember more than vague snatched of their previous life.

"I'm afraid to ask how you managed such a thing," admitted Erwin.

"All it takes is a sharp knife and a decent knowledge of biology." Hanji shrugged, but her fingers tightened around her glass, belying her display of casual indifference. "It's too bad I couldn't do the same to every single one of those animals that laid hands on someone. It wasn't just the women, either. It happened to a male soldier as well."

Hanji drew a shuddering breath. "It's always a terrible thing, but I think for a man, it's even more difficult to bear."

"Why would you think that?" Levi frowned. "Yeah it's fucking terrible no matter who it happens to, but at least guys can't get knocked up from it."

"No, but they don't get the support that female victims get. We're warned as soon as we're shipped out that there's a chance we could get violated if we're ever captured by enemy forces, but most people don't expect it to happen to a guy. I don't want to downplay anyone's trauma, but I think it's much harder for a man to come to terms with having something like that happen to them. I'm operating on assumption, of course."

She drew a shuddering breath, and she wiped at her eyes. It seemed the first teardrops to fall triggered her emotions into overdrive, and she bit back a sob. She looked between Levi and Erwin, and her face tensed with mental agony.

"I h-haven't talked to anyone this much about it," she confessed in a broken voice. "They were going to execute me...for killing my assailant. The counter-attack happened on the m-morning I was scheduled to die."

Levi's hands clenched into fists again. "Shit. Then you're lucky to be alive."

He reached into his pocket for the handkerchief he kept there out of old habit when Hanji started crying in earnest. "Here. Blow your nose."

"Sorry," she sniffled, gulping. "I don't know why I'm breaking down _now_ , of all times. This all h-happened last month."

"Maybe you didn't feel safe breaking down before," suggested Levi. Helpless to do more for her, he impulsively got off the loveseat, and he sat down beside her on the ottoman next to her chair. "It's okay to let it out, Hanji. You've been through hell. You're safe now."

Hanji blew her nose on Levi's handkerchief, and she looked at him with reddened eyes. She scrunched up the material in her fist, put her drink aside and threw her arms around him. Not knowing what else to do, he patted her back and let her cry it out on his shoulder. Erwin sat silently, watching with sympathetic blue eyes as his betrothed tried to comfort their old friend. Like Levi, he didn't seem to know what to say or how to help. After a few moments, he excused himself softly and left to refill their drinks, giving Levi and Hanji some time alone together.

* * *

"That was rough to hear," sighed Levi much later that evening as he and Erwin prepared for bed.

The blond nodded in agreement. While it wasn't so hard to imagine Hanji Zoë teaching a potential rapist a lesson in agony before killing him, the thought of her being put in a position to have to do that at all made him feel sick.

"I know it's of little comfort," he said, unbuttoning his shirt to pull it off, "but we can at least be thankful that she avoided the same fate as some of the other soldiers in her platoon."

"Yeah, but now she's got survivor's guilt." Levi also removed his clothing, starting with his boots and socks. "Not just because she lived to tell the tale while her comrades died around her, but because she managed to escape being violated in the process. I can't even guess what it must feel like for her. That's a lot of shit to take. Last time I saw her look like this was..."

Levi trailed off, glanced at his companion and snapped his mouth shut.

"Was when, Levi?" pressed Erwin. "Finish your sentence. I don't believe I ever saw Hanji in such a state before, myself."

The captain heaved a sigh, and he lowered his troubled gaze to focus on undoing his pants. "After you died. She had that same look on her face, like she wished she could have taken your place falling in battle."

Erwin went still, staring at him. Levi wouldn't meet his gaze.

"Tch. I probably had the same look," the smaller man went on bitterly. "I didn't have a mirror handy to check, though."

Erwin approached him quietly, and he cupped Levi's chin to urge him to look up at him. "My death wasn't something that either of you could have prevented, Levi. I don't clearly remember anything that happened after Zeke wounded me so badly, but I know you were both present when I passed. I could hear your voice. I heard the argument between you and Eren, though I can't remember exactly what words were exchanged."

"Doesn't change what it felt like to watch you slip away from us," insisted Levi softly. "I've never felt so fucking devastated in my life. I was even so careless Mikasa got the jump on me, and that never would have happened under any other circumstance."

Erwin raised his brows. "Did she? You haven't told me that before."

Levi shrugged. "I was about to give Armin the titan serum, but then a straggler from what was left of our team showed up with you and when I saw you were still breathing, I changed my mind. That was how the argument started. Jaeger tried to take the serum from me. It got ugly. I ended up with Mikasa's blade against my throat."

The recounting of such insubordination made Erwin go hot, then cold. He narrowed his eyes. "I had no idea. If I'd been there to see such a display of disrespect—"

"It was all based on sheer emotion," interrupted Levi. "Everyone's were running high. Eren and Mikasa were about to lose their best friend, and I was about to lose my commander...and the only man I'd ever been in love with. You can't blame them for wanting to save their friend, especially since I'd already been prepared to do it before I found out you weren't dead. As far as they were concerned, I went back on my word."

"So what happened after that?" Erwin pushed aside his feelings of anger toward the kids, reminding himself that it was in the past and Levi's logic was perfectly reasonable.

Levi met his eyes. "Like I told you before; I let you die. I wasn't going to, but then you spoke to me. You said something about your father. I decided I couldn't drag you back into hell with us...decided you were better off dead than spending another minute struggling for humanity's survival."

Erwin eased Levi's shirt off of his shoulders, helping him undress even as he listened intently. "But it was my duty to fight for humanity."

Levi sighed. "You'd done your part, Erwin. Humanity got as much out of you as it could, and I wasn't about to perpetuate your suffering. Truth is, I didn't give that injection to Armin out of compassion for him or the other brats. I did it because it was a better alternative than forcing you to live another moment in that misery."

Levi had already alluded something of the sort the last time they'd talked about this subject, but now he was imparting details he'd skipped before. He was gazing up at Erwin with so much earnest passion in his normally opaque eyes, opening up to him completely. Erwin caressed the smaller man's beloved face, aching for him.

"I'm sorry for leaving you, even if you say it was your choice to let me go."

"I was selfish. I didn't want to be the reason you kept on suffering. Couldn't bear the thought. If I'm brutally honest with myself, the choice I made was the easy way out...a coward's way."

"You are _not_ a coward," insisted Erwin sharply. He cupped Levi's face in his hands, willing him to see himself the way he did. "You are by far the bravest person I've ever known, and the most loyal and caring, as well. No, don't shake your head. Listen to me and believe my words, Levi. You might have a thug's couth and mannerisms, but beneath all that, you do have a very generous heart. Look at what you're doing for those children, despite some bad blood between you in the past. You've forgiven them, you've provided a safe home for them and a good education, and in a couple of weeks, you're going to make me the happiest man in the world by exchanging vows with me. I don't want to hear you put yourself down again, understood?"

Levi parted his lips, looking briefly uncertain. When Erwin held his gaze with authoritative determination, his expression relaxed into a teasing hint of a smile. "Yes sir."

The mood shifted between them as the tension eased, and Erwin stopped dwelling on Hanji's earlier revelations. She and Moblit were back safe in their own country again. Their trials with the war were over with, and like himself and Levi, they had the chance to move on and heal from heartbreaking memories. It was perhaps a blessing that they didn't share the recollection of the previous life. Their burdens were great enough without it.

Erwin lowered his mouth to his companions...his lover, his friend, his most trusted compatriot. Soon, this man would also be his legal husband, and they would have a fresh start in a new home sometime after their honeymoon. Their parents had already agreed to share responsibility for the kids while they were away. Kuchel would take them for the first week, while Constance and Jeremy would take them for the second.

"Let's not talk about those dark times anymore tonight," urged the blond.

He pulled Levi closer, and he slid his hands down the smaller man's toned, fair body to work his pants and underwear down. Levi allowed him to finish undressing him, bracing himself with his hands on Erwin's shoulders as he stepped out of his remaining garments. Erwin bent over to collect them and toss them in the hamper, and he kissed Levi from the knees up as he rose back to his feet. He lingered for a moment at the captain's pelvic area, nuzzling his swelling groin and the crisp hair framing it for a moment.

"Are we busting out any toys tonight?" Levi asked, his voice quivering a little to betray his mounting arousal. "Better use a gag if we are, 'cause I don't think I can keep it down enough without one."

Faintly surprised that Levi would suggest being gagged—after all, he would ordinarily say such a thing wasn't sanitary—Erwin looked up from his crouching position. His hands stilled on Levi's hips as he considered him, and he saw no hint of sarcasm in that sensual, heavy-lidded gaze staring back at him.

"I don't think we need toys tonight," Erwin said at last. "Our guests have sharp ears, and I can imagine what Hanji would say if she overheard us."

"She might be too preoccupied right now to care if she heard us fooling around." Levi combed his fingers through the bigger man's golden hair. "Probably best not to take chances, though."

That was fine by Erwin. He didn't need restraints, vibrators or spanking to enjoy his lover, even if such things did add a certain spice to their intimacy that had always been lacking with other partners. Levi was exciting enough on his own, and the sex was always incredible no matter how they did it.

"If my cock is enough to satisfy you, then I agree."

"Don't be stupid," snorted Levi. He smirked down at him, and his fingers tightened in the blond's hair. His earlier submission vanished, and he regarded Erwin not as his old commander, but almost as a pet he intended to play with. "The toys are fun, but you're a good boy. I know you'll satisfy me, Erwin."

His actions made the blond wonder if Levi wanted to top tonight. That was usually the case when the man expressed his dominant side like this. "How do you want me, then?"

Levi took the question into consideration. He eased his hold on Erwin's hair, and he turned away. Still crouching, Erwin watched with hungry eyes as Levi bent over the side of their bed and looked back over his shoulder at him.

"Fuck me from behind," suggested Levi. "Shove my face into the mattress and remind me of who I answer to."

_Oh, I was wrong. That response was certainly...unexpected._

But no less welcome than what he'd anticipated. More so, even. As much as he loved every erotic moment with his Levi, Erwin did have a greater preference for being the giver than the receiver. Levi was the same, but in reverse. The mutual respect and devotion between them allowed all sexual encounters to come naturally and easily for them, even when Levi surprised him. Right now, the man was unbearably tempting in his welcoming poise.

"If that's what you want," husked Erwin, getting to his feet, "then I'm happy to provide." He unbuckled his belt and tugged his fly down as he approached, more than eager to assert himself as Levi wished.

* * *

God, the man could fuck like a beast. Levi was glad he'd changed his mind about which role he was taking. He'd initially thought it was a better idea for him to do the screwing, because he had trouble censoring himself when it was the other way around. As Erwin held him down by the back of the neck and pounded into him, Levi congratulated himself on making the right choice. Yes, he had to press his face into the bedding numerous times to muffle his swearing and moans, but it was well worth it. He frantically grabbed at the comforter as his lover again drove into him, aiming right for his prostate and hitting his mark perfectly.

"Have you remembered your place, Captain?" panted Erwin into his ear, bowing over him. He stopped thrusting, and he rocked his hips from side to side, massaging the smaller man inside with his hard, thick length. "Will there be further insubordination from you, hmm?"

"Ah...n-no sir," gasped Levi. His eyes rolled back, and he whimpered. Fuck, it kept stroking that spot. The steady jolts threatened to make him lose his composure completely, even as the lack of thrusting frustrated him. "So fucking big...feels like you're in deeper than anyone's ever been before."

Erwin withdrew, and then drove back home with a powerful thrust that made Levi bite the covers to gag his cry. The mattress had slid a little on the bed, hanging off a bit on the opposite side. Levi twitched inside the condom they'd thoughtfully applied to contain the mess he was no doubt going to make. He was so close. Just a few more pumps and he'd be there.

Then Erwin said something that knocked Levi completely for a loop.

"Call me 'Daddy'."

Levi's eyes popped open wide, and he lifted his head off the bedding as much as Erwin's pinning hold would allow.

"What the fuck did you just say?" he rasped, craning his neck to try and look at the other man.

Erwin stared back at him with an equally stupified look on his handsome face, and he stammered. His cheeks went ruddy, and he looked like he was on the verge of panicking.

"N-nothing."

"Don't bullshit me," warned Levi, still hardly believing what he'd just heard fly out of Erwin's usually conservative mouth. "You asked me to call you 'Daddy'. Where the hell did _that_ come from, eh? You're a bigger pervert than I thought."

Erwin groaned, his eyes squeezing shut as if blocking out the sight of Levi's incredulous face would somehow save him from being judged. "I don't know. I swear to you, I've never thought this way before. It just came out. I never meant to say anything."

So, this wasn't a new idea of his after all. By the man's words and obvious embarrassment, Erwin must have been fantasizing about this scenario for longer than he let on. Levi wondered just how many nights his lover had wanted to make this request but was too wary of doing so. Erwin was still hard as a rock inside of him, but all it would take to put an end to this encounter was a word from Levi. The captain thought about it, and when he considered all the times Erwin had pulled off last minute plans without hardly a warning, the less surprising it seemed. He was a creative and ingenious man, and sometimes not even Erwin himself could predict what he would do or say next.

"This isn't anything new," observed Levi shrewdly. "You've given this some thought before tonight."

Erwin met his gaze uncertainly. "It's crossed my mind, yes. I didn't intend to say anything, though. It just slipped out."

The blond started to pull out of Levi, apparently getting the impression that the mood was spoiled. Levi pushed backwards against him, seating himself deeper on his length. "Did I say to stop?"

Erwin paused, looking at him assessingly. "You're sure you want me to keep going?"

"Why not? It's just a word, right?" Levi steeled himself, reasoning that after all of the other things they'd done so far together, this wasn't really a big deal. "Daddy."

Erwin looked completely shocked, and then the blue of his eyes seemed to blaze with lust. He thrust firmly, making Levi gasp. "Again."

"D-Daddy," moaned Levi, this time with more feeling. It was kind of weird, but not as bad as he'd anticipating. It wasn't like Erwin was the only man ever to get off on being called that by his partner. It was a fairly popular fantasy. Levi had just never participated in it himself before, though he'd seen his share of the scenario in porn. Obviously it made Erwin happy, because every time Levi used the title, the blond's fucking got more vigorous.

"Levi," groaned Erwin. He slid his hands between Levi's chest and the bedding to tease his nipples. "Nobody's ever excited me like you do."

The smaller man lifted his right leg, bending it and propping it on the lopsided mattress to enhance the penetration. He had to bury his face in the comforter again as the next thrust made him see sparks. He cried out "Daddy" again, but he doubted it was coherent enough to come out as more than muffled gibberish. All the same, Erwin's pumping sped up even more, and soon Levi wondered if perhaps they should have considered a gag for the blond.

He must have needed this more than he'd let on. Maybe Erwin himself didn't realize how much it would effect him for Levi to play along this way. He started to come first, but Levi immediately joined him when he felt the blond's length throbbing inside of him.

Erwin shook with the force of his climax, bending over Levi's half-prone form and pinning him down. Gasping into his ear, he kissed the shell of it and he spoke in a winded, husky voice.

"You are without a doubt, the most adventurous lover I've ever enjoyed."

"Glad you approve," wheezed Levi. He turned his head to kiss the other man on the mouth. "Don't ever be...afraid to talk to me about things...you want to do. The worst I can do is say no."

"The worst you can do," corrected Erwin, "is turn away from me in disgust. You _do_ know I didn't literally mean that in the context of a father and son relationship, don't you?"

"Didn't even cross my mind," assured Levi. "You can be a creep, but you're not _that_ depraved."

He fought a chuckle, and it turned into a gasp when his partner withdrew from him. Levi climbed onto the bed and rolled onto his back, catching his breath as he looked up at Erwin. "Besides, I think I corrupted you. You were pretty vanilla until I got my hands on you, right?"

Erwin lowered his gaze modestly, and he turned his back to Levi as he removed his condom and tied it off to dispose of it.

"Oi, are you blushing again?" Levi smirked at the taller man, amused. "You'd think I popped your cherry or something, Smith."

Erwin looked back over his shoulder at him, and Levi made himself stop staring at the man's muscular ass to meet his gaze. "I've just never been with someone that inspires such filthy thoughts in me," admitted Erwin.

At once, Levi felt bad for calling him a pervert. He removed his own soiled condom and followed his lover's example before sitting up in the bed. "So you asked me to call you 'Daddy'. That's nothing compared to some of the things people do. You haven't asked me to dress up as a schoolgirl or put on giant diapers or some shit like that."

Erwin looked torn between amusement and disconcertment. Sensing that he needed more, Levi got out of the bed with a sigh. He closed the distance between them, put his arms around the taller man and spoke softly to him.

"You said you don't want me putting myself down. I don't want you doing it, either. So what if you get off on a pet name? It's just a fantasy, and you said yourself you don't mean it in some literal context. We're both consenting adults, and I know you would have accepted it if I vetoed the idea."

Erwin relaxed, and he smiled in gratitude as he embraced Levi back. "I never would have guessed you were so open-minded, Levi. If someone had told me that one day you and I would be doing half of these things together, I would have scoffed and dismissed them as insane."

"You'd have found it that unbelievable, would you?" Levi brushed it off. He couldn't really blame him. "I probably would have reacted the same way. Doesn't matter that there was so much sexual tension between us it was sometimes smothering. I had myself convinced we'd never be anything to each other except captain and commander, no matter how much we both wished otherwise."

"Neither of us expected to be reborn into a more peaceful existence," reasoned Erwin. "I'm not even sure I believed in an afterlife, in those days."

The blond bent over to kiss Levi lingeringly. "Here. I'll take these and dispose of them." He took Levi's knotted condom from him, and he parted with him to retrieve his robe from the hook on the back of the bedroom door. "Hopefully we weren't loud enough to disturb anyone's sleep."

Levi turned his attention to the bed, reminded that they'd made quite a mess of it even if they hadn't gotten any of their spunk on it. "I'll straighten up the bedding while you do that." He glanced up at Erwin as the blond donned his robe, hiding his nudity from sight. "I think for once, you made more noise than I did."

"Probably," sighed Erwin in agreement. He combed his fingers through his tumbled blond hair, looking charmingly disheveled from their lovemaking. "If any of the children ask, I'll say I had a sore back and you were massaging it for me."

"Hmm, I guess that's believable enough. At least for the girl and the blond. Eren would probably know better, though."

"Oh? He's no older than the other two. What makes you think he has a better understanding of what happens between adults behind closed doors?" Erwin frowned. "Levi, please don't tell me someone molested that boy in Maria."

"Hell no, that isn't what I meant," clarified the captain. "I just mean Eren has all of his past life memories, and I'm pretty damned sure that kid didn't die a virgin."

Erwin blinked, forgetting all about the two condoms he held in his hand. "Eren?"

Levi sighed with exasperation. "Yes, Eren. Who the hell did you think I meant?"

"But...who?"

Seeing that his companion was clearly having difficulty with the concept, Levi tried to be patient with him. "Who was always clinging to him, Erwin? Who never let him out of their sight for long?"

"Besides yourself?" Erwin chuckled when Levi's eyes flashed. "I was kidding. It was your duty to watch over him, after all. I know Eren was inseparable from both Armin and Mikasa. Do you think he and Mikasa...?" Erwin couldn't seem to finish the sentence.

"Mikasa...Armin. Maybe both of 'em." Levi shrugged. "I'm not convinced none of that trio ever bumped uglies. There was always something more between them than friendship, just like there was with you and I."

"That doesn't mean they acted on it," reasoned Erwin.

"Think about it. Eren knew he had a death sentence coming to him no matter what happened. The shifter power comes with a heavy price, and anyone that gets it has their lifespan cut short. Eren had probably about six years left. Armin had about twelve, according to what we found out after giving him the titan serum. Don't you think knowing that might give a pair of teenaged boys incentive to experience sex at least once in their miserable lives before death comes for them?"

"I suppose by that logic, they might," conceded Erwin. "It's just difficult for me to imagine, but perhaps that's because I never thought of them as sexual creatures."

"Heh. Teenagers not sexual? What rock have you been hiding under? The only reason you and I weren't banging each other by the time we figured out our feelings was because we were old enough and mature enough to resist temptation, but I remember what it was like to be a teenager, even if you don't."

"I don't suffer any delusions about teenaged hormones," defended Erwin. "I just find it disturbing to imagine. How can you be sure your suspicion is right, though?"

"Eren changed by the time we made it to the ocean," explained Levi. "All that rage we knew him so well for was getting channeled differently. He was thinking with a clearer head. He'd grown inside, and I can pick out someone that recently got laid from a mile away."

"Oh." Erwin might have wanted to argue further with him, but by the disturbed look on his face, it wasn't a subject he wanted to keep thinking of. "Well, if that's so, then good for him...whoever he might have slept with."

Erwin frowned severely then, and his gaze unfocused.

"What? You look like you just smelled a fart."

"We've got to find a new house soon, with at least three bedrooms."

"Yeah. That's what we've been looking for." Levi tilted his head. "Why the sudden urgency, though? The social worker says our living arrangements are good enough for now."

"It's not child welfare that concerns me," mused Erwin. "It's Mikasa. It's acceptable enough for her to share a bedroom with the boys for now, but before long she's going to start becoming a woman. It won't be appropriate for her to sleep in the same room, once that happens."

"She's only eight years old," Levi pointed out. "I know some girls hit puberty sooner than others, but she's not going to get her first period tomorrow. Don't be paranoid."

"You said yourself that you think she and the boys had a sexual relationship. Who's to say the same thing won't happen in this life?"

"Because they're still just kids!" Levi's exasperation was getting the better of him. "Shit, the boys don't even have any hair on their balls yet. They were eighteen by the time I think they might have hooked up."

"I know that you think I'm being overly cautious, but I'm trying to think responsibly. We need to get them used to sleeping in separate rooms as soon as we can, and I'm sure there must be some law against them fraternizing the way you suspect they did in the past."

"Huh?" Levi was honestly confused by the last part. "Why would there be a law against them doing each other once they come of age?"

Erwin looked at him like he thought he was being dense. "Because of incest, of course. I thought that was obvious."

"But they're not actually siblings. They're fucking adopted. They've got no blood relation to each other at all."

"The courts might not see it that way," Erwin pointed out.

"If they have a problem with a pair of adults being in a consensual relationship no matter how they grew up together, then they're idiots," Levi said crisply. "There's no legal grounds to criminalize these kids if their feelings for each other change once they grow up, and I'll kick some ass if anyone tries to say differently."

"You seem very passionate about defending these kids' right to have sex, and as you've said: they're still only children."

Levi narrowed his eyes at him. "Just what are you accusing me of? I just think it's stupid to worry about the law coming down on them if they end up screwing each other some day—hopefully after they've graduated and moved out."

Erwin's face relaxed into an amused smile, and he laughed softly and shook his head. "I can't believe we're actually on the verge of an argument over this. You're right, Levi. It would be ridiculous for legal authorities to come down on them if they someday develop a romantic relationship with one another. I think my imagination just ran away with me because I'm admittedly having trouble with the idea of them doing something like that in the first place. I'm a strange man in that way. I'm perfectly capable of sending young people into battle to die, and yet I can't fathom the thought of them having a sex drive."

"Well, you'd better start fathoming it, because when Mikasa starts budding and Eren and Armin's voices start dropping, we're gonna be in for a world of drama." Levi grimaced even as he pointed that out. He was going to need his mothers advice more than ever, when that day came. "But for now, just don't panic. We've got at least a couple of years before we have to worry about acne, maxi pads or 'the talk', even if puberty hits sooner than average."

He wished he felt as confident as he sounded, but Levi found himself wondering just how soon he could expect Mikasa to blossom, and he made a mental note to have a word with his mother on the subject. Someone was going to have to teach the girl about her body. She was a tough kid, but even someone like Mikasa might freak out if she woke up one day to find herself bleeding with no idea why.

Erwin walked over to the bed, and he sat down beside Levi on it. "Are we ready for this?"

Levi met his lover's gaze evenly. "It's a little late to think of turning back now, isn't it?"

Erwin smirked, and he gave a single nod. "Yes, it is. But who's really prepared for parenthood, in the end?"

"I'd like to think my mother was, but I'll bet she'd say differently."

Erwin kissed him on the cheek, and he got back up. "I'd better do what I said I was going to do and get rid of these. I'll be back in a moment."

Levi nodded mutely, staring down at his lap as the blond left the bedroom. The nuances that would come with their decision to raise the trio as a family weren't things he hadn't carefully considered before making this decision, but the discussion of puberty and teen hormones did fill him with a sense of dread. The one thing that might make it easier for all of them was that this time, there would be no added drama of shifter powers or titans to worry about.

* * *

-To be continued


	24. Chapter 23

Hanji turned out to be a surprising help around the house while she and Moblit stayed, and that threw Levi off more than he wanted to admit. She'd never been much of a cleaner in the past, but perhaps her ordeals in Maria had such an effect on her emotional state that she found comfort in staying busy. She still wasn't very good at it, but she was always quick to rinse off her plates and put them in the dishwasher after eating. She made sandwiches for the children to take to school with them. She cleaned the toilet and the bathtub, and she helped Eren with his math homework in the evenings.

"Hey, I just wanted to let you know I appreciate all you've been doing," Levi told her one afternoon when Erwin and Moblit were out getting groceries. "You don't have to do the cleaning, though. Fixing lunch for the brats and helping them with homework is enough."

"Meaning I suck at cleaning and for once, you're trying to spare my feelings," she guessed, smirking sidelong at him. She finished scrubbing out the coffee mug she'd been drinking from, and she put it in the dish drainer. "What else am I supposed to do, Levi? I'm not used to sitting idle."

"Maybe you should try harder," he offered. "You just came out of a war. You should take this time to rest up and relax a little."

"Look at the pot calling the kettle black." She wiped her hands off, and she had a seat at the table with him. "Don't tell me you haven't been going stir crazy, waiting for that instructor job to open up for you. The Levi I know wouldn't be content sitting around doing nothing."

"You're right," he admitted. "I'm starting to look into other job options because I'm sick of them leaving me dangling on a fucking hook, but I did take my R&R when I first got back. Enough time has passed though, and I'm ready to get back to work and do something besides housekeeping and working out at the gym."

He reached out to give her wrist a squeeze. "Your situation's different though, shitty-glasses."

"How?" she asked. "You went through as much shit as Moblit and I have."

"I wasn't nearly raped."

Hanji stiffened at the frank reminder. Levi cursed himself under his breath. "Damn, I didn't think that through. I just mean you've—"

"I had a different experience than you did," she interrupted. "I see where you were trying to go with that, shrimp. Subtlety has never been your strong point, and I'm used to that."

She sighed, and she rubbed her forehead. "I just don't know what I want to do after this. I'm not going back to active duty again unless they force me to. I'm not sure about Moblit. He wants to keep working with me if I stick with medicine. I suppose I could work at the base hospital."

"If that's what you want to do, then go for it. You're good at it."

"Part of me wants to." Hanji met his eyes, and her expression was troubled. "Another part of me feels like I've been doing this gig for way too long. It feels like science and medicine has been my bread and butter for even longer than I've been alive. I love it, but sometimes I wonder if I'm missing out on something by not expanding my horizons. After the shit storm I saw in Maria, I feel like I need to explore new avenues."

Levi nodded, understanding better than Hanji could even imagine. "Then look into other things. You've got severance pay coming in to support you while you're checking out options. Try finding a hobby that doesn't involve poking people with needles and dissecting shit. Fishing, maybe."

"How is sticking fish with a hook and cutting them open to clean them much different from administering shots and performing dissection?" Hanji grinned at him.

"You know what I fucking mean," he groused. "It was just an example. There's all kinds of shit you could try. Windsurfing, golfing, collecting ugly old dolls. Plenty of choices."

"Hmm, I could see myself trying out windsurfing," she mused. "But what I want is to find an alternate career and get away from the medicine for a little while. Maybe I could learn to cook and work in a kitchen or something."

"That's just another kind of alchemy," Levi pointed out. "You'd do better as a mixologist, if you want to do something like that. Remember that chicken pot pie you put together once and how sick it made us? Stick with the simple shit like sandwiches."

"Wow, I didn't think it was that bad." Hanji waved a hand. "All right, fine. I've got no talent in the kitchen. I like the idea of trying out bartending, though."

"There's a sports bar on the military base here that's hiring," offered Levi. "If you're looking for a change of scenery, you could try it out and see what you think."

"You mean move here?"

Levi nodded. "Just a thought."

Another grin manifested on Hanji's lips. "Levi, do you miss your Hanji? Is that what you're hinting at?"

He sighed. "Leave it to you to take it to an extreme. I'm just offering you some ideas, four-eyes. Mitras is a little bigger than Trost, and there's a few more opportunities here. If you're bored with your work and your lifestyle, maybe relocation is your best option."

"Squeezing a little affection out of you is like trying to get blood from a turnip," she stated dryly, "but I'm still going to take that to mean you've got more personal reasons for wanting me to live closer than Trost."

She leaned back in her chair, and she stretched. "Anyway, I plan on sticking around until your wedding, at least. Am I still going to be your best man?"

He shrugged, and he sipped his tea. "Sure. Have anything appropriate to wear?"

"If you mean a dress, no. I do have a pantsuit I can wear, or I could rent something if you think a dress would be more appropriate."

"I can't see you in a dress. What color is the pantsuit?"

"Dark green. It's the one I wore to that shindig we had on the base before we shipped out to Maria, if you can remember."

Levi thought back on that night. "I thought that suit you wore was more of a teal."

"Teal _is_ a shade of green, silly. Anyhow, do you think that would work?"

"You've got it in your suitcase?"

Hanji nodded. "All right, show it to me and we'll see. I think it'll work and we've not making it a super fancy event, but I'd better have a look all the same."

* * *

Unfortunately, the suit Hanji had planned on wearing had a pretty nasty stain on it that sent her into a slight rage. When she took it out of her suitcase, held it up for Levi's inspection and saw the stain on the back of the pants, her mouth dropped open.

"What in the hell? How did _that_ get there?"

Levi stepped closer to see what she was talking about, and he frowned. "What is that, blood? Maybe you got your period during the party and you just don't remember it."

"No, I wouldn't have just wandered around with a leak like that, no matter how drunk I might have gotten. I've always got something on-hand for emergencies." She squinted at the dark stain, trying to make sense of it. Vaguely, she remembered sitting in something wet at the end of the night when her legs started to give out on her, and she groaned.

"Shit. I spilled a glass of wine and then sat in it," she confessed. "I remember now. I was planning to soak it after the party, but I must have gotten sidetracked and forgot."

"So you didn't even wash that thing after wearing it?" Levi clicked his tongue against his teeth. "Tch. You're such a fucking slob."

"Hey, you said I've gotten better about that!"

"As a guest, you have. No doubt your apartment's as cluttered and filthy as it ever was, though."

Hanji winced, recalling the one and only time Levi ever set foot in her place. She thought he was going to have a stroke right then and there, and she had to admit the stale smell was pretty obvious when one first stepped in.

"Well in any case, I obviously can't wear this," she deduced. "That stain's probably set beyond removal, now. Where can I go around here to look for an alternative?"

"I can take you shopping for something," he offered. "Just don't say anything to the kids. Eren loves going to the mall and checking out the game stores. He'd be pissed if he found out we went there without him."

"Mum's the word." Hanji gave her ruined suit one last, mournful look. She supposed it was past time for her to expand her wardrobe a little and own more than one dressy outfit, but that suit had seen a lot of events with her. "It's ruined, so I may as well toss it. Goodbye, 'greenie'. You were a good pantsuit to me."

"It's just clothes, Hanji." Levi shook his head at her theatrics. "You'd think you only have one formal outfit."

"Actually, I _do_ only have one formal outfit, and this was it. Don't tell me that surprises you."

Levi considered that, eyeing her quietly. "I've got to teach you how to dress yourself."

"How cliché; the gay guy handing out fashion tips."

"Piss off. I'm not some stereotype and I'm as masculine as any guy."

"More so than some," she chuckled, agreeing with him. "I'm just teasing, grump. I leave myself in your capable hands, and I'm sure we'll find something nice for me to wear for your special day. Oh, are you going to have a bachelor party? I think it would do Moblit some good to go to it, if you are."

"Nah, no bachelor party. Most of the people I'd invite to one wouldn't like the entertainment if I followed tradition, anyway. I don't think Moblit or any of the other guys want dudes in thongs gyrating against them."

"You could always just hire some girl dancers."

Levi shrugged. "Yeah, but it would seem kind of fucked up for a groom getting ready to marry another guy to surround himself with tits and ass. People might wonder if I'm a closet straight."

"Or they might assume you're bisexual and just happen to have found your match in another man. Don't most of your friends and associates know you're gay by now anyhow?"

"Yeah, and that's what would raise some questions I wouldn't feel like answering. Bachelor parties are stupid, anyway. Why celebrate getting hitched to the person you want to spend your life with by staring at other naked people? Doesn't make sense to me."

"You know, I never thought of it like that." Hanji considered the logic behind it, and like her friend, she found it flawed. "Now I wonder how that tradition came up and why. Maybe it started way back when people married for convenience over love, as a last chance for the groom to get some extra tail before getting the old 'ball and chain'. Now you've got me wondering."

"What are you doing?" Levi asked when she went over to her laptop bag to take the device out.

"I'm looking up the history of bachelor parties and how the whole idea started. Don't you ever wonder about these things, Levi?"

"Only when they're important to me." He plopped down on the couch beside her and watched as she powered up the computer to begin researching. "Do you look up every little thing you don't know the answer to?"

"Of course. How else am I supposed to learn things?" Amused by his puzzlement, Hanji waited for the computer to boot up before typing her phrase into the browser's search bar. She immediately found results, and they were a bit disappointing. "Oh. It just started out as a celebrating in honor of the groom's last night as a single man. It seems the dance entertainment wasn't even part of it until recently. Oh, look at this: the groom's best man is supposed to be the one that puts the bachelor party together."

"Don't get any ideas," warned Levi. "I'm not having one. You look bummed, four-eyes. What were you expecting to find?"

Hanji shrugged. "I don't know...something juicier than dinner and a toast to the groom. I guess I was imagining big orgies or something. According to this, the bachelor parties of yore were a lot tamer than what we practice today."

"So people made them more perverted over time. Big surprise." Levi relaxed, resting his arms over the back of the couch. "Can you imagine anyone having a party like that back in the days of the Scouts? There would have been scandal over it."

"Hmm?" Hanji gave him a puzzled look. "What do you mean, 'the days of the Scouts'?"

Levi stared at her, and Hanji thought she could detect the gears turning in his mind. As she awaited his explanation, she got the oddest feeling of Deja Vu. She remembered sitting on a couch with him very similar to this one, and they were both in uniform. The design of their uniforms was vintage, something one wouldn't expect to see modern soldiers wearing. She could clearly picture him wearing a cravat around his throat, and she blinked in disorientation.

"Wow, again."

Levi cocked his head silently.

"I feel like we've done this before, or something like this," explained Hanji. "I swear I've had a conversation with you about marriage and traditions before, but we were in a different place and we were dressed oddly...like in the dreams I have sometimes."

His expression became decidedly guarded. "Oh yeah?"

She tapped her chin in thought. "Yeah. Do you remember me asking you about reincarnation before? I know you think it's bogus, but sometimes I really think we knew each other in another life. Then again, maybe I've been influenced by that new book your future hubby recently published. I'm about halfway through it and I keep meaning to tell Erwin how much I'm enjoying it. Romance isn't usually my genre of choice, but I decided to give his novel a try since I liked his other books so much."

"What did you think of the characters?" asked Levi.

"Very believable," Hanji answered. "The mental imagery is so vivid, and it drew me in fast. You can really feel the emotions. It's easy to sympathize with those two men." She smirked at him. "In fact, they remind me of you and Erwin. He did say he was inspired by your relationship when he was writing it, so maybe they're actually based on you two."

"Think so, do you?" Levi's stare was still oddly unsettling to her. "What about the supporting characters. Did any of them jump out at you?"

"Yes, actually. I really identified with the mad scientist from the past life. I think her passion for understanding the origins of the titans is admirable."

Levi coughed suddenly, and he excused himself. "Gotta take a piss."

Hanji watched him go, and she narrowed her eyes in thought.

* * *

Apparently, his and Levi's mothers were both in a frantic state trying to pull everything together for the wedding party. Erwin called his mom while he was on his way home with the groceries, and Constance was in a nervous state that he wasn't used to experiencing from her at all. She was clearly distracted, and she was speaking with someone in the background while trying to talk to him at the same time.

"I'm sorry son, but could I call you back after dinner? I have a small catastrophe regarding flower arrangements on my hands, and I need to deal with it."

"Eh, very well," he agreed. "Mom, you really don't have to go through so much trouble."

"Nonsense. You're my only child, and making your wedding day memorable is important to me. Kuchel is in agreement, so no more arguments."

Knowing better than to argue with his mother when she was set and determined on a project, Erwin let the matter drop. "All right, Mother. I'm sure everything will come together just fine."

He hung up the phone, and he turned down his street. After pulling up to his place and parking the car, Erwin collected the groceries in the back seat. Glancing up at the sky, he decided that he should put the top up on his convertible just in case. There were dark clouds rolling in, and the wind was picking up. He focused on getting the goods into the house first.

"Levi? Hanji?" called out the writer. "I'm home with groceries. I dropped Moblit off at the base so that he could have a look around."

Receiving no answer, Erwin guessed they might be out back on the porch or out somewhere. He found his confirmation on the breakfast nook table. Levi had left a message for him on a notebook.

_"I'm taking Hanji shopping before school gets out. We'll pick up the kids on the way back. See you tonight."_

Mystery solved, Erwin put the groceries down in the kitchen and went back outside to get his top up on his car. His timing wasn't perfect; it was already sprinkling. Cursing softly, he hurried to the automobile, got the top up and retrieved the towel he kept in the trunk. He wiped down the leather seats to dry off the moisture on them, and then he went back inside to put away the groceries.

Erwin's home phone rang while he was in the process of doing that, and he hastily set down one of the bags so that he could go and answer it. When he saw the number on the caller ID, he tensed. It was the elementary school office. Hoping none of the kids got injured or sick, he picked up immediately.

"Smith-Ackerman residence."

"Hello, this is Principal Tully at Calvin Parish Elementary," answered a woman's voice. "Am I speaking to Mr. Smith or Mr. Ackerman?"

"Mr. Smith," answered the blond. "What can I do for you today?"

"I'm calling in regards to Eren Jaeger, sir. Are you able to come in for a consultation meeting? I'm afraid your foster son is in some trouble."

Erwin rubbed his forehead, fighting back a groan. "What did he do?"

"He got into a fight with a couple of other boys on the playground during recess. He roughed them up pretty badly, and he's got some scrapes and bruises himself. This is the third incident since Eren enrolled here, Mr. Smith. We need to discuss options, and I would prefer to do it face-to-face; preferably with both you and your partner."

Erwin scrubbed his fingers through his hair. "Eren got into a fight. It must be Tuesday."

* * *

The shopping excursion was interrupted by a phone call from Erwin about the kids. Levi had to go, and Hanji suggested he leave her at the mall to finish up and she would take a cab back. Irritated that Eren had gotten himself into trouble again, Levi drove to the elementary school to meet up with Erwin and the principal. He found Eren sitting in the hallway outside the principal's office, and Armin was beside him. Not yet aware of the details surrounding this incident, Levi took stock of their condition.

Eren had a scrape on his chin and a bandage on his forehead. Otherwise, he looked okay. Armin had a bruise on his cheek. It wasn't hard for Levi to guess what had happened, but right now he was too annoyed to ask the boys without cussing or raising his voice. He gave Eren a withering look that had the little boy slumping guiltily in his seat, and he pushed open the office door.

Erwin was seated inside, talking quietly to the middle-aged woman in the pantsuit behind the desk. Levi nodded to them both in greeting, and he had a seat beside his lover.

"What happened?" he asked flatly.

Erwin crossed his legs. "Our boys say the fight started because the other two boys involved were picking on Armin. Eren came to his defense, and Armin ran for a teacher when it got ugly. The teacher broke it up, but not before Eren broke one boy's nose and knocked the other one's tooth loose."

Levi didn't find that a bit surprising. "Armin's got a bruise on his face, too. Did you see it?"

Erwin nodded. "Yes, and Armin isn't known for lying, even to cover for his companions. I believe their account of it."

Levi looked at the principal. "What's your take on this? Did you talk to the parents of the other boys too?"

"Yes sir, we had our meeting before Mr. Smith arrived," she assured him. "The other boys claim Armin sicced Eren on them."

Levi huffed and shook his head. "Do they, now? What reason would he have to do that?"

"They claim there was an argument in the cafeteria after Armin cut in line." By the frown on her face, Mrs. Tully didn't quite believe that.

"So the fragile, shy little cauliflower allegedly cut in line and then organized for his adopted brother to beat up the two guys he did it to? Don't tell me you buy into this story."

Erwin spoke up. "First of all, Armin is a lover and not a fighter. He's also unfailingly polite and considerate to others. Even if there was a misunderstanding that led to him being resentful of these other boys, he would never encourage his brother or sister to do violence in his name. In fact, he would probably be trying to discourage it. I think you know that, Principal Tully."

"I agree that it seems unlikely for Armin to do those things," she conceded. "Unfortunately, nobody except the boys actually witnessed who started it. It's their words against each other's. I can't take sides and dole out punishment only to one party without proof that they were in the wrong, you understand."

Erwin nodded. "Yes, I do understand. Discipline shouldn't be biased. I would just ask you to take into consideration that these kids—ours, I mean—have been through war. All three of them have been traumatized, and Eren hasn't learned to control his anger issues."

"Which is why expulsion isn't being considered," granted the principal, "though the parents of the other boys were pushing for it. Apparently Eren threatened to kill them, and the teacher that broke up the fight heard him yelling it."

"Shit," muttered Levi under his breath. Aloud, he came to Eren's defense. "Mrs. Tully, Eren's a scrapper when it comes to protecting his siblings. He's had to be in order to survive. That talk of killing is just talk, though."

_Except when it comes to titans, traitors and murderers, but those kids he smacked around don't fit on that list._

"I understand that, Mr. Ackerman. However, these incidents can't keep happening. We need to come up with a solution to bring this under control, or Eren is going to have to go to a special school."

Levi's eyes narrowed. "I'm not putting that kid on the short bus just because he beats up bullies now and then."

"Levi, please," cautioned Erwin gently. He addressed the principal. "What's your disciplinary proposal, ma'am? We'll work with you on this, and we'll correct the situation."

"A week's suspension for Erwin, and three days detention for Armin," she answered. "As for the medical bills for the other boys, I would recommend you contact the parents and work something out to keep the peace."

Erwin sighed. "I'll offer to pay half. I think that's as far as I'm willing to compromise, because I fully believe they instigated this."

"What about the other two brats?" Levi demanded. "Are they getting any punishment?"

"Of course. Three day's suspension."

Levi exchanged a look with Erwin and shrugged. It was better than nothing. "Where's Mikasa at? She mustn't have been around to see it happening, or she would have gotten in on it too."

"She's currently in gym class," explained the principal. "She hasn't been informed of this yet. I thought it was best to let you handle that as the parents, though by the end of the day, I'm sure she may hear some rumors about it."

Levi relaxed. At least _she_ wasn't in trouble, too. "All right. We'll check Eren and Armin out and take them home after we finish here. One of us will come and pick up Mikasa after school."

"Please give us the names and numbers of the other parents," reminded Erwin. "The last thing I want is for this to end up in a lawsuit."

* * *

"All right, you two," Levi said once he got the kids buckled into the back seat of his car. "Let's make this short and sweet. Tell me what exactly happened."

Both of them started chattering at once.

"One at a time," barked the captain. "Armin, you go first."

"Kevin and Randy don't like me," explained the blond boy. "They're always knocking my books out of my hands in the hallway, calling me names and being nuisances. Nothing happened in the cafeteria today, sir. They just felt like picking a fight with me while I was reading my book under a tree. I guess they don't approve of reading."

"So they came up to you and started it," Levi surmised. He adjusted his rearview mirror to look at the boy. "How did your face get bruised?"

Armin lowered his gaze. "That happened when they tried to take my book from me. I wouldn't let go, and I called them a pair of stupid savages. That was when Randy punched me, and Eren came running up."

The scenario was so easy for Levi to picture in his mind. Armin had always been an attractive target for bullies, with his brainy ways and meek demeanor. Of course by the end of the previous life, the blond had grown quite a spine of his own and a tactical pragmatism to match Erwin's. In this life, however, he was still just a kid without access to his memories of those times. He'd have to learn to fend for himself all over again.

"All right. Eren, let's hear your take on it."

Eren wasn't as fluent in Sinarian as Armin was, and he had trouble remembering words when he got upset. He gave his explanation in the Marian tongue. "I saw that bastard hit Armin, so I beat him and his friend up."

_Well, I'd asked for short and sweet. If there's one thing Eren's good at, it's doing as I tell him._

Levi made a mental note to be more diligent in checking his language around the kids, though. In Eren's case, the brat had all of his past life memories so he often employed more adult language when frustrated. Levi didn't want the other two picking up on the habit and cussing people out at school, though. That wouldn't leave a very good impression of his and Erwin's parenting skills.

"Sounds like a pretty simple situation," Levi said aloud. "Eren, I know you hear me spouting off profanities a lot more than I should around you, but you're too young to talk like that. As far as what happened today, you took it too far."

"What was I s'posed to do, Captain?" demanded Eren. "We always take care of each other, and that guy was hitting Armin for no good reason! I couldn't just let them get away with it."

"Calm down and don't get mouthy with me," snapped the captain in Marian. Levi suddenly wished Erwin had put the kids in his car to have this talk instead, because he thought he might have handled this with more patience. Levi was getting frustrated, and it wasn't entirely because Eren chose to swing his balls at the worst possible times.

"You weren't wrong in defending Armin," Levi went on, trying to put his thoughts into words that wouldn't sound like he was encouraging mindless violence. "You crossed a line, though. Should have stopped and ran for a teacher as soon as you had those boys down. Instead, you kept hitting them. If Armin hadn't found an adult in time, you might have done serious damage to them and to yourself."

Levi turned down his street, and he adjusted his rearview mirror to look Eren in the eye. "You've got to learn some discipline, boy. You've got to control that rage of yours and figure out how to channel it properly. Use your head, understand? You know how I've been known to teach lessons, right?"

Eren paled. "Please don't kick me, Captain."

Armin blinked. "What?"

Maybe Levi had taken it a touch too far himself. Bringing up his past methods of disciplining Eren probably wasn't a good way to rein him in. After all, he might have the memories of a soldier, but he was still just a little kid.

"I'm just making it clear that if you don't start controlling yourself better, a good talking to isn't going to cut it anymore. I have a nice collections of belts, Eren. I'm not above reddening your little ass with one of them if that's what it takes."

"Y-yes sir."

Satisfied that the boy had been sufficiently cowed by the warning, Levi pulled up to the curb of their home so that he wouldn't block Erwin's car in. He got out and he waited for the kids to unbuckle themselves and get out too. Eren had trouble with his seatbelt, so Levi had to intervene before the kid got frustrated all over again. It was starting to rain again, so he tried to hurry it up.

"All right. Go inside and wash up," he ordered them. "Don't forget your backpacks. If you have homework, do it immediately. Neither of you are to leave the house. Eren, no video games for you until your punishment is over with and you're back in school."

"Can I watch TV later?"

Levi thought about it, and he almost denied the request. Eren needed some kind of mental stimulation though, or he'd start chewing up his pencils out of boredom and frustration. "You can watch your after school shows when Mikasa gets home. That's it. Now get inside before your books get wet."

* * *

Erwin was already on the phone speaking with one of the parents of the other boys when Levi and the kids came in. He glanced at his partner with a tired little smile before speaking further with the woman on the other line.

"I apologize for my son's behavior. He's being punished for his actions, and I'm sure you and your husband will do the same with your son. Yes, Eren went too far and I can assure you that we're going to address that. Please accept my offer to cover half of the medical bill, ma'am. Yes, that would be fine. Just contact us when it comes in, and I'll cut you a check. Have a good day."

Erwin hung up the phone. He turned to Levi as the smaller man approached. "That's one down and one to go. This one is going to cost us a bit because it's the boy with the broken nose. Hopefully any dental bills for the second boy will be less expensive."

"I wouldn't count on it." Levi went to the fridge to procure a bottle of water for himself. "Dental is just as ridiculous as medical, these days. Too bad I can't use my military health benefits to pay for this shit."

"We'll manage," promised Erwin. He took a page from Levi's book and got a bottle of water for himself. Outside, thunder boomed overhead. He heard Armin yelp, and he was glad they'd gotten them home before the worst of the weather came in. "Do you want to handle the other parents, or would you rather leave that to me?"

Levi took a swallow of his water, and he shook his head. "You. I interrogated the kids on the way home and had a talk with Eren. I don't have the patience to deal with outraged parents right now. I'd want to ask them what the hell they plan to do to teach their bratty little crotchfruit thugs not to bully smaller kids and—"

Erwin covered Levi's mouth with his hand, cutting him off. He smirked and shook his head, nodding toward the living room where the boys were just sitting down to do their homework. "Careful with the language."

Levi's annoyed look faded, and he nodded. Erwin took his hand off of his mouth, and he sat down at the table. "I'll call the other family in a moment. I have to prepare myself in case they aren't as reasonable."

Levi sat down with him. "I'm starting to think public school might not be for Eren, right now."

Erwin raised a brow. "Oh? Is this because of the principal's suggestion about a special school?"

Levi shrugged. "Kind of. I don't want to send him to one of those kind of schools either, though. He's struggling enough without having to deal with other kids with problems. I'd say we could try home schooling until they have an instructor position for me at the academy, but isolation isn't what the brat needs."

"Private school, then?" Erwin scratched his chin. "It would be a more controlled environment, but they have standards we may not be able to meet."

Levi shook his head. "No. I'm thinking military school."

Erwin hadn't considered that option, and that honestly surprised him. He spoke in a low voice so that the kids wouldn't hear him, intrigued by the idea. "Levi, that may be exactly what he needs. It would be somewhat familiar to him, considering his memories of the past. It would be secure, he could learn some discipline and he would be around his own peer group."

"I thought you'd approve of the idea," sighed Levi, obviously relieved. "Those are my thoughts, too. Wouldn't want to separate him from the others, though. Armin and Mikasa would have to go, also."

"That may be an issue," mused Erwin with a frown. "Military schools are usually separated by gender, aren't they? Mikasa may not be able to attend the same one."

"Most of them are like that, but some are co-ed. They just separate the girls' barracks from the boys'. I'll get on the horn with some people tomorrow and see what I can dig up."

Erwin nodded. Levi had all the right connections to get that information, and he thought it was a genius idea. "We can only try. Would you mind picking up Mikasa this afternoon? I told Moblit to call me when he's finished touring the base, and I still have to talk to those other parents."

"Yeah. Shit, I'd better call Hanji too. She said she'd take a cab, but I don't want her wasting the money if I'm free to go get her."

* * *

As it turned out, the second kid's parents were less of a problem than the first one's. After speaking with them over the phone, Erwin found out that the tooth Eren had knocked out was already loose...just a baby tooth. In a way, he'd done the boy a favor. Erwin had to talk the father down a bit anyway; not because of the fight, but because he'd heard that Eren threatened to kill his son.

Erwin played a bit of hardball and played on the man's sympathies to cool him down. He explained to him that Eren and his siblings were foreign refugees that lost their homes and families in the war. He also pointed out that the trio grew up under much harsher conditions than the local kids in Mitras, and they were still learning to adapt to their new lives. That seemed to do the trick. The man agreed to let it slide, and he told Erwin not to worry about covering any medical expenses.

Erwin gave Levi a recount of the phone conversation later that day, after everyone was home and getting ready for dinner. The couple sat outside under the porch near the koi pond, watching the lightning flash across the sky.

"You seem to really be capitalizing on playing the pity card when there's any trouble with those kids," observed Levi. "Don't make that too much of a habit, Erwin. You don't want to excuse shitty behavior on growing up under shitty circumstances."

"I hadn't realized I was doing it," admitted Erwin with a frown. "I see your logic. I'll be more careful with that."

"Mom taught me that," informed Levi. "She wouldn't let me get away with stuff just because I didn't have a dad and we were poor. Not that she _knew_ about everything I did, but when she found out about any of it, she always made sure I knew I wouldn't get a free pass because of our struggles."

"That makes perfect sense." Erwin patted Levi on the knee. "And you grew up to be a fine man in both lives, potty mouth or not."

Levi flushed, more pleased with the compliment than he cared to admit.

* * *

-To be continued


End file.
